(D&D5e): Protea - Episode 10: The Chaos Goblins

[00:00:10] In a world long forgotten and forsaken by any gods, the mortal races have edged out a tenuous but thriving existence, fending off vile monsters and evils that linger from ages past. It is here several young adventurers are about to get caught up in events that will shake the very foundations of this world.

[00:00:35] As chaos begins to spread and a demonic legion threatens to make landfall on the shores of this world. How will these wayward youths fare? Welcome to Protea. Hi, welcome to One Less Die, a 5th edition actual play podcast.

[00:01:01] Tonight we're hopefully tying up the loose ends of Protea with the aptly named Chaos Goblins. We are missing one player tonight. It was impossible to get her here. So we have a substitute. That's the word I was looking for, a substitute. So everybody go ahead and introduce your characters. We'll start on my left. Greetings, Arcus here. Hi, I'm the substitute.

[00:01:32] Your character's name is? Arc. Great. Onyx over here. Sparrow. Okay, so when we last left off, Ebon said that you guys are going to have to run through the night. You're still, I believe, a couple of days from Bronco. Oh. And you guys are being chased. Okay. And we're completely aware? Yes. Sparrow told us. Okay. Thanks, Sparrow.

[00:02:01] For your contribution to the team. So, Arc, can you give me any reason why you are in the woods right now? Because I'm a bird. Because I'm a bird. You're just a bird. Wait, it's nighttime and you're an owl, aren't you? Yeah. You're out doing owls. Well, it is late evening. The sun hasn't gone down yet. So you're about to be doing owl things. You're getting ready.

[00:02:30] You're psyching yourself up to go out and do owl things. Oh, wow. Yeah. So you're out hunting then? Sure. Great. All right. Perfect. So, you guys are traveling into the evening. I need everybody to give me constitution checks. Let's go one of them. No, no, no. Aye, aye, aye, aye, aye. Eighteen? Yeah. Wait, sorry. What'd you say? Eleven. Constitution. That's okay.

[00:03:02] Fourteen. Seventeen. You guys all did quite well. Fantastic. And ten. Oh. That's okay. That's a little more poor, but you're not with the group yet, so it's not going to affect you the same way. What's your constitution on fire? Minus three, so seven. Why is your constitution? What is your constitution? What is your constitution? Oh, no. What's that like? That sounds like a six. Yeah, something like that.

[00:03:33] A five. Oh, God. Oh, no. Well. Now I understand why your hit points were what you said they were. Okay, Jesus Christ. You didn't win the picture that much. Imagine Jennison gave her 21. All right. A little best friend. Very good point. Okay, so. As we're running through the night, oh, right, I guess I need to roll for Evan as well.

[00:04:03] Ooh. He's not doing so great. He's lagging behind, folks. Oh, no. Oh, shit. I think he needs to take a break on the cart. He had a rough wake up. He did. He did. I need everybody to give me perception check. Oh, shit. I can get it all. Six. I gotta give the starting roll. I gotta give the starting roll. Perception would be a good wisdom and proficiency. If you're proficient.

[00:04:33] If you're proficient. Oh, my god. I don't know what the intention is. Uh, six. Should I roll for this one as well? Ten. Yes. Eight. Ten. That'll be twenty. Okay, great. Is he not rolling? Seventeen. I did. He did. I did. I did both times. What are you honoring?

[00:05:05] If you guys can tell, you've lost them. Wait, wait, wait. Them or? Lost them? Lost them? Evan and I? Evan. No, you've lost your pursuers. Oh. Wow. Oh, yeah. We're doing great. That's what you think you're doing. Oh, great. Awesome. We're doing great, guys. They're gone. They're a long time. Yeah. I just move my head beside one of theirs and I still see them and they just don't. They just like, ah, there's fog in the way. They're literally just right there.

[00:05:35] Right there. We're conveniently looking the wrong way. Just looking up. Oh, I don't see them. Can someone fly away? You're looking up. I don't see them. Those of you who got above a twelve on your perception check, you're noticing signs that there's still no wildlife. There's no bird calls. There's no frogs making sounds in the trees. There's no crickets.

[00:06:04] So it's like just dead silent. It's dead silent. What a lovely day. Which you should take to mean that there are heavy predators nearby. A threat. Because everything's gone silent. What a lovely day. Not a threat inside. No. No. No. You guys can try to... What would you guys like to try to lose your... What would I like to try to lose your... What would I like to try to lose your tail? We haven't... Have we found Ark yet or is it... No. No?

[00:06:33] So what would I like to do is what you're asking me. Yes. Okay, great. So I got to think. It's a lovely day. Yep. No, a predator inside. Nothing. It's really quiet. Very nice. I think I hear the cry. There might be some birds somewhere. You hear nothing. Like, I've been the only one lagging behind slightly. Yeah, a little bit. He's the one driving the cart though, so... I'm imagining the birds. You're imagining the birds. I don't know. My gut just literally told me to like... Like just like...

[00:07:02] Turn to them and just like tap on my shoulder and just like... Just like, listen. There's nothing. Yes? How good does that actually sound for us if there's no sound at all? Perfect. There is nothing here that means. It doesn't... Because you're both, it doesn't mean you're an idiot. You still have common sense. No. At least I hope. If I can't see anything, there clearly must be nothing. It doesn't mean you can't have common sense. I hope you have common sense.

[00:07:32] I do. I'll turn to them and like tap... I do. I'll like tap the two of them and say like... Just the thought of not hearing anything around at all like rick is nothing sound... Like feel off you guys. You must have scared them away. Maybe throw the pettletalk and it's... I wouldn't have scared them away. If all the pettletalk I would never have scared them away. Yeah Arceus, maybe it's really just you clanging around in your armor that's making them be quiet. Oh yeah. It must be that. I just... I sound so nice. Cling, clang.

[00:08:01] Clang, clang, clang, clang. What was your perception test? I got 17. Okay, I think you're good. Need you three to give me a stealth check. Stealth... Great. Okay, um... Did they already test this with the hag? Oh! Wait, I was gonna say us three, the ones that are together right now. Yeah. Tanner! I have to roll it. I'm sorry, who?

[00:08:32] I knew it. I knew it. I said it again. I'll show this next day. Wait. Wait. Won't you... No, no, no, no, no, please don't be just me again. What is it? Perception? Perception is a stealth check. No, you're gonna make a stealth check. I don't want it. That's a critical fail. Hold on, wait, wait, wait, wait. No! Wait. I mean, I didn't do much better. Wait, let's see. What is stealth? What is stealth? Stealth? Sorry, I can add the bonus. I'm too blind. And then add also proficiency. Maybe I can save this. Maybe I can save this.

[00:09:01] Bonus as well. 21. Yep. Hot damn. Yeah. However, this was a group stealth check. I have three tallying things up together. Three. So as you guys are trumping down this goat track, twisting and turning through the... Good for you. Good for you. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I'm... I've been rolled a four. I'm big for a reason. They're gonna see me. They're gonna see me. They're gonna see me. And I'm made of metal. Okay.

[00:09:27] As you guys are driving down this twisty goat track, you're not being... You think you're being quiet. We're a real stealthy gang, guys. But unfortunately, Arceus keeps talking about how quiet we're being. Hey guys, guys, guys. We're quiet, right? We're being so quiet. They'll never hear us. If they're there, they'll never hear us. Hey guys, guys, guys. We're being so quiet. Arceus, you from your perch up in a tree trying to ambush a deer, that's what you see rolling

[00:09:58] up to you on a cart. There's a... Clangity clang, clangity clang. Clangity clang. Clangity clang. An elf druid. And, uh... Oh. Sorry. A pebble. A half-orc fighter. That are just rolling down the goat track with a cart and a donkey. Yep. Really real stealthy. Oh, yeah. What happened to Princess Sparkle the second? Oh, shit.

[00:10:29] No, um... Um... How are we gonna do this? They... When... They had to go do something. They're wrong. No, I mean, you guys are looking around and you don't see her. She was with you. Oh, shit. Okay, oh. Oh. Hold on. Oh, no. We lost a horse. An entire... Hey, guys. How do you lose this? How do you lose this? How would y'all lose a horse? Not just a horse. A person, too.

[00:10:59] The owner of the horse. We lost Ethan Toe. Oh, shit. Oh, god. Um... It is what it is. It is what it is. It is what it is. It is what it is. Man, it's sad. I mean, you could backtrack and try to find Ethan, but... They're back there. They're back there. They're back there. At this point, you don't even know how long ago Ethan disappeared. Well. It might have been an hour ago. It might have been this morning.

[00:11:28] You guys don't even remember the last time you saw Ethan. I remember drinking with him and then... No, no, no. You never hear. This whole Ethan thing was just a figment of your imagination. Yeah. This whole Ethan thing was a figment of your imagination. There was never any Ethan. Ethan went out scouting. Oh, shit. And, uh... They got him. Didn't return. Now... They got him.

[00:11:52] You see and hear the shenanigans of these three chaotic... The Chaos Goblins. Yeah. Chaos Goblins. As they are struggling up the path, trying to make haste, and actually moving pretty quick. I'm pushing. I'm pushing. How far behind is Ebon now? Now, if we're... If we're... If we're making good time, what about him? Oh, he's still in eyesight. He's not far behind. That's... Okay.

[00:12:21] I just wanted to make... Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. If you guys get to the town without him, you don't get paid. Yeah, but he's the one paying us. Exactly. That's what I mean. We need him to get paid. He has the cart with all the stuff in it that you need to get to the town. We need him to be there to get paid. Which is why I should be the one pulling the cart instead. I can, like, just start pushing. I can, like, pull it, like... I can start pulling it like this so he doesn't suspect. I'm gonna look in it because I'm not going to. Just push it. What is looking in? Like, is he still in eyesight of, like, a good person or, like... One of us.

[00:12:50] He's just a little bit behind you on the trail. He's not... He's probably, what, like, five, ten feet behind us, not that far. I think we take... Let's take a couple seconds to just let him catch up. Five, ten feet, not that far, so he's, like, that-ish. He's lagging a little bit, like, maybe 30 feet behind. Alright, let's give him a couple seconds to catch up. That's not too bad. Let's give him a couple seconds to catch up. Well, there may be a quiet clangy clang clang. There was a couple of...

[00:13:17] Mark's just gonna be looking down, seeing us just like, what are those idiots doing standing there in the middle of the place? You're just kidding! I'm gonna pull up my back! So are you guys going to, uh... You got a plan? I think we're just gonna wait for, uh... You wanna do that. Okay, what do you wanna do? Well, he's not that far behind us, I'd say we should keep going. Yeah, but like... What if, what if... I kinda wanna be paid. Everything's still quiet other than the fact, other than his armor, everything is still

[00:13:46] dead quiet. Yeah, but we thought Ethan was, like, right there and they're gone. Yeah, but we... We can forget about Ethan because we need to... If we don't live, then there's no hope he did. Yeah, but, like, the whole purpose is kinda to be weak, you know? We kinda need to get paid. To point A to point B. You said Ethan. Who are we talking about? Evan. Okay, we're talking about Evan. Okay. We kinda wanna get paid. I mean, it's your call, I suppose. Then... Why is it his call?

[00:14:15] Cuz I don't... Cuz I'm the one who noticed if I can stand silent. You're the one making the sounds! You're the one making the sounds! I... Just pebble him. I can go back and start pulling the cart for him instead just to take over a bit of it. The donkey is pulling the cart. I thought... You said that he was. No, he's driving the cart. Okay, I can drive the cart. I can just sit there then. Help the donkey. Sparrow, the rope's just like this.

[00:14:46] Okay. No, um, then yeah, we can wait for him to... Yeah. Yeah. We can just wait for him to catch up a little bit so he's not lagging too far behind. Give him like 10 feet. 10 feet. 10 feet. You know that's like 2 seconds, right? 10 feet's like 2 seconds. He'll be there in like 2 seconds. Perfect. Take a breather quickly. Take a breather quickly. He'll be there in like 2 seconds. How far were those, uh, uh, draconic creatures? So, you said that...

[00:15:15] I mean the two, the ones that you two lost sight of? We missed it. That you two lost sight of? Yeah, we missed it, but um... Should I make another check to see how far away they are? Well, somebody could... Because I'm the only one who's seen them so far? Or that I'm the only one who has an off sight of him? He's like, yeah, you should probably do that. Okay. He's like, yeah, you should probably do that. He's just rolling around in the forest. He should not have done that. Okay, well shut up.

[00:15:42] Sparrow, he's just gonna be rolling around in the forest, hiding behind the trees that aren't in his eyes. Well, it was the best option. What do you mean? I shouldn't have done that. It's the best option. I got a 6, but that's not the point. Pretend to be a wrong roll. 6 and then you get flossed. We never see one get it. That's not the point. The best option was that I did that. Okay, yeah. Let's go. Okay, pretend to be a rock. Okay. So these are the shenanigans that you're witnessing from up in your tree. Yup. I'm like, shit, where'd they go?

[00:16:13] Because of my... I'm probably just like, shit, where'd they go? And they move on past. They are leaving your line of sight. What do you... Roll up. I'll follow them. You're great. Do you follow right away, or do you wait until they've got a little bit of a lead so you don't get caught? I wait. I'm like, a little bit of lead, like in between... Also, plus, I technically have each blind silently above them. I roll lines through like, us, you, Ebon, or is that what you're doing?

[00:16:43] Are you doing like, us, you, Ebon? Sure. Like you're in between us. Evan's different. You're like 15 feet behind us, 15 in front of him, but in the air. Sure. I'm just rolling ahead. So then I need you to give me a perception check. Oh, because she has a 10. I didn't have that. Nice. What was that? It's like a 10, man. You're blind? That is a 16. So... I am blind. Unnatural 20. 30, 20. Yeah. 30, 20.

[00:17:13] I like that. Unnatural. Unnatural. Because it wasn't. It wasn't. Unnatural. That's just what I call them. Okay. Alright, I like it. I like it. Okay. So as you're waiting to give them a bit of a lead, because you're a little curious, you see coming through the brush following them, I need to just do a flip. So you spot, but you hear others. Three. Aww.

[00:17:41] They look like corrupted dragonborn. No. Three. They're not true dragonborn. They have wings, but they're crawling along the ground. They're moving very quickly. And it looks like they're probably going to overtake the others pretty soon. And we're all just oblivious. And I lost sight of them too. Some flowers. It sucks.

[00:18:12] Mmm. Delicious flowers. I mean, wait. Technically, I could decide to be the first ever thing that they hear. So yeah. So what? I kind of want to do that. Okay. Good. Oh, let's see. Even though I don't see them? Animals! Even though I don't see them anymore, do I still like feel like something's off because of like the silence? No, you rolled rather poorly. Look guys, animals were fine.

[00:18:42] Y'all didn't even hear the deer I was initially haunting. No, it ran off because of him. It ran off because of clink, clink, clinky, clink. It ran off because of him. That's all you can hear. That's all you can hear now. That's it. That's why. Yeah, we never can. He's also singing the sneak song. Sneaking, sneaking through the woods. He's like, guys, I'm sneaking so well, right? Guys, he's not even whispering. He's like, guys, I'm sneaking so well, right? Trust guys.

[00:19:11] But doing that in armor. Cling, clink, clink, clink. Y'all just hear a sudden... See you guys? Animals! We're fine. We're fine. Fuck off. From above you. We're fine, guys. It sounds like an owl. Sounds like an owl. In the afternoon. It sounds like an owl when it's not dark out. Yeah, we're fine. It's been like, what? A few minutes? Since... We're fine.

[00:19:40] Since we started moving again. So yeah, it's not dark yet. We're fine. What are your passive perceptions? Oh. Maybe don't remove the weapons. Are you flying overhead? I don't have one. I don't have one written down. So it's 10 plus your wisdom bonus. 11. And if you have... 11. 10 plus your wisdom bonus. So yeah, 11. Okay.

[00:20:10] So half of us are blind. I'm blind as a Batman. I'm a Batman. Well, you guys do do the hooting. See you guys? Average owls. We're fine. Not owls! The 11's at the table are looking around through the trees thinking that there's an owl. Um, you think to look up. Oh. Oh. They also think to look up. And you spot a... Go ahead and describe your character. What do you look like to... What do you look like to... Farrow here?

[00:20:41] We got a bird video. This is... Snowy owl. Like... Oh god. Are you an actual person? Or like... Are you an owl owl? She's an owl. Which is a humanoid owl. So very large and like... She has a big, like, human-sized owl up there. You're just like, huh? Well, um... That's a... That's a big owl. Don't poop on me. Oh my god.

[00:21:10] Well, um... Okay then. Harriet. I'm gonna just say I'm looking in the direction of the things that are pursuing them. By the way. Can I look at them? And then look back? See what they're looking at? You can make an active perception check. Mm-hmm. This is... This is the white dust, right? No. Try and keep on some blank.

[00:21:40] 18... Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. 22. Okay. She sees. You can see. From the ground, you cannot see any creatures. You can however see trees moving through the brush. Do I hear any of that? You do. Mmm! That's what sucks. Okay. God damn it. So, um, guys, I'm gonna... There's kind of a hissing, growling noise. And there is the sound of something rather large. I don't know.

[00:22:10] Kind of lumbering through the woods. You're welcome! A lot of breaking branches and... I told you guys. Animals. We're fun. Crashing into trees and... Yeah. What animal in your right mind does that? Must be a bear with a snake on it. Okay. I'm gonna just pull it inside quickly. No, we're still gonna continue. Um, so... There's a giant white owl thing hybrid... Whatever the creature... Oh! There. Like right there.

[00:22:38] And there's also like a lot of like... Sounds, weird sounds of large animals or creatures. Like right there. And the trees are moving. Must be a wildlife. In the direction that the owl thing's moving at. In the direction that the owl's looking at. So I'm gonna guess there's danger that way, guys. Must be a wildlife. It might be, but... Oh my gosh, shut up. It might be, but like... It might be dangerous one. Alright. So you want to answer intelligence score? Yeah. 11. Go ahead and mark that down to 8.

[00:23:09] To be fair, it's the same over here. No, it's fine. To be fair, it's the same over here. So, um... We have two options. One, we hurry. Or two, we hurry. So, um... So I think we hurry. And you gotta... Keep your friend that's behind you. And yeah, we gotta be him. Option C, we have to make them go faster. Can I tell... You pretty much gotta get... Find black ass and start moving faster. Yeah, Evan. E-B-E-N. Okay. Can I tell Evan? Uh, tell him what? That there's a giant, like... Where are you?

[00:23:39] ...owl there who's looking at danger, which is right over there. What you think is danger? Yeah, it's not danger, it's what you think. I... Oh, fuck butt. Yeah, I fucking see him there. I'm going as fast as I can. My fine black ass is exhausted. Isn't that my fine black ass? It is fine black ass. Yes, it is. Okay, um... Okay. Can I switch into an animal to make this go faster? Well, like start pulling it with him? You could. Just... Bear! I'll put donkey up.

[00:24:08] Ride like the wind bullseye! Oh my god, how many animals? I don't remember the animals. There's bear, wolf, and eagle. What? How I know that is because we have a farm here. She can't fly until level eight. And I can't swim. Can't swim until level four. Okay, so... Return to a donkey. So you could do... You could do brown bear, you could do black bear, you could do dire wolf. Uh, are you a circle of the moon druid? I think she said. I think so. I think she's been a dire wolf before.

[00:24:38] Well, no, no, I... It just... The creature rating matters. Um, I'm pretty sure you're a circle of the moon druid. I think she's actually been a dire wolf. Um, so yeah, dire wolf, uh, brown bear, uh, you can do standard wolf, dog, cat, uh, you can do... No, that's my favorite. A cat. A cat, a cat, a jaguar... Um... As you scare my fine black ass. Okay, so I'm thinking that that cart is going to be heavy if that donkey is as tired as it is.

[00:25:07] Oh, you can do a horse. Ah. Yeah, okay, so... Yeah, a horse. Probably a horse. Yeah, so you're going to take the time to, uh, stop the group. Oh, take the time. Fuck. We're going to have to unhook the donkey, turn into a horse, have them hook the cart up to you so that you can pull it for, what, two hours? Mm-hmm. No, sorry, an hour. I thought that we'd just hook her up to it too. Like, as well. We don't have a second thing. Oh, great. Can we just, like, do this while moving? Sorry.

[00:25:37] Can we push it? Can we push it? Okay, I mean, it's just a cart. They're not... Yeah, but he doesn't want us looking at it and somebody will want to get curious and take a peek. Me. Alright. So no, we're not pushing it. We push it. No, we're not pushing it. Uh, can I... Am I able to make a distraction? Like, turn into a quick creature and lead them away? A cheetah. You could try. Cheetah's probably your best. Okay, so it's either I help... Cheetah or Jaguar, I'd say. Donkey.

[00:26:04] Either we take the time to unhook fine black ass and hook you up. Yeah. Or you start distracting whatever you think is dangerous. Which can very well be lethally dangerous. And I could, uh... Guys, we... Guys, guys. I'm gonna ask what, um... You guys forgot about something. What? We have an owl. We don't know that owl. We don't know! Let's hear it again. Can I ask? We're trying to bribe it. We're trying to bribe them. We'll try and bribe them. Hi! Can I ask? Like, hey look up here.

[00:26:34] What help? Hi! What would think is the best option? Course of action? Let's try and bribe them. So they'll get coming. Well, you could try to lay a false trail and lead them away. Or... Like a use. We can, uh... Try to do something to, uh, to help my fine black ass out. Um... Make them, uh, energized. You know, energize it. You know, energize it. Heal it. You know, something to help it just get along better. Okay. Make it a pot of coffee.

[00:27:03] I don't... Heaven, how your voice has changed. Oh, fuck! Fuck! Like, Jesus fucking Christ! All we can do is like, do our best to get the donkey fucking going right. Okay. Okay. Um... So what, are you gonna tell him or...? I'll just, I'll just... Are you just gonna speculate into the wind or are you gonna tell him? I'm going to tap the donkey. Where? Just on the back. Okay.

[00:27:33] You're gonna, you're gonna slap the fine black ass on the fine black ass? I'm not sure why not. Name fine black ass. Go my fine black ass! Whack! And I'll heal it. Okay. Oh, it's gonna be below. So you're going to expend some of your healing to reinvigorate the donkey. Yes. Okay. It thinks that you're making a sexual advance and it does in fact work.

[00:27:57] The donkey is, uh, very, very concerned about your attention and as a result... Especially because he's your donkey. Well... Especially because he's your donkey. Go! Okay. A crisis averted. Oh my god. You're welcome. Uh, so what are you guys doing about this owl that's just kinda circling above you?

[00:28:26] It's still following us as we're running? It depends on if she's still following us. We have two options. As we're running. Is she still following you? Yeah. Alright, we can either A, throw pebbles at it. I wanna watch. This is entertaining. I'll jump at her. I'll jump at her. I'll jump at her. Way less boring than just sitting waiting for a deer in woods that don't have any air right at all. We can either A, throw pebble at it. No, no, no. Thanks, smart. We either... It's either friendly or it's not friendly. No, we throw pebble at it. Okay. And I'll learn it to go. That one.

[00:28:56] That's what I'm thinking. What we think is a potential threat. Shh. No, it was threat. It was not. There's no... We know that. We know that for weeks, but we don't know that. Think about it. We know that we don't. So, it's either dangerous, it's friendly or it's not friendly. I'm thinking it's friendly because it spotted whatever that was. And I think we should like try and communicate or like call it down. This is the first time you've ever been kind. Yeah. And a second. Okay, anyway.

[00:29:28] So, I'm thinking it's friendly and I... Keep it my way. What? Wait, I don't know what it is. I think you did. Saw it right there. Okay, I saw it and... Okay, anyway. So, I think we either call it down and try and introduce ourselves and see what they're up to. Tell them what... Yeah. It's there for a reason. It's there. Because it's the only...

[00:29:57] It's the only animal. Everything y'all have seen. It's the... We've only seen our big white owl and their... Oh, fine black. And it's not a normal owl. It's a big snow owl. It's a big white owl in the sky. It's a big snow owl with arms. With arms yeah, with arms yeah. As it strangled all of us. like eight arms what? we should have you for a second holy shit

[00:30:27] spider egg spider owl I guess for calling it down I got you are you good with animals? no it's you I think yeah you're probably our best she's not an animal you're a ranger you have animal animals he's half hork he's half rock rocks are animals too rocks have feelings too

[00:30:56] you're elf you're part fey which are animals hey this is a nice shiny rock we got him we got arceus is that left I think I've got a pokemon I'm saying you can try it as like a handle animal or something like that she might take offense to it we try friendly normal interaction first okay so I think we call it down normally okay so

[00:31:26] you're good with people now I am great with people he's a people guy remember you're the animal one he always called them I am the highest okay so yeah okay so we need you to kindly calmly safely call them down we know that's a human it's not arms no owl has human no owl has human arms human is a race arceus fine I got you hey come here hey what's up

[00:31:55] oh my god hey what's gonna want me friends come on what up my five feathered friends we wanna talk to you come here oh my god now because of that do you wanna come down it's pretty much do you wanna come down I'm not landing oh no you don't need to land you just come closer just like just be gonna hurt you wait wait wait come closer we can't hurt you I will get closer though it works hold on

[00:32:25] it worked it semi worked just a little bit it have worked they are closer okay let's go we don't do that way to go way to go we would like to negotiate with you what you're talking to her now and you're looking right at her hey guys we wanna we wanna negotiate with you owl lady looking right at him wait are you a dude or

[00:32:57] nah ark is what's your name I'm a 2 foot 4 I'm a 2 foot 4 nice guys I learned its name they weren't even paying attention I learned its name okay we got ark female or male no idea friendly or not friendly no useful or non useful hopefully useful

[00:33:27] it's like it's like me taking you for a walk and saying how useful is ark is do we really need to keep him around it's like that hey I talk to the people I am still somewhat useful sometimes sometimes and I help kill the vampire spawn I was gonna say remember that time that you fought a vampire spawn and you almost all died besides me ours helpful you just stood there I was helpful you gotta admit okay um

[00:33:56] can we thank them for the warning and hope that goes well so you can talk to her you can talk to her you don't need to ask him people person go thank you for helping us thank you for the assistance five words thank you for helping us five words thank you for the assistance may we ask what you need oh my god we called her down what do you mean what do you need

[00:34:26] there was a reason you're following this is why we don't have common sense at the table oh my god we called her down why are you following us we boredom we called her down and saying hey what you want boredom it's like get over here hey what you want or entertainment okay alright I have an idea none of us can fly really well no you can't fly for another couple levels alright

[00:34:56] why don't we have a flying person for levels that we will not reach why don't we have a flying person with us did you ask that I negotiated with you guys first yeah but if we wanted as she's like two feet above us just like staying there she's like what the fuck are you talking about do we want them in our party but it's the fact that she wants to join instead of negotiating are they even friendly no idea maybe she's a Nazi

[00:35:26] you don't know oh my god are you a Nazi good maybe we should find that out first if they're safe alright are you are you friendly no get the fuck out of here sure okay yes or no sure okay yes or no for now what do you mean for now good enough will you hurt us

[00:35:55] yes or no maybe later I don't know I just met you five seconds ago I need a blood pact with you that you're never going to hurt me yeah good enough you want to join us okay sure we trust them for now because they spotted danger that's my opinion alright for now keyword for now I already invited them in for you keyword is for now he's already invited them in it doesn't matter okay whatever you don't get them out okay

[00:36:24] you both don't get a vote how long have you been watching us please tell me this is while we're moving yes actually no what fuck you guys stopped to have this whole conversation oh my god because you're paused let's walk and talk who pauses to look up you did you're the one who saw her I didn't stop I want to stop let's stop let's walk and talk let's do walk and talk you called us over and we're like look

[00:36:56] oh my god let's continue walking alright let's walk wait so how long have I been watching you guys can I roll an episode Evan Evan Evan is definitely going to be probably ahead of us at this point oh yeah he's still moving along the trail I feel like he's ahead of us I feel like he's quite a bit ahead of you guys can I roll an investigation check to see if anything near us to see if you notice what anything near us stand still for like 10 minutes yeah yeah if you want to take the time to stand there and do that yeah

[00:37:26] start moving don't stop like can I like interrupt his roll and just like stop don't stand still come on we have everything that's a bad one does does you uh you start you step off the path just a little bit start looking through the brush to see if there's any sign of passage of uh animals or other creatures or and what have you and uh as you come up to a a berry bush that looks like it's got some

[00:37:55] some ripe raspberries on it um you don't you notice at uh just at the bottom there a foot ah there's not there's no means to someone foot a leg and attached to that leg the lizard-like torso that is currently swinging a sword oh and why hello there uh please could I I really should have I really wanted to interrupt his roll 19 oh my god uh

[00:38:24] so that's also I you're not with us really you're still in the air I may have been watching to answer your question I may have been watching y'all since you interrupted my hunt with your loud not so stealthy sneaking and also I'm just there to go so you see me fly also oh no oh no when y'all alerted me to those things wait what are you looking for oh okay so you all watch as you all just

[00:38:54] hear me ah yeah yeah that thing right there this guy bro alright not even a full screen Arceus you take four points oh that's not of slashing damage oh that's not as he brings his sword down on your forearm ow yeah um and he uh he makes a call out a braying noise and you hear five other calls Arceus off in the distance why did it have to be a berry bush aware

[00:39:24] of where you are now dang so yeah those things that's what I tried to warn y'all about subtly there's that I love how you're trying to converse with us if we didn't his ass beat if we didn't no they would have been right behind us so we would have been jumped they would have they would have jumped us so Arceus go ahead and roll the initiative okay just him uh yeah cause it's he's off the path he's currently by himself he's off the path on a berry

[00:39:54] with a berry bush that was a nat 20 holy fuck that was a nat 20 what's your dex oh shit no two 22 22 rock paper scissors oh yes rock paper scissors okay um I hope so first I would like to uh call over my amigos amigos I appear to have amigos amigos I appear to have

[00:40:23] been striked I appear to have gotten myself into a pickle I appear to have been struck in my arm by this sword I appear to have gotten myself into a pickle can you require assistance ah amigos I thought I found a bacon tree but it turns out it was just a ham bush I don't know I like that I like that I don't know about that um so I'm gonna call you over and um amigos uh I don't know how close they are I wanna kill them for this guy first because

[00:40:52] he's right there he's in front of you he's right there uh I'm pointing out the calls yeah there were five more no he did did we I wanna assume we did you did hear calls you don't know how many okay I'm just saying I'm gonna slash him he heard that one with my um but we at least I don't wanna slash him with a rapier no I'm gonna stab him nevermind I was about to what are you gonna it's a stabby weapon oh yes bonk well there is an edge to it but it gives me like a hundred like little cuts

[00:41:21] okay I'm gonna stab him yeah that's fair I'm gonna slash him with a serrated knife it's like give me your attack roll oh lord what is that sixteen what I have plus two and that's a fourteen sixteen will hit yeah did you still call us over are we on the way over there I did call you guys over okay we're on the way over slowly but surely d8 maybe probably slowly oh wait shit what about what the fuck about

[00:41:52] I think somebody should watch that guy he's still moving okay good he's still moving three damage three damage yep where did my marker go uh the guy with the guy with the donkey I saw it I saw it where did I see it that's Evan Evan E-B-E-E-M marker marker whiteboard marker there was a whiteboard marker no yeah I think you have it I think you have it I thought I did too but it doesn't appear to be here it doesn't work that doesn't work it doesn't work I'm gonna say you threw that down there

[00:42:22] because it doesn't work well um I don't have a whiteboard well Arceus just didn't need the markers we kinda need them yeah you kinda ate the marker man why didn't you oh good okay it was behind my plate but it was with you it was but not behind the screen okay not the little hidey okay okay sorry so you uh three damage three damage

[00:42:51] you rolled one I rolled a one oh my come on just like an you like you like barely punctured skin to do three this is you no I poked he's like guys I was a little distracted as the guy stabbed me in my arm he didn't stab you but I slashed you as he slashed me in my arm I was a little distracted he didn't even really slash you he just like he like turned the sword he bonked me okay that's what you're doing

[00:43:21] that's it well I've called them over and I'm gonna stab you gave him a really nasty paper cut you stabbed at him and you like clipped just the edge of his ear how'd that feel unpleasant jeez am I good to go now yeah he's gonna follow that up oh shit oh god I love that

[00:43:51] what is that he knows he hits is that a nat 20 is that a nat 20 that's a nat oh shit well Arceus it was good knowing you kind of we'll leave that we'll leave them it's okay this is just a little one he's only about a foot taller than Arceus my face is he doesn't do that much damage he's a little more okay so uh yeah a little one a little one we knew there was a little one six feet tall so as you

[00:44:21] come in and clipped his ear with your thrust you grabbed your wrist and pulls you into his short sword ow teddy bear teddy bear I got it I got it yeah you're just gonna like take damage on the way through and just like clock him in the teeth and clock him in the teeth how'd that feel so that'll be 12 points of piercing damage as he rams that through the armor of your shoulder

[00:44:52] ouch um two I'm at 21 and then wow my max HP he's not he didn't know I've rolled another oh no I didn't roll another he rolled 17 though that hits dang it it does wait hold on it's on the number yeah it's on the number on the number or higher

[00:45:23] uh so then he um of course he's lucky he releases his knife takes a step back and plants his foot in the middle of your chest and kicks you back did he just spartan kick me he just spartan kicked you give me a strength saving throw I'm horrible with strength I'm good with it you better 10

[00:45:52] my friend you land on your back pro 10 feet away uh you take 3 points you take 3 points of bludgeon damage I went from 37 to 19 HP in one turn which I two turns and then he roars at you a promise of violence to come uh I deeply regret my decisions I understand you deeply regret like

[00:46:22] insulting him it's like how'd that feel okay but that's it for his turn um have we made it over yet are you guys he did call out to you I assumed we were moving over to him so go ahead and roll your initiative you guys watch as I was right you watch as I fly backwards it's Spiral Onyx that was right you watch as I fly backwards towards you guys I still moved second but that doesn't matter um 16 should I stay in the air

[00:46:52] and watch the cart so y'all don't lose it that's not bad oh that's what I roll base they're over here now you didn't choose to come with us he called on for us stay with him love him give him Sam yeah what Evan Evan no Evan oh Evan Evan was already ahead of us he's still going he doesn't know what's happening

[00:47:21] right now aren't you with Evan I'm in the air right now watching Evan she was she was in the air right there with it I was able to see I was able to see you guys I thought they were within my fault man this one day from looking around the only time I'm actually good at looking around oh it's too late well so now you guys watch they fly backwards right into my back I told you so your initiative was yours

[00:47:51] 14 yours oh you went with us okay well no I just want to know when I need to be asking her what she's doing that's a one oh okay so dead last that doesn't matter as you watch a spear fly so then technically it's just three but you have at least two I think so then Onyx you're up you're not there yet you can spend this round moving towards

[00:48:21] where you think think you just saw the general direction of the noise yep but you should arrive there next round okay I'll do that live Arceus live sparrow I'll do I'll do I'll do I'll do you're a party member that helps you oh god damn why not ask me I'm all I want to blind I want to perceive things

[00:48:54] I should not perceive things okay you're good alright so you will also be there next round Arceus what are you doing I'm going slightly higher in the air and that way so I'm kind of visible in case they need to see where I am but I am following us or not okay I'm trailing behind Evan yeah Kate give me a perception

[00:49:24] check oh my god as you suddenly lose them because of tree it's like an eagle if they don't see them anymore they're gone okay alright you you can see you see that Arceus is fighting for his life I guess as well as he is able well that's exactly what I was trying to warn them as much as he's able which he's not very able hey hey

[00:49:54] I've had my moments keywords had had okay but that takes us back top of the round Arceus alright I guess I'm spending half my turn getting up half your movement sorry half my movement getting up okay well then you're 10 feet away from this thing are you gonna take the fight back to him or are you turning tail and running like a little bitch run like a little bitch it's safer

[00:50:23] even though there's five more because I heard five more calls I know I'm definitely not taking this fight I mean it's one of them I'm struggling with one and it's small and there's five well I say you say small but it's still taller than me I know I'm also not gonna make it far I've used half my movement on getting up I was gonna say yeah that's true I'm going to try and get as decent far back

[00:50:53] while calling out for the others to please come be a little bit of assistance get over here we're on our way so you stand up and you start backing away guys help I'm not like that whoa whoa whoa don't be masculine come on he's accurate and never help these things go thank you guys help me thank you I suck at this thank you much better he's like better sounding more

[00:51:24] menacing but like guys help me I'm scared thank you thank you much better I'm still going to try and keep my eyes on him in case he tries to attack me I don't really want to deal with a surprise attack but there could be one behind you he heard five more calls but stop well the only thing that are behind me currently that I know are those people we're not behind you we're just coming in the direction direction you could be yes we could be coming to the

[00:51:54] side of you no you're coming behind me because I walked away you walked away to the side yes I would back onto the trail no I went a little bit a different way so we were coming from your side because I was still looking the trail still behind me and he kicked me towards the trail I just said that and you said no I moved further than 10 feet that's why you guys haven't been able to get to me in one

[00:52:24] turn okay so Arceus you're off in the brush we'll say over here you guys wouldn't have been able to catch me in one turn we're making our way that's not that's not 30 feet away but we're making our way over that okay I've been fighting this lizard dude he's 10 feet

[00:53:06] the fact the fact of us despite one being skinny one being very rocky looking we're both like 7 8 ish you're like 710 I'm like 78 I'm gonna say I know she's tall and I'm confident like 510 he got up I'm working that out right now oh yeah yeah yeah yeah where did the box go of my miniatures the box right here is it that one yes that one right there

[00:53:41] is that you trying to prove me wrong as suddenly 5 more appear don't say that we know we're already losing evans so I don't want to hear I'm already losing my life cool evans life is more important with the with the severity of his voice when he wanted us to get this to this place my bad my bad your life is not as important as this thing because if this thing is world ending your life being ended is not world ending you watch me as I just vanish bro I quit they'll

[00:54:11] left the game so it'll be heaven right up there so then you're probably roughly in between roughly in between okay all right his turn oh shit okay well we only made it back 15 feet and his movement speed is 30 he's 50 10 so he still has

[00:54:40] a net of 5 feet left that he can move so he's going to cover the distance hi there how are you he's going to step up and draw his others how many swords do you have enough it's like this guy boxed at his sword yeah he just starts trying to fill you out like a box sword he's just waving us all over again

[00:55:10] he's just using short swords right so he's got all space in the world for them like this jacquavious part two that's how i'm gonna die jacquavious part two we're back in the circus okay he rolled a 17 that's gonna hit you goodness gracious accurate he hasn't missed and that's gonna be for seven points of slashing damage so you take a pretty savage cut to your

[00:55:39] thigh followed by actually no he goes to take a chop

[00:56:17] he wants to my shield at his sword to block his sword yes well not actually because then he has to go grab his shield it deflected back to captain boomerang hammer and it's ice damn you should have

[00:56:47] named it sword yes sword the hammer I'm gonna hit him with my sword dude that's a hammer and no this is a knife no this is a knife no that's a spoon why see that's a spoon that's knife this is a knife that's a spoon that's old Simpsons right old

[00:57:16] Simpsons this turn technically one time whenever he's on kicking his ass onyx is up okay so you charge into this small clearing there and you see Arceus getting his ass beat suffering from a bit of a beat down they're jumping me guys I'll just cheer him on back you got this as I start dying faster this winged dragon like lizard creature does he

[00:57:46] notice me right away he's in the middle of a fight he notices you but he disregards you for the moment I'll turn to a rogue real quick he's not the sand that would fall on us right we have no clue go from behind give us both advantage we don't know what those things were behind us how good are you at recognizing the difference between species that you're barely seen that would be a check so they look

[00:58:15] pretty similar but it could be like if somebody's never never seen a black lab before how all black labs look very similar oh fuck if you own a black lab you can tell yours out of the crowd but they do know a lot of life we don't own these dragon more things we don't own them he's got a santa's beard as we call it well shit tradora has a little white patch just

[00:58:45] under her chin but that is her only white spot I don't even know what weapon I have out right now from when we were walking hi well I think the puppy heard her name she did no she heard I'm gonna probably say I have my back legs out honestly yeah I think I'm gonna say I have my back legs out I'm not sure what I had out right now because we were just walking I'm assuming I was keeping myself arms and having to like pull anything out

[00:59:15] assuming assuming well I'm not gonna say I have my strongest one right with me all the time like I have it on me but I'm not gonna say I've been strong all the time because as I pull out a butter knife size of his thumb prepare to feel the wrath of my butter knife exactly thumb it'd be the size of his thumb would I get advantage if I go to attack him in wait no

[00:59:44] he's nevermind I'm not behind him I forgot no he's facing he's facing towards us go around him and stab him in the back he's facing well the thing is facing us yeah but like is he he's seen me he's with him but he's also noticed me so it's not like I'm going in completely it's not like he's getting attacked completely blind he's seen me walk behind him and stab him anyways yeah

[01:00:14] I don't want to die how much movement would that take just to get around him because I'm there now like I'm there I'm seeing it but I still have to walk around him or like get around him walks around not enough so what like kind of like side close to like diagonal to his back okay I'll go like well I can't miss if I'm going for his back

[01:00:44] I can't miss and like jab my axe to the side of his head and hit him I'm going to him with over casually we take a pause for a second

[01:01:14] in the fight I'm going to swing my battle axe at him okay give me your attack oh great game his head boom he has the most intense neck hair flip ever 10 is not gonna cut it he does a hair flip under it a hair flip under it a lizard yep

[01:01:45] yeah that's your action you do still have a bonus action I was gonna say I'm thinking I'm trying to remember what I got you're using your battle axe two handed yes so you can't make an offhand weapon attack but you could make I could like swing and because you're a monk yes yes so you could you could make a kick I'm just saying fire oh shit I missed kick him you kick him like I'd actually be off and I'd like kick him you kick him like that are you in the

[01:02:15] sword me or did you back up no no you blocked the sword very bonus I blocked this he's gonna kick him into me oh next if you kick him his sword into me I'm gonna be upset he kicks his arm in the sword 17 that'll do

[01:02:45] he kicks his arm into me okay because of where I am I feel like I'd kick him like kind of like I feel like I'd kind of kick him like this to where he'd be over here and like kind of like that. Well, he gets to make his strength save. Well, yeah, if it works it'd be kind of like that. As you watch him tank it. He's just like what the fuck was that, bro? He does not tank it. Oh. Shit. So you can go ahead and roll your damage die four plus your strength. Okay. Get it, Pebble. Good job, Pebbles.

[01:03:14] I can kick you too. You can. You won't. Fireball. Fireball has them right there. Seven. Seven? Seven. Okay. I kicked him for seven by the way. That's more than I get when I'm poking him. Yeah. Paper cut. I kicked him for more than his paper cut and he bled from the paper cut. He ain't bleeding from this. He always said he's trying to lose from everything. Internal. Oh yeah, internal. I'll make him start bleeding internally.

[01:03:44] He's like you hammered him right in the hip and it sent him sprawling on the ground. When he gets up he's kind of limping a bit. That said the rest of him still looks menacing. Oh god. I'm not going to taunt him like this fucker. I didn't. How'd that feel? Ah! I'm not going to do that. I don't know. I think it's just a few weeks of rehab. Yes, the alcoholic of the group

[01:04:14] waiting for the others to show up and he just Oh no, if you get like a serious injury then you can go to rehabilitation. Yeah. He gets time off. Paid time off. I guarantee you that anymore any of us took that right away with rehab. I don't want to talk about Aldix. He gets paid time off if he gets too injured. Oh crap. You suddenly see. I see this. I see.

[01:04:44] So I've reached there in your time. You've reached the area yeah because you were with me. You see this tomfoolery. No, you saw me miss my axe and then kick him and he started fumbling back from the kick. Oh my god, I haven't played in forever. I know. And I can't read any of this. Our writing was god awful. The importance of having clear and concise hand writing. No, it's the lighting I promise. My handwriting is fine. It's not your shitty writing. No, it's both. It's my handwriting.

[01:05:14] My handwriting is legible. I just need to define what I'm looking for. I have god awful writing. My writing is shitting but it's mostly the lighting. I have god awful writing and god awful paper. With terrible lighting my words blur. I don't know what to tell you. Which is fucking bad. You don't know how you're wet. I can't even read your, thank you. I couldn't even read your writing. We can see. Sorry Sarah. Warning. You heard her bitching about the poor lighting. No, I'm in the read.

[01:05:43] The lighting is too awful. The lighting's too bad. Turn the light on. Someone flip your ear. I don't know those children. I can kick you and do more than what you can do to me so don't even try. Remember what enemies are? One thing I'd love to try. Doesn't need to be. Scimitar is like a small rapier, yeah? Or a small scythe I mean? No, it is a sword.

[01:06:13] It's a curved sword but it's I don't know, they're pretty swords. Arabic. Arabic's use scimitars. With the gems. With the gems. All you gotta really know is that when you use it, just go off the rolls if you can. That's pretty much all you gotta do right now. If you wanna make it simple and not have to do as much reading. Well, cause I don't know if I'm going to be synaptic. Please understand my ability to art is poor. Oh yeah, I know

[01:06:42] what I thought of. I know what some of that is, yeah. Oh no, I didn't think of that. I was thinking of a... I'm stupid. Oh, okay. Yeah, okay. Okay, I am not a good artist. I'm not a good artist. Pyros must use scimitars. Don't do that. How close is he to magic? Is Arceus gonna catch flames? Depends on how far I catch them. What kind of flames? What are you talking about? Fireball! Flamebolt. You don't have fireball! Flamebolt. Flamebolt. She doesn't have firebolt. Even then, depends on how far I kicked him from RPS. Flamebolt. Depends on how far

[01:07:12] I kicked him from RPS anyway. Okay, so I'm gonna use my... That's what I was looking for. I'll give this. Get mid... Yep. Produce flame. Yeah, that's what you got. You got like fire hand. You got a little fireball, like PK fire. Yeah, pretty much. PK fire! PK fire! What's your PK fire you? Oh, ho, ho. PK, PK, greens!

[01:07:42] Okay, so this flame? Yeah. We can do that. After these messages, we'll be right back. And we're back doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo and we're back doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo and we're back Okay, so I believe next up was Sparrow. What are the chances they see he is with the What are the chances if I hit not Arceus but the lizard man

[01:08:11] would produce flame because the I'm not in the path. The rain is 120 feet and We can do a backup. Just make sure to move the side shot. I think it's within 120 feet I'm not gonna lie. I don't think so. Right, yes. I'm also not in the way. No. Yeah, so can I just hit him with produce flame? Hit him? Roll. Can I just hit him with it?

[01:08:42] You can conjure a flame into your hand and then you can throw that little bolt of fire. That's what it is. It's not gonna do well. Try it. Your attack roll. You've hit decent damage with it before if that's what you're asking. Oh, look. Nine. So, that's nine. Isn't it plus your wisdom or something? Plus your wisdom modifier. Plus your proficiency. I'm just happy I got the stat right to use it. Even though

[01:09:11] I'm not the one using wisdom. Wisdom. Yeah, wisdom plus your proficiency. Your proficiency which is your wisdom modifier not the score. 15? 15? 15 will hit. Oh my god. I can make that. Hold on, so at least 15 because I've hit him at 17 you hit him at 15. 16 also. And I've hit him for three. You have not hit him but you have he hit him for three damage. For three damage not out of three. I've contributed.

[01:09:43] Okay. I still contributed. Yeah, where were they? I don't know. You might have like a sling for it so you can carry it on your back. No. I thought she was talking about the fire. Yeah, the fire. The fire sling. Because if you remember when you're dealing fire damage if you have your staff in hand then you do one point of extra fire damage. Hey. Are you holding it? Hey. If you roll the one then that means that you do double damage. It's like

[01:10:12] it'll do double guys trust me. Do double as it hits me. Okay. I still go out and run it and leave it to die. I cease to exist. Three one hitting an ally. Three one hitting an ally. Triple one hitting an ally. As you watch me just cease to adjust. This. It fades into dust. Eight looks like a diamond. As you watch as it just fades into dust. Found it. Five. Five. Plus one is six. Yay. Okay, so where were you?

[01:10:41] You hit him for less than I kicked him. Like right there. You hit him with fire for less than I kicked him. That's not what I heard. That's my entire that's going to be my entire thing. I can kick them for more than what they can do with swords and fire. Hey. I got a horrible. I got a horrible. Okay, so you hurl your little bullet fire and it does. You stabbed him for three. Fireball. And I kicked him for seven. Vicious muckery. That's not a fireball. Fireball is the third little spell. It's eight die six damage. It's not the same. PK fire. Oh my god. It's essentially

[01:11:11] PK fire. Yeah. Oh god. Okay, so you hurl your little three fire. All three people in the audience are going to get that. Six points of damage. I will mark that down. The three people will be us. All three people in the audience that play Smash Bros are going to get that. The three people just being us. I don't know if Croker plays Smash Bros or not. Actually no, not even Smash Bros. My bad. Not even that. Not even that. It's Earthbound. PK fire came from Earthbound first. It's just going to be us that know it. Or the audience. People who listen to our stuff. If we ever say his name

[01:11:40] it always throws him off. What was his name again? What was his name again? Sorry? No. No, no. Okay. Only I do that. It's like when we talk to Editor Chris through the microphone. I mean, we always say bye to him at the end so it's not like he's not like whatever. So that was Sparrow, Ark, you're up. So you're still partway down the trail. You're trying to

[01:12:09] keep up with Evan. Okay. I need you to give me another perception test. Oh God. Let's see if you can see a tree that's in there. Another 17. Okay. So, everything, you still got eyes on Evan but you catch movement out of the corner of your eye. Which side? Hi puppy. Back with the others. Oh.

[01:12:38] And there's another one sneaking up behind Sparrow. Um, over there! The three of you! There's more! Have fun! yelling at us just like have fun! I suddenly be on their fork. Do you not have a bow with sneak attack? They do have a bow. They have a long bow. Why a long bow for sneak attack? Why not? Right, sorry, when I think sneak attack I think it's right there. As I yell that, I'm gonna ready my bow. I'm gonna dip. Ready it?

[01:13:08] Not even fire it? Not even fire it? You're not gonna ready it fire it? You're just gonna like not on the bow when you draw it. That's why it's not sneak attack. And I'll attempt No. Oh no. Is that a one or a seven? I can't tell. I think that might be a one. You see a critical fail. It may be a one. Please don't hit me. It is a one. Okay, but

[01:13:38] she has advantage so she gets to Roll twice. Roll again. Nobody else was aware of her presence up there besides us. Besides well we know she does. You're also not keeping eyes on her all the time. Does 13 hit on the new one? 13 hit on the new one. What did you roll? 13. 13. You rolled a total of 13. You rolled a 13 or you got a total of 13? Total. Yikes. Okay.

[01:14:08] Okay. Alright. I rolled a 13. No one knows she's there. Hey, look out behind. Well, well, well, well. What do we have here? Yeah, in this case. I'm just going to vanish back into the skies. Well, I mean, you have the height advantage and he doesn't know you're there so you've basically got like double advantage. yeah,

[01:14:38] times two. You, you're just a hair shy but I'm going to give you that on this one. That will count does it hit. She had double advantage. Yes, 13. Double advantage is not actually a thing but she could, if that was a thing then she would have had it. You watch her look. She's in the sky, he doesn't know she's there and she has sights on him. advantage for having the high ground. You watch as her longboat turns into an AWP. Alright, give me your damage. Just mmm.

[01:15:08] You gotta look at what the weapon does. It's like just like what D blank, how many D-blanks it does. Well, a longboat is a die 8, plus she should get her dexterity bonus for damage. So whatever you just roll plus your dexterity bonus. No, this way we all see. Her longboat will roll. Ten. And do you get your sneak attack on that? Sure. Sure! I'll just move slightly behind him to get

[01:15:39] Why don't you use your new book and find out what a rogue's sneak attack is at level three. Level two. And then you drop it. You're a rogue ranger, yes? Yeah. So you have to be two and one two and one yeah. He's like yes I get to use these now already. He's got them I can use them. No, secretly he's like oh fuck I have to read I have to use these already. Tim, what's your opinion on reading?

[01:16:09] He probably doesn't like it. Because he can't do it. I love the D&D handbook. Okay, rogue stealth attack. We're at 10 now. Yeah, sneak attack. Yes. Sneak attack. Sneak attack. It's like where is that? I can't read. Literally Aaron could take a book from me. Could it perhaps be on the other page? It could be. He just is reading it. Very well could be. Sneak attack. I don't have to write anything down. I don't want to use a pencil. It's only giving me

[01:16:39] first level. It's a D6 for first level. Okay, so wouldn't it be still a D6 for second level? Second and third. Because I'm not giving me second level. Give me the book. Give me the damn book. Give me the book you just got. The chart. Sneak attack. Die six, die six, two die six, two die six. So second level rogue is only one die six still. So you're three that you just got put whatever your modifier is.

[01:17:09] So you dealt your ten damage plus roll your sneak attack damage. Is there anything out of the sneak attack? I did, which is three. Okay, so 13 total. Holy fuck. That's not so bad. I mean, I know you're shooting from the sky with a longbow, but like, I should've kicked him for more. The AWP. Oh my god. Okay. I'm all about that. Your foot is not that long. What? My foot

[01:17:41] stronger than her PK fire in the top of the round. Arceus. Arceus. Go. You're up. Go. Huh. Well. Well, that seems to have had to be bad. Since they've mentioned the opponent, do I now notice the opponent behind Sparrow? Oh, yeah, he definitely squealed. He took an arrow, to the middle of his back. It's that spot that you can't reach to scratch. Oh! Sparrow is sticking out of the tail. Sparrow just hears it.

[01:18:10] That one middle of your back that you can't scratch. I mean, I could scratch my entire back, but you know. I could scratch your entire back, too. I think I can. I could scratch your entire back, too, but I was talking about myself, I could scratch my entire back. I'm a back catcher, so I'm good. Oh, I guess I'm going to. Turn to the one guy that's fucking you up or turn to the other guy? I have beat with you, apparently. Alright, I'm going to go fuck him.

[01:18:41] He's going to the one I kicked over. Show him what you got. Alright, I'm going to stab him. Oh, fuck. I'm going to shank that bitch so hard. Go straight to British. I'm sending you to Brazil. Alright. No, he's not. No, I'm not shaking him. I'm not shaking him. I see. I see. I'm not shaking him.

[01:19:11] Okay. What's that, like, seven total? Whenever you have? I'm not doing that. I'm not doing that. He may be on the floor, however, I don't think I'm shaking him. No, he's up, he's just limping. No, he's not okay. No, he's up because I kicked him and he's up and he was limping. That's what he said. It I did say that but he he's limping. So it's my turn again. I take advantage. Can you push my dance?

[01:19:42] That's funny. Better. Eight. For clarification, he said that when it gets out. I rolled a seven, she rolled an eight. Oh, no, sorry, sorry, no, no, wait. He rolled a five. I rolled a five, she rolled a six. It's my dice. Hold on. I didn't test something. I didn't test something. It's just my dice. It's my dice. Maybe it's because of the indents, honestly. Hold on, I'm switching

[01:20:12] dice. Wait, you can have these dice? You said that they were weighted dice. They are the reason. They are weighted. There's some eye dice. Could be very well the reason. I like the eye dice. It's just that we're okay. Well, I guess that's my turn. Wait, wait, wait. I don't know. You guys, you can do a bonus action? No. I can heal? I can heal myself? can you do that? You did that once to reinvigorate Pine Black Ice. I think so, you can do it twice, but I don't know if you want to smack Pine

[01:20:47] when you use one, right? You still it up? Yeah, and then you erase them because it's like how many spell slots you got. Where's your die 20 that's been failing you? Right here. Dice jail! Dice jail! What? Dice jail! Yeah! He can watch from prison. Thank you. Thank jail. Okay. Okay, you're gonna roll the better

[01:21:17] die now? No, I'm already rolled. Okay. Yeah, so if you got anything you can do as a bonus action. I'm able to heal again, aren't I? You're gonna like touch yourself? I don't know, pause. Yes, yes, yes, that's what he was doing. Are you really? I'm gonna touch yourself. You might want to find somewhere a little more private for that. He's gonna go into the bush. He's gonna go into the

[01:21:47] bush that he was kicked away from home. I'm gonna tap my shoulder, give myself some confidence, heal myself. Come on there, bud, get back in the game. Just walk it off. He's in there like a third of his HP. Go get him there, champ. You got this. That's what I do for healing word all the time. He's not his boss.

[01:22:17] D6 no, you lay on hands. You should probably look up how much you heal by laying on hands. Look at your sheep. disheveled sheep. Please don't tell me it's anywhere where one of the ribs are. Oh, it's not even on this one. Thank God. I have a vampire squad. What? Who finds it

[01:22:47] first? He's going to. It be me. Come on Marcus. I have a book. He doesn't know where to look. He does. Marcus, you got this. I have two books. I'm looking at books. I'm sorting through hundreds of pages. You're sorting through half a page. It's pretty much half page at this point. It's crumpled and holding over in it. I think it's kind

[01:23:17] of wounds. have a pool of healing power that replenishes when you take a long rest. With that pool, you can restore a total number of hit points equal to your paladin level times five. You can dice them out however you want. You get to do ten hit points. You can do them all right now or you can feed yourself one at a time or you can give yourself one

[01:24:04] nine to seven points. Touch yourself nine times, buddy. Yeah, seven points. So I'm at 19 HP. Good for you, but I touched myself for nine to seven HP. Are you stupid? You said you could touch yourself for nine health. No, I could. I could. I'm going for seven. I don't know if I need to heal someone else. Because if they drop into the drop

[01:24:34] to zero, and they're making death saves, if he heals them for one point, they're back up and in the fight. That is why I keep someone just in case. Why is he on the ground now? What happened to him? Why is he dead? What happened to him? He's not dead. What happened to him? He was in front of me. He's limping on the ground. He's limping on the ground. He's limping on the ground. He

[01:25:10] fell back over. He helped him back on the ground. pushed him over. Your turn's done? Put soldier one back up. He's spending half of his movement to stand back up. It wasn't me. He knows it's not you. He's going to swing it

[01:25:49] wipe people. Don't do that. That's bad. He's a lizard. Don't do that. Dang it. He pulled out a wash cloth and started wiping it clean. Six points of slashing damage for your shenanigans. Damn. Just because you were fucking around. It's fine. I still have one extra health than I ever did. But he's also going to step here.

[01:26:19] so that he can also take a swing at Sparrow. What are you doing? He's going to take advantage now. What are you doing? Because he's also threatened from the other side so he

[01:26:50] lunges at you with his short sword and you manage to get your staff up in the way for the most part. You do take a pretty nasty gash across your knuckles for two points of damage. My knuckles scrape your knuckles. He scrapes your knuckles. However, now the one that's behind you gets to go. His

[01:27:22] first attack is a terribleness. Oh, fuck. His second attack is not a terribleness. damn. You better get good. So the one striking you with the knuckles hurt just enough that it made you step aside and jump away. Which was exactly when he was swinging down at you causing him to miss. You're going to say something ridiculous somewhere. You twisted the blade and

[01:27:52] scraped it back off. Fuck off bud. There we go. He gets the back of your calf for six

[01:28:22] points. That's a good chunk of skin that just comes off butter. Smooth like butter. Like criminal undercover. You watch as Meryl watches as her back of her cap just comes off like butter. How far away is he? 15 20 feet away from me? The one that I kicked already is 20 feet from me? Is the one that kicked already 20 feet away from me? Oh no I can't my right hock looks about like Minecraft does

[01:28:52] 20 feet I was just making sure You hear the Minecraft said I move over to him I Waddle Waddle Waddle Waddle Why are we all jumping up from this side? Because that's the side I was on I'm not taking 35 feet I can't go 35 Everyone jump them I'm probably going to try the same combo pray the axe hits Take it towards his friends I

[01:29:25] don't think that you're kicking in towards his friends I will let you know that hits yeah she got 15 and I got 13 right but she got double two handed with what that was the battle axe that's the minimum that could be hit

[01:29:55] because 13 was just you're talking battle axe not great axe yep you're right I was going to say I'm da for one hand yeah Sparrow 13 was just shy but she has a two handed and she allowed it so I think it's 14 what is that I'm blind what is that that is 8 point yes I'm going to try to kick him in 12 that's the one that that that's the one that I that

[01:30:26] that that I kicked yeah I just did 8 okay you oh wait I might not have to kick him you step in and that axe that axe sinks deep from shoulder down through its ribcage and embeds itself in his pelvis he's alive he collapses he's gone he's taking the dirt

[01:30:55] now can I just like bend down and swipe some dirt over his face I don't care if I use it something else I just who do you work for who do you work who do you work you scared I can't really do anything else you scared the dinky dog away all right next you scared the dinky dog you

[01:31:25] scared her when you did the me me me she was like what was that what did you okay so that if you're done then that is yeah I'm making it to the other one you're surrounded once by one by corpse the other is alive I mean I'm kind of a sparrow a sparrow slides turning around actually so it's like from the wizard chest slides turns around towards it okay my english sucks I'm a scimitar oh wait would that be a good thing

[01:31:55] to just scimitar is a slashing okay okay actually pokes with it no actually a scimitar is a slashing yes turn around and they're good for slashing I'm going to spin around and try to slash him you just turn around you just you don't even turn yeah you just you just like hey just like your staff is just

[01:32:31] that's plus some of our dexterity correct plus your proficiency plus your dexterity what's your dexterity 12 is not going to cut it okay hilarious absolutely hilarious I am fucking amazing uh okay so your

[01:33:01] attack failed yep anything else no well no everybody gets a bonus action but whether or not she has anything to do with it is a question oh yeah uh she can turn into an animal as a bonus action doesn't that take a turn entirely yeah no it just takes a bonus action and what was the point of the whole walking thing is she to stop and do it yeah because you would have had to stop to unhook the donkey to hook her up

[01:33:31] I thought we were okay okay because you can't do that with the cart moving no we we got we'll find a way also she could turn into an animal but she doesn't have tack or bridle or anything to hook herself up to the uh to the cart with so then you would have to take that off the donkey and put it on her and then go and then she probably wouldn't like all the stuff being on her so that's fair enough what are the chances that this battle

[01:34:01] is going to last an hour not likely right now right right now not likely don't chance anything right now not likely because I turn into a horse and then as soon as we go just like switch it up oh wait no they're ahead and mine thanks for knocking him over you know how dare you right now that could be a good idea but we don't know he's gone though he's gone yeah we don't know Evan's only been like

[01:34:31] healing word which is a spell you can use as a bonus action yeah fucking bitch healed and fucking bitch healed i think that's about it okay so animal or okay and uh depends on what you can do with the animal so one's dead yes there's one there and we still have maybe three more four we don't no no no we don't know we don't know how many he does we don't could be three could be 13 could be 37

[01:35:01] could be an army right so so we don't know how many let's just take it let's just take it at face value and say that there's one I'm still kind of good at health um so oh okay I can fix that no sorry so I'm gonna transform into a wolf or what would you say what's the wolf kind or whatever that you have that's not the regular one yeah that one what's that one better I don't know what's better I don't know the animals

[01:35:31] they're different it's in the back of the book oh actually grizzly bear the last page uh before the here is at that like near the last page I don't want to talk about all this grizzly bear so dire wolf dire wolf or brown bear okay dire wolf yeah brown bear is the same page are you sure dire wolves are ancient extinct wolves yes something like that yeah they're really pretty gum brown I think they're trying to revive them I'd want a pet one no you don't

[01:36:00] yes I would big wolf brown bear paddington bear big paddington bear paddington's older brother you watch the hat just appear stabbington bear stabbington bear that's crazy comes with a knife too that's old call you wouldn't you stabbington bear they come with a knife stab stab oh my god on the character sheet sparrow under that when bear stabbington comes with a nut under the pregame knife

[01:36:30] stab stab are you sure come with marmalade are you sure I wouldn't want to pet one considering I would be like puppy to guess 666 a dire wolf she wants to pet okay I would bear trust I don't know if she can let you pet her when she's a dire wolf no she wants to pet a real life one bear you it didn't because they don't want to pet her because they don't want to pet her we got big wizards no real life okay you don't want to pet her so I do I do yes I do

[01:37:00] I hate teary okay what happened well I mean yeah sparrow okay ark you're up are you a bear now or no should I roll another perception check because I'm still following them yeah actually you should oh that is a 10 plus whatever you have oh my god 14 what a legendary 14 14 okay that'll be enough yay there's a vampire on the floor something like that I don't know what that is I can't tell

[01:37:30] vampire no stop angles are darker what the fuck is that no no excuse me it's like a wyvern a wyvern why do you mean a wyvern a wyvern shut up see that's what I just called it and you're like a wyvern are you sure it's a wyvern it depends on what culture you're talking about are you sure it's a wyvern I don't know okay that's I don't actually have the correct pieces you got wings yes I know I just I didn't know

[01:37:59] what you were trying to make it if you wanted it to be that you don't notice that it looks a lot like the other ones it looks like like a like a corrupted dragonborn almost but this one is specifically black it's larger than the others larger or larger yes fuck and he is sneaking up on the back of the cart oh no I wonder why

[01:38:28] she doesn't know his name either she can't call out to him I wonder why she doesn't know his name he just came you can't call out to him he just came out of the trees so he couldn't see you before because you were up above the canopy so yeah you you have stealth as far as

[01:38:58] long boat with a new one nice back no advantage you are at advantage do it again round two round two nope that's not much better round two fuck double advantage double advantage go she has the high ground don't look I guess we're going to give him a whack whack fuck fuck I wonder why he's why he's trying to steal from the whoa

[01:39:28] do I add my stealth bonus there's a reason why me and Sparrow were laughing that's it that's on a succeeded or a successful attack ball correct onyx just your dexterity and your onyx is there a reason why me and Sparrow were laughing no there's something there's a reason why he was trying to steal from the cart ten hits a new one your shot goes wide and sinks into the seat right beside Evan

[01:39:57] which does actually have the benefit of Evan thank god seeing it thank god and screaming like a little bitch what please do it please can you do it scared the hell out of him can you do it can you do it no I don't want to throw the dogs off well you don't need to do it loud you can just be like thank you and he turns with his staff and he launches a volley of magic missiles at him magic missiles at the guy at the guy you're welcome buddy

[01:40:26] this week he's like who the fuck are you magic missile who the fuck are you thank you but who the fuck are you starts galley gunning it I'm pretty sure this is the first time that they spot me this is the first time Evan seen you correct yes as a magic missile just suddenly curves towards it like 40 minutes I know as we watch a magic I don't know okay so Evan hits the newcomer for 14 points of damage oh thank you oh I thought that was her for a second

[01:40:55] no she missed and tried to shoot Evan and missed but it but it alerted him so then he shot 14 damage worth of magic missiles at this guy could you imagine Evan's dead like that he just doo doo doo that's definitely what it did he just like doo doo doo and then he uses his bonus action and his movement to spur the heck out of that donkey and take off excuse me Evan you're still behind you oh wait shit shit weird

[01:41:25] depends on if we get disoriented during this time you might not know which way he went excuse me the others are still behind you dude well bye he's going cause to be fair despite despite the fact that he likes us the cart is more important than our lives I think it has it has supplies from the ship from what they were we don't know what's in it I know but that's what we're thinking he's taking your donkey with him I guarantee you Rook would do the same thing Rook would save his own life no he saved the cart's life

[01:41:54] he is prioritizing that what is there were eight orphans in the bathroom I don't give a damn eight orphans that have I don't give a damn they could help with eight orphans that can't guarantee my life's more important what if these eight orphans you guaranteed beat the Rookshalza you're not gonna remember these eight orphans could probably beat the Rookshalza themselves yo my fine black ass that was Arcus you're up alright

[01:42:24] so let's start yeah I missed one for initiative presumably there's four more that will be coming I say we deal with this guy and fuck off there's two of them we don't there's four my apologies fuck my deepest language fuck there's four more that may be approaching I say we deal with this one and skedaddle out of here skedaddle skedoodle don't you mean three more approaching no four because there was six of them it was one

[01:42:54] five more I didn't know about the he heard five more call cry we didn't he heard five more cries but this one was different from the other so I don't think it's alright I'm going to try and go scurry over to this man and start whacking and start poking him start whacking him start trying to whack him so that's what it's I'm gonna use lay on hands oh yeah fuck him no I'm gonna poke him you make it you make it

[01:43:23] 10 to spare I think that's me one two that's me one two that's that's one two three four five five that's six diagonal jump that's seven oh fine one that's seven what oh my god you were here one two three four five six seven alright I went here then so we're at an angle alright now they're now they're enclosing him do I get advantage of this in a hero sandwich

[01:43:54] yep hero sandwich we get advantage hero sandwich no I get advantage R2 that's a lot better 15 plus or no 15 that's with it that's with it that is it yay alright now my D8 time to poke him poke him poke him good time to poke him you poked it what the fuck is that the eye is in the way

[01:44:25] the eye does not want you to see this is a D4 that's a D8 my god no this is a D4 this is a D8 oh my god wait hold on you have to do that four four six well that is the D4 my apologies the D4 looks a lot like the D8 I know I have the same one alright so six damage poke poke that's not a very aggressive poke it's the Marth poke it's the Marth it's the Marth poke shield breaker

[01:44:56] that would have done like 14 but okay well I'm not you're not you're cause like you're a paladin right yes you can smite I know I can however I don't know if we're running into any more later on that's fair that's fair you heard the cries more than we did we only heard cries in general you know I just warned you guys there's presumably four you didn't verbalize hey guys there's more did I not just say hey guys there's four more we should probably finish off this one and skedaddle out of here oh okay

[01:45:25] so that you actually I did in fact tell you screw up so that was in character that was in character my bad alright so I'm ending turn for there okay alright so then that's me or is the other guy faster than me Evan's gone Evan is off are you following Evan still by the way did you move as he moved oh my god it turned does he know he knows he sees you

[01:45:54] now you don't he's like disappear out of the clouds he's like metal gear solid when they see you it's getting darker so it's easier to see the white in the sky in the sky it's a question what's that amazon package doing down there what's this amazon package in my fantasy world the exclamation mark when they notice you huh what's that amazon package in my fantasy world doing it's the exclamation mark when they see you huh arc yeah that's gonna hit you oh no fuck this is not the same as the others

[01:46:24] I told you it's different really there's so formal he only does a die four of damage hi how are ya uh can you uh give me a constitution save oh wait what oh poison no so you take six points of damage from the dagger dagger natural 20 on her constitution save yes great and you you start to shake for a minute um feeling the effects of a poison coming over you

[01:46:53] I told you you manage to shake it off but you still take one point of poison damage as well so yay I'm at 20 man I can tactical reload and there is a dagger sticking out of your thigh oh and I can tactical reload onyx I can tactical reload uh but he gets another shot oh great so uh this one is actually going at Arceus actually you know what I don't think

[01:47:23] I've shown enough love to onyx okay so this one's going for onyx hi hi hi I'm gonna need you to give me a constitution save pavos that's not bad actually hold on not bad at all that's not bad at all that's a 23 okay that's a 23 with everything added thank you very much you're hitting a dagger um and uh you feel you feel a poison coming over you okay

[01:47:53] uh you do manage to shake it off you take a single point of poison damage okay however the dagger well uh it hits you in the back oh it's uh it was just below the floating rib no you can't sparrow ooh might have been a liver shot oh shit uh it is in fact a crit as we watch as we watch onyx go down

[01:48:23] very slowly back pain so that'll be 11 points that's not bad that's not too bad that's not too bad giant woldner you expect to be a pebble he hit me like I was a pebble uh so then it's the uh the other foot soldier who is uh oh yeah he's sandwiched forgot he is faster than me uh he's going to laugh lash out in front of him at sparrow

[01:48:53] at you he's just laughing he's laughing out at you lashing out at you uh hitting you for seven points of slashing damage and then he's going to carry that attack through you didn't notice before but he has a dagger in his offhand now why do you have that stabbing at arceus which is uh going to hit him for two points of piercing damage oof

[01:49:22] and then a crit uh he's going to love to me to crit me except for those two so honest hey hey ow that hurts ow doom I think anyways sparrow we need to find a boss get him really low and then punch him to death i can reach the other guy they're sandwiching i'm going to the other guy onyx that guy's in the sky

[01:49:52] bigger blacker that's my plan the guy in the sky the guy that's on the ground that threw it at her yes he's in the sky no he's not he threw it at her if I remember correctly oh i thought he was at her right no no he attacked her by throwing a dagger at her my fault that though damn i thought he was in the sky that has a full bandolier of dagger of course he does watch me watch me kick his ass so he crawled out from the bush yeah metal gear crawled out

[01:50:22] i wish i could the bouncer I wish i could draw the bouncer right now but that would not do too much i think you can beat him up anyways punch him um punch him i'm not gonna punch him i have my axe in my hands right now punch him i'm gonna swim my axe punch him with the axe punch him with the blade of the axe punch him with the no punch him while holding it no why do you have my axe at him show him what you got show him what you got my baby

[01:50:53] someone in prison sparrow fuck yeah um ah that's why you're that's over 20 okay then that'll hit thank you not not that 20 but it's over 20 it doesn't hit you're welcome thank you um that's you oh shoot yeah who's uh who's over uh who's within five feet of um the other the dead foot soldier

[01:51:23] the dead foot soldier or the sparrow um i don't know if arcus is in but i don't think so so i think arcus is on the other side yes i think within 10 feet yeah so i think it's just me just you yeah so it's just me one have been at the time that he went down though yeah oh if you're gonna count when he went down then yes yeah i might have been i know i was yeah all three of us were why are you dragging yourself in because i'm not what are you doing as we watch him explode oh no they explode shush uh some of them do

[01:51:52] yes some of them turn into acid some of them do other things like this one i need all three of you to give me constitution saving throws that's wrong guy hold on 11 plus my constitution constitution okay i have 14 is that 17 or 12 i got 14 oh i got 30 14 that's a wrong fucking dice oh no i got 22 actually hold on we can all count

[01:52:23] he's like fuck stop living what happened sparrow sparrow what happened yeah wait i can save this guy i can save no yeah she's like no i can't save this far i can't save this far so 14 uh 1 no wait did you get onyx i'm not 22 22 uno uno so you watch sparrow

[01:52:53] see stitches it's like it's the baby with the acid arceus and onyx when he goes down um back his body turns to stone and uh uh this this horrid green looking gas starts leaking out of his orifices um as that green gas is wafting to you you're both rather prescient and you take a deep breath thanks guys thanks for the money um it was a good reaction your back was turned at the time

[01:53:22] thanks for the money gas because the other guy had attacked you so you didn't see it thanks for the money the gas has now reached your nostrils and you took a deep whiff uh ugh the heart your fingers what um start turning to stone oh shit i hate you whoa it's a crit fail to be fair it's a petrification yeah um yeah she's getting petrified

[01:53:50] so you're essentially restrained right now so on your next turn you get to make another saving throw and we'll see what happens i sniff it i sniff it wait so that was one saving throw so i just like window my fingers and it brings off is that one saving throw no ew yes um so i've rocks at the end of your next turn you get to roll again so i have two more left itchy butt no it's not a dash oh okay it's a different kind of save okay no onyx that was oh i'm x's turn yes yes and i hit him at

[01:54:20] over 20 so i need to roll that's to roll your damage that's another 8 my apologies the reaction 4 and 4 that's another 8 yes you see the death coming i want to kick him again too i want to see how that goes you know what that might do it that's um 17 yeah 17 will hit so you uh you take a swing with your axe

[01:54:49] you get it uh you chop it into his shoulder pretty good and it lodges in the bone you spartan kick him in the chest and it wrenches the blade free and you notice that it actually takes his whole arm with him or with you and uh that's a great sumonier i like grab him and kick him sumonier i hold my hand with my one hand grab kick collapses to the ground he's he's toast run run and you guys were dogging me about going he's down he's down i can't move i move

[01:55:19] either way either way i wanted to see the damage that would have been that would have been uh 6 anyways i wanted to see it uh okay that's sparrow up uh you are currently restrained as a bear as a bear yeah as a bear yeah your paws are in fact turning to stone well i'm actually you need to check what your constitution save is uh as a bear oh shit uh that's plus 3 yeah so it wouldn't have mattered uh

[01:55:49] so well um so you're starting to turn to stone so go ahead and roll me your um constitution saving throw why are you using a pencil it's plus 3 so because it's better than 1 hey 8 8 8 total yes correct no that ain't cool cut it really i'll give you that then i'm gonna cut it uh uh yeah so the um the stone spreads uh up your arms up your shoulders

[01:56:18] you are i could bash it with the side of my ass like the side of my shoulder and i'll poke it like bear end has turned to stone bye guys and that's all she wrote folks uh ark you're up i smite the bear just don't bear dude so wait did anything happen when i killed that guy i want to make sure because it would have happened as i killed him i feel

[01:56:48] it should have i feel personally i feel like it should have happened as i killed him but bash us move it's time to well what you feel and what happens are not always the same thing okay i'll roll a 35 out of it like that's possible for a second i thought this was pants it's just all pants okay is yes my favorite is he still in my life's sight it's like smg4 with a really long toad leg no uh maybe maybe a perception test

[01:57:16] it's like the smg4 with a really long muscular toad leg 16 that's good enough yes you you can't it's he's not clearly in your line of sight but you can see the movement of him and his cart through the trees okay so how do we plan to move the bear okay you don't it's snow and natural i say snow and natural i'ma be like um guys i'm i'm going to follow the i'm going to follow the cart okay the way you're going to you're going to you're going to you're going to you're going to

[01:57:46] around sparrows um bear or stone bear corpse let's see how great my athleticism all right we'll put up a sign please do not pee on extremely well that's a mat 20 she's got no asthma as in that 20 with holy modifiers rose been hit in the gym it's all right but it does become a 19 oh we need it what but it does become a 19 because you have a negative because minus 3 for strength but

[01:58:15] plus 2 for proficiency bonus oh my god i think you gotta get a plus 3 of she doesn't even itself out yeah but that's at my level 5 anyways do you want to catch up yes you do man i hope so at a 19 there's a tiny bit of asthma now apparently you're not very bye guys good luck have fun bye i'll be here as a natural national treasure i say we just put a sign here saying don't pee on this

[01:58:45] only bears will oh yeah maybe season guys maybe season uh so that's art's turn i guess uh top of the round uh onyx i need you to give me a uh here we go a constitution saving throw more gases escape from the split that you put in him and his mouth and his ears and nose and ass at least 16 does it uh 16 will do it it's like a song

[01:59:14] so it's higher than 8 that's an 11 16 makes it that's an 11 oh i thought you okay that's right i think 14 made it for me i feel like arceus you're up okay there's still a guy right what that's the that's a different guy this guy that there's still a guy that was alive with me and sparrow wasn't there yes yeah he's still alive the stronger one yeah he's just releasing gas the one in between you two is still alive the one in between us is still alive yeah this one's really

[01:59:44] that's the one in between us all right i'm weak sorry that was the one that was up by the cart that was killed so no what that uh that that save will not do and you take wait oh shit no it's a different kind oh shit uh you take it's not petrification so i'm fine you take 8 points of acid oh fuck that's not any better as suddenly he just starts to tear your head this is the bear good thing i was in the sky

[02:00:13] and fleeing the scene as we watch as onyx starts deteriorating here okay so yes arceus go okay i guess i'm stabbing do i still get the advantage of it despite them being petrified no dang it god damn how could you be petrified uh i don't know cause two assholes didn't warn me yeah you get an excuse because you weren't there you don't get no excuse i mean i was there when the first guy did this

[02:00:43] oh i'll try and punch you as a rock i just i i just i inhaled it my fingers started turning i just like wiggle my fingers i'm going to i guess stab the guy a little stabby rabbit yeah a little stabby rabbit see if i can stab through him and poke the uh bear as well why chisel the rocks i'm holding my axe like i'm holding my battle axe and playing it like making it look like i'm playing a guitar as the stuff all up ten ten no ten that will not cut it that will cut well yeah

[02:01:13] i'm not cutting i'm poking do i at least stab do i at least stab the bear no damn okay so then i guess that's that's it for you yeah yeah okay there's no much you can do against a petrified bear not so much not so much yet okay so then uh he's gonna attack at you oh well why won't you just hit the rock i'm all the way over there no the pebble not the pebble the rock dwayne johnson is not here

[02:01:43] no not not that rock that rock not the not the rock not the pebble that rock he wears that dude uh okay so he actually misses you oh just just a bug just misses he thought you were a bug there was a mosquito redirected it then we're on to onyx yes

[02:02:13] you are currently covered in acid yay get rid of it like shake some of it off shake it off shake it off shake it down you can try shaking a little off or you can take the time to like scrape it off because it's on you in big jobs oh then yeah i'll definitely do that is he dead okay it is going to take your action to do that okay okay nothing's threatening me at this very moment yeah they're just threatening me yeah can i like set my big ass down grab my hand axe and start like scraping

[02:02:43] he's getting tired of mediocre himself i'm fighting yes i am it's very severe buddy sparo is unconscious and made a stone it's not like i'm at 11 age you can't do shit on to you all right i'm gonna punch the rock when i'm done oh fuck you punched the bear in the face that was a nat 24 okay you notice uh one step into the path

[02:03:12] in front of the cart can we can i move this one wait what he's brandishing a blade and he is uh going to try to cut ebon down to get to the cart hey dude keep the donkey safe there's a guy keep the donkey safe uh my fine black ass can you set set it up thank you oogdy boogdy oogdy boogdy oogdy boogdy but the donkey's more important

[02:03:42] my fine black ass i know i know we're trying to go my fine black ass that's chit chat okay so evan hurls uh several magic missiles at the thing and they sink in deep and cause it to scream in pain but it is still on its feet and it is pissed why would you do that okay can i also shoot it with my bow yes absolutely yay yeah

[02:04:11] the wing carries the arrow away no it like the wing the wing yeah there's a dover it's caught that doesn't ate this one no but you do have 30 feet of elevation so you do get advantage roll again be better is that a 15 that's a 17 that's much better yay suddenly they're accurate so way better as she's doing that can we get like

[02:04:40] some heights or like those ones are all the ones that have shown up now the same size or I mean same size as them bigger than the first one um so the first two that you were dealing with were the same size okay so they're all between our heights a foot bigger than me uh yeah a foot taller than than harkus and a foot shorter than the two of us and that would be I remember we figured out that she was like 7'10 I'm like 7'6 something like that

[02:05:10] I was 7'10 yeah your elf is 8 feet tall someone see something like that something like that so close and I'm just the average human I'm the average human at like 5'10 5'11 I'm a bear I'm 10 feet tall I mean orcs are are well they're they're heavy but they're slightly taller than humans but they're only slightly taller than humans but it's also half giant do I also add dexterity bonus to your damage

[02:05:39] to your attack and damage yeah okay so that's um 7 7 uh did you add your sneak attack bonus as well no I did not because you were attacking with a hand 7 foot snow bear I was keeping it up on my leg modifier so I close this like a 30 whatever your dex is 12 what the fuck okay

[02:06:08] your arrow drops 7

[02:06:40] one went down to a kick one went down to me like cutting down while it was pelvis like he's like he's so graciously decided to describe and I've been poking it uh top of the round uh yay sleeping unless that unless that guy up where Evan is is faster then it'd be him uh no I'm just I'm just thinking about the other things that are going on in the background oh like last time it was your I'm scraping I think I finished scraping stuff I'm close

[02:07:10] scraping all the stuff off yeah you you have finished scraping all that stuff off uh yeah okay Arceus you're up don't say that just as we as we are right now think of it like that I'm going to poke the guy in front of me again you're going to stick him with your pokey end oh yeah I love poking with my stick with my sharp stick I love poking people with my sharp stick go ahead and uh share a plate with him

[02:07:40] no no definitely not it's no it's not straight no it's not no it's no when did you get so bad at this oh it's the tower I tell you it's just the tower it's not the tower the tower the tower speaks all well no it's only good to left-handed people that was a five it's not much better better than the two well Arceus he rolled a natural one so

[02:08:11] he just he just fucking misses no he misses and turns around his u he swings his u and like scrapes and but you step out of the way and his sword sinks into a tree stump and uh he goes to pull it out and it is good and stuck yeah they're the same uh do you want to take like five minutes to like get yourself ready five minutes Onyx you're up okay um will it take an action and put my uh hand axes away

[02:08:41] uh I'm assuming it would did you get it off I got the stuff off I'm just gonna put them away I'm gonna like I guess give them a little shake put them away and pick my bad effect off that I set down do it up okay I do that um real drippy Aaron they're pretty far away that one up there with Evan is pretty far away bullsbird how heavy is a bear bear's heavy yeah especially one made out of stone a bear's pretty heavy a stone bear's pretty heavy guys

[02:09:11] I think we could lift that just put our bag into it we I think I think we could lift that I'd be like I'd be like this you'd be like my my older brother owns a cement bear that's about the size of rebel yeah um and it takes five of us to lift nah so no we're not lifting that watch me put my back into it even in that 20 even in that 20 make it seem like put it on my oh put my back into it on it put your back into it as I slowly move it

[02:09:41] no as you as you pick start as you get under it start picking it and you start sinking into the ground anyways um my back isn't breaking it must be good I guess I'll just start I'm touring here I'm touring here are you gonna go to them or are you gonna I'm gonna go to you guys you and Evan or am I gonna go to didn't this one cease to exist she shot it with a bow and it ceased to exist well she dropped it she dropped an arrow on it and it hit it like a like a sledgehammer

[02:10:11] and it just collapsed to the ground in a boneless frothing heat oh yeah it's so dead it's so dead that's three the ones that we've seen dead it's so dead I'm back with the other guy I'm back with the other guy where we got the stone bear we got the you need to attack yeah attack the bear no no we need to chisel the bear out buddy I'm the stone that's over 20 exactly buddy you're gonna chisel oh wait

[02:10:40] my flesh man I think we lost a year but that's besides am I losing like the action of the bear like is the hour still going or is it frozen the hour is still going mother keep in mind a round of combat is six seconds oh okay anyways that's gonna be five on the axe swing I'm gonna depend on if he's down or not I don't even know if he's down before I kick him no he's stuck his sword is stuck in the tree he's not down

[02:11:10] his sword is stuck in the tree I'm gonna kick him I slashed him I probably slashed his leg off and he would like he doesn't even have his weapon he's stuck in a tree he's trying to pull it out right now he's working on pulling it out kick him into the bear what the f buddy you can help us you'll call him what do you want me to do we're gonna kick him into you and you're gonna call him I'm not hitting him again for the one second roll it no you missed just for a second you're gonna on better you're talking you're talking exactly

[02:11:39] you go to kick him and he lets go of his sword he lets go of the sword and takes a step back and you just like sail right on through I like chop his leg off he like hops back and then I like kick his sword further into the stump so uh Sparrow you're up you're gonna sit there and come on hey Sparrow you get to go psych going on I thought he stepped back and you just

[02:12:09] went like flying past I feel like I feel like even though I missed I feel like I should get to kick his sword further on the stump I mean I'm gonna have to work harder to get it out oh I thought you just kept going like 19 so you don't see anything up ahead of uh in fact you think up ahead you see a break in the trees finally however suddenly

[02:12:39] you also see the trees moving here moving and here as though there are things climbing through the branches and the underbrush guys you ain't safe around how do we unpetrify the bear that's I've been asleep for the past three months hey Sparrow there's ten more X's on the map right now of course we're in and you're petrified and you're petrified the bear all I can do is kick things

[02:13:07] no actually no I can't even kick things properly I missed alright we'll both put our back into it we'll put our back into it and we'll just start rolling the bear start rolling guys I mean he's still kicking there's more things in the trees we're out you're yelling like 40 feet away trust the dark vision helps me see it the dark vision helps you see it she's yelling like

[02:13:35] five of me away laying down yeah that's not bad actually yeah yeah okay well is that all what do you want to do so what's the plan the plan Stan is to see what she's gonna do and then see what happens from there I wanna see if I can try to shoot oh when I see this one of them

[02:14:05] one of the X's or the purple one that they're currently surrounding one of the X's like maybe this one to let them know hey guys there might be something behind you plus it was a unnatural 20 okay unnatural 20 roll me your damage I know I know okay I'm going as fast

[02:14:34] as things allow me to go I don't know hopefully not long we could be wrapping up any moment if things go the way that I want them to I'm trying okay so it's up to them not me let's keep it going guys oh we end at three in the morning do I get the stealth bonus for this one yeah yeah because I don't see you that's a one one

[02:15:04] one helps that's eleven okay fuck I don't hear a human scream oh oh good god what is that I know you don't have any figures but that's a big one that's not exactly what it looks like but that is a good representation of the size hey guys look at that thing I just shot in the basement the from a few episodes back the big thing in the basement it's roughly the size not what it looks like but the size

[02:15:33] what you see actually looks a little more like this what that's a big guy with like a big foot foot but it's like it's webbed is it webbed looks webbed it's um dragon parts he's essentially graph replaced some of his limbs with dragon pieces oh are those the people who cut up yeah there was ten of them there was so well that was the big one no but there's okay

[02:16:02] unless you're being inaccurate with the number of X's there's ten X's including the one that you set the guy on so and you're not even shooting at him you're shooting at the X well those are just the ones that you see yeah I mean I shot one of them exactly there's at least ten more there's so much more and he takes that he takes that arrow in his shoulder and just he doesn't even seem to notice it I don't think the whole lemonade doesn't notice it oh no I don't think we want this fight we don't want this fight we don't want the smoke yeah you guys okay if I can

[02:16:32] if I can gently remind you guys this is not a wipe out all opposition quest this is an escort quest yes I'm stuck with him we want to be able to not be overwhelmed by every single one of them if we ran from every one of them yes but the trees are almost ended which means that you're at the town yes does uh holy water how are we gonna get Sparrow over with us I'm sorry I can only hear one person does holy water clear petrification no darn it

[02:17:01] how are we gonna get Sparrow over there uh that is a very interesting question we start rolling her in theory she is actually largely invulnerable currently so I can go roll her for the next until they all start spawn camping her for the next minute cause you're only petrified for one minute oh shit so ten rounds and it's been like three four it's been three three yeah can we start rolling her you could yeah absolutely you can it'd be better than

[02:17:31] leaving her standing there uh we gotta deal right there we still gotta deal with the one guy right next to us yeah but you can do that right now uh have you seen my past rolls you should be able to do it right now Arceus it is your turn do it right now um I just don't miss what if he does something like that like with the others well we can't just let him attack us while we're rolling a sparrow I have an idea what do you we can't just let him swing us while we're

[02:18:00] rolling a big bear statue if only you had turned into a squirrel this wouldn't be quite the same I would've been able to pick you up I would've been able to carry you like this they could've played football with you go on go on go on run is Chip still safe yeah Chip's fine um Chip's probably with Evan he's in the tree you just walked oh I thought Chip would be like with Evan I have an idea Evan's not safe Evan's

[02:18:30] yes he is the guy up there is dead what okay I was gonna say I'm gonna attack uh you don't roll I'm rolling for I'm gonna try and poke him again okay six no no no okay well Arceus that's you know about what I expect from you these days birthday luck at least it's not a one where you can stab you birthday luck yeah oh man I'm waiting for that day where I stab you you're waiting for the day you stab me

[02:19:00] and say it was an arrow at the wall yep no you say it was an arrow at the middle of a tree branch oh yeah a tree branch dangling like a tree branch the size of a pencil which turns out it like opens this wide and shoots his down Arceus he stabs at you um with his backup dagger and hits you for two points how many daggers do you have as many as he needs less than the big guy at least right anyways at least less than the big guy right I'm at nine hp

[02:19:28] cool good for you I'm sitting he got shot with a longbow two at least twice by our goblin friend fourteen fourteen what are you at nine fourteen what fourteen one eleven and eight makes me at down to fourteen one eleven and eight is I say you punch this guy one eleven and eight is twenty by the way I say you punch him really really hard Onix he throws a dagger at you hitting you for

[02:19:58] four piercing damage Onix the constitution save was from the other type okay so this is not a poison dagger gotcha get it in the mouth Onix just punch him punch him as far as you can punch him as I'm holding my axe right now what do you want me to do that's why I've been kicking I've been punching your turn yes that's why I've been punching with the axe I'll write down the minus later punch him with it just swing my axe at him it's been going well that won't hit but it's

[02:20:28] kick him it's going less well five four two eleven no no no that's not going to cut it I'm going to kick him okay I don't kick him either that's also a or whatever I got last dang I think you should have punched him punch him with what the axe you punch him with it okay Ark you're up

[02:20:57] cause Sparrow is still asleep well petrified so we're going to have to book it yeah they're going to be on petrified like what's going on run Evan's going to turn his head what are you going to I'm going to shoot the we hear rustling in the trees there there there there there there there there there there there there oh yo Luigi uh

[02:21:26] that's 13 hit him Luigi no I fumbled I think I hit the grass beside him you did you did Gooigi that grass had it coming uh top of the round Arkias you're up alright wait I'm going to punch I'm going to punch him go for it buddy I'm going to punch him okay roll your dive punch him just going to switch sword to your other

[02:21:54] with the shield with the shield okay we're going to shield bash him so uh you're going to roll at disadvantage yup cause it's an improvised weapon here roll this one after that's an 11 plus whatever you would get or a 13 so the 11 plus whatever you get uh what would that be with the 11 uh well you're not proficient um so just your strength

[02:22:23] well bald's not going to cut it oh you took your dice I took my dice back I said it was 11 this is 11 well I was trying to find out where your dice went I was trying to like give it back to you and I was like okay let me just try my two attacks again oh he'd be next actually hold on yeah he's next my backer got a dice faster than me he looks haggard like like badly bleeding and he drops to a knee because he just uh

[02:22:51] he doesn't have much left to give and he takes his dagger and he um stabs himself in the chest oh my god no uh and expels that green gas uh I need everybody around to give a constitution alright get your constitution no he's not currently breathing constitution three no 11 3 2 11

[02:23:21] 3 2 is that a what I can catch 16 again what you're fine I've been fine every time except for that crit it would have been fine if it wasn't for the fact 10 that is not don't tell me I'm not going to be able to move either of them start to turn to stone god damn it and you're feeling restrained you're finding yourself very sluggish uh there are currently no enemies on the

[02:23:50] uh well you can tell that there's one where there's one giant as enemy but and you've heard that there are more in the bush behind you but uh currently there are none around how far can he move before he turns to stone uh he can move 30 feet before he um before he has to make another saving throw and if he fails that saving throw he turns to stone oh so he's going to be failing okay that's fine that's a way better

[02:24:20] can I start rolling run fair oh no you can try give me your strength check put my hand on you run would I be proficient with it no but he can give you advantage if he helps please I know you're I know you're slowly turning to stone but like could you sure okay pass me the dice pass me the dice I need to I kind of hope that you fail your save now so that I can say that you guys are both

[02:24:49] turned to stone and you're essentially hugging the stone bear ugh and that's the campaign everyone that's the campaign we're all done fellas I got advantage so I actually got I got 19 okay that'll do you actually managed to get the bear tipped and start rolling it is conveniently mostly downhill from here so long as you continue to make reasonable strength checks actually I will um you got it moving

[02:25:19] I need you to give me another constitution save to see if you also turn to stone and fuck this whole plan over ugh it's downhill so I don't need I'll still no I'll need more I need a higher score please don't wait is it 13 or 15 that was that's 15 can I see what it looked like cause I saw what it looked like yeah that's 13 I see I wanna see no I wanna see the numbers what it looked like yeah there's no 15 here that was a 13 16

[02:25:48] you're fine ugh the uh the stone from your fingertips all crumbles off uh and you seem to have shaken the petrification um so I need you guys to give me strength checks three of them three can I do my three and then his three or like me me him me him me you said three unless you mean three collective I need three collective okay I'll roll two

[02:26:16] I will not be doing two for two of them um I'm not proficient so that's 10 I got one plus one I know it's downhill but like I don't know if it's high enough can you do it do it okay I got one plus one you did not it didn't come down to the bottom no I got plus one fuck six we're not we're not gonna make it we're not gonna make it I don't know how much

[02:26:47] we're not making it it's downhill it should just be able to roll on its own well it shouldn't have to make a strength check the legs the legs it should keep it going in the right direction oh it hit the tree W hit it it's very good tree so this guy's dead he's gone so you guys got her rolling down this way and then she kind of went off to the side

[02:27:17] no no yeah you went way you guys are down yeah okay why are you on the way over there correct yes Evan has made it so move that and you've been following him you both make it okay you were following Evan I say we throw some shrubbery on her and we call it a day put a sign with some arrows going in a direction that she wants to go um

[02:27:47] you do she does actually wind up in like a gully that is uh rather you know somewhat protected kind of out of sight she's rolling down she's rolling down a gentle downhill and then all of a sudden it's just a drop off for like five feet as a stone in my opinion I would say leave in the stone's opinion in the stone's opinion you don't get an opinion you're a stone

[02:28:18] okay what's the play here leave leave her there leave her there so we can get her out of there uh we put some we should put some pebbles give her an arrow to get a follow so just like chisel me down and put some pebbles down actually wait we have a sword just draw in the dirt see if she'll notice I'll just draw I'll draw an arrow towards the general direction if you want to go hold on why are we drawing you in the dirt where is she where is she she'll see it hopefully we're in a roll we're not in a line

[02:28:47] she's petrified it's fine she may notice it what's I wake up you're petrified for another 15 seconds guys okay my bad okay but we don't need to we'll just like we'll just stay with her we're in the gully we're protected by like the little bit alright then crouch okay so next couple of rounds pass you guys need to give me stealth checks please don't fail please please don't fail stealth is oh okay

[02:29:19] stealth is your dexterity my guy oh wait you're right I'm actually good I'm actually good with dexterity so I'm wearing armor I'm gonna leave fine that's a wrap folks 12 we're both wait is that one of my proficiency no I suck we know they don't know where we are we should get advantage

[02:29:48] I hate the tower what I hate the tower oh god I want I want okay they don't know where we are they don't know where you are they have lost track of you in the trees they rolled a one a five and a six so they're oblivious somehow you guys have idiot savanted your way into not being spotted

[02:30:16] even with the clear trail that the giant brown bear made of stone made rolling through the brush flattening bushes and small trees and plants and animal life and a whole family of raccoons there's the animals um okay uh sparrow you wake up oh look at you've suddenly got your your sight back

[02:30:45] your skin doesn't seem to want to move so you just kind of flex and all this fucking powder and dirt and stone bursts off of you I'm gonna look at sparrow put my hand on their shoulder run just run and alert them that we're there with our masked object already thank you I mean you're barely awake but you're ready to go they don't hear the crumbling all wrong let's stealth away guys stealth away stealth away yeah

[02:31:15] I shall stealth away get on the bear get on the bear let's go okay wait wait let's stealth away don't we remember how we got I'll carry you uh uh lady cline cline you have like you have like six seconds of bear I don't know just petrification never mind you have more than a bear never mind yeah this took like an hour or they have an hour they have a lot of bear they're good isn't a bear really actually really quiet so like we could actually sneak away if I eat him okay hold on if I eat him and I just like crouch

[02:31:44] I believe you can be quiet I'll eat Arceus and speed him out later he'll eat Arceus you'll start walking like a bear on all four and I'll crouch behind you bears are not snakes they cannot unhinge their jaw and swallow their prey hole okay fine I'll put you in your mouth so you're not I'll help put you you'll put me in my mouth what no I will okay anyways bite you anyways anyways anyways are we slowly moving out of here or what happened are you

[02:32:14] I don't know I'm gonna walk you guys have just been stayed in there bickering I'm just gonna walk away they've been making listen checks they failed too but they're gonna wait actually at any moment I'm gonna walk away okay yeah we're walking away not even a cell phone I'm just walking oh my god well no we're not gonna walk we're gonna like we're gonna quickly but quietly oh no I'm walking make our way no I'm walking you guys stumble out of the tree line and like 30 yards away you see a uh uh uh a wooden palisade so like

[02:32:44] it's a wooden wall that's made of like spikes of wood do we see Evan called a palisade uh Evan is currently driving the cart through the gate bye Evan oh let's go catch up with him yeah let's go catch him alright you guys enter into the gate just as 45 draconians step out of the tree line aww tree line

[02:33:13] okay wait hold on tree line here or tree line past the gate there's no tree line past the gate okay then yeah okay there were another 45 in there I have if the number's written down I don't care if you have the number's written down that's a lot of fucking things uh yep yep most of them were the little ones some of them were the black ones and uh other than were big there was there was a couple of the big guys hmm unless there was one very big guy

[02:33:43] that you guys never came across can we see what he looked at that was the black one that was throwing daggers at us yeah we can see what he looked like I mean it's probably good that we see what he looks like somewhere else well yeah because you look up now so you actually see him you never spotted him because he was flying above you oh oh a guy bigger than this one was flying above her wait what a guy bigger than this one was the one that he used to he used this to represent the big one it's that

[02:34:12] which is a lot bigger than the one on the left which is the one this was represented this was representing the one on the left it's essentially what happens when a you remember logic and avatar no if you think you're all that you don't think to look up so okay I'll say that cliffhanger again if you had turned if Ark had turned out to be OP as fuck then that's what was going to come for her

[02:34:41] oh oh thank god thank god you were broken it was going to attract the attention of of said thing and it has an acid breath attack of course it is why wouldn't it of course the aerial battle anyways aerial battle is 1v1 1v1 with that huge thing and the like dog you guys get to the town yes and the guards at the gate close the gate there's probably 100 guards that are now

[02:35:11] climbing up the walls to repel these invaders which as teenagers they look at you and they're like no you're not helping with this they're probably surprised as fuck that we made it made it made it to them Eben however thanks you enormously and hands you each a small bag of platinum yeah um and shows you what's under the tarp finally 8 orphans

[02:35:41] 8 brass dragon eggs you weren't talking with us it was 8 orphans it was 8 orphans the brass dragons that came out of the portal in episode 1 the one that got shot out of the sky crashed to the ground had valid eggs that it hadn't laid yet Eben and Rook ravaged the body for the eggs cut the body open for the eggs

[02:36:10] and rescued them oh so that's why we're being hunted okay that is why you were being hunted because draconians are made from corrupted dragon eggs if we the creatures that you were fighting are actually the bastard blood cult ruined magic offspring created from dragon eggs

[02:36:41] so one of those eggs these aren't corrupted which they are because we made it there one of those eggs would produce 25 draconians don't think of it like okay if they're not corrupted we're fine we're just gonna keep these fine and safe which we didn't we lose one you did fuck so it's nine orphans or eight orphans there was nine there was nine there was 25 more

[02:37:10] guys there's 25 more one day there will be 25 more guys but that is the I'm gonna call it there that is that is the end of the that is the end of this arc he's like finally you guys comments questions suggestions how'd you guys enjoy it I liked it I loved it that was fun even though I'm down for arc two

[02:37:40] I'd do another one not like this not like that I'd do act two if you asked I'd do act two if you asked I would do another one yeah act two where we keep going act two but this time we time lapse to like level six no no warlock no no no we get a part two we time lapse a little I can't make any promises my weekends are so effing full because

[02:38:10] everybody needs stuff done Friday is not gonna happen you're not getting more Fridays anyway have fun internet I guess we're gonna call it wrong game Aaron thanks Chris thank you Chris thank you Chris