(D&D5e): Eberron: Ashat's Adventurers - Episode 12: Post-Mouirning Payday Part 1

[00:00:03] During the Last War, when the Elves of Aranol annexed Valinar from Seir, the Ashat Ranch stood defiant in the Borderlands.

[00:00:14] At the end of the Last War, when the morning creeped across Seir, decimating all in its path, the Ashat Ranch stood defiant in the Borderlands.

[00:00:26] Now, five years after the Last War, Mama Abby of the Ashat Ranch stands defiant but hopeful, with plans for a future for wayward Seirin survivors.

[00:00:41] She'll need help in this new expansion. Help from friends and found family. Help from Ashat's Adventurers.

[00:00:51] One Less Die! Thank you, Aaron! A 5th edition D&D actual play podcast.

[00:01:08] We're playing our Eberron campaign, the Ashat's Adventurers, or the Asshats.

[00:01:17] When last we left off our heroes, or adventurers, they had just recovered a... their very own...

[00:01:24] They finally procured their very own land cart, elementally bound to an Earth Elemental.

[00:01:29] And it only cost them to dig deeper, or dig themselves deeper in with a Mafia.

[00:01:35] I mean, you do what you have to do for the town. For the greater good.

[00:01:38] I've done worse stuff for last quarter.

[00:01:40] So, yeah, you guys have gotten back with the land cart.

[00:01:44] Captain Twilo dropped off your... you guys and your stuff.

[00:01:48] So, it's been about a day, I think.

[00:01:50] So you guys are all in the Ash Hole Inn.

[00:01:52] Or, you know... no, sorry, you're not in there because it's not been done yet.

[00:01:55] It's still being worked on.

[00:01:57] Actually, no, no, it is done.

[00:01:58] Because it would have been about two or three days by the time you guys got back from Sharn.

[00:02:04] So now we can hang out in my Ash Hole.

[00:02:07] So it's the inaugural opening of the Ash Hole.

[00:02:10] We can christen it.

[00:02:12] You can christen the asshole.

[00:02:14] The Ash Hole.

[00:02:16] Oh, man.

[00:02:17] Is there anybody in our town who is particularly a jerk?

[00:02:22] Not yet.

[00:02:23] You can make up one.

[00:02:24] Just...

[00:02:25] Because that dick really should hang out in the Ash Hole.

[00:02:28] Okay.

[00:02:28] Well, who's gonna be the dick?

[00:02:31] Richard...

[00:02:32] Something.

[00:02:34] Should be Richard.

[00:02:36] Richard Fromage.

[00:02:40] Okay, I don't... that went over my head to the last name.

[00:02:43] What?

[00:02:43] Fromage.

[00:02:45] Dick Cheese.

[00:02:46] Yeah.

[00:02:48] It's an Elven man.

[00:02:49] He's Elven.

[00:02:53] Sorry.

[00:02:54] It's okay.

[00:02:55] I'm...

[00:02:55] The elves aren't out there.

[00:02:57] Aren't gonna be insulted.

[00:02:57] He'll be insulted.

[00:02:58] Well, that's basically what's his name?

[00:03:00] Yeah, that's true.

[00:03:01] And what can it translate to?

[00:03:02] Yeah.

[00:03:05] Speaking of, let's introduce characters again.

[00:03:07] So, starting directly in front of me, so I don't have to look at directions.

[00:03:12] Aaron.

[00:03:12] Hi, I'm Finn.

[00:03:15] Hi, Finn.

[00:03:17] And it's been...

[00:03:19] One week since you looked at me.

[00:03:21] Six weeks since I've cast a spell.

[00:03:24] Good job.

[00:03:25] We're proud of you.

[00:03:28] Yep, yep.

[00:03:29] I'm Finn.

[00:03:30] I'm a paladin warlock.

[00:03:33] Or at this point, I suppose we should say warlock paladin.

[00:03:36] Because I'm far more warlock than I am paladin.

[00:03:40] Yeah, are you an even warden anymore?

[00:03:44] Or...

[00:03:45] Yeah, I'm kind of a warden.

[00:03:47] And I'm actually considering taking another level of paladin.

[00:03:50] But I'll probably go bard first.

[00:03:53] To make it as confusing as possible.

[00:03:55] Hell yeah!

[00:03:56] Because everyone has to multiclass here.

[00:03:58] Well, you guys are the asshats.

[00:04:00] For a reason.

[00:04:04] Also, I just keep looking at...

[00:04:05] So I wrote down Richard from Maj.

[00:04:07] And all I keep thinking is it actually should just be Richard the Fro Mage.

[00:04:12] I like it.

[00:04:13] He says a huge fro.

[00:04:14] He's just an elf with a fro.

[00:04:15] And he's also a mage.

[00:04:16] Yeah.

[00:04:17] He's a hedge mage.

[00:04:18] He's a hedge.

[00:04:20] Yeah, his hair is green.

[00:04:21] It's like...

[00:04:23] Alright, that's it.

[00:04:24] That's it.

[00:04:25] Yeah.

[00:04:25] He's in.

[00:04:26] Richard the Fro Mage.

[00:04:28] We're supposed to make someone who's like not...

[00:04:31] Actually, I'll make it...

[00:04:32] Yeah.

[00:04:33] Richard the Fro Mage.

[00:04:35] Now I want to be this guy.

[00:04:36] And then I'll just make it Elven Hedge Mage.

[00:04:39] Now I keep thinking of him as basically as cool as Afro Samurai.

[00:04:43] Yeah.

[00:04:43] I mean, he's not that cool.

[00:04:46] Anyway.

[00:04:47] He's like great value.

[00:04:48] Yeah.

[00:04:51] He's the Mr. Pip.

[00:04:54] Or...

[00:04:55] He didn't even bother going to doctor school.

[00:04:59] Get a doctor in chiropractic.

[00:05:02] Oh man.

[00:05:03] Holviopathy.

[00:05:05] And then to Aaron's left.

[00:05:08] You could just say beside Aaron.

[00:05:11] I am Kirklus of Andros.

[00:05:14] Elf.

[00:05:15] Ranger.

[00:05:16] Multi-classed into...

[00:05:18] Rogue?

[00:05:20] Yeah.

[00:05:21] So I'm...

[00:05:24] Former mercenary of the Brotherhood of Nod.

[00:05:31] And now a resident of Vashat.

[00:05:33] Resident of Vashat.

[00:05:34] A local sharpshooter.

[00:05:35] He's a proper Ashat.

[00:05:38] Alright, and that was Merit.

[00:05:41] And next to Merit we have Dave.

[00:05:43] Yep, that's me.

[00:05:43] I am playing Copper and also Rob who is Copper's steel defender.

[00:05:48] Do we have Rob back now?

[00:05:50] Yeah, he's been back the whole time.

[00:05:52] Oh, okay.

[00:05:52] I just remember he died.

[00:05:54] Yeah, he died.

[00:05:56] Was he version 3?

[00:05:57] No, version 2.

[00:05:57] He only died once.

[00:05:59] He was rebuilt at the end of that episode basically.

[00:06:02] We rebuilt him.

[00:06:04] We have the technology.

[00:06:05] I could rebuild him in like two hours.

[00:06:07] Something like that.

[00:06:07] It's relatively quick.

[00:06:09] Anyway...

[00:06:10] Tactically disposable.

[00:06:11] Don't say that.

[00:06:14] .exe

[00:06:16] .wavfile

[00:06:18] Regardless, I'm a warforged artificer wizard.

[00:06:23] So an artificer.

[00:06:25] I'm an ex-city guard from the city of Tranish.

[00:06:29] I witnessed the morning happen and that fucked me up, but that's fine.

[00:06:33] I literally walked past the border of Seir and looked back as people were running past you and looked and saw this horrible mist come down.

[00:06:43] Yeah.

[00:06:44] Bad shit happened.

[00:06:46] Yeah.

[00:06:46] Did that make you a roger?

[00:06:48] Or a Rangu?

[00:06:50] A Rangu.

[00:06:51] A Rangu.

[00:06:52] A Rangu.

[00:06:53] That sounds like a delicate...

[00:06:54] That sounds like some kind of Italian cuisine.

[00:06:56] It does.

[00:06:57] It does.

[00:06:57] It's a Rangu.

[00:06:59] Yeah.

[00:07:00] Yeah.

[00:07:01] I heard that or like...

[00:07:02] I heard that or like...

[00:07:03] Either an Italian delicacy or a variant of the Tengu.

[00:07:08] Or Pingu's cousin.

[00:07:13] That's what it is.

[00:07:14] You gotta wear a tux now.

[00:07:16] You gotta like cousin comes to town.

[00:07:18] Wee-woo a lot.

[00:07:19] Wee-woo a lot.

[00:07:20] Wee-woo.

[00:07:20] What's he saying?

[00:07:21] Is that Wee-woo?

[00:07:22] Newt.

[00:07:22] Newt-Newt!

[00:07:23] Yeah!

[00:07:23] It's Newt-Newt!

[00:07:25] Yeah.

[00:07:25] Um...

[00:07:26] Yeah.

[00:07:27] Regardless.

[00:07:28] All Americans are just...

[00:07:30] Look up Rangu and be educated.

[00:07:32] Yeah.

[00:07:33] Like Canadian broadcasting.

[00:07:34] Yeah.

[00:07:35] Just go Google that.

[00:07:36] Yeah.

[00:07:37] We're going to...

[00:07:37] Regardless.

[00:07:38] My name's Copper because I have...

[00:07:40] The medal on my construction is actually Copper.

[00:07:43] That's where I got my name.

[00:07:44] Because they tend to get nicknames very plainly like that.

[00:07:49] Like if they're red, they would be called red.

[00:07:52] If they wear pants, they'll be called pants.

[00:07:54] Yeah.

[00:07:55] Like...

[00:07:56] A suggestion in the book.

[00:07:57] Yeah.

[00:07:58] Basically like depending on what they were made from, what they do, like...

[00:08:01] Yeah.

[00:08:01] What their purpose or profession is.

[00:08:03] Like that's something like that.

[00:08:04] Yep.

[00:08:04] And my steel defender is basically a...

[00:08:10] Um...

[00:08:11] Saint Bernard.

[00:08:11] Saint Bernard?

[00:08:12] Yeah.

[00:08:12] But he looks like he's made of like dwarven or steampunky kind of construction.

[00:08:19] And he has the barrel around his neck with a health flask in it.

[00:08:22] Yeah.

[00:08:23] We haven't used that yet.

[00:08:24] Haven't needed to.

[00:08:26] Or I just...

[00:08:27] I could have used it actually.

[00:08:29] How many times did you forget about that dog though?

[00:08:31] Only the once really bad.

[00:08:34] The point to where I cried on recording.

[00:08:37] It was...

[00:08:39] It was really sad.

[00:08:41] No!

[00:08:42] He like...

[00:08:43] He almost like gave up.

[00:08:45] It's like, I can't believe I forgot about Rob.

[00:08:47] Yeah.

[00:08:47] Like collapsed over his character sheet.

[00:08:49] And openly wept.

[00:08:52] Yeah.

[00:08:52] So...

[00:08:53] Yeah.

[00:08:53] It's been about two or three days since you guys left Sharn and like you've arrived now.

[00:08:58] So you're...

[00:08:59] You've got your land cart.

[00:09:01] You're in...

[00:09:02] You're in the like kind of...

[00:09:05] The modest ceremony of the inaugural opening of the Ashul.

[00:09:10] Planning your venture into the misty...

[00:09:14] Into the misty wasteland that is the Mormons.

[00:09:18] For this bank salvage operation.

[00:09:23] In the city of Tranish.

[00:09:25] So this will be...

[00:09:26] Pleasant.

[00:09:27] I'm sure.

[00:09:27] A pleasant reunion for our little copper golem here.

[00:09:33] I'm sure.

[00:09:37] So...

[00:09:37] Yeah.

[00:09:39] You guys are...

[00:09:40] Anything you guys want to prep before...

[00:09:42] Otherwise...

[00:09:43] Before going into...

[00:09:45] Before setting off into the Mormons?

[00:09:46] Well our...

[00:09:47] Elf companion wasn't with us on our last adventure.

[00:09:50] Was he?

[00:09:51] I don't recall.

[00:09:52] He was the last time I was here.

[00:09:53] He was with us to go in there.

[00:09:56] He wasn't with us when we were underground.

[00:09:58] Oh no.

[00:09:59] No, he was there for a little bit and then you teleported him and then he stayed in the chat.

[00:10:03] Right.

[00:10:03] When you guys went back.

[00:10:05] Yeah, that's how we got it.

[00:10:05] Yeah, he wasn't there for us going to get the land carton.

[00:10:09] You were here last week.

[00:10:11] All I missed was you guys getting the shit kicked out of you by a bunch of...

[00:10:16] By a bunch of necromancer cultists.

[00:10:21] Yeah, there was a lot of them.

[00:10:22] We all died.

[00:10:24] Emerald Kull cultists and four minotaur skeletons that just wrecked your shit for three or four rounds.

[00:10:31] Yeah, a little bit but it's fine.

[00:10:32] In hindsight we really should have killed them in the glass town.

[00:10:36] In hindsight...

[00:10:37] If only someone said that we should have.

[00:10:44] But yeah.

[00:10:45] Yeah, I remember like I was actually recently...

[00:10:47] I've edited them all up.

[00:10:48] Oh no, I actually haven't edited them all up.

[00:10:49] But I was looking over that.

[00:10:52] Aaron was just like...

[00:10:53] He threw his papers down.

[00:10:54] I was like, I can't believe you fucking killed me.

[00:10:56] He's like, hang on, hang on.

[00:10:59] It was quite funny.

[00:11:03] Because like, out of game, the way the adventure was supposed to go is like you guys would have been like KO'd to like zero.

[00:11:11] You'd think you were dead initially but you actually would wake up like sometime later from...

[00:11:16] Because as the adventure is supposed to say, it's like basically the guys knock you out to an inch of your life.

[00:11:20] Take your shit and leave.

[00:11:23] And leave you in the Mornlands and then Phalen would have showed up to like help you out.

[00:11:28] Because Phalen was hiding in the rocks the whole time.

[00:11:33] But that doesn't make any sense.

[00:11:35] It's what the adventure said, so...

[00:11:37] Okay, yeah.

[00:11:41] But yeah, so...

[00:11:44] Yeah, anything you guys want to prep before going?

[00:11:47] You have the land cart, you have whatever gear you guys have right now but...

[00:11:50] What do we need for the heist?

[00:11:52] Do we get someone to make bella clavis for us while we're gone?

[00:11:55] Well, actually, dude, you worked as a guard, right?

[00:11:57] Yeah.

[00:11:58] So you could roll a history check if you'd like.

[00:12:01] Okay.

[00:12:01] Frap.

[00:12:03] What?

[00:12:04] I guess I need like a mask.

[00:12:08] Welding mask?

[00:12:09] No, a Zoro mask.

[00:12:10] Oh, a Zoro mask.

[00:12:12] To complete the ensemble.

[00:12:13] You could get...

[00:12:15] You could see if Jorts will make you a demon hide mask.

[00:12:22] Well, no, I need to get my entire outfit done as that.

[00:12:24] Yeah.

[00:12:25] I have a disguise kit now.

[00:12:26] I can probably make that up.

[00:12:28] Yeah.

[00:12:29] Mm-hmm.

[00:12:31] Okay.

[00:12:31] Pass.

[00:12:33] Just accept the Zoro.

[00:12:39] So...

[00:12:39] That's Geffinden.

[00:12:43] It doesn't look like an F.

[00:12:45] Yeah.

[00:12:45] Yeah.

[00:12:46] Yeah.

[00:12:46] It's like a cursive F.

[00:12:48] Yeah.

[00:12:48] Yeah.

[00:12:49] So when am I rolling?

[00:12:50] You're rolling history.

[00:12:53] If you don't have that intelligence.

[00:12:56] Yep.

[00:13:00] 16?

[00:13:00] Okay.

[00:13:02] Yeah, we'll say that you...

[00:13:04] Because you were a guard in the town of Tranish, or in the city of Tranish, so you knew...

[00:13:09] You had connections with some of the guards that worked in the TD Bank, the Tranish Dwarf Bank.

[00:13:17] Yes.

[00:13:18] Mm-hmm.

[00:13:19] So you know that they had a small contingency of security, Warforged, in the bank, and you

[00:13:27] have a little bit of a lay of the land of it.

[00:13:29] I can actually give you a little map.

[00:13:31] Ooh.

[00:13:31] You actually know the layout, roughly, of the bank.

[00:13:36] Hell yeah.

[00:13:37] So this is...

[00:13:38] I'm pulling some of this material...

[00:13:41] Well, mostly just the map and some of the stuff from Red Markets.

[00:13:44] For my map that I drew, I did for Red Markets.

[00:13:48] Oh, awesome.

[00:13:49] So that is the layout of the bank.

[00:13:54] So it has basically like an area for stables on the side.

[00:13:59] The security area, like the barracks kind of area is there up in the north part.

[00:14:03] Front door, back door?

[00:14:04] Yeah.

[00:14:05] The front door is actually here.

[00:14:05] This is like the lobby area.

[00:14:07] Oh yeah.

[00:14:07] Okay.

[00:14:08] And then the vault is basically here, past like basically the counters where all the bankers

[00:14:15] and stuff are.

[00:14:15] There are, you know that there are, there is actually a row of specially designed automated

[00:14:22] coin machines.

[00:14:24] Basically, Steampunk ATM machines.

[00:14:27] Nice.

[00:14:29] In one of the hallways that was guarded, that was like, they had a guard on it so that people

[00:14:34] weren't like abusing it.

[00:14:36] Actually, I see.

[00:14:37] It should be an automatic token machine.

[00:14:39] So it's like, you put a token in and it gives you a certain amount of money based off the

[00:14:43] token you got.

[00:14:44] Yeah.

[00:14:46] And then like the bank itself, the vault itself was where they kept most of the actual like

[00:14:51] coinage and like money and such as well as rather like certain like nobles or people

[00:14:57] of high class would store like valuables and natural as well.

[00:15:02] Is this elevator also there?

[00:15:03] There's not an elevator.

[00:15:04] Oh yeah, it's a lift.

[00:15:05] Yeah.

[00:15:06] Okay.

[00:15:07] Is there a second floor?

[00:15:08] Is there an elevator?

[00:15:09] Is there an elevator?

[00:15:11] There's an elevator.

[00:15:11] I don't think there's an elevator.

[00:15:13] I'm just saying that's an elevator.

[00:15:14] No, there's an elevator but there is no second.

[00:15:16] Yeah.

[00:15:16] Second floor might be just like, like office, like an office space maybe.

[00:15:20] Would that go down to a basement or something?

[00:15:22] Maybe.

[00:15:23] The real vault.

[00:15:25] Yeah.

[00:15:25] The big one.

[00:15:26] Yeah.

[00:15:26] That's a stairway as well.

[00:15:28] Yeah, there's a stairway.

[00:15:28] So then that goes up.

[00:15:29] So I'm going to say that the stairway that goes up is actually just goes up to like,

[00:15:33] basically some like, or like the financing offices or something above the bank.

[00:16:04] Hmm.

[00:16:06] Where's the house?

[00:16:08] Hang on.

[00:16:10] There is actually a house that would be in charge of like wards and stuff for that for

[00:16:13] the bank.

[00:16:14] Like for security.

[00:16:19] It was the house, uh, house, uh, Kundurak.

[00:16:26] Um, which are, uh, they're the ones that like are basically, they're the ones that specialize

[00:16:30] with like, um, like war, like magical wards to protect, uh, from like magical attacks or

[00:16:35] from magical, uh, like intrusions and such.

[00:16:40] Uh, yeah.

[00:16:40] And they're actually, they're, they're very much affiliated with the banking guilds of the

[00:16:44] world.

[00:16:48] So how common are you can bypass their magical security?

[00:16:51] That is true.

[00:16:53] I can try.

[00:16:55] I haven't tried doing it before, so it'd be a first time for me.

[00:16:59] I'm fairly certain I can get the locks.

[00:17:01] Yeah.

[00:17:02] Yeah.

[00:17:03] I just don't want to take a lightning bolt to the face again.

[00:17:06] Yeah, that's true.

[00:17:09] That was fun.

[00:17:11] For someone, at least.

[00:17:12] Not for everyone.

[00:17:13] That was just fun when you guys like, alright, we decided one trap.

[00:17:17] Matrushka trap!

[00:17:18] Yeah.

[00:17:21] And then you guys were prepared for it for the three other times it happened.

[00:17:25] Uh huh.

[00:17:26] Uh huh.

[00:17:27] Uh huh.

[00:17:28] At least you don't make the same mistakes repeatedly.

[00:17:29] Yeah.

[00:17:31] But that's when you guys, yeah, so that's what you know about the bank in Merrill, in Trot.

[00:17:35] That's the only, that's the bank that you know of.

[00:17:37] So you guys have like a kind of a target.

[00:17:39] Yeah.

[00:17:40] Or a destination.

[00:17:41] Also for all we know, like any magical locks and stuff aren't even active anymore.

[00:17:44] Like I don't know what kind of disarray it's in or it's been looted.

[00:17:47] Or even worse, they've mutated into living spells.

[00:17:51] Yeah.

[00:17:51] So suddenly there's a living ward that's just like, roaming around.

[00:17:55] Yeah.

[00:17:57] Uh, cause you guys already heard, you guys know from that vault that you got, from the

[00:18:02] Whiteheart facility that there were such, there are, you guys have now confirmed that

[00:18:07] there are in fact these mutated living spells, um, in the Mournlands as a result of

[00:18:12] the arcane storm that consumed the kingdom of Seer.

[00:18:16] Mhm.

[00:18:18] My character sheet is missing some stuff.

[00:18:20] What are you missing?

[00:18:22] Well, cause it says that I'm still wearing studded leather armor.

[00:18:25] Okay.

[00:18:26] But I remember when we were in the, when we were in the labs, I upgraded my armor and my shield.

[00:18:32] I have it here.

[00:18:33] You do?

[00:18:34] Yep.

[00:18:35] Okay.

[00:18:35] Cause you gave me the, uh, sheet with all the stuff that you got on the day I was gone.

[00:18:39] Apparently I didn't rank it on my character sheet.

[00:18:42] Damn it, Aaron.

[00:18:44] Ranking it, gulping that down was not a good idea.

[00:18:47] Yeah, that's, that's probably done.

[00:18:49] This is sipping.

[00:18:49] I know.

[00:18:49] I don't know.

[00:18:51] I'm sorry.

[00:18:52] It's okay, at least you don't have to talk for exorbitant amounts of time.

[00:18:56] It's not a good one, it's okay.

[00:19:00] It was very good though.

[00:19:02] I do try.

[00:19:05] This episode brought to you by, Bordy Creek Taphouse Whiskey.

[00:19:09] Also by, Hopgobble.

[00:19:11] Also by, uh, Easy Dice Roller Dice Cup.

[00:19:15] Easy Roller Dice Cup.

[00:19:17] Easy Roller Dice Cup.

[00:19:18] Easy Roller Dice.com.

[00:19:19] Yeah, I was actually re-listening to an RPPR game and they don't do Easy Roller Cup.

[00:19:23] Easy Roller Dice Cup.com.

[00:19:25] It's Easy Roller Dice.com.

[00:19:27] That's the mantra.

[00:19:28] Is that the actual website?

[00:19:30] Yeah, that's the one.

[00:19:30] I would think so.

[00:19:31] Okay, Aaron, it's a plus two chain shirt.

[00:19:33] I love this Dice Cup.

[00:19:34] Thank you.

[00:19:35] It's a cracking version.

[00:19:36] You have a plus two steel shield as well.

[00:19:39] They have different sigils and such on them.

[00:19:43] And I would use my sharp edge dice, but they're made of stone.

[00:19:50] They're made of like a metal.

[00:19:52] Why is that a problem?

[00:19:53] I did not bring my steel dice.

[00:19:55] Rolling them would be hazardous probably to this table.

[00:20:00] You have an Easy Roller Dice Cup from EasyRollerDice.com.

[00:20:03] Yeah, but then I have to like throw it down.

[00:20:07] I mean, I guess.

[00:20:08] Yeah.

[00:20:10] Maybe.

[00:20:10] Also, this is legitimately a caltrop.

[00:20:14] Yeah, a little bit.

[00:20:15] Greenlight for this D3.

[00:20:16] Like that will definitely go through somebody's foot.

[00:20:19] That's like the next step up from stepping on a Lego.

[00:20:22] Oh, yeah.

[00:20:23] Yeah.

[00:20:24] Or what the, or like ball or Christmas tree bulbs and ornaments from Home Loan.

[00:20:30] Mm-hmm.

[00:20:31] Mm-hmm.

[00:20:41] So yeah, to potentially bypass any wards, would I know if I would need anything for that?

[00:20:47] Um.

[00:20:50] Is there a specific spell I need to know?

[00:20:54] Give me a second here.

[00:20:56] Uh, roll me a, um, an Arcana.

[00:21:02] Since now that you're realizing, oh yeah, we're going to a bank.

[00:21:05] You may want to see like what, what, what would House Condorak use?

[00:21:08] Like, uh, what would be like the standard kind of like?

[00:21:11] Nat 20.

[00:21:12] Alright.

[00:21:12] Um, you know that they will likely, uh, implement Alarm Spell, Arcane Lock Spell, um, Glyphs

[00:21:18] of Warding, um, Secret Chests, uh, or like, uh, Leomans Secret Chests.

[00:21:26] Um, and, uh, that's about it.

[00:21:30] So nothing offensive.

[00:21:32] Uh, nothing that they would, yeah.

[00:21:33] Like, I think they, they, I'll say like, you, you know.

[00:21:36] Are you with Guards and Wards?

[00:21:37] Oh no, they use, they use Dwarf Wards guards.

[00:21:39] Um, or.

[00:21:40] Guards and Wards is a spell.

[00:21:42] Oh, is it? Okay.

[00:21:43] Yes.

[00:21:43] Sure, yeah, they do.

[00:21:48] I guess I should make sure that's a thing in 5th edition.

[00:21:50] Please.

[00:21:52] You're out of date.

[00:21:55] Well, I mean, it was in 3rd edition, it was in Pathfinder.

[00:21:58] What are the chances?

[00:21:59] There is, uh, Mordenkind's Faithful Hound.

[00:22:11] Also, while you guys are looking up, did you guys know that Kroll, the movie, was originally

[00:22:16] going to be a D&D adaptation?

[00:22:18] Really?

[00:22:19] Yeah.

[00:22:19] And like, my, like, I heard that about, like, I saw that today, and I was like,

[00:22:23] what, what setting was that for?

[00:22:26] Was Kroll 4?

[00:22:30] That's a good question.

[00:22:31] Which one has the Throneglaive like that?

[00:22:33] It's the Stardife.

[00:22:35] It was Pathfinder all along.

[00:22:36] Yeah.

[00:22:38] Decades after, a decade before it even, before, what do you think?

[00:22:42] On the left.

[00:22:43] On the left.

[00:22:44] On the left.

[00:22:44] You might want to peruse that.

[00:22:47] Where's the Eberron book?

[00:22:48] Is that it?

[00:22:49] The Torrents and Woods.

[00:22:50] You need the Eberron book?

[00:22:52] Yep.

[00:22:53] Here you are, my friend.

[00:22:54] Thank you.

[00:22:55] Because as an Earth Visser, I do technically have access to all my spells.

[00:22:59] I do learn about Strict Steven, a curriculum of magic.

[00:23:03] I don't care about that.

[00:23:06] Dungeon Master's Guide?

[00:23:07] No.

[00:23:08] Living Greyhawk as it's here?

[00:23:13] No, I don't think I need any of that.

[00:23:14] Okay.

[00:23:15] What's all this book learning y'all are doing?

[00:23:17] I don't know where they are.

[00:23:18] Who is this?

[00:23:19] I don't know.

[00:23:19] It's almost like a caster.

[00:23:23] Martial class for the win.

[00:23:24] You're a caster.

[00:23:29] Oh my caster.

[00:23:29] Oh yeah, okay.

[00:23:30] You're a secondary caster.

[00:23:32] You're not a primary caster, but you are a secondary caster.

[00:23:34] Yeah, that's true.

[00:23:35] I guess Hunter's Mark technically is as well.

[00:23:38] Yep.

[00:23:40] Guards of Words seems to just basically do exactly what I...

[00:23:42] Basically has like a slew of spells depending on the...

[00:23:46] What part of the building you're in.

[00:23:49] That I mentioned earlier.

[00:23:50] So like alarm and like fog and stuff, so...

[00:23:53] So, before we start breaking into vaults, we should go upstairs and check the offices.

[00:23:59] Because somewhere there's probably a post-it note with all the passwords on it.

[00:24:02] That's true, yeah.

[00:24:03] If it's still there after five years.

[00:24:05] Well, everything else is still intact.

[00:24:08] Well...

[00:24:09] I mean, there might have been scavengers.

[00:24:11] Like, people like you guys might have had the same idea within the last five years.

[00:24:15] We'll see.

[00:24:16] There's also...

[00:24:17] While I guess most people are dead in...

[00:24:20] Or worse in the Mourlands, there are still the Warforged Raiders that roam around as well.

[00:24:26] So they might have taken advantage of all these dead cities.

[00:24:30] What were the magical wards that I know would be?

[00:24:33] There's a Harkane Lock, Alarm, Glyph of Warding, Magic Circle, Leoman's Secret Chest, Mordenkind's Faithful Hound, and then there's this Garden Ward.

[00:24:51] Garden Ward?

[00:24:53] Guard and Ward, not Garden Ward.

[00:24:57] As long as we stay at the Garden, we're fine.

[00:24:59] Yeah.

[00:24:59] Just an evil shrub.

[00:25:01] Shrubbery!

[00:25:03] Had to get that in one time.

[00:25:07] It's obligatory.

[00:25:09] There must be at least one mighty python reference.

[00:25:11] Yeah.

[00:25:11] Per session.

[00:25:12] Guards and Wards.

[00:25:13] That's...

[00:25:13] It's basically a spell that like...

[00:25:17] It's a six level ever-aburation spell that basically does like...

[00:25:20] It adds a bunch of spell-like abilities to a bunch of locations in a building.

[00:25:30] So yeah.

[00:25:31] I'm stealing those beer I buy you.

[00:25:33] Oh.

[00:25:34] How dare you.

[00:25:35] How dare, sir?

[00:25:36] How dare.

[00:25:38] How dare.

[00:25:40] This guy is un-fucking-believable.

[00:25:46] Looks like I know Arcane Lock and Alarm.

[00:25:52] Do you?

[00:25:53] Yeah.

[00:25:54] How?

[00:25:55] Artificer.

[00:25:56] It's in the list.

[00:25:57] Oh, okay.

[00:25:57] And if it's in the list, you know them.

[00:25:59] Yep.

[00:26:00] Do you have...

[00:26:01] Is Knock in the list?

[00:26:02] No.

[00:26:06] Because I realized, Aaron, I have that book.

[00:26:08] Mm-hmm.

[00:26:09] No, I just handed it to you because I had it on the right page.

[00:26:12] Yep.

[00:26:12] I'm actually gonna bookmark that spot.

[00:26:15] Okay.

[00:26:16] My character is spelled Knock Up.

[00:26:19] Do you cast it with your wand?

[00:26:21] I do.

[00:26:22] Your mighty wand.

[00:26:26] He's talking about his penis.

[00:26:28] Oh!

[00:26:29] And then I have to take a long rest.

[00:26:34] I'm not a young man of 110 anymore.

[00:26:43] Apparently 4th level spell, I would know Morgankind's Faithful Hound.

[00:26:46] But I don't have 4th level spells yet.

[00:26:49] Why not?

[00:26:50] Because I'm not high enough level.

[00:26:53] Why do you suck?

[00:26:54] No.

[00:26:54] Because someone hasn't given me enough XP.

[00:26:57] Hey.

[00:26:58] That's awesome.

[00:26:59] You're a all-star.

[00:27:00] If you stop getting wrecked by minotaurs, I mean...

[00:27:03] It only happened twice.

[00:27:06] I only got wrecked by a minotaur once and it took 3 of them to do it.

[00:27:09] Oh man, that was horrible.

[00:27:10] I was getting gang banged by 3 of them myself.

[00:27:13] It was so hilarious because he's like, he went up like, we got this.

[00:27:16] I'm just like, I'm gonna go down like a badass.

[00:27:18] And then the things just charged him.

[00:27:19] Whack!

[00:27:20] And then someone, whack!

[00:27:21] The problem was, is I expected that I would be able to one-shot one of them.

[00:27:27] Yeah.

[00:27:28] If I gave it absolutely all of my...

[00:27:32] All of my massive damage bonuses into one hit, I thought I could gank one in one hit.

[00:27:41] No.

[00:27:41] It did not work.

[00:27:42] It did not.

[00:27:43] I did something like 55 damage.

[00:27:45] You got close.

[00:27:46] And it wasn't quite dead.

[00:27:49] Nope.

[00:27:49] It was almost dead.

[00:27:51] And then you were quite dead.

[00:27:53] Yeah.

[00:27:53] Because he was in melee with it.

[00:27:54] Yeah, he went to zero.

[00:27:55] Real fast.

[00:27:56] And then you rolled a 4-2 and you failed it.

[00:27:59] Or not 4-2, you rolled a con save or something.

[00:28:02] Or a...

[00:28:02] Was it strength or con save?

[00:28:03] Whatever you need to do with the withstand like...

[00:28:05] Death saving throw.

[00:28:05] Yeah, a death saving throw.

[00:28:06] And then he just got whipped back like 10 feet, like down past 10.

[00:28:10] Yeah.

[00:28:10] Then I revived him.

[00:28:12] And then...

[00:28:13] You went down.

[00:28:14] I basically gave him the means to get out of the melee combat that we were stuck in.

[00:28:18] And then me and Rob were just tanking the Minotaurs while he went up to deal with the caster and the bowman.

[00:28:25] Yep.

[00:28:28] But I mean, my AC was also really high.

[00:28:31] It was 22.

[00:28:33] Yeah.

[00:28:33] That's a good AC.

[00:28:34] And I got hit by 4 guys consecutively.

[00:28:38] Yeah.

[00:28:38] I rolled really well at the beginning of that fight and then rolled really shitty for the rest.

[00:28:42] Because I could not hit you guys afterward.

[00:28:44] Mm-hmm.

[00:28:45] I had to take my vengeance out on poor Rob.

[00:28:48] Yeah.

[00:28:48] And mostly that was because...

[00:28:49] Like that was actually both out of game because I wanted to like give you guys some kind of like harrowing thing.

[00:28:54] But also in game, the vampire dude was actually just really petty about you guys killing his pet vulture.

[00:29:01] I mean, both Aaron and I died before Rob died.

[00:29:06] Again, it's why I think the title for that session was appropriately named, A Hard Won Payday.

[00:29:12] A Hard Fought Payday.

[00:29:13] Because you guys, it was a hard-fought paycheck.

[00:29:16] Yeah.

[00:29:17] Of like $51,000 gold.

[00:29:20] Mm-hmm.

[00:29:21] That's a big pile of money.

[00:29:22] Yep.

[00:29:23] Well, they really wanted those schematics.

[00:29:28] Mm-hmm.

[00:29:28] Mm-hmm.

[00:29:31] I feel like it's gonna come back to play this.

[00:29:33] Nah.

[00:29:34] Nah.

[00:29:34] When has that ever happened to one of my games, Dave?

[00:29:38] Never.

[00:29:39] Totally never.

[00:29:40] Not gonna happen.

[00:29:43] See, you're agreeing.

[00:29:43] It's on recording.

[00:29:44] I have documentation now.

[00:29:46] But that's my secret.

[00:29:48] I can lie.

[00:29:51] Dammit, he's right.

[00:29:54] Powerless.

[00:29:54] Stop him now.

[00:29:55] It's like that scene from Commando.

[00:29:58] It's like, you know what I said?

[00:29:59] I'd kill you less.

[00:30:00] Yeah, yeah.

[00:30:01] I lied.

[00:30:03] Ahhhh!

[00:30:04] Ahhhh!

[00:30:12] Aaron, are you looking for something specific?

[00:30:15] Not really.

[00:30:16] Okay.

[00:30:17] So you kind of, you have some countermeasures for some of the things you guys are gonna come

[00:30:21] across.

[00:30:22] Yeah, and I could do like detect magic and identify and stuff like that.

[00:30:26] Yeah.

[00:30:28] So, but you guys gotta get there first.

[00:30:31] That's the other thing.

[00:30:32] Mm-hmm.

[00:30:32] You have to get through the Mournlands before you hit Tronj.

[00:30:35] Because Tronj...

[00:30:35] This is why we got the land cart.

[00:30:37] Well, the land cart will give you guys access to like, will help you guys get through the

[00:30:43] mist.

[00:30:44] You won't get lost again.

[00:30:45] You won't get lost in the mist like you did.

[00:30:48] Yeah, it wasn't a good time.

[00:30:49] No.

[00:30:50] No.

[00:30:50] You heard that horrible train.

[00:30:52] Straight up not having a good time.

[00:31:02] Almost did it.

[00:31:03] Yeah.

[00:31:05] That's Chris Pantomime, just throwing everything off the table.

[00:31:07] Yeah.

[00:31:08] For those at home.

[00:31:09] And then almost actually throws it off.

[00:31:10] Yeah.

[00:31:10] So you guys are going south west from Machat down to Tronj.

[00:31:18] Mm-hmm.

[00:31:20] So that's probably about a...

[00:31:22] Where was that?

[00:31:23] Oh, yeah.

[00:31:23] That's about a...

[00:31:24] Probably about four or five hours to Tronj by the land cart.

[00:31:31] So we shall leave at dawn.

[00:31:35] And then it'll give you guys low light because the Mourlands is just basically a very overcast

[00:31:40] day during the day.

[00:31:42] Does it look any different day to night?

[00:31:43] I don't remember.

[00:31:44] It is like gloomy sunset kind of lighting during the day, and then pitch black like moonless

[00:31:51] night during the night because there's just a mist overhead.

[00:31:56] Okay.

[00:31:56] Yeah, let's not do that.

[00:32:00] Fair.

[00:32:03] So for the Vault Door, do I happen to know anything about it?

[00:32:07] The Vault Door, again, it's of the Guild of the Dwarves, as it's a dwarven make.

[00:32:16] It's probably going to have some...

[00:32:20] The easiest way might be to try and see if you guys can find the key cards that the dwarves

[00:32:27] would use to actually manually open it or unlock it.

[00:32:32] Otherwise, you better hope that your Rogue there, or your Rangu...

[00:32:39] Your Rangu can...

[00:32:42] You've got to start referring to us as our combination names from now on.

[00:32:46] Yeah, your Rangu can...

[00:32:49] It's not going to be like picking up a door lock.

[00:32:52] It's going to be a little more involved.

[00:32:56] I do have a pretty substantial lock things.

[00:33:00] Fair.

[00:33:02] Another option, you do know that while the...

[00:33:04] Again, like finding the key cards or having a really high skill in manipulating locks and

[00:33:15] some of that would be ideal, or it would be like one option.

[00:33:18] The other option is these dwarven Vaults were strong, but they can only take so much force

[00:33:26] and power.

[00:33:27] So like a very well-placed, like focused blast of a sufficient like yield would probably

[00:33:35] punch a hole through it.

[00:33:38] Okay.

[00:33:38] Ooh! I can do that!

[00:33:40] Yeah.

[00:33:41] Potentially, yeah.

[00:33:44] It would also have to be a sustained focus blast.

[00:33:47] So we'd have to do like a friendship attack towards it together simultaneously or something.

[00:33:52] You'd have to like...

[00:33:55] Kamehams!

[00:33:57] I don't have a thing that does that.

[00:33:59] I know.

[00:34:01] Or like a couple of those.

[00:34:03] A couple of high skill blocks.

[00:34:05] Oh, actually if I switched out one of my spells for Witch Bolt I could do that.

[00:34:08] Witch Bolt?

[00:34:08] Yeah.

[00:34:09] Yeah, it's basically force lightning.

[00:34:11] Nice.

[00:34:14] Unlimited power!

[00:34:16] It's a concentration spell and basically it just connects you and your opponent by lightning

[00:34:22] and you can keep hitting them every round.

[00:34:25] Yep.

[00:34:25] I actually haven't had a chance to use it yet.

[00:34:28] That sounds fucking awesome.

[00:34:31] Very much a don't tase me bro situation.

[00:34:33] Yeah.

[00:34:34] Or if Dave uses his prismatic orb.

[00:34:39] Like...

[00:34:42] I mean it's not a beam, it's an orb.

[00:34:44] You used it to create a sky beam at one time, didn't you?

[00:34:48] I mean...

[00:34:49] It was a flare.

[00:34:51] I shot a flare into the sky.

[00:34:52] I always think it was like a laser beam.

[00:34:55] It's not, it's an orb.

[00:34:57] It's like a...

[00:34:57] I know it's an orb but like, yeah.

[00:34:59] It's like a Hadouken or...

[00:35:01] A Hadouken.

[00:35:02] An Endocuken.

[00:35:03] If it's Jago from...

[00:35:05] Dan Hibikis?

[00:35:09] What does he call it?

[00:35:12] I don't know Dan's lore enough.

[00:35:17] All I know is that it's pitiful.

[00:35:19] But if you actually connect with it you can actually do good damage.

[00:35:23] That's awesome.

[00:35:24] Okay, so...

[00:35:25] Yeah, that's kind of what you guys get from your...

[00:35:28] The research you spend like a couple hours doing.

[00:35:36] Okay.

[00:35:37] So yeah, you basically...

[00:35:40] By this point it is getting late in the day.

[00:35:43] It's like night time.

[00:35:44] Night is starting to fall on a shot.

[00:35:47] Probably gonna wanna start bright and early the next day then.

[00:35:49] Yeah.

[00:35:51] The sun doesn't shine on the ashat.

[00:35:54] Nope.

[00:35:55] On the ash hole.

[00:36:01] Do you guys want to try and set up any...

[00:36:04] Yeah, so like the ash hole is done and the other building, I think the hunting hall, or the trading post is now done as well.

[00:36:15] At this point.

[00:36:16] Yeah, because it was gonna take like six...

[00:36:17] It was gonna take six days, but then if you guys had the warforges on...

[00:36:21] Like you had like two teams of warforges on the trading post in the ash hole inn.

[00:36:27] That was gonna take like basically like two to three days.

[00:36:30] And that two or three days is up, so that's fine.

[00:36:33] So those ones are done.

[00:36:33] There is still the hunting hall that still needs to be worked on.

[00:36:36] Okay.

[00:36:37] So, have them basically work on that.

[00:36:39] They can probably...

[00:36:40] They have both those teams on that and it's basically gonna get done in a day.

[00:36:43] Nice.

[00:36:45] Okay, so that one will be done by the time you guys get back.

[00:36:49] So, yeah, congrats you have...

[00:36:50] Also you guys have...

[00:36:51] Yeah, and the hunting hall is actually probably gonna be where your new recruits have been...

[00:36:55] Are gonna hang out like the druid, Legolize Greenleaf.

[00:37:00] Legolize Greenleaf.

[00:37:01] And Sam's Club Gamgenes.

[00:37:04] What was Sam's Club Gamgenes?

[00:37:05] No, Stab Jeans.

[00:37:06] Oh, yeah, Stab Jeans, yeah.

[00:37:08] Sam's Club Stab Jeans was a halfling, right?

[00:37:12] A halfling barbarian.

[00:37:13] Yes.

[00:37:15] And he had a spear, I believe.

[00:37:16] Yeah.

[00:37:18] He had a spear.

[00:37:19] Right in the balls.

[00:37:22] They're still hanging from his...

[00:37:24] Your decoration now.

[00:37:26] I do not like that.

[00:37:29] What the fuck happened there?

[00:37:31] I don't appear to carry any weapons anymore.

[00:37:36] That's pretty neat.

[00:37:38] So what'd you do with your weapons?

[00:37:40] Did you just hang them on the wall?

[00:37:42] Yeah, I mean, I still have my warlock implement that acts as a mace.

[00:37:49] Is Mama Abby's just gonna become like an outback steakhouse kind of place where it's just like...

[00:37:54] Basically all your old...

[00:37:56] All the old gear just ends up on the wall.

[00:37:59] Totally.

[00:37:59] There's actually a mannequin in there now with my old armor.

[00:38:02] Yeah.

[00:38:03] It's like that steakhouse place that was in the Pixar fantasy game...

[00:38:10] Fantasy show...

[00:38:11] Or fantasy movie.

[00:38:13] Not Enchanted.

[00:38:14] Outward?

[00:38:15] Outward, yeah.

[00:38:17] It's fantasy land.

[00:38:19] Outward is the video game.

[00:38:21] Outward is the Pixar show, movie.

[00:38:23] Basically it's like a D&D fantasy world that like...

[00:38:27] They...

[00:38:28] Fast forward to the modern day times, but still fantasy races and stuff like that.

[00:38:31] But it's like modern day cars and stuff like that.

[00:38:33] But they basically forgot about magic because technology was easier and anyone can do it.

[00:38:38] And they go to a steakhouse to find the Chimera or the Manticore.

[00:38:43] And the Manticore is actually just the manager of the steakhouse and also the mascot of it.

[00:38:48] And she was once a great warrior.

[00:38:50] But like now she's just got like all her stuff on her trophies and stuff from Dallas.

[00:38:53] Now she works in TGI Fridays.

[00:38:54] Yeah, basically.

[00:38:56] So is that what Mama Abby's gonna end up becoming?

[00:38:58] Where you guys put all your...

[00:39:00] The armor and the trophies and the weapons that are...

[00:39:04] They're cool, but they're not worth too much.

[00:39:07] So you just put them on the wall.

[00:39:09] The Mark I of Rob is on the wall.

[00:39:11] Just his head is like a hunting thing.

[00:39:14] No, it's not.

[00:39:15] Or you just like put them on...

[00:39:16] You assemble but there's like...

[00:39:18] You make basically...

[00:39:19] You bronze a statue of him.

[00:39:21] The goodest boy.

[00:39:22] I copper one.

[00:39:24] Yeah, I copper him.

[00:39:27] No.

[00:39:28] No.

[00:39:29] We make it out of Electrum.

[00:39:31] Would you spare Electrum for that?

[00:39:33] For that?

[00:39:34] It's a pretty noble cause.

[00:39:35] As long as he doesn't keep dying and depleting your Electrum preserves.

[00:39:42] You know you can make Electrum.

[00:39:44] You don't have to use the coins.

[00:39:46] That's true.

[00:39:47] There is a process to make that.

[00:39:49] We'll melt down gold and silver coins in order to make a pool of Electrum.

[00:39:53] Yeah.

[00:39:56] Unfortunately, you're gonna need to build a smithy first.

[00:39:59] Well, there's the next building.

[00:40:01] I think that's more of a foundry.

[00:40:03] But yeah, you know what I mean.

[00:40:05] Yeah.

[00:40:05] And actually, you guys probably should have one since you have a mine nearby.

[00:40:10] Yep.

[00:40:11] But anyways, so yeah.

[00:40:13] We smash cut.

[00:40:14] It is.

[00:40:15] Sorry.

[00:40:15] We should start working towards like some export goods factories.

[00:40:19] Yeah.

[00:40:20] Well, you guys have the trading post in the hunting hall, so.

[00:40:24] Yeah.

[00:40:24] Though there's not much to hunt around here, aside from like going out into the plain, into

[00:40:28] the deserts and plains to the east.

[00:40:30] Like a factory.

[00:40:31] Or going to the Mornlands to the west or the lake to the north, which you guys have

[00:40:35] heard rumors of like strange lights and creatures in the lake.

[00:40:38] We could fish shit out of it.

[00:40:40] Straight up to the monster hunter in the lake.

[00:40:42] Yeah.

[00:40:43] A lot of weird mutated things coming out of the Mornlands coastline.

[00:40:46] Mm-hmm.

[00:40:47] I'm thinking bobbleheads.

[00:40:50] Uh-huh.

[00:40:51] Or afford bobbleheads.

[00:40:52] Oh my god.

[00:40:53] All right.

[00:40:54] I like where this is going.

[00:40:57] All right.

[00:40:58] Weird, but okay.

[00:41:01] Okay.

[00:41:02] But he can make homunculi.

[00:41:04] So they're actually alive.

[00:41:05] Bobblehead.

[00:41:06] They're actually alive.

[00:41:07] Oh my god.

[00:41:08] I love that.

[00:41:10] I like it.

[00:41:11] I like it a lot.

[00:41:11] What's the, what's, so like what's this like company going to be called?

[00:41:14] This toy company going to be called?

[00:41:16] Punky O' Pop.

[00:41:18] Punky O' Pop.

[00:41:21] Hamunko.

[00:41:23] Hamunko.

[00:41:25] Okay.

[00:41:26] That's when you guys get back.

[00:41:28] Okay.

[00:41:29] That's where we turn this into a, uh, what is it?

[00:41:32] An economic horror.

[00:41:34] Yeah.

[00:41:34] This is where we turn it into an economic, into a straight up just like city management

[00:41:39] and like, and you know, managing various businesses and such.

[00:41:42] I mean, we're going to have all these warforges that aren't going to be doing anything, right?

[00:41:46] Might as well have them in the factories, am I right?

[00:41:50] You gotta do something with them.

[00:41:51] How dare you?

[00:41:52] I'm right here.

[00:41:56] Idle clanking paws are the devils playthings.

[00:42:00] I mean, Lord of Blades was left to his own devices and look what happened.

[00:42:06] Exactly.

[00:42:07] Yeah, but he's a dick.

[00:42:09] That's true.

[00:42:10] That's true.

[00:42:13] He's close.

[00:42:14] I really hope that he never enters the ash hole.

[00:42:18] We really don't want him inside our ash hole.

[00:42:21] Okay.

[00:42:22] So smash cut.

[00:42:23] It's the next morning.

[00:42:24] This is what you guys were talking about while you were drinking that night.

[00:42:27] Like getting prepped and stuff.

[00:42:29] You hear, not a rooster call, like at the strike of noon, the strike of dawn.

[00:42:41] Crack of noon?

[00:42:42] Sorry, thank you.

[00:42:42] Crack of dawn.

[00:42:43] Instead of a rooster at the crack of dawn, you hear hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee.

[00:42:47] Just bellow across the land, across the shot.

[00:42:51] What's the excuse he thinks is when he wakes up?

[00:42:52] He just immediately does that?

[00:42:53] Yeah, he gets up and he like stretches.

[00:42:55] And then he's just like...

[00:42:55] HEE HE HEE HEH HEH HEH HEH

[00:42:58] The mines that he's made is shaped like a funnel.

[00:43:02] It's just like a horn.

[00:43:05] Mangy Carl.

[00:43:07] It's Gnarly Gnarl, thank you.

[00:43:08] I know.

[00:43:11] This incarnation of Mangy Carl?

[00:43:13] So you guys get up and have some...

[00:43:19] Well, for the

[00:43:21] fleshies of you have food

[00:43:23] and breakfast and such.

[00:43:25] Oh, right.

[00:43:26] Because you're a people too, so you have to eat.

[00:43:29] Mm-hmm.

[00:43:31] Yeah, you're not the weird one anymore. I'm the weird one now.

[00:43:34] Yeah.

[00:43:35] The squirrel is still

[00:43:36] like pops under your bag of holding

[00:43:39] from time to time. Yeah, he's riding on the back

[00:43:41] of Rob as we're like preparing

[00:43:43] stuff, bringing stuff to the cart. Yeah.

[00:43:45] Mama Abby comes out and she's like

[00:43:47] it's like, well, I hope you have

[00:43:50] safe travels out there

[00:43:51] in the Morelands and

[00:43:53] please come back safe.

[00:43:55] But also come back lucrative.

[00:43:58] That is the plan.

[00:43:59] One way or the other, we will

[00:44:01] either come back safe or safe and lucrative.

[00:44:03] Or maybe just lucrative.

[00:44:05] That's entirely possible too.

[00:44:07] Yeah. Based on the last time

[00:44:09] it did not go so well.

[00:44:11] Not the last time, but the last last time.

[00:44:13] And

[00:44:15] Mama Abby actually

[00:44:16] just comes in and gives you guys all a hug.

[00:44:19] No.

[00:44:19] No.

[00:44:20] She's gonna, like, again,

[00:44:21] as she's seeing you off and you

[00:44:23] definitely think she's holding back some tears.

[00:44:27] Seems like we're about to die.

[00:44:29] Yeah, this makes you nervous.

[00:44:30] You guys are going into the Morelands.

[00:44:32] For the second time.

[00:44:33] And you

[00:44:35] told her what happened last time.

[00:44:36] It was

[00:44:37] fine.

[00:44:38] It wasn't that bad.

[00:44:40] It wasn't.

[00:44:41] It was just the return after the first time

[00:44:43] that sucked.

[00:44:44] Yeah.

[00:44:44] Did you die?

[00:44:47] I mean, yes.

[00:44:48] Yes.

[00:44:49] I got better.

[00:44:50] I got better.

[00:44:51] Yeah.

[00:44:52] But yeah, so you guys hop into your

[00:44:53] land cart.

[00:44:56] And

[00:44:57] What does our land cart look like?

[00:44:59] Yeah, what does this land cart look like, guys?

[00:45:03] It's an elementally bound,

[00:45:04] so it doesn't need a

[00:45:06] horses at the front.

[00:45:07] But it does have a steer,

[00:45:08] like a kind of a sitting,

[00:45:09] like one of those little front benches

[00:45:11] for steering and stuff.

[00:45:13] Can it be a hot rod chariot?

[00:45:16] A hot rod chariot?

[00:45:18] Yes.

[00:45:19] It's got two hot rods in front

[00:45:20] with a chariot behind.

[00:45:21] You just steer it from the...

[00:45:23] Oh, like those motorcycle chariots

[00:45:25] that I keep seeing?

[00:45:27] Motorcycle chariots are funny.

[00:45:29] Oh, yeah.

[00:45:30] Basically, people make a chariot,

[00:45:32] and then instead of horses in the front,

[00:45:34] it's two motorcycles

[00:45:36] that have an articulated bar

[00:45:41] between them.

[00:45:42] Oh, they're not dudes riding motorcycles.

[00:45:44] Not dudes riding motorcycles.

[00:45:45] And then there's literally just...

[00:45:48] Rains.

[00:45:48] The reins are tied to the throttle handles

[00:45:52] on the motorcycles.

[00:45:54] Yeah.

[00:45:55] Really?

[00:45:55] Apparently...

[00:45:55] Okay, so look at...

[00:45:56] So what, the reins just adjust the speed

[00:45:58] of each motorcycle?

[00:46:00] Pretty much.

[00:46:00] And kind of turn it a little bit?

[00:46:02] Yeah.

[00:46:03] Weird, but also badass.

[00:46:06] Yeah, you could...

[00:46:07] Maybe not the motorcycles,

[00:46:09] because again, like...

[00:46:10] Because this does have front wheels,

[00:46:11] like, and basically where the horses would be,

[00:46:13] there are actually like some protruding front wheels

[00:46:16] from what I'm seeing of a layup for a land cart.

[00:46:20] So they might be like...

[00:46:22] You could even have kind of like wheel protectors

[00:46:25] that kind of look like...

[00:46:27] Horses.

[00:46:28] Horses, yeah.

[00:46:29] Or like they're kind of like curved and stuff like that.

[00:46:31] Sort of like an Art Deco-y kind of design.

[00:46:33] Mm-hmm.

[00:46:36] And yeah, like once you activate the...

[00:46:38] Say the magic word, literally,

[00:46:40] to activate the elemental to start moving and such,

[00:46:44] the wheels do suddenly become encrusted

[00:46:46] with like rock and crystal and such

[00:46:48] and start like moving at their own accord.

[00:46:50] Yeah.

[00:46:52] Generally speaking, the construction of them

[00:46:54] is like a covered carriage though, right?

[00:46:56] Generally, yeah.

[00:46:57] Like it would be sitting inside.

[00:46:58] Yeah, but you can also like design them

[00:46:59] to be a little bit more like flare,

[00:47:01] with a little more flare.

[00:47:02] Mm-hmm.

[00:47:03] Would we be towing a cart behind it?

[00:47:07] I don't know how much we...

[00:47:08] I heard you like...

[00:47:08] I know you could, yeah,

[00:47:09] but I'm just like,

[00:47:10] yo, dog, I heard you like carts,

[00:47:11] so I put a cart behind your cart.

[00:47:12] Yeah, because like,

[00:47:12] I don't know how much we're taking if it's...

[00:47:14] Because there's going to be three and a half of us.

[00:47:19] It is a...

[00:47:20] Like there would be potentially two people

[00:47:22] setting up front, one person and then second.

[00:47:23] I would say a land cart can hold up to...

[00:47:27] eight people inside on the benches.

[00:47:29] Inside?

[00:47:30] Yeah.

[00:47:30] Not counting the people outside.

[00:47:31] And then one person at the steerage,

[00:47:33] or two people at the steerage,

[00:47:34] if you really want to.

[00:47:35] So it's basically a VW minibus.

[00:47:37] Basically, yeah.

[00:47:38] You got the mystery machine of Eberron.

[00:47:41] Nice.

[00:47:42] Okay, then we're going to lean into that

[00:47:43] and actually make it the mystery machine.

[00:47:45] I really think that...

[00:47:47] The Enigma engine.

[00:47:49] Enigma engine, yeah.

[00:47:50] I really think that we should consider

[00:47:56] an off-road version of this.

[00:48:00] Ah, hell yeah.

[00:48:01] Okay.

[00:48:01] That's like a...

[00:48:02] Is that the cool steampunk car from...

[00:48:06] Captain America?

[00:48:08] I was thinking Captain America.

[00:48:08] I was thinking the one from

[00:48:10] League of Extraordinary Gentlemen.

[00:48:12] Oh, yeah.

[00:48:13] Yeah, it's the same car.

[00:48:14] Yeah, it's the same kind of looking car

[00:48:15] with the extra wheels on the back and stuff.

[00:48:17] Yeah, the six by six.

[00:48:18] Yeah.

[00:48:19] That's pretty cool.

[00:48:20] Yeah, it could be like that.

[00:48:21] An off-road version of that.

[00:48:23] So it's like Mad Max-ified, basically.

[00:48:26] Yeah.

[00:48:26] Jacked up a little bit.

[00:48:27] Has an extra...

[00:48:28] Has kind of a back area,

[00:48:30] like a bed area that is covered.

[00:48:32] Yeah, it has speakers on it.

[00:48:33] There's an electric guitar there.

[00:48:34] Wait, so is it just...

[00:48:36] Like that version of a...

[00:48:39] What's the...

[00:48:41] It's a car, but it also has a pickup in the back.

[00:48:44] The Baja?

[00:48:45] No, no, no.

[00:48:45] The El Camino?

[00:48:46] The El Camino, yeah.

[00:48:47] It's an El Camino.

[00:48:48] I like it.

[00:48:50] Or Subaru Va.

[00:48:51] The path.

[00:48:51] Subaru Va.

[00:48:53] I like the steampunk El Camino.

[00:48:55] I think that's cool.

[00:48:55] All right, all right.

[00:48:56] I'm for it.

[00:48:57] This is the way.

[00:48:58] This is the way.

[00:48:59] This is the way.

[00:49:00] Also, because El Camino, I'm pretty sure, means the path.

[00:49:02] Yeah.

[00:49:04] So what is it called?

[00:49:04] The way?

[00:49:05] Yeah.

[00:49:09] Okay.

[00:49:11] Because it is the way for us to get in there as well.

[00:49:13] It is.

[00:49:14] It is.

[00:49:14] This is the only way to get through the Borderlands.

[00:49:16] Well, I mean, it's not the only way, but...

[00:49:18] It's the only safe way.

[00:49:19] It's the safest way, yeah.

[00:49:20] We should definitely still tow a trailer.

[00:49:21] Yeah.

[00:49:22] That can be called the Enigma Engine.

[00:49:24] All right.

[00:49:25] Because it was like, basically, you were describing it as like a Volkswagen, like, butt, like, wagon.

[00:49:30] I was like, so it's the Mystery Machine.

[00:49:33] Also known as the Enigma Engine.

[00:49:35] Yeah.

[00:49:35] Yeah.

[00:49:36] Okay.

[00:49:37] Okay.

[00:49:37] Because you guys can grab, like, one of the carts.

[00:49:39] Your town has a couple of them.

[00:49:41] Well, yeah.

[00:49:41] I mean, I bought one.

[00:49:43] Yeah.

[00:49:44] To go with Donkey.

[00:49:45] With Donkey, yeah.

[00:49:47] Your mage bred donkey.

[00:49:49] Mm-hmm.

[00:49:49] That we haven't seen since the first episode.

[00:49:51] Having used.

[00:49:52] Having used him.

[00:49:53] He's living his best life in the barn.

[00:49:54] Yeah.

[00:49:55] I'm pretty sure my horse is dead.

[00:49:57] Your horse is here, too.

[00:49:58] Really?

[00:49:59] Yeah, sure.

[00:50:00] He made it into the mines?

[00:50:02] Yeah, sure.

[00:50:02] Okay.

[00:50:03] Yeah.

[00:50:03] Should we bring him along?

[00:50:05] Would it be handy to have a horse, just in case we need it?

[00:50:08] Like, tie him to everything.

[00:50:10] Like, this thing doesn't go fast.

[00:50:11] It goes pretty fast.

[00:50:13] The horse is not good.

[00:50:13] It doesn't have to go fast.

[00:50:14] It doesn't have to go fast, but it can go fast.

[00:50:16] Yeah.

[00:50:17] It doesn't, but it can go.

[00:50:19] Donkey is pretty fast.

[00:50:20] Yeah, Donkey is a mage bred, so they go, they're, like, a level larger, and they're also,

[00:50:25] like, ten, like, they're, like, ten feet faster than an average horse, or than an average

[00:50:29] animal.

[00:50:30] Basically, he's a donkey the size of a draft horse.

[00:50:33] Hmm.

[00:50:34] And moves, I think...

[00:50:35] And moves at 50 feet.

[00:50:36] Yeah.

[00:50:37] Yeah, I think it was, like, ten or twenty feet.

[00:50:39] Yeah, it's a bonus of ten.

[00:50:41] So he's a jacked ass.

[00:50:43] Yeah.

[00:50:43] He's a jacked ass.

[00:50:44] He's a jacked ass.

[00:50:45] Goddamn.

[00:50:47] I was gonna name him just my fine black ass.

[00:50:50] Mm-hmm.

[00:50:51] I like it.

[00:50:51] But instead, I went with Don K.

[00:50:55] Yeah.

[00:50:57] Oh, yeah, so you can have Don K in the back as well.

[00:51:00] Okay.

[00:51:00] Like, or, like, coming with you guys.

[00:51:02] It might, uh, the trip might be a little bit, maybe about six hours rather than five, but...

[00:51:06] That's fine.

[00:51:07] Because you're going a little bit slower than normal, but...

[00:51:10] We should get a trailer that is, like, a horse trailer.

[00:51:15] We should.

[00:51:15] Yeah, because we could just have his horse and Don K just in that and then tow that.

[00:51:20] Then we have the deployable mounts.

[00:51:23] He's becoming more and more like a convoy.

[00:51:25] Yeah.

[00:51:26] A hundred percent.

[00:51:27] It's a train.

[00:51:27] It's a land train.

[00:51:28] It's literally a land...

[00:51:29] Like, what is the Oregon Trail, like, train?

[00:51:31] Like, a wagon train.

[00:51:33] It's literally like a wagon train.

[00:51:35] A little bit, yeah.

[00:51:37] As long as it's not Oregon Trail.

[00:51:38] No.

[00:51:39] You gotta afford that, Rupert.

[00:51:41] I'm sorry.

[00:51:42] What if you do?

[00:51:42] What you do, you die.

[00:51:43] I'm sorry.

[00:51:44] The Warforged died of dysentery.

[00:51:47] Yeah, totally.

[00:51:49] We ran into a mage named Terry and made fun of his name.

[00:51:52] Went badly.

[00:51:53] Like this man.

[00:51:59] Lucy.

[00:52:00] What are you doing?

[00:52:00] The mage friend donkey is my paladin mount.

[00:52:06] Yeah, that checks out.

[00:52:08] Come on.

[00:52:09] Lucy.

[00:52:10] I mean, it's faster than most horses.

[00:52:14] Yep.

[00:52:15] Yep.

[00:52:15] Over here.

[00:52:16] Come on.

[00:52:16] Go hang out with...

[00:52:17] Here.

[00:52:19] I mean, did you just go with a donkey?

[00:52:22] Well, and part of the reason why I had to go with a donkey is because it raises the size

[00:52:26] category of the animal.

[00:52:27] So if I went with a horse, then it wouldn't be a large creature anymore.

[00:52:32] It would be huge.

[00:52:33] He would look like a baby on it.

[00:52:35] He's got huge...

[00:52:36] It would be like putting a pigeon on the back of a draft horse.

[00:52:40] You could have also just got a pony.

[00:52:42] A mage bred pony.

[00:52:43] And then it's just a horse.

[00:52:45] It's just a better horse.

[00:52:48] I saw these at Metro today.

[00:52:50] I was like...

[00:52:51] Yes.

[00:52:52] What is it?

[00:52:53] Amaretti's.

[00:52:53] Almond cookies.

[00:52:54] Italian almond cookies.

[00:52:55] I'll try one.

[00:52:57] Hey, friend.

[00:52:58] Actually, I respectfully decline.

[00:53:00] I'll take his.

[00:53:02] You do that.

[00:53:04] You can pass me the attention.

[00:53:05] Go like...

[00:53:07] Semi-circles?

[00:53:08] Yeah.

[00:53:08] Oh, my God.

[00:53:16] Are you guys actually...

[00:53:17] You guys just using the...

[00:53:19] Putting one cart behind your elementally bound lane cart?

[00:53:24] And also donkey?

[00:53:26] In the cart.

[00:53:27] Yeah.

[00:53:28] Is he going to be in the cart?

[00:53:29] Like...

[00:53:30] Sure.

[00:53:30] Take the horse.

[00:53:32] Okay.

[00:53:36] And...

[00:53:37] Yeah.

[00:53:37] A couple of townspeople.

[00:53:38] So you guys will hop.

[00:53:41] And you go through your new wall.

[00:53:43] Your newly erected walls and the gate to the east.

[00:53:47] Or the gate to the west.

[00:53:49] Right.

[00:53:49] Because we did that.

[00:53:50] Yes, we did.

[00:53:52] And you start heading that kilometer or so toward the dead mists.

[00:54:00] And shortly after that, you pass through the skull-forming mists of the Mourlands.

[00:54:09] And...

[00:54:09] Robo saves!

[00:54:12] He's not the rule of survivals.

[00:54:13] We still have the rule of will.

[00:54:15] Okay.

[00:54:17] By the way, I don't remember.

[00:54:18] Aaron, do you have any weapons infused by me right now?

[00:54:23] Any items infused by me?

[00:54:25] Are you using my infusion slots or am I just using them for myself right now?

[00:54:30] I was using my shield.

[00:54:33] Yes.

[00:54:34] But now I have a better shield.

[00:54:35] Yeah.

[00:54:36] Your shield's plus two.

[00:54:37] Which means it's a magical thing.

[00:54:38] Which means I can't infuse it anymore, right?

[00:54:40] That'd be a wisdom.

[00:54:42] That's a wisdom.

[00:54:42] That's a wisdom.

[00:54:43] Sorry, that's a wisdom.

[00:54:44] Ten.

[00:54:46] Okay.

[00:54:47] Okay, so my quick question.

[00:54:49] Would you like an infused item?

[00:54:51] Do you have a non-magical weapon that you would like infused?

[00:54:53] Or arm...

[00:54:54] Eighteen?

[00:54:54] Okay.

[00:54:56] I can basically give you plus one AC.

[00:54:59] I can give you plus one attack, plus one damage.

[00:55:02] Or I can give you a repeating shot for like a bow where you don't have to load it.

[00:55:10] Why not?

[00:55:10] It's a long bow.

[00:55:12] Because he uses a long bow.

[00:55:13] No, but like...

[00:55:14] Repeating shots only for crossbows.

[00:55:17] No, it's for any range thing.

[00:55:20] It's basically...

[00:55:23] Actually, is it only for crossbows?

[00:55:25] It basically...

[00:55:26] You sure?

[00:55:27] Because crossbows take a minor to load.

[00:55:31] A bonus action to reload.

[00:55:35] I thought it would just make it so like you're just summoning arrows.

[00:55:39] No.

[00:55:40] Like, so you can do two attacks per action if you have that.

[00:55:45] You can anyway with a bow.

[00:55:46] Really?

[00:55:48] So what's the...

[00:55:49] Why would you crossbow?

[00:55:50] Why would you crossbow is what I'm trying to say.

[00:55:53] Better damage.

[00:55:54] Oh.

[00:55:55] Hmm.

[00:55:56] And better range.

[00:55:57] Okay.

[00:55:58] Yeah.

[00:55:59] Fair enough.

[00:55:59] Really?

[00:56:00] You got a long bow?

[00:56:01] Um, long bow is like 30, 60.

[00:56:05] If you get a heavy crossbow.

[00:56:07] There's like...

[00:56:08] Because the heavy crossbow versus the long bow.

[00:56:12] The crossbow is a die 10 of damage.

[00:56:15] And the long bow is a die 8.

[00:56:16] Now, did you roll your wisdom skip?

[00:56:19] Yeah.

[00:56:19] Long bow, 150, 600.

[00:56:21] That's a long way.

[00:56:22] Mm-hmm.

[00:56:23] Although if you want to give me a plus 1 on that, that'd be great.

[00:56:26] Nat 20.

[00:56:27] Jesus.

[00:56:28] Okay.

[00:56:28] What are we doing today?

[00:56:29] Yeah.

[00:56:31] This is fine.

[00:56:32] No, this is pretty good.

[00:56:33] The crossbow is only 100, 400.

[00:56:35] Yeah.

[00:56:35] So it's not as long.

[00:56:40] So...

[00:56:40] It's also not as bow.

[00:56:41] For Finn and for, um...

[00:56:45] For Copper.

[00:56:47] The trip goes...

[00:56:48] Like, it's...

[00:56:49] It feels kind of crappy.

[00:56:51] Like, you're in this fog and you get this kind of weird sense of dread.

[00:56:55] But otherwise, it goes by pretty smoothly.

[00:56:57] Maybe like...

[00:56:58] It's maybe like a 15, 20 minute trip through the mist before you guys exit out of the mist.

[00:57:02] However, for Kirk...

[00:57:05] Kirkless.

[00:57:06] This is very much in character.

[00:57:07] You are not...

[00:57:09] You're feeling itchy.

[00:57:11] You're like...

[00:57:11] You're pretty sure...

[00:57:13] You're not sweating.

[00:57:14] It feels like the mist is sticking to your skin.

[00:57:18] And...

[00:57:19] Was that a train?

[00:57:20] Not a game.

[00:57:22] You hear...

[00:57:22] You think you hear a train off in the distance.

[00:57:24] And the screamings and moanings underlying the train whistle of dozens of people.

[00:57:32] Shouting to be let on...

[00:57:34] Shouting to be let in.

[00:57:36] And it goes...

[00:57:38] It feels...

[00:57:38] That 20 to 15, 20 minutes feels like an eternity.

[00:57:41] But eventually, you guys exit out of the fog and you see the desolate landscape beyond.

[00:57:46] And you're like...

[00:57:47] Oh, thank God.

[00:57:48] Oh, shit.

[00:57:50] You're out of the frying pan, but into the fire.

[00:57:53] Yeah, we're still in the moorlands.

[00:57:55] Yeah.

[00:57:57] Still not very bueno.

[00:57:59] Because the light crossbow is actually equivalent to a longbow.

[00:58:03] The range is different, but the light crossbow does the same amount of damage.

[00:58:06] Got it.

[00:58:07] And the light crossbow is considered a simple weapon, so more people are proficient with it.

[00:58:11] Alright.

[00:58:12] That makes sense.

[00:58:14] But as you guys...

[00:58:16] So you want to give me that plus one in my longbow?

[00:58:19] Yeah, sure.

[00:58:20] Just so...

[00:58:20] Basically, in the preparation phase before we even left, during my rest period, I had

[00:58:27] your bow while I was doing a rest and I put an infusion on it, basically.

[00:58:30] Perfect.

[00:58:33] No, it was less than 10 to it.

[00:58:36] That'll do it.

[00:58:37] Oh, can you enchant my thieves tools?

[00:58:42] Not with a way that I know that I can yet, no.

[00:58:45] Alright.

[00:58:45] I only know four infusions.

[00:58:47] That's not one of them.

[00:58:48] Fair.

[00:58:51] When do I get more infusions?

[00:58:54] I'll check to see how long it takes.

[00:58:55] Oh yeah, it's about three and a half hours, it says from...

[00:58:58] Yeah.

[00:58:59] Yeah, so that's how long it was from Rose Quarry to Whitehearth.

[00:59:03] And this one's a little bit longer, distance-wise, so...

[00:59:07] So yeah, you guys are in this desolate region.

[00:59:13] Actually, as you guys...

[00:59:15] As the fog clears up, Kirk, you feel better, kind of.

[00:59:22] You're still itchy all over.

[00:59:25] Copper, though, your mood kind of sours, because you know...

[00:59:28] It's dead.

[00:59:30] There's not much greenery in this area.

[00:59:33] But you recognize what was once beautiful, lush pastoral land.

[00:59:37] Yeah.

[00:59:38] And you can see the dead city ahead of...

[00:59:40] Like a couple...

[00:59:42] Like some ways off in the distance.

[00:59:44] That was once the city you protected.

[00:59:46] Yeah.

[00:59:47] And you walked away from.

[00:59:49] And yeah, so your mood kind of sours.

[00:59:52] A little bit, yeah.

[00:59:52] As soon as everything clears up from the fog.

[00:59:56] I call Rob over and pick him up.

[01:00:00] It can happen eventually.

[01:00:02] Comfort.exe.

[01:00:05] Initiating comfort subroutines.

[01:00:06] Yeah.

[01:00:08] And yeah, you start...

[01:00:10] The elemental cart is unperturbed, so it continues shuffling along with Donkey.

[01:00:16] Okay.

[01:00:18] And uh...

[01:00:20] Actually...

[01:00:22] Donkey was in the cart, right?

[01:00:24] Okay.

[01:00:25] Yeah, Donkey's fine.

[01:00:29] You're gonna make me lose my beige bread mount that I never got to use.

[01:00:33] Yep.

[01:00:36] Hi, I'm Chris.

[01:00:36] I don't know if we've met as a GM before.

[01:00:40] Ah, it's nice to meet you, Chris.

[01:00:42] Nice.

[01:00:42] With the eyes at home, Aaron was gonna shake my hand with a knife in his palm.

[01:00:49] Very obviously.

[01:00:51] Obviously, yes.

[01:00:52] Very obviously.

[01:00:53] It was a joke.

[01:00:54] Or was it?

[01:00:59] But yeah, so you guys track for a little bit.

[01:01:03] What's your passive perceptions?

[01:01:07] 12.

[01:01:07] 12.

[01:01:08] 16.

[01:01:09] 16.

[01:01:10] Well...

[01:01:10] Actually, I might be 14.

[01:01:13] No, I'm 13.

[01:01:14] Okay.

[01:01:16] So you guys are about two hours into your trek.

[01:01:19] You're going through, again, some rolling dead hills.

[01:01:25] The city is getting closer.

[01:01:28] Because you can see some of the spires at the center of the city.

[01:01:31] Or the skeletons of them.

[01:01:35] And that's when all of you guys notice or hear the sounds of movement off to the side.

[01:01:43] Like off of a ridge.

[01:01:45] Like you hear some rocks falling off the ridge.

[01:01:50] Gun it.

[01:01:54] You're gonna gun it?

[01:01:55] Like we're already going full speed.

[01:01:56] Were you guys going full speed?

[01:01:57] I think you guys were going a little slow.

[01:01:59] We were going to go slow because Donkey would have been tied to it.

[01:02:03] Right.

[01:02:04] Okay.

[01:02:04] So you guys, but now that Donkey is inside the cart, you guys were going to the right

[01:02:08] speed?

[01:02:08] Or a decent speed?

[01:02:10] Mm-hmm.

[01:02:10] Okay.

[01:02:10] Well, you can push the land cart a little bit.

[01:02:13] Okay.

[01:02:15] Okay.

[01:02:15] So you start doing that.

[01:02:16] And shortly after, you hear the, like, whirring and mechanical footfalls of iron steeds with

[01:02:27] bladed and spiked warforges just coming in from the back.

[01:02:32] Oh my god.

[01:02:34] And they're just, like, letting out, like, horrible, like, mechanical calls at you.

[01:02:38] And a couple of, like, spikes start, like, launching towards you guys.

[01:02:44] How far away are they?

[01:02:45] At this point, they're about, because you had that advantage of, like, hearing them and such,

[01:02:51] they're about 50 to 60 feet behind you guys.

[01:02:54] You let them get that close.

[01:02:56] Yeah.

[01:02:56] Cool.

[01:02:57] Thorn whip.

[01:02:58] Pull him off his mount.

[01:03:00] Okay.

[01:03:01] Yeah.

[01:03:01] Does it go that far?

[01:03:02] It's, I have a spell sniper, which enhances my range quite a bit, I believe.

[01:03:07] Okay.

[01:03:08] Uh.

[01:03:10] No, they were long ago for me.

[01:03:12] Yeah.

[01:03:13] Yeah.

[01:03:13] I don't have the standard.

[01:03:14] And I will say, like, it's 50 to 60 feet, but you guys, they, you are, like, you are pushing

[01:03:19] away from them.

[01:03:21] Yeah.

[01:03:22] So we're going faster.

[01:03:22] So, like, every round, they're going to be farther and farther.

[01:03:25] Oh, so we are losing them.

[01:03:26] Yeah.

[01:03:26] But if you want to try and pick them off before.

[01:03:29] Yep.

[01:03:29] Y'all take some flash shots.

[01:03:31] Okay.

[01:03:32] Me too.

[01:03:40] Thorn whip's 30.

[01:03:43] Can you Google what spell sniper does for range?

[01:03:48] It's not in this book.

[01:03:49] It'll be in the base book.

[01:03:51] So I was probably in the cart, yes?

[01:03:52] Yeah, we all are.

[01:03:53] So I'm firing out of a slit or something like that, yes?

[01:03:56] Probably out the back.

[01:03:57] So they can't see me, right?

[01:04:00] No, actually, the one that's kind of in their range is probably the donkey in the second

[01:04:05] in the back cart.

[01:04:07] When you cast a spell that requires you to make an attack roll, the spell is going to

[01:04:10] range is doubled.

[01:04:11] Oh, doubled.

[01:04:12] Oh, wow.

[01:04:13] So I can reach.

[01:04:14] Your range spell attacks ignore half cover and three quarters cover.

[01:04:17] Oh, it's a range spell attack.

[01:04:18] Thrift whips and melee.

[01:04:20] So they don't know it's coming.

[01:04:21] I should have advantage on this.

[01:04:23] Yep.

[01:04:23] Excellent.

[01:04:25] I'll take the lead target.

[01:04:27] That's 29 to hit.

[01:04:29] 29.

[01:04:30] That will hit.

[01:04:33] That's sneak attack damage.

[01:04:35] Nice longbow.

[01:04:38] And what kind of creatures are they?

[01:04:40] They are warforged.

[01:04:42] So I think I have...

[01:04:44] Constructs.

[01:04:45] Favorite enemy.

[01:04:46] But favorite enemy doesn't really do that in this game.

[01:04:49] Oh, no?

[01:04:51] Oh, shit.

[01:04:52] I just realized too.

[01:04:54] The lefty tracks them better.

[01:04:56] Yeah.

[01:04:59] Oh, I rolled poorly.

[01:05:02] Ten damage.

[01:05:04] Ten damage?

[01:05:05] Okay.

[01:05:07] I will roll something.

[01:05:10] Your bow is a simple or martial weapon?

[01:05:12] Yes.

[01:05:12] Okay.

[01:05:13] Then that's fine.

[01:05:13] You get plus one attack and plus to hit.

[01:05:15] So your arrow strikes and you see the warforged flail off his iron steed and fall off.

[01:05:22] However, shortly after he starts getting up.

[01:05:24] So you didn't quite kill him, but you knocked him off his horse.

[01:05:27] That's all I'm really going to.

[01:05:28] Yeah, for sure.

[01:05:30] Are we going to roll an issue at this point?

[01:05:31] At this point, yeah.

[01:05:32] I'm rolling an issue.

[01:05:33] Yep.

[01:05:47] 22.

[01:05:49] 22, you said.

[01:05:50] Also 22.

[01:05:52] 14!

[01:05:53] Not 22.

[01:05:58] What was...

[01:06:00] 22, 22, and 14.

[01:06:01] Oh, yours was also 23.

[01:06:03] Yes.

[01:06:03] Oddly enough.

[01:06:04] So whoever has higher decks goes up, which is probably you.

[01:06:07] 19.

[01:06:08] Plus 4.

[01:06:10] Yeah.

[01:06:11] Hang on, I've got to roll these guys now.

[01:06:14] Fortunately, there's only two of them left now.

[01:06:16] Because one of them has got eight dirt.

[01:06:18] One thing I forgot to do when I leveled up last is, because I'm 6th level, I have access

[01:06:22] to more infusions.

[01:06:23] 6th level infusions, like Boots of the Winding Path.

[01:06:26] Radiant Weapon.

[01:06:28] Radiant Weapon?

[01:06:32] Radiant Weapon?

[01:06:32] I'm a paladin.

[01:06:34] Yeah.

[01:06:36] Radiant Weapon gives plus 1 to attack and damage rolls made with it while holding up the Wheeler

[01:06:40] can take a bonus action to shed light from it in a 30 foot radius.

[01:06:44] Can you use Eldritch Blast for the Radiant Weapon though?

[01:06:48] Because that just feels wrong.

[01:06:50] I know.

[01:06:52] That's part of what my build is, man.

[01:06:54] Just feels so wrong.

[01:06:55] He's been letting them do it, so yes, it works.

[01:07:00] Dude, I'm going to take Eldritch Smite soon, so that I can put regular Smite and Eldritch

[01:07:05] on the same attacks.

[01:07:08] You're waiting to eat Necrotic?

[01:07:10] Yeah.

[01:07:11] Okay.

[01:07:13] Hold my dog down this way.

[01:07:15] So, you guys are now 70 feet away from the Warforged.

[01:07:28] Oh, it's raining.

[01:07:29] Oh, jeez.

[01:07:31] Hold on.

[01:07:32] That doesn't sound very nice.

[01:07:35] Yeah, Porta Luce is all in there.

[01:07:36] The Pulsion Shield.

[01:07:38] That's cute.

[01:07:39] Hang on.

[01:07:40] Hang on.

[01:07:40] Loose.

[01:07:41] Also, any of these replicate magic items useful?

[01:07:47] Boots of the Elvenkind, Cloak of Elvenkind, Cloak of the Manta Ray, Eyes of Charming, Gloves

[01:07:53] of Thievery, probably any.

[01:07:55] Gloves of Thievery, probably.

[01:07:56] Lantern of Revealing, Pipes of Haunting, Ring of Water Walking.

[01:08:00] Ring of Water Walking is handy, but not really very situational.

[01:08:05] Can you see what this description on these Gloves of Thieves is?

[01:08:08] Gloves of Thievery.

[01:08:14] Absolutely, I can.

[01:08:18] I have notebooks.

[01:08:22] Gloves of Thievery.

[01:08:23] Infotionally illiterate.

[01:08:24] Even.

[01:08:25] These Gloves are invisible while worn.

[01:08:28] While wearing them, you gain a plus 5 bonus to Dexterity Slight Hand Checks, and Dexterity

[01:08:33] Checks made to pick locks.

[01:08:34] Oh, I can really use those.

[01:08:36] Yeah.

[01:08:36] How long does that take to make?

[01:08:38] Replicating items I can do pretty quick.

[01:08:41] Okay, so 70 feet.

[01:08:43] The Warfords that you knocked out, or knocked down off of this thing, he made a roll.

[01:08:48] He is still within range with his bolter.

[01:08:51] So he is firing another bolt at you guys.

[01:08:57] I should get to go.

[01:08:59] No, you don't, because I rolled net 20.

[01:09:01] Why did he go?

[01:09:02] Oh, never mind.

[01:09:03] Surprise, Ron.

[01:09:04] Yeah, surprise.

[01:09:05] Yeah.

[01:09:08] Sorry.

[01:09:09] No, you're not.

[01:09:10] No, you're not.

[01:09:14] So, yeah.

[01:09:16] He is going to lob a attack on.

[01:09:24] So, Copper, you see a bolt go flying overhead, about 50 feet overhead.

[01:09:37] That's pretty bad.

[01:09:40] They're attempting to employ indirect fire.

[01:09:43] It's very indirect.

[01:09:45] Yes.

[01:09:47] So, next up, Fintan.

[01:09:49] Actually, he's before me.

[01:09:51] Okay.

[01:09:51] Kirklus.

[01:09:52] Because we got the same result, but he has a higher dex.

[01:09:55] Yeah.

[01:09:55] So, I'm going to take another shot at that guy I unhorsed.

[01:09:59] Yep.

[01:09:59] Just because he pissed me off.

[01:10:01] Oh, the guy on the ground?

[01:10:02] Yeah.

[01:10:02] Well, that was the one that just fired you.

[01:10:04] Oh, he's on the ground.

[01:10:05] He shot us.

[01:10:05] Yeah, he was on the ground.

[01:10:06] He did a roll and then basically, like, fired a shot as soon as he could.

[01:10:09] Do I still have advantage?

[01:10:12] What and why?

[01:10:13] You shouldn't be able to see me yet, right?

[01:10:15] Fire on cover?

[01:10:17] Yeah.

[01:10:18] Is that how cover works in this?

[01:10:22] I don't think so.

[01:10:23] I think because you took the shot, you're exposed.

[01:10:25] Yeah.

[01:10:25] All right, fine.

[01:10:27] However, he is damaged now.

[01:10:29] So I got the extra d8 damage.

[01:10:31] Yeah.

[01:10:31] So that's 23 to hit?

[01:10:33] That will definitely hit.

[01:10:39] I'm going to keep willing.

[01:10:41] Out of four dice, there are three ones.

[01:10:46] That's 7...13 damage.

[01:10:48] Okay.

[01:10:49] He's not doing too good.

[01:10:50] Like, you took out a leg.

[01:10:53] Like, it's gone.

[01:10:56] And he just took a knee.

[01:10:58] You forced him to take a knee.

[01:11:00] But he is...

[01:11:01] We're going to still try and do something next time.

[01:11:06] Next up is now Fintan.

[01:11:08] Okay.

[01:11:09] I'm going to be sure you conjure a bow made of shadow and silver flame.

[01:11:16] Ooh.

[01:11:18] Is it like the bow is one component and, like...

[01:11:21] Is it like a shadow bow with a silver flame string?

[01:11:25] Sure.

[01:11:26] Okay.

[01:11:28] And the...

[01:11:29] Yeah.

[01:11:30] The bow is shadow and the arrow is silver flame.

[01:11:33] Oh, there you go.

[01:11:34] Nice.

[01:11:34] There we go.

[01:11:36] Uh...

[01:11:36] Ooh.

[01:11:37] Okay.

[01:11:38] Uh...

[01:11:38] 13 and 6.

[01:11:39] Does a 19 hit?

[01:11:40] Yep.

[01:11:40] Okay.

[01:11:44] Which dice is this?

[01:12:00] Nine piercing damage.

[01:12:02] Okay.

[01:12:03] How do you kill him?

[01:12:05] Um...

[01:12:08] With an arrow to the knee.

[01:12:10] So, the other knee?

[01:12:11] The other knee.

[01:12:12] Yeah.

[01:12:13] Ah!

[01:12:14] Ah!

[01:12:17] His one leg just...

[01:12:19] Like, your last arrow just, like, took out.

[01:12:22] It shattered.

[01:12:24] And he, like, took a knee.

[01:12:25] And then the other one was like...

[01:12:26] It's only a flesh wound.

[01:12:27] Yeah.

[01:12:28] Well, he still, like, dropped as a real good.

[01:12:31] And then yours just, like, took him out.

[01:12:33] And he's like...

[01:12:33] Ah!

[01:12:36] Okay.

[01:12:37] Okay.

[01:12:38] And, uh...

[01:12:39] I get another shot.

[01:12:40] He gets another shot.

[01:12:42] Would you have technically got another shot?

[01:12:43] Sorry.

[01:12:43] No.

[01:12:44] Okay.

[01:12:47] I took the bonus sneak attack damage.

[01:12:49] Actually, I don't know if I actually get another shot.

[01:12:52] One second.

[01:12:53] I don't know if that only applies to melee attacks.

[01:12:57] I wouldn't.

[01:12:58] Because it's an invocation for, uh, the thing of blades.

[01:13:03] Oh.

[01:13:05] An arrowhead is technically a blade.

[01:13:08] Mm-hmm.

[01:13:09] Aaron.

[01:13:10] Ah!

[01:13:10] You can attack with your...

[01:13:12] Uh, you can attack with your packed weapon twice.

[01:13:15] Instead of once.

[01:13:16] And this is a packed weapon.

[01:13:19] Thanks.

[01:13:19] There you go.

[01:13:20] Very nice.

[01:13:21] Is your, um...

[01:13:22] Are you using your, uh...

[01:13:23] Your side...

[01:13:24] That side of the coach?

[01:13:26] I will allow your dog up here if she wants to get up here.

[01:13:30] Absolutely.

[01:13:31] Lucy.

[01:13:32] No.

[01:13:33] No.

[01:13:34] Lucy, come on.

[01:13:35] Lucy.

[01:13:35] Come on.

[01:13:35] Go.

[01:13:36] Go.

[01:13:37] Come on.

[01:13:38] Come on.

[01:13:40] Move.

[01:13:41] Move, bitch.

[01:13:42] Get out the way.

[01:13:43] Get your fat ass over there.

[01:13:45] Aw.

[01:13:46] Come on.

[01:13:48] Come on, Lucy.

[01:13:50] You got some explaining to do with.

[01:13:51] Go see.

[01:14:01] Okay.

[01:14:02] So...

[01:14:03] Sorry, did you get another shot?

[01:14:04] I can't remember.

[01:14:05] You didn't.

[01:14:06] Go get it.

[01:14:07] Yes, I do.

[01:14:08] Okay.

[01:14:08] Uh, so that's a...

[01:14:10] Uh, 19 and 6.

[01:14:12] 25 to hit.

[01:14:13] That will hit the next one.

[01:14:14] Okay.

[01:14:19] Okay.

[01:14:19] That's, uh...

[01:14:20] 6 plus 3 is 9 plus 1 is 10.

[01:14:25] 10.

[01:14:26] 10?

[01:14:27] Okay.

[01:14:28] 10 damage.

[01:14:29] Give me a second.

[01:14:33] He stays on his horse, but he takes the shot.

[01:14:36] Get up here.

[01:14:38] Okay.

[01:14:39] Well, that's the best I can do.

[01:14:40] Mm-hmm.

[01:14:42] Um, okay.

[01:14:42] So next up is copper.

[01:14:45] Actually, it wasn't the best I can do.

[01:14:48] You did good.

[01:14:49] Don't worry.

[01:14:50] How many are there?

[01:14:51] There are two more.

[01:14:52] Or there are two left on their horses.

[01:14:53] Okay.

[01:14:54] Range.

[01:14:55] Um, at this point they're about 70 feet, uh, from the carts.

[01:15:00] Okay.

[01:15:04] Um...

[01:15:05] Okay.

[01:15:06] I don't have that prepared.

[01:15:08] That would've been nice.

[01:15:14] Okay.

[01:15:15] I mean, I'll just...

[01:15:16] I'll follow suit and just, um...

[01:15:20] I'll take a couple thought shots at...

[01:15:21] Which one was hit last?

[01:15:23] The one that, um...

[01:15:25] Uh, Finn just shot?

[01:15:26] Mm-hmm.

[01:15:27] Okay.

[01:15:27] Basically the one in front.

[01:15:28] Mm-hmm.

[01:15:37] Are you tempting my dog to jump up onto the head to the chip?

[01:15:39] Yes.

[01:15:42] I mean, it might work.

[01:15:44] Kind of.

[01:15:49] Okay.

[01:15:50] He's like...

[01:15:50] No one.

[01:15:51] Get up here.

[01:15:52] Actually, the smarter thing for me to do would be to try to, uh, hit one of them with Ray

[01:15:57] of Frost, because that'll slow him down and make it easier for us to potentially overrun

[01:16:00] them.

[01:16:01] Get up here.

[01:16:02] Uh...

[01:16:02] Nope.

[01:16:03] All right.

[01:16:03] So I'll hit the...

[01:16:07] She does want to open the catch.

[01:16:10] She doesn't seem to.

[01:16:12] That's fine.

[01:16:13] If she does, I will help her up.

[01:16:15] I like...

[01:16:15] I like having a dog sitting with me, but she doesn't seem to want to.

[01:16:20] Might also because you're in the actual...

[01:16:21] The Sputcher usually sits.

[01:16:24] She sits on that side.

[01:16:26] That's when I'm here.

[01:16:28] All right.

[01:16:29] Either way.

[01:16:29] Ray of Frost.

[01:16:30] Yep.

[01:16:30] The one that was hit last.

[01:16:32] Even if he survives, he'll be a little slower.

[01:16:35] Or it's horse-willing.

[01:16:37] Yeah.

[01:16:39] That's not very good.

[01:16:40] That was not very good.

[01:16:40] Nope.

[01:16:41] It's a total of eight.

[01:16:42] That is not enough.

[01:16:44] So we're gonna miss.

[01:16:45] Yep.

[01:16:48] And...

[01:16:49] Rob can't really do anything, actually.

[01:16:51] Unless you want him to...

[01:16:53] Jump off and go get him.

[01:16:55] Go get him.

[01:16:55] Sick of boy.

[01:16:57] Nah.

[01:16:58] Okay.

[01:16:59] So it's up to the...

[01:17:00] Now it's on the Warforges.

[01:17:01] So they are gonna fire their bolts at you guys.

[01:17:07] So...

[01:17:11] Kirklus.

[01:17:11] You are getting shot.

[01:17:13] What?

[01:17:14] Does a...

[01:17:15] Hang on.

[01:17:16] I said you're...

[01:17:17] They're all their attempt.

[01:17:18] She didn't.

[01:17:21] Does a...

[01:17:22] 24 hit you?

[01:17:24] Yes.

[01:17:25] Okay.

[01:17:26] Now, I should be in cover, shall I not?

[01:17:28] In the cart?

[01:17:30] Yes.

[01:17:31] Yeah, you should have partial cover.

[01:17:33] So then they get a...

[01:17:34] Minus of five?

[01:17:36] A disadvantage?

[01:17:41] Yes.

[01:17:42] Let's double check and see how cover works in this game.

[01:17:45] Check your...

[01:17:46] It doesn't say...

[01:17:47] Really?

[01:17:47] It doesn't show me cover.

[01:17:48] Hang on.

[01:17:49] I thought you read cover off of that one.

[01:17:50] It does show me cover.

[01:17:52] Half cover.

[01:17:54] Plus two bonus to AC and dexterity save throws against attacks and effects of original buckets.

[01:18:02] Okay.

[01:18:03] Oh, to AC.

[01:18:04] Okay.

[01:18:04] So...

[01:18:04] So do you...

[01:18:06] Does he have half cover or three quarters cover?

[01:18:10] Um...

[01:18:12] I would say half cover, probably.

[01:18:14] Because you were just out, like, firing a couple of arrows.

[01:18:16] Fair.

[01:18:17] So...

[01:18:17] So you get a plus two to your AC.

[01:18:19] Okay, and I still get hit.

[01:18:21] Okay, so you still get hit.

[01:18:21] Okay.

[01:18:23] That was a pretty good roll.

[01:18:24] Yeah.

[01:18:24] I did roll a 19.

[01:18:27] Uh...

[01:18:27] Okay, so...

[01:18:28] 3d6 of damage.

[01:18:30] Because they're bolts.

[01:18:31] They're heavy dudes.

[01:18:31] They're the bolts that he has.

[01:18:33] Goddamn it.

[01:18:36] Oh.

[01:18:39] Um...

[01:18:40] 12 damage.

[01:18:41] Ow.

[01:18:42] That's a giant, fuck you, metal spike.

[01:18:45] Like, just comes lobbing at you.

[01:18:52] Yeah.

[01:18:53] You especially hate us because we're fleshy.

[01:18:55] Yeah.

[01:18:57] And I did just kill their buddy.

[01:18:59] Mm-hmm.

[01:19:00] And they do hate, uh...

[01:19:02] Uh...

[01:19:02] Copper because he's a...

[01:19:03] He's a...

[01:19:04] He's a fleshy sympathizer.

[01:19:05] Yeah.

[01:19:08] Good choice of pencil.

[01:19:14] It was...

[01:19:14] What's that, an $800 pencil?

[01:19:16] I guess, technically.

[01:19:18] What?

[01:19:18] It's like $120 a week, pencil.

[01:19:24] Union.

[01:19:25] Jesus.

[01:19:27] Let you know.

[01:19:28] 183.

[01:19:29] Nice.

[01:19:31] Okay.

[01:19:32] So that...

[01:19:32] Yeah, you take that damage.

[01:19:33] Um...

[01:19:34] Did they get another shot?

[01:19:36] They do not get another shot with range.

[01:19:39] They get multi-shots on melee.

[01:19:42] Um...

[01:19:43] So the next one...

[01:19:43] But the next one's going up.

[01:19:45] Don't let them get into melee.

[01:19:46] Yeah.

[01:19:48] And...

[01:19:51] Donkey is getting hit.

[01:19:53] What?

[01:19:54] Because I have a D4 that I've been rolling on who's getting hit.

[01:19:58] 1, 2, 3, and 4 is Donkey.

[01:20:03] Well, that sucks.

[01:20:04] Donkey has stats.

[01:20:06] He can be killed.

[01:20:07] Can he be hit with...

[01:20:08] Will he get hit with 19?

[01:20:11] Yes.

[01:20:12] His AC is terrible.

[01:20:15] Okay, well, I might...

[01:20:16] You know, I might...

[01:20:18] They wrote poorly on my dice.

[01:20:20] I was planning on making barding for him, but then we never used it.

[01:20:26] Why did we bring him?

[01:20:28] He was...

[01:20:29] Okay, guys.

[01:20:29] Like, from my perspective, like...

[01:20:31] You have this Donkey...

[01:20:33] In the back.

[01:20:34] In the back cart.

[01:20:35] Yeah.

[01:20:35] He's the first one that they should technically be focusing on.

[01:20:38] Or at least, like, attack...

[01:20:39] Yeah, he's the biggest threat.

[01:20:40] Yeah.

[01:20:41] He's not the biggest threat, but he's...

[01:20:42] I know, I know.

[01:20:42] He's, like, right there.

[01:20:43] So, like, they're...

[01:20:44] He's the biggest threat.

[01:20:46] Largest.

[01:20:47] That's true, yeah.

[01:20:48] He doesn't have any attacks.

[01:20:50] He's not a threat.

[01:20:52] They're still gonna hit him because, like, that...

[01:20:53] Like, it's the...

[01:20:54] That had to be some, like, threat outside of you guys.

[01:20:57] Yeah.

[01:20:58] Okay.

[01:21:01] Um...

[01:21:01] 9 damage.

[01:21:04] Did I just kill your donkey?

[01:21:06] No, he's a Mage Red Donkey.

[01:21:07] Cool.

[01:21:07] I was worried.

[01:21:08] He has 10 hit points.

[01:21:10] He's down to what?

[01:21:12] Yeah.

[01:21:12] I actually have 26.

[01:21:14] Yeah.

[01:21:16] Like, don't get me wrong.

[01:21:17] There are some hits that I've taken in this game that he would not have survived.

[01:21:20] But this is now one of them.

[01:21:22] Mm-hmm.

[01:21:23] How many damage?

[01:21:24] Nine.

[01:21:27] Probably not doing...

[01:21:28] Probably not reacting to that well as the giant, like, metal spike just hit him.

[01:21:32] Well, now they've just made him an ornery donkey, so he gets an attack.

[01:21:36] They get close enough.

[01:21:38] Pfft!

[01:21:40] Donkey kick.

[01:21:41] Wait, does that mean that Spike went right up his ass?

[01:21:45] Well, Spike went into him, so it went right in his ass.

[01:21:49] Or your ass.

[01:21:50] Right in my ass.

[01:21:52] Okay, so top of the round.

[01:21:53] They are now 80 feet away.

[01:21:56] Kirklus.

[01:21:57] Oh, they're still well in range.

[01:21:59] Yep.

[01:22:00] Oh, yeah.

[01:22:03] Which one just shot me?

[01:22:05] The one that just shot you would have been the one that's, like, up front.

[01:22:11] The one that you attacked.

[01:22:12] Okay.

[01:22:13] Fuck that guy.

[01:22:14] That's a crit.

[01:22:16] Okay.

[01:22:17] How's crit work in this game?

[01:22:19] Double damage.

[01:22:21] Oh, there's no roll to confirm or anything?

[01:22:22] Just double damage?

[01:22:23] No.

[01:22:23] It's just...

[01:22:23] I have.

[01:22:28] 12 plus 5, 17 times 2, 32.

[01:22:32] Okay.

[01:22:33] He is dead.

[01:22:34] Just...

[01:22:34] Just dead.

[01:22:36] Yeah.

[01:22:36] Like, do you want to narrate how he dies?

[01:22:38] Or can I?

[01:22:39] I just crank it right back, take an aimed shot, and put it right through his face.

[01:22:43] And that face is...

[01:22:45] Keeps going.

[01:22:46] Yeah.

[01:22:47] Like, back the other way.

[01:22:48] River.

[01:22:49] Like, the body's still there.

[01:22:50] It's just like...

[01:22:52] And then falls off the horse.

[01:22:54] And the steed, not...

[01:22:55] Being an iron steed tied to that oar board, kind of just goes off to the...

[01:23:00] Like, goes off.

[01:23:01] And since we go at the same time, I'll use my...

[01:23:06] My, uh...

[01:23:08] Uh...

[01:23:09] Movement.

[01:23:10] To, uh...

[01:23:11] Talk to Kirkland.

[01:23:12] To be like, so how are you making the shots like this?

[01:23:14] Could you give me some pointers?

[01:23:15] I really just...

[01:23:16] Is there something wrong with my form?

[01:23:17] Because I'm not getting nearly the level of accuracy you are.

[01:23:21] You must ensure that the backhand comes to the same point on every draw.

[01:23:26] Okay, let's give that a shot.

[01:23:27] No.

[01:23:28] Can I, uh...

[01:23:29] Can I have advantage since we're discussing archery?

[01:23:33] Tell you what.

[01:23:35] You...

[01:23:35] Roll charisma.

[01:23:37] The charisma save.

[01:23:39] To inspire.

[01:23:41] Six.

[01:23:42] Nope.

[01:23:43] No.

[01:23:44] Okay.

[01:23:45] I mean...

[01:23:48] It was a good idea, but like...

[01:23:51] Bonus action, hex on one.

[01:23:53] Okay.

[01:23:56] Well, the one.

[01:24:02] Uh, okay.

[01:24:03] So 16 and 6 is 22.

[01:24:06] 22?

[01:24:07] That'll hit.

[01:24:08] Okay.

[01:24:11] Ugh.

[01:24:13] I rolled a 1.

[01:24:16] Uh, plus...

[01:24:17] Uh, 3 is 4, plus 1 is 5.

[01:24:21] So 5 plus...

[01:24:24] 5.

[01:24:26] So that's, uh...

[01:24:28] 10 damage.

[01:24:29] Okay.

[01:24:30] Uh, he is still...

[01:24:32] Actually, I'll roll to see if he falls.

[01:24:34] 10 damage.

[01:24:35] He does not fall.

[01:24:38] Uh, but he is hurt.

[01:24:40] Okay.

[01:24:40] But I get another shot.

[01:24:42] Yes, he does.

[01:24:43] He does.

[01:24:51] 18 and 6 is enough.

[01:24:59] 5 and 3 is 8.

[01:25:01] Plus 1 is 9.

[01:25:05] 10, 11.

[01:25:06] So I will, uh, hit him with a silvery arrow for another 11.

[01:25:10] Okay.

[01:25:12] He's still up, but he is very badly hurt.

[01:25:17] Quantity is no substitute for quality.

[01:25:21] You're not wrong.

[01:25:23] Uh, Copper, you're up.

[01:25:25] But I don't get sneak attack damage.

[01:25:28] No.

[01:25:29] Um...

[01:25:29] I didn't have that last time.

[01:25:31] Okay, so, uh, there's one up now.

[01:25:33] And the left.

[01:25:34] And he's been hit.

[01:25:36] You've been hit a couple times.

[01:25:37] I mean, really?

[01:25:38] I think 2 die 8 as well.

[01:25:39] Branch?

[01:25:40] 8, 80.

[01:25:42] Oh, okay.

[01:25:42] He's getting a little bit away.

[01:25:43] Yeah, you guys are just, like, beating feet away from them.

[01:25:48] Okay.

[01:25:49] Anyway, the brakes.

[01:25:51] No, we can let him go.

[01:25:52] Don't get...

[01:25:56] He flies over us.

[01:26:05] I can feel it like...

[01:26:06] I can feel it like...

[01:26:07] I can feel it like...

[01:26:08] I can feel it like...

[01:26:08] About the best out.

[01:26:08] Yeah.

[01:26:08] From, like, the way I was laughing.

[01:26:10] I can feel it.

[01:26:11] Oh.

[01:26:14] Oh.

[01:26:15] Okay.

[01:26:16] So, yeah.

[01:26:17] Um, I didn't like that I was getting hit last time.

[01:26:18] So, I'm just going to magic missile him.

[01:26:20] Just be done with it.

[01:26:22] Okay.

[01:26:22] I'm going to make sure I hit.

[01:26:24] Um...

[01:26:25] All three darts?

[01:26:26] Yeah, all three darts.

[01:26:27] One guy.

[01:26:28] That is...

[01:26:29] These guys?

[01:26:31] One guy?

[01:26:33] My hex lasts 8 hours.

[01:26:36] That sucks.

[01:26:37] That's a addictive hex.

[01:26:39] Yeah, really.

[01:26:40] Assuming the guy survives that long.

[01:26:43] There's no way.

[01:26:49] I haven't been doing that.

[01:26:51] Apparently I can give him disadvantage on any one of his ability checks.

[01:26:55] Very nice.

[01:26:56] So, that's a total of 13 damage.

[01:26:59] As I take Kirk's advice and do the pantomime doing a bow thing, putting my hand to my cheek

[01:27:06] as my thumb, my forefinger, and my middle finger light up with magical energy, then as

[01:27:13] I, like, draw back, like, that gif I put in Discord, I draw back magical energy and fire

[01:27:20] at the three bolts as they go, like, enemy missiles and hit him.

[01:27:23] Yeah.

[01:27:23] And he just explodes.

[01:27:25] Oh, he died?

[01:27:25] Yeah.

[01:27:25] Oh, cool.

[01:27:26] I didn't expect to kill him.

[01:27:28] Yeah.

[01:27:29] He just, him and the horse just explode.

[01:27:31] Oh, the horse didn't do anything.

[01:27:32] It was an iron steam.

[01:27:34] But, I mean, for you, that might also be the one.

[01:27:35] Yeah, exactly.

[01:27:36] The horse didn't do anything.

[01:27:37] Technique, sir.

[01:27:38] Thank you.

[01:27:38] I learned from the best of us.

[01:27:43] Intentious.

[01:27:45] You did just start the...

[01:27:47] I have always had a bow, sir.

[01:27:49] You have not always had that bow, sir.

[01:27:50] No, this is a new bow.

[01:27:52] Yeah.

[01:27:53] That's the problem.

[01:27:54] It's a new bow.

[01:27:55] Yeah.

[01:27:56] Sure.

[01:27:57] Yeah.

[01:27:58] Do you guys want to stop to loot, or do you just keep going?

[01:28:01] Yes.

[01:28:02] Prophets.

[01:28:04] Loop around.

[01:28:05] Loot around.

[01:28:07] All right.

[01:28:11] Also, are any of their horses still alive?

[01:28:13] Well, one of them is definitely not.

[01:28:16] I didn't talk about the horse.

[01:28:18] The other two you could technically wrangle.

[01:28:20] They've kind of veered off and kind of going out into the waste.

[01:28:23] So you could try and wrangle them.

[01:28:24] Thorn whip.

[01:28:26] That's your answer to everything, Dave.

[01:28:28] Kind of is.

[01:28:29] What's the range on that?

[01:28:31] 30?

[01:28:32] Okay.

[01:28:33] It's not super far.

[01:28:34] If you want to roll your thorn, let me try and catch one.

[01:28:40] Does anybody else want to try and catch the other one?

[01:28:42] Yes.

[01:28:42] I'm going to misty step onto its back.

[01:28:45] Okay.

[01:28:46] Ooh.

[01:28:47] Nice.

[01:28:48] Okay.

[01:28:51] You're misty stepping in the Mournlands.

[01:28:55] Uh-huh.

[01:28:56] Okay.

[01:28:57] Are you going to penalize one of those?

[01:28:59] No, no, no.

[01:28:59] I'm just going to say, as you do it, and as you kind of, during that transition from where

[01:29:04] you were to where you are, you definitely hear the sounds of bat wings fluttering overhead

[01:29:12] like a horde of them, and a strange, deep cackling laugh.

[01:29:19] But then you are back in the Mournlands and on the horse.

[01:29:28] Okay.

[01:29:30] That's never happened before.

[01:29:31] Uncertainly.

[01:29:32] Yeah.

[01:29:32] Uh-huh.

[01:29:33] Were there skulls in the mist?

[01:29:35] No.

[01:29:36] In fact, actually, when you guys saw him, like, the mist literally poofed where he was.

[01:29:41] And the shapes that they formed were actually basically bats made of fog and mist.

[01:29:48] That's pretty cool.

[01:29:49] Does that usually happen?

[01:29:51] Not quite like that.

[01:29:53] Not a lot could be explained about the Mournlands.

[01:29:55] Yeah.

[01:29:57] Um.

[01:29:57] I really hate this place.

[01:30:00] Yeah, you're still itchy.

[01:30:01] Like, the madman.

[01:30:02] Don't we usually hate our neighbors?

[01:30:04] Yes.

[01:30:06] Stupid sexy Flanders.

[01:30:09] Okay, so roll a handle animal.

[01:30:12] Or whatever that is in this game.

[01:30:14] Animal handling.

[01:30:15] That is actually a thing.

[01:30:16] Shit.

[01:30:16] Is it?

[01:30:17] Yeah.

[01:30:17] It's a wisdom check.

[01:30:21] Fuck.

[01:30:22] Now, it's not an animal.

[01:30:24] It's technically, it's a construct, but it is a construct that is acting like an animal.

[01:30:27] All right, fine.

[01:30:28] It's the same way that I'm a person.

[01:30:30] Yeah.

[01:30:31] You're not a person.

[01:30:33] Oof.

[01:30:33] So can you start a whip on him?

[01:30:36] You could last soon be a friend.

[01:30:39] 17?

[01:30:41] 17.

[01:30:42] Okay, 17 is enough.

[01:30:43] Okay.

[01:30:44] You manage to grab the reins, or the chains, and pull it back from going too far into what

[01:30:51] looks like a bramble of spikes and fire.

[01:30:55] Okay.

[01:30:57] And I'll ride him back towards the cart.

[01:31:00] Okay.

[01:31:00] Very nice.

[01:31:02] And then, what are you doing with the, you're using your thorn whip on the other one?

[01:31:07] Yes.

[01:31:09] I'm grabbing onto my root beard, and normally it goes like pointy for the thorn whips, but

[01:31:16] I kind of like shave off the thorns, try to have it just be a whip, then snap it off

[01:31:22] and crack it as a whip comes out.

[01:31:24] I tell Rob to go herd him towards me a little bit.

[01:31:27] Okay.

[01:31:28] And then I roll a 25.

[01:31:31] Okay.

[01:31:31] Yeah.

[01:31:31] Cool.

[01:31:32] You managed to like lasso its neck and managed to like grab it down.

[01:31:37] No other problems.

[01:31:38] Okay, cool.

[01:31:38] So I grabbed him.

[01:31:39] Do you want to jump on him and hurt him?

[01:31:41] Do you want to handle him?

[01:31:42] I don't want to touch that thing.

[01:31:44] Oh, it's magical.

[01:31:45] No, it's a construct.

[01:31:47] He hates constructs.

[01:31:48] Fuck that shit.

[01:31:49] I don't want to touch a neck creature.

[01:31:51] Why not?

[01:31:51] Constructs and I'm dead.

[01:31:54] You gotta learn at some point.

[01:31:55] No.

[01:31:56] Fine.

[01:31:57] I have a real horse, not that monstrosity.

[01:32:01] Do you have a sword that turns into a horse?

[01:32:03] What?

[01:32:04] Didn't you get like a scimitar that had like a horse like spirit bound to it or something?

[01:32:07] Yeah, I didn't wind up using that because I'm not proficient with it.

[01:32:10] That's fair.

[01:32:12] That's on the wall.

[01:32:14] Yeah.

[01:32:14] And I'm on my abby's.

[01:32:15] On the loop wall, yeah.

[01:32:17] What was the deal with that?

[01:32:19] I can tell you what it was.

[01:32:22] You had 14 handling?

[01:32:24] Yeah.

[01:32:25] It wasn't that much better.

[01:32:26] I needed proficient with it.

[01:32:27] Yeah.

[01:32:27] Talain Karah.

[01:32:28] The bold stallion.

[01:32:30] It is a magical double scimitar with an intelligence to it.

[01:32:39] The beautiful weapon holds the essence of a proud Valinar warhorse, a lifelong companion

[01:32:45] of a ranger, Valet Idalia.

[01:32:49] When her faithful steed finally fell in battle, Vela forged this blade so her companion could

[01:32:56] continue to ride with her into battle.

[01:32:59] Oh.

[01:33:01] Oh.

[01:33:03] This is a Valinar sword.

[01:33:07] Yeah.

[01:33:08] There are neighbors to the south.

[01:33:10] We're actually on fairly friendly terms with them.

[01:33:12] We could sell it to them.

[01:33:14] For probably a buttload of money.

[01:33:16] You could also see if the Idalia house or the clan is still around.

[01:33:23] They would probably want their shit out of that.

[01:33:25] If they both want it.

[01:33:27] We could get multiple shit out of this.

[01:33:29] Yeah, exactly.

[01:33:30] Because I'm pretty sure if you found her sword in a pile of corpses, I'm pretty sure Valia

[01:33:37] is probably in that pile of corpses as well.

[01:33:40] Or maybe she was disarmed.

[01:33:42] We should have looked for her.

[01:33:44] Well, we're not really that good with elven history, are you?

[01:33:49] No.

[01:33:50] I mean, you should, since you are a Valinar elf.

[01:33:53] I left to join a mercy company young.

[01:33:56] Yeah, that's true.

[01:33:56] I did not give a shit.

[01:33:58] Yeah.

[01:33:58] You were from Arenal?

[01:33:59] Yeah.

[01:34:00] The health land.

[01:34:01] You were born there and you left.

[01:34:03] I mean saying that he had no fucks left to give.

[01:34:06] Yeah.

[01:34:06] Okay, so yeah, you come back around, you wrangle the two mechanical horses that were still around.

[01:34:13] You find the head of the other horse in the crater that you left with your arcade missiles.

[01:34:23] Yep.

[01:34:25] And you guys find 40 gold between them.

[01:34:31] Or like from like just like in pouches or like just like scattered around where they were.

[01:34:37] Very neat pile directly between them.

[01:34:41] We just turn them upside down and start shaking your pockets.

[01:34:44] Isn't it really that odd though in the Mournalands for that to happen?

[01:34:46] I mean.

[01:34:47] Symmetrical coin stacking.

[01:34:49] After like as soon as you kill somebody, suddenly their coins just manifest and like stack.

[01:34:55] Unexplicably.

[01:34:56] I mean they have living spells, so.

[01:34:58] Yeah.

[01:34:58] No?

[01:34:59] Literally ordered by date?

[01:35:00] Oh man.

[01:35:02] That's even, I think that's scarier.

[01:35:04] For some reason.

[01:35:07] Man, you found 40 gold.

[01:35:09] You can lop off some limbs.

[01:35:12] They've got those.

[01:35:12] Are there any Everonis?

[01:35:14] There's no Everonis.

[01:35:18] But you take the whole corpses.

[01:35:20] Yeah, you can also just take the corpses and like.

[01:35:22] Oh yeah, we've got some Warforged that might need the spare parts.

[01:35:25] These ones also, they are, again they're decked out in like, they've augmented themselves.

[01:35:29] So they have like the standard kind of retractable blades like Warforged have.

[01:35:34] But it looks like their javelins and stuff are actually like those giant iron spike bolts.

[01:35:42] Yeah.

[01:35:42] And they have one of, they have a couple of them have their arms have been augmented with

[01:35:47] the bolt launcher that you have on your back.

[01:35:49] Yeah, I also need to do like some research on these to see if I can potentially augment my own to fix it and stuff.

[01:35:59] Make it more reliable.

[01:36:00] And also make more bolts because I have two.

[01:36:03] Well, you now have.

[01:36:04] That's right there.

[01:36:04] Yeah.

[01:36:05] You now have.

[01:36:06] 75.

[01:36:07] Nine.

[01:36:08] Ooh.

[01:36:09] You have nine bolts from the ones that are on the ground.

[01:36:14] And the one that we pull out of my donkey.

[01:36:16] Yeah.

[01:36:17] And then you can, I don't even make you roll, you can just like heal your donkey.

[01:36:21] Shit.

[01:36:21] I'm going to pull right out of your ass.

[01:36:23] Yep.

[01:36:24] Yep.

[01:36:26] Handle the animal.

[01:36:27] You fail.

[01:36:28] Poof.

[01:36:29] I just kicked right out.

[01:36:30] That's a ranged weapon that you had that you could have used in this fight.

[01:36:34] It was.

[01:36:35] Yeah, but.

[01:36:36] You only had two shots.

[01:36:37] I only had two shots.

[01:36:38] Now you have not.

[01:36:39] If you don't use it, you're never going to use it.

[01:36:43] Yeah.

[01:36:43] You will never remember.

[01:36:44] It'll be like your dog.

[01:36:47] You will forget that it's there and not remember to use it when you need it.

[01:36:50] If you are not in the habit of using it when you don't need it.

[01:36:54] I mean, fair.

[01:36:55] Also, part of the problem is I have too many weapons as it is because the first thing I

[01:36:59] was going to do was use my hand cross.

[01:37:00] You have too many weapons.

[01:37:01] You have unlimited weapons.

[01:37:03] I know.

[01:37:03] You have an anime weapon.

[01:37:05] It's basically like, it's like a quirk from fucking My Hero Academia.

[01:37:10] Yeah.

[01:37:12] Okay.

[01:37:13] There was actually, somebody did a LAU, basically like an American version of My Hero Academia,

[01:37:19] like a live action.

[01:37:20] And one of the person's quirks was they could like chain, they could manifest whatever weapon

[01:37:24] they want from the weapon they were currently using.

[01:37:26] So they'd like do a twirl with a katana.

[01:37:29] It changes to nunchucks.

[01:37:30] And then in another transition, they swing that one.

[01:37:34] Suddenly it's a bow staff.

[01:37:34] Sorry.

[01:37:35] Very brief aside.

[01:37:37] Has anybody in this room seen John Wick 4 yet?

[01:37:40] No.

[01:37:41] Oh my God, he uses nunchucks.

[01:37:44] Really?

[01:37:44] Yes.

[01:37:45] And I think it's the only time I've actually seen a realistic usage of nunchucks.

[01:37:52] I'm sorry.

[01:37:54] Michelangelo?

[01:37:56] Only realistic usage of nunchucks I've ever seen anywhere.

[01:38:01] Really?

[01:38:02] That is pretty cool.

[01:38:02] It was real cool to watch.

[01:38:06] Nice.

[01:38:07] I'll put you on the list.

[01:38:09] Also it's John Wick 4.

[01:38:11] I was going to see it anyway.

[01:38:14] New Dungeons and Dragons movies.

[01:38:16] I've heard that's really good.

[01:38:17] It's actually a lot of people are enjoying it.

[01:38:20] I might have to go see that tomorrow or something.

[01:38:22] I want to go see it.

[01:38:23] I would actually go see it with you tomorrow, but I'm going up to Bracebridge.

[01:38:27] From the end of the day.

[01:38:30] Anybody want to go see Cocaine Bear?

[01:38:32] I do kind of want to see Cocaine Bear.

[01:38:34] It does look ridiculous.

[01:38:36] I have no desire to go see Cocaine Bear.

[01:38:39] I don't want to see it in theaters, but I definitely will watch it.

[01:38:42] Yeah.

[01:38:42] We could have a Cocaine Bear night here.

[01:38:45] Yeah.

[01:38:47] We can do a Cocaine binge.

[01:38:49] Yeah.

[01:38:49] We can binge Cocaine Bear.

[01:38:52] We can binge Cocaine Bear.

[01:38:55] Yeah.

[01:38:56] Anyway.

[01:38:58] So, yeah.

[01:38:59] That's about all you find.

[01:39:00] You're loading up the corpses onto one of the wagons.

[01:39:06] Profits start here.

[01:39:08] Before we even get there.

[01:39:10] Well, and now we have two more horses that can carry stuff.

[01:39:13] Yep.

[01:39:14] Yep.

[01:39:14] And then, yeah, you guys hop back into your carts, or into your wagon, and start it up again.

[01:39:21] And press on.

[01:39:23] And now, hold on.

[01:39:24] When we examine the Warforged, did they have any kind of insignias or markings?

[01:39:27] Oh, yeah.

[01:39:28] Were they Lords of Blades?

[01:39:29] Oh, yeah.

[01:39:29] You didn't...

[01:39:30] They have an insignia, but it's really kind of not necessary, because they look like Lords

[01:39:34] of Blades raiders.

[01:39:35] Oh, okay.

[01:39:36] Because they're like...

[01:39:36] They have blades.

[01:39:37] They just have jagged blades, like, welded to their bodies.

[01:39:41] So, yeah.

[01:39:41] There's no disputing whose guys they...

[01:39:44] They were the Lord of Blades.

[01:39:45] Okay.

[01:39:45] Yeah.

[01:39:46] Yeah.

[01:39:46] They were being chopped their heads off and leave them on spikes.

[01:39:50] I mean, I'm always down for heads on spikes.

[01:39:54] Especially with Constance.

[01:39:55] I mean, it just looks like helmets on spikes.

[01:39:56] Yeah.

[01:39:57] How dare you?

[01:39:58] Maybe that was the Stormtrooper helmets in Mandalorian.

[01:40:01] Yeah.

[01:40:02] Mm-hmm.

[01:40:04] And the Ewoks to death.

[01:40:06] Well, the Ewoks turned them into drums.

[01:40:09] Yes.

[01:40:10] Yeah.

[01:40:10] Which is even better.

[01:40:11] It kind of is.

[01:40:15] All right.

[01:40:15] But heads on spikes it is.

[01:40:16] Mm-hmm.

[01:40:17] Okay.

[01:40:17] All right.

[01:40:18] Yeah.

[01:40:18] As you...

[01:40:19] The scene is, like, you guys, like, leaving in the distance.

[01:40:22] And, like, it just, like, pans a little bit.

[01:40:23] And just sees, like, these, like, three heads.

[01:40:26] And a horse head.

[01:40:28] Yeah.

[01:40:28] One horse head, too.

[01:40:30] The horse head is on top of the Cetra one.

[01:40:33] Mm-hmm.

[01:40:34] Okay.

[01:40:35] Cool.

[01:40:35] Because, you know, I had a couple of javelins and I never used them.

[01:40:38] So...

[01:40:46] Do you really want to attract...

[01:40:48] Like, you guys already had a...

[01:40:49] He already hates us.

[01:40:51] The town already had a siege.

[01:40:53] All right.

[01:40:53] All right.

[01:40:53] I mean, you guys are a little bit better prepared for a siege.

[01:40:56] But do you really want to incite more aggression again?

[01:41:00] Do you want me to, like, throw a war at you guys?

[01:41:02] No.

[01:41:04] They put one of ours in the hospital.

[01:41:06] We've got to put three of theirs in the morgue.

[01:41:07] This is how this works.

[01:41:09] Wow.

[01:41:09] Okay.

[01:41:11] It's untouchables rules.

[01:41:12] All right.

[01:41:13] They struggle.

[01:41:13] Do you want to play hardball?

[01:41:14] Oh, actually, they killed more than three when they attacked.

[01:41:17] They killed...

[01:41:17] Hang on.

[01:41:18] How many did they kill?

[01:41:19] A lot.

[01:41:20] Yeah.

[01:41:20] Your town has a city...

[01:41:22] It has a town cemetery now because of that.

[01:41:24] Yeah.

[01:41:25] Yeah, you lost one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine people.

[01:41:30] So we've caught up with three so far.

[01:41:32] We're going to do six more.

[01:41:33] At least.

[01:41:34] Yeah.

[01:41:36] Okay.

[01:41:37] All right.

[01:41:38] So you're leaving a calling card?

[01:41:40] No.

[01:41:41] No?

[01:41:42] We're just killing them and moving on.

[01:41:44] If you want to leave a calling card without me seeing it, that's fine.

[01:41:47] No, no, no.

[01:41:48] All right.

[01:41:49] I'll conjure my sword and...

[01:41:52] And big F.

[01:41:54] Yep.

[01:41:54] In the ground.

[01:41:55] Put up a...

[01:41:56] No, just put up a flag on the same javelin that we've got the heads mounted on.

[01:42:03] And then while it's flapping in the breeze, I'll do a stylized F into it.

[01:42:08] All right.

[01:42:08] Nice.

[01:42:09] Thus sparking your...

[01:42:11] More infamy for your character.

[01:42:12] Your legend.

[01:42:13] Yep.

[01:42:14] The mask of...

[01:42:15] The mask of Fintan.

[01:42:17] I really wish...

[01:42:18] I'll sheath my sword and then it'll just disappear.

[01:42:21] Yep.

[01:42:21] I really wish your last name started with U.

[01:42:24] F.

[01:42:25] F.

[01:42:25] F.

[01:42:28] F.

[01:42:29] You, the Lord of Blades.

[01:42:35] Sadly, no.

[01:42:37] My name is F.

[01:42:38] P.

[01:42:38] Is your middle name like Augustus or something?

[01:42:41] That's A.

[01:42:42] What would be a E one?

[01:42:43] Eugene.

[01:42:43] Eugene.

[01:42:44] Yeah.

[01:42:46] Uriel.

[01:42:48] That's a cool one.

[01:42:49] Usyllis.

[01:42:49] Yeah, Ulysses.

[01:42:51] Ulysses, yeah.

[01:42:51] That's the one that I was trying to say.

[01:42:54] Uther.

[01:42:55] Uther.

[01:42:56] Yes.

[01:42:57] Uther, yeah.

[01:42:58] Fintan Uther Blair.

[01:43:00] I mean, you're a paladin.

[01:43:01] So fup?

[01:43:03] Fup?

[01:43:05] You're gonna get fup-ed up.

[01:43:08] I think it has to be now, dude.

[01:43:11] All right.

[01:43:12] Yep.

[01:43:12] Middle name is Uther.

[01:43:15] Is it Uther or Ulther?

[01:43:17] Like Ulthar or Uther?

[01:43:18] U-T-H-E-R.

[01:43:20] Okay.

[01:43:21] I think Ulthar is Arthas' dad or something.

[01:43:26] Or somebody from World of Warcraft.

[01:43:28] Ah.

[01:43:28] That makes sense because they did do a lot of like parallel rip-off of Arthurian legend.

[01:43:37] All right.

[01:43:38] So, yeah.

[01:43:40] Basically, your trip from the FU to Tranish kind of goes on without a hitch.

[01:43:49] Um, again, desolate landscape.

[01:43:52] Um, there's a couple of...

[01:43:54] You pass a couple of like buildings that are broken up or destroyed or overgrown with some

[01:44:00] kind of weird like iron vines.

[01:44:03] Um, uh, there's a couple...

[01:44:05] There's...

[01:44:05] There's...

[01:44:06] It looks like there's a...

[01:44:06] There's a farming pass that has been burning for five years.

[01:44:11] Oh, really?

[01:44:11] There's just a fire...

[01:44:12] There's just...

[01:44:13] It's on fire and...

[01:44:14] Fire, man.

[01:44:15] You saw it in the background?

[01:44:16] You saw it...

[01:44:17] You saw it like...

[01:44:18] Oh, like...

[01:44:18] As soon as like it came on into range.

[01:44:21] Mm-hmm.

[01:44:21] And it just kept burning and it doesn't look like it's...

[01:44:23] It doesn't look like it's been like reduced or anything like that.

[01:44:26] Like it's...

[01:44:26] It's just a house on fire.

[01:44:28] Yeah.

[01:44:28] Like it looks like a perfectly normal house.

[01:44:30] But it's on fire and there's no scorching.

[01:44:33] So...

[01:44:34] If we could generate unlimited power...

[01:44:36] We just need to boil some water.

[01:44:38] Right?

[01:44:40] If you want to start set up a...

[01:44:42] Some kind of a defensible site in the mortal ones.

[01:44:49] Yeah?

[01:44:50] Unlimited power.

[01:44:52] Or we could just find out what's...

[01:44:54] Like how it's...

[01:44:55] If we could bottle it basically.

[01:44:57] And bring it home.

[01:44:57] If you want to try...

[01:44:58] You want to roll an arcade?

[01:45:00] One giant train.

[01:45:03] And put that in its engine.

[01:45:07] Yeah.

[01:45:07] Full house?

[01:45:08] Yep.

[01:45:09] Still on fire.

[01:45:12] That's a plan.

[01:45:13] I guess.

[01:45:15] Are you investigating anything like Veeber?

[01:45:17] No, no.

[01:45:18] Let's just keep going.

[01:45:19] Okay.

[01:45:21] Turn the whole house into ever-burning torches.

[01:45:23] I do see Copper just like looking.

[01:45:25] He's like...

[01:45:26] Hmm.

[01:45:26] Should we?

[01:45:27] Yeah.

[01:45:28] What's the range of my detect magic?

[01:45:30] I don't know.

[01:45:30] What is the range on this detect magic?

[01:45:32] 30 feet.

[01:45:33] Yeah.

[01:45:34] You can get within 30 feet.

[01:45:35] It's like...

[01:45:36] Hmm.

[01:45:37] I don't think it's one of my active spells.

[01:45:40] So what I'd have to do is a ritual.

[01:45:41] So we have to hang over here for 10 minutes.

[01:45:43] Yeah.

[01:45:44] So let's go.

[01:45:45] Instantly have a migraine.

[01:45:46] Because it's so...

[01:45:47] Hey, everything is brainer.

[01:45:49] Yeah.

[01:45:50] The white noise.

[01:45:51] Mm-hmm.

[01:45:52] The background radiation.

[01:45:55] It's just like when you go into like a bug zone in Shadowrun.

[01:45:59] Like as a mage.

[01:46:00] Just all like that chittering static in the air.

[01:46:02] All of the feedback.

[01:46:03] All of the feedback.

[01:46:05] Just smell burnt toast.

[01:46:07] Yeah.

[01:46:07] Basically.

[01:46:09] Okay.

[01:46:10] So you guys are ignoring them.

[01:46:11] Yeah, for now.

[01:46:11] Okay.

[01:46:12] So you get within the city limits of Tranish and it is eerily quiet and empty.

[01:46:23] There are no bodies on the ground.

[01:46:27] What was the population of the city before the fall?

[01:46:29] Tranish was a flourishing city.

[01:46:31] It had like at least 10,000 people.

[01:46:34] Oh, so it's quite a big city though.

[01:46:35] It was quite a big city.

[01:46:36] Yeah.

[01:46:37] Not all...

[01:46:38] Not nearly enough people fled in time.

[01:46:42] There should be bodies on the ground.

[01:46:44] It's also been five years.

[01:46:45] You guys have been through settlements before and you've found like bodies that don't decay.

[01:46:50] Yeah.

[01:46:50] There was no problem.

[01:46:51] There was a house that was just on fire.

[01:46:53] That's true.

[01:46:54] There was nobody to let the bodies hit the floor.

[01:46:59] Yeah.

[01:47:00] Let the bodies hit the floor.

[01:47:01] Let the bodies hit the floor.

[01:47:03] Yeah.

[01:47:04] I mean, for all we know...

[01:47:08] That's one of my favorite songs actually, to be honest.

[01:47:13] Yeah, magic is messed up.

[01:47:15] It could affect it.

[01:47:17] Depending on the radius from the ground zero, it could be influencing people differently.

[01:47:22] Like maybe all the people in Tronish actually just sort of vaporized.

[01:47:26] Where other ones later on fell down dead and other ones turned into chickens.

[01:47:30] Who knows?

[01:47:32] Or they're all undead and they're waiting underground for us somewhere.

[01:47:36] Don't spoil it.

[01:47:38] Wink.

[01:47:40] So you press on down this road.

[01:47:43] You know roughly where the bank is.

[01:47:45] It's not too far off.

[01:47:46] It's a couple of blocks away.

[01:47:52] We'll walk ahead of you and kind of see where the bank is.

[01:47:56] Amidst these empty, desolate buildings.

[01:47:59] No people whatsoever.

[01:48:01] Everybody want me a wisdom save.

[01:48:06] Did we get...

[01:48:07] How long did it take us to get to the town from the fight?

[01:48:10] From where?

[01:48:11] From the fight.

[01:48:12] From the fight?

[01:48:12] About four hours.

[01:48:14] Oh, okay.

[01:48:15] So that's enough time for a short rest.

[01:48:16] Yeah.

[01:48:17] Cool.

[01:48:17] Yeah, you guys could have just basically hopped...

[01:48:20] Somebody could have taken up the steering seat.

[01:48:25] What check is this?

[01:48:26] It's a wisdom.

[01:48:27] Twenty.

[01:48:28] Twenty-one?

[01:48:29] Twenty-one.

[01:48:30] Okay.

[01:48:31] Seven.

[01:48:32] Sib.

[01:48:34] Twelve.

[01:48:35] Okay.

[01:48:38] Everybody roll a dex save.

[01:48:45] That.

[01:48:49] Okay.

[01:48:50] As the cart bumps over something in the road.

[01:48:57] But you guys look down and didn't hit anything.

[01:49:02] Copy.

[01:49:03] Natural one.

[01:49:04] Natural one.

[01:49:05] Me too.

[01:49:06] Shit, yeah.

[01:49:07] I just saw that.

[01:49:08] So you guys go flying out of the cart.

[01:49:10] Yeah.

[01:49:10] You guys just like, what?

[01:49:14] You're fine.

[01:49:15] What did we roll?

[01:49:15] Sorry.

[01:49:16] Twenty-one.

[01:49:17] Twenty-one?

[01:49:17] Yeah, you're fine.

[01:49:18] Yeah, you're stable.

[01:49:19] But the cart definitely went over a speed bump kind of thing.

[01:49:25] An unexpected speed bump that rocked it really hard.

[01:49:30] You got Fintan and Kirk.

[01:49:34] You don't see a thing.

[01:49:35] You're like, what the fuck we hit?

[01:49:36] There's no obstructions.

[01:49:39] Copper.

[01:49:40] Finn fell over as well.

[01:49:42] Hmm?

[01:49:42] Yeah, you know.

[01:49:43] Yeah, an airboat fell.

[01:49:43] I know.

[01:49:44] Okay.

[01:49:45] Yeah, you guys like, you're looking around at the ground.

[01:49:47] You don't see anything.

[01:49:48] Oh, I see.

[01:49:48] Copper, though.

[01:49:49] You're getting up from where you fell and stuff like that, and you see for a moment this

[01:49:55] white face kind of slither out a window, or slither through a broken window, and you

[01:50:05] recognize the face.

[01:50:07] It's one of your friends from back in the day.

[01:50:10] Oh.

[01:50:11] Oh.

[01:50:11] Except their eyes are missing, and they have jagged teeth.

[01:50:15] That's a problem.

[01:50:16] Like jagged, lipless teeth.

[01:50:18] Okay.

[01:50:19] Should I be rolling something?

[01:50:20] Roll another wisdom.

[01:50:22] Should I?

[01:50:22] I don't know why I'm asking.

[01:50:25] Wisdom save or wisdom check?

[01:50:27] Wisdom check.

[01:50:30] Actually, I guess this one would be a wisdom save, because he's rolling against fear, basically.

[01:50:34] Okay.

[01:50:34] That's a save.

[01:50:35] Okay, fine.

[01:50:36] I gotta hit on this fucking paper.

[01:50:41] Nineteen.

[01:50:42] Okay, you are paralyzed with, like, fear?

[01:50:48] Like, seeing your friend.

[01:50:50] Jesus Christ.

[01:50:52] How high is this save?

[01:50:55] It was pretty bad.

[01:50:57] Apparently.

[01:50:58] Also, he's already, he's stayed time and time again.

[01:51:01] He is horribly traumatized by this experience.

[01:51:04] Yeah, this is, like, the trigger for my trauma.

[01:51:06] Like, it was definitely your friend's face, but they are missing their eyes.

[01:51:09] In fact, their eyes are just, what's left, where their eyes were, are just these blackened

[01:51:12] pits.

[01:51:13] Their face is completely, like, corpse white.

[01:51:15] And their lips were missing, and all that is is just, like, this, like, horrible, like,

[01:51:20] corpse smile.

[01:51:21] So it's a human.

[01:51:22] It was.

[01:51:23] It was a human face that slithered out of, like, just out of view over a corpse.

[01:51:26] I'm asking because I could have had a war for his friend.

[01:51:29] Is what I'm saying.

[01:51:30] Yeah, it was one of your human friends.

[01:51:31] Okay.

[01:51:32] So less important.

[01:51:33] Good.

[01:51:35] See, I could be racist, too.

[01:51:37] I'm not human.

[01:51:38] Yeah, fair.

[01:51:40] You would think you're human.

[01:51:41] That's true, I think you're human.

[01:51:43] But yeah, so, yeah.

[01:51:45] You guys, like, the cart comes to an abrupt stop.

[01:51:52] And Donke actually starts, like, thrashing in his car, or in the cart.

[01:51:59] Wait, did we bring your horse along as well?

[01:52:01] No.

[01:52:02] Okay.

[01:52:02] My horse kind of sacked.

[01:52:05] He's just grazing in the...

[01:52:07] Cut to Ashat.

[01:52:08] He's just grazing in the field near the barn.

[01:52:10] Mm-hmm.

[01:52:12] In his mind, he thinks, I'm really glad I didn't get taken on that bullshit adventure.

[01:52:16] Man, that last one was fucking nuts.

[01:52:18] I'm glad that I'm taking me back into the mist.

[01:52:21] But yeah, the Donke, as you're getting up, Fintan, from, like, your fall, you see, like,

[01:52:27] you hear your donkey just, like, whining, like, uncontrollably.

[01:52:32] And it actually kicks a hole through the cart with its agitation.

[01:52:38] Okay.

[01:52:39] Um, so.

[01:52:41] Mm-hmm.

[01:52:41] But yeah, that's, that's what you're like.

[01:52:44] You don't know why you guys tripped over, why the carts, like, went over something.

[01:52:47] You don't recognize what it did or anything.

[01:52:50] So.

[01:52:52] I'm assuming Rob has hopped off the cart and he's attempted to get my attention and I'm

[01:52:57] just paralyzed right now.

[01:52:58] Yeah, you're, you're, uh, you're currently going to suffer, uh, some, uh, a disadvantage

[01:53:02] for, for, for the time being.

[01:53:04] That's fair.

[01:53:04] Um, but yeah, like, you're able to, like, him nudging you kind of, like, breaks you up

[01:53:08] into paralysis.

[01:53:09] Okay.

[01:53:09] Um, but you saw what you saw.

[01:53:11] I did.

[01:53:13] Um.

[01:53:14] And I would say maybe I just banged my head, but I don't know if that would work for Warforged

[01:53:19] because it's not like.

[01:53:20] It could have been, like, discombobulated, like, some of your circuitry or your, um, your

[01:53:23] mechanicals could have been, like, discombobulated a bit.

[01:53:25] Maybe, but probably not.

[01:53:27] I know what I saw.

[01:53:30] But, um.

[01:53:31] There's something in there.

[01:53:31] So yeah, you guys are getting up or, like, kind of stopping out.

[01:53:34] Anybody going to go try and calm down donkey?

[01:53:36] Yes.

[01:53:36] Okay.

[01:53:37] Roll animal handling.

[01:53:38] Animal.

[01:53:39] Roll animal handling.

[01:53:46] That's not abysmal.

[01:53:48] Twelve.

[01:53:50] Twelve, you say.

[01:53:52] Um.

[01:53:53] I'm not proficient with animals.

[01:53:54] Yeah, it takes some time.

[01:53:55] Like, the, the donkey is very agitated about being in this area.

[01:54:00] Um.

[01:54:01] Yeah, like, it just does not like it whatsoever.

[01:54:03] Okay.

[01:54:04] How are the warforged, uh.

[01:54:06] Horses?

[01:54:07] Horses reacting.

[01:54:08] They're fine.

[01:54:12] Um.

[01:54:13] So.

[01:54:13] Yeah.

[01:54:14] I want to go back and retrace our card steps.

[01:54:16] Mm-hmm.

[01:54:17] And just kind of sort of kick my way along the ground.

[01:54:19] To see if there's anything invisible that I'm going to hit a game.

[01:54:23] Okay.

[01:54:24] Fair enough.

[01:54:25] Yeah.

[01:54:25] You, uh, you go back and retrace your steps.

[01:54:27] You're, like, kicking the dirt.

[01:54:28] Like, it's not really dirt.

[01:54:30] It's cobblestone.

[01:54:31] Yeah.

[01:54:31] But you're, you're kicking around to see if there's anything invisible?

[01:54:34] Nothing.

[01:54:35] Like, you go.

[01:54:36] Do you have any, um, animal companion sheets?

[01:54:43] Um.

[01:54:45] Yes.

[01:54:45] I think I do.

[01:54:50] Um.

[01:54:50] You, um.

[01:54:52] Yeah, you look, you're, like, kicking around.

[01:54:54] You're looking around.

[01:54:55] There's nothing here.

[01:54:57] Like, there's nothing on the ground.

[01:54:58] Like, that could have obstructed it.

[01:55:00] There's nothing invisible as you're, like, kicking around, like, trying to feel for something.

[01:55:03] There's no hole.

[01:55:03] There's not even a pothole.

[01:55:04] There's nothing.

[01:55:05] It's not that we can't see it.

[01:55:07] It's that there's currently nothing there.

[01:55:09] Yeah.

[01:55:09] Excellent.

[01:55:10] Thank you.

[01:55:10] That's what it seems like.

[01:55:11] Um.

[01:55:12] You look around at the buildings.

[01:55:14] Um.

[01:55:15] A lot of the windows appear to have been broken open from the inside.

[01:55:21] The glass is all on the outside.

[01:55:22] Yeah.

[01:55:23] Oh.

[01:55:24] That's not good.

[01:55:25] Where did you get the stats from the war horse?

[01:55:27] For the, uh.

[01:55:28] I just made an iron.

[01:55:29] I just put, I honestly didn't get some stats.

[01:55:32] Uh.

[01:55:33] I just called, I have the iron.

[01:55:35] There's gotta be an iron steed.

[01:55:36] Like a.

[01:55:37] Uh.

[01:55:38] Really?

[01:55:38] There's not?

[01:55:39] Okay.

[01:55:40] So, we could basically go somewhere between an iron defender, which is a metal, uh, metal

[01:55:45] dog.

[01:55:46] And a, um.

[01:55:50] And a war horse.

[01:55:51] Okay.

[01:55:52] Let's just go with that then.

[01:55:53] Okay.

[01:55:54] So then I will bastardize that.

[01:55:55] Yeah.

[01:55:57] Because I just used the, like the stats for the, the, like when I did that cut, that,

[01:56:01] that, uh, Wyvern.

[01:56:02] Um.

[01:56:03] That, like mechanical Wyvern.

[01:56:04] I just used the, uh, the iron defender stats for that one.

[01:56:08] Okay.

[01:56:09] I need my Eberron book.

[01:56:10] Uh.

[01:56:11] Eberron?

[01:56:11] Okay.

[01:56:12] I was using it.

[01:56:13] Ah.

[01:56:21] So basically I'll just compare the iron defender to the, to a dog.

[01:56:26] Yeah.

[01:56:26] Or a riding dog.

[01:56:27] And then the difference between them all make the same changes for a horse.

[01:56:32] Yeah.

[01:56:39] Unless I can find an iron steed for 5e.

[01:56:46] Iron steed Harley Davidson.

[01:56:52] I know what I'm naming mine.

[01:56:55] Harley and Davidson.

[01:56:56] Is it?

[01:56:56] Mm-hmm.

[01:56:57] Oh, I was going to name them Hack and Slash.

[01:57:00] That's cool.

[01:57:02] Because they're Lord of Blades horses and those are the names of the two, uh, the two from

[01:57:09] Reboot.

[01:57:10] Yeah.

[01:57:11] Mm.

[01:57:13] Also good.

[01:57:15] But we could name them Harley and Davidson.

[01:57:19] Mm-hmm.

[01:57:20] Um.

[01:57:21] You got to see if we can get them back to town first.

[01:57:25] Mm-hmm.

[01:57:27] Uh.

[01:57:27] So yeah, that's what you find there, um, Kirk.

[01:57:30] It's just like, there's nothing in the street that you can, that would have caused that.

[01:57:35] But the buildings, all the, all the shops along this, like, this road seem to have their

[01:57:40] windows broken through.

[01:57:42] So how far are we from the edge of the road?

[01:57:44] From the edge of the road?

[01:57:46] Um.

[01:57:46] You're probably about 20 feet away.

[01:57:50] Like, the middle of the road is, but the roads are probably about, like, 40, 50 feet

[01:57:53] across.

[01:57:54] Enough to, like, have a couple of carts go by.

[01:57:57] My pencil disappeared.

[01:58:00] Alright, so I'm gonna talk to Bo.

[01:58:03] Mm-hmm.

[01:58:03] And just sneak up and have a look inside the window of the closest shop.

[01:58:07] Okay.

[01:58:07] And see how it looks.

[01:58:09] Okay.

[01:58:10] As you're investigating that, I'm probably getting back to my feet and stumbling back against

[01:58:14] the cart being like, I saw something in one of those houses.

[01:58:18] Okay.

[01:58:19] So you, yeah, you hear that.

[01:58:22] As you're about to approach one of the, one of the shops.

[01:58:24] I'm still going to go home alone.

[01:58:26] Uh, we'll investigate.

[01:58:27] We'll investigation.

[01:58:32] Investigation.

[01:58:32] It's basically the active search in this game.

[01:58:36] Uh, 11.

[01:58:37] 11?

[01:58:38] Um, you find it's, it's a, uh...

[01:58:44] They fall on the couch, Aaron?

[01:58:45] It's a mostly dusty, um, shop.

[01:58:49] Like, none of the, none of the tables have been flipped over or anything.

[01:58:52] Like, it looks like it just, like, it was abandoned for five years.

[01:58:56] So it's not disturbed that all the way were blown out.

[01:58:59] Well, it's not, it's mostly not disturbed.

[01:59:01] The floor has very little dust on it.

[01:59:05] But everything else, like, you're looking at the, the tables and, like, the shelves and

[01:59:08] stuff, they all are caked in dust.

[01:59:10] The floors, though, seem rather clear of dust.

[01:59:13] But it hasn't been looted.

[01:59:14] No.

[01:59:15] It's not knocked over.

[01:59:16] Nothing's really been knocked over.

[01:59:18] Everything, it's pretty, like, there's, like, a couple of tables to the side.

[01:59:21] Um, maybe the tables were pushed to the side a little bit because, like, they're a little

[01:59:24] out of place.

[01:59:25] But otherwise, it's, like, like, everything is, nothing's, like, fully, like, knocked over.

[01:59:29] Like, nothing was ransacked.

[01:59:31] No footprints?

[01:59:32] There's no...

[01:59:33] No, no footprints.

[01:59:35] Disturbance in the dust?

[01:59:36] There is a...

[01:59:37] Is there dust?

[01:59:38] There's no dust on the floor.

[01:59:40] That you can, like, there's no, like, there should be, like, a layer of dust on the floor,

[01:59:45] like the, like the shelves and the tables.

[01:59:47] But it is very clean on the, on the floor.

[01:59:50] And you, you do hear a creaking of a door down the hallway, like, deeper into the, into

[01:59:55] the shop.

[01:59:56] Yeah, I'm not going that far.

[01:59:57] Okay.

[01:59:59] So, I think what we're dealing with here are Roombas.

[02:00:06] My God.

[02:00:07] I mean, they've taken over.

[02:00:09] When, when the, when the, when the arcane storm swept across here, it made all the room,

[02:00:14] all the, all the, all the, all the, uh, the roomforged, the roomforged, uh, say shit.

[02:00:21] Yep.

[02:00:22] But they've got, they've gone, uh, their AI's gone rogue.

[02:00:25] They're now, they're now an active one, like...

[02:00:27] The floors are in the room for the clean.

[02:00:29] The broom, the broomforged.

[02:00:31] Yeah.

[02:00:33] Yeah.

[02:00:33] The broomforged.

[02:00:34] Yeah.

[02:00:35] Because you know, like, once you build warforged, once you build war machines, like, that are,

[02:00:38] that are, like, robotic and stuff, you know that, that, how, the house, Kenneth was probably

[02:00:42] working on, on, like, other appliance things.

[02:00:45] Yeah, totally.

[02:00:47] Once they got, like, human-orded war machines down, it's like, all right, what else can

[02:00:50] we apply this material, this technology to?

[02:00:53] Broombots.

[02:00:54] Man, I hate using brooms.

[02:00:55] Man, I hate...

[02:00:56] Broombots.

[02:00:57] I hate cleaning my room.

[02:00:58] If only we had, like, a cat-sized warforged that could just sweep our floors.

[02:01:07] See if we can find the schematics and start selling them.

[02:01:09] Yes.

[02:01:11] Um, but yeah, otherwise it's, yeah, there's nothing else there except for that, um, for what

[02:01:17] you're in the, behind, like, down the hallway, deeper in the...

[02:01:20] the shop.

[02:01:22] And the strangely immaculate floor.

[02:01:29] So, from the window, do I see a cash register?

[02:01:33] Yep.

[02:01:36] Are you going to try and get to it?

[02:01:39] Am I, am I going to try penny theft at the risk of my life?

[02:01:44] Yes.

[02:01:45] Yes, I am.

[02:01:45] Uh, roll, if you want to be cautious about it, you can roll a stealth.

[02:01:49] Or are you just going to...

[02:01:50] Well, I'm going to call back to the guys and say, all right, I'm going to be able to

[02:01:53] check out this store.

[02:01:55] Watch my back.

[02:01:57] Does anybody come over to help me out?

[02:02:00] Yep.

[02:02:01] Rob, go in there and help him.

[02:02:03] You got this, Rob.

[02:02:05] Rob comes with you.

[02:02:06] Rob looks back with, like, big puppy dog eyes.

[02:02:08] He's like...

[02:02:10] Sad face emoji.

[02:02:11] All right, I'm going to stealth check it.

[02:02:12] Don't worry, I'll be right behind you, Rob.

[02:02:15] That's a crit.

[02:02:16] That's a crit?

[02:02:16] Quit my stealth check.

[02:02:17] I'm going to sneak in to the catfish door.

[02:02:19] Okay.

[02:02:20] Yeah, you walk...

[02:02:21] You turn...

[02:02:21] You go over the wall...

[02:02:22] Over the counter.

[02:02:24] And, uh...

[02:02:25] Like, you make no sound whatsoever.

[02:02:27] Avoid all the broken glass.

[02:02:29] Yep.

[02:02:30] Yeah, there's no...

[02:02:30] Rob's right behind you.

[02:02:32] Yeah.

[02:02:33] Yeah, now he has to roll.

[02:02:34] No, actually, no.

[02:02:35] Now Rob has to roll his stealth test.

[02:02:37] Yeah.

[02:02:37] Honestly, though, if I'm seeing him actually starting to sneak in, I'd be not telling Rob to

[02:02:41] be right up on his ass.

[02:02:43] Okay.

[02:02:43] Well, he's still going in, though, right?

[02:02:44] Well, just like stepping in the front door and waiting there and keeping an eye on him,

[02:02:48] basically.

[02:02:49] Still roll his stealth.

[02:02:49] Okay, fine.

[02:02:50] Ah, shit.

[02:02:53] You asked for help.

[02:02:54] This is the help you get.

[02:02:55] I said watch my back.

[02:02:57] Don't give away my position.

[02:02:58] You're going to be fine.

[02:02:59] Yeah, I'll watch your back from across the street.

[02:03:03] You got range?

[02:03:04] Come on.

[02:03:04] Yeah.

[02:03:06] Not vision, though.

[02:03:08] That's pretty good.

[02:03:11] Does he have sort of a total of 17?

[02:03:16] Okay.

[02:03:17] Okay.

[02:03:19] So, yeah, you get over to the cash register.

[02:03:23] Roll.

[02:03:25] You've got lockpick tools.

[02:03:26] You don't have to roll.

[02:03:28] You know how the old cash registers work.

[02:03:31] You're just like, bing, and done.

[02:03:33] I just, I fonzie it.

[02:03:35] I smack the side.

[02:03:36] It pops open.

[02:03:36] It's a light tap.

[02:03:37] I think you missed that because of this.

[02:03:40] Yeah, it was a light tap.

[02:03:41] And you find about 150 gold.

[02:03:43] Nice.

[02:03:44] All right.

[02:03:48] And, uh...

[02:03:50] Actually, you know what?

[02:03:51] Hang on.

[02:03:51] Hang on.

[02:03:52] You'll find 150 gold.

[02:03:54] You'll find 130 silver.

[02:03:57] And 8 platinum.

[02:03:59] 8 platinum?

[02:04:00] Wow.

[02:04:01] And 19 copper.

[02:04:02] How much silver?

[02:04:03] So, 130 silver.

[02:04:06] 8 platinum coins.

[02:04:09] And 190 silver.

[02:04:12] Or 190 copper.

[02:04:15] That's a lot of me.

[02:04:16] Yeah.

[02:04:17] Yeah, they're all just...

[02:04:19] Hey!

[02:04:20] Just like copper coins with copper's face.

[02:04:23] It's like...

[02:04:23] Yeah.

[02:04:24] Like Buddy Christ.

[02:04:25] Totally.

[02:04:26] Buddy copper.

[02:04:29] 11 coins.

[02:04:30] I had no idea you were such an important figure in this land.

[02:04:34] You know it.

[02:04:36] And you, uh...

[02:04:38] Are heading back out?

[02:04:41] I guess.

[02:04:42] Are you looking...

[02:04:42] Are you going to...

[02:04:43] Like, again, you do hear again that, like, a little bit...

[02:04:45] Like a light creak from that door.

[02:04:47] Like, down the hallway.

[02:04:49] It's out of range.

[02:04:50] You can't see it.

[02:04:51] But it's down a hall.

[02:04:52] You can hear, like, a creaking of, like, hinges.

[02:04:53] Do I hear it from the outer doorway?

[02:04:55] No.

[02:04:56] It's probably just the wind.

[02:04:58] I'm gonna get out.

[02:05:00] Okay.

[02:05:00] Roll another, uh, step.

[02:05:04] Uh...

[02:05:06] 19.

[02:05:08] Okay.

[02:05:09] You, uh, get...

[02:05:09] You tiptoe your way back out and you, like, look back just like...

[02:05:13] There's nothing there.

[02:05:16] Alright.

[02:05:17] So I found some cash.

[02:05:18] Nothing's disturbed in there.

[02:05:21] I didn't really see or hear anything.

[02:05:24] I think we're alone here.

[02:05:25] Was this the room, uh, the building that I saw my friend's face in?

[02:05:29] This was the...

[02:05:29] This was the house.

[02:05:31] Or the shop.

[02:05:31] Okay.

[02:05:32] Well, you didn't see anything, but I sure as hell saw something when we fell.

[02:05:36] I'm not going in to check it out, but I think there's something in this building.

[02:05:40] That's all I'm saying.

[02:05:42] Well, you're the magical one, but there is nothing that my elf eyes can see.

[02:05:50] From where I'm standing, which is at the door...

[02:05:52] Yeah.

[02:05:53] I don't see anything, so I think we've checked out everything.

[02:05:57] You, uh, as you're, like, looking in, so that you do hear, like, that...

[02:06:03] You do hear slightly...

[02:06:04] It's a little bit louder.

[02:06:05] Mm-hmm.

[02:06:07] Just the wind.

[02:06:08] Is it windy?

[02:06:09] No.

[02:06:10] Not even a breeze.

[02:06:14] A cast gust.

[02:06:17] Now it's windy.

[02:06:18] That's all it is.

[02:06:19] Is it...

[02:06:20] Now it's just the river in...

[02:06:24] Shut up.

[02:06:26] Because it doesn't work in ever on.

[02:06:28] Oh, I see.

[02:06:29] Yeah.

[02:06:31] It's nothing.

[02:06:32] We're not going in there.

[02:06:33] Let's keep going.

[02:06:34] Yeah.

[02:06:35] Okay.

[02:06:35] I'm fine with that.

[02:06:36] I do not want to investigate.

[02:06:37] Okay.

[02:06:39] Um...

[02:06:40] So, Fintan.

[02:06:41] You're dealing with your horse.

[02:06:43] Or your, uh...

[02:06:44] Your donkey.

[02:06:44] Yeah.

[02:06:45] Yeah.

[02:06:46] Um...

[02:06:47] There is, uh...

[02:06:49] Yeah, the donkey eventually...

[02:06:51] It takes, like, a good couple of minutes for you to actually calm down your donkey.

[02:06:54] But it looks severely spooked by something.

[02:06:57] Okay.

[02:06:59] Um...

[02:07:00] But you manage to, like, calm it down.

[02:07:01] And I'll give him an apple.

[02:07:03] Oh, nice.

[02:07:05] Um...

[02:07:06] And, uh, you...

[02:07:07] Once you get him settled down, you, like, hop back out of your cart?

[02:07:10] Or out of the cart?

[02:07:11] I guess so, yeah.

[02:07:12] To join your friends and such?

[02:07:13] Yep.

[02:07:14] Okay.

[02:07:15] Okay.

[02:07:15] And, uh, are you guys going to continue trekking, uh, on foot?

[02:07:18] Or will I take the land cart?

[02:07:19] No, we're still taking the land cart.

[02:07:21] Okay.

[02:07:22] So you hop back in the land cart.

[02:07:23] Mm-hmm.

[02:07:24] We're just gonna go at speed bump speed.

[02:07:27] Yeah.

[02:07:28] Speed bump speed?

[02:07:29] Okay.

[02:07:30] That makes sense to me.

[02:07:31] Mm-hmm.

[02:07:32] Hopefully then none of us go flying off.

[02:07:34] Mm-hmm.

[02:07:35] I'll be holding on a little bit harder.

[02:07:37] So...

[02:07:37] It's not too far.

[02:07:38] Like, again, like, it's...

[02:07:39] You guys were kind of, like, you're...

[02:07:40] It's basically down, um...

[02:07:42] Like, it's like a downtown strip.

[02:07:43] And you can see the TD bank.

[02:07:46] Uh, at, like, basically at the junction to, like, the next, like, lane...

[02:07:49] The next, like, road.

[02:07:51] Mm-hmm.

[02:07:51] Um, like, ahead of you guys.

[02:07:52] And you guys are about, like, maybe four or five buildings.

[02:07:57] Um, to, like, up from it.

[02:07:59] Uh, so you start heading down that way.

[02:08:01] Everybody roll.

[02:08:01] Will saves.

[02:08:02] Or wisdom saves.

[02:08:07] Followed by deck saves.

[02:08:10] 18.

[02:08:11] 18?

[02:08:12] Okay.

[02:08:16] 20.

[02:08:17] 20?

[02:08:18] Okay.

[02:08:20] So 18 was for the wisdom save.

[02:08:22] The dex...

[02:08:22] Uh, the 20 was the dex?

[02:08:28] Well, it doesn't say it anymore.

[02:08:29] But I rolled a one again.

[02:08:31] Was that for the wisdom save or the dex?

[02:08:33] For the first one.

[02:08:34] So the wisdom save.

[02:08:34] Okay.

[02:08:38] 14 and 19.

[02:08:39] Okay.

[02:08:40] So...

[02:08:41] And what'd you get for the...

[02:08:44] No, I rolled a 17.

[02:08:45] Okay.

[02:08:46] So you guys are just, like, you're holding on, because, like, in case, like, there's another,

[02:08:51] like, bump or something like that.

[02:08:54] And the cart gets rocked by something.

[02:08:58] Like, something smashed into the side of it.

[02:09:02] And, like, almost knocks it over.

[02:09:04] But it, like...

[02:09:05] Like, it, like...

[02:09:09] And again, we see nothing?

[02:09:11] You see nothing.

[02:09:15] Okay.

[02:09:15] Like, you look...

[02:09:17] You guys all, like...

[02:09:17] Like, after you, like...

[02:09:19] Some of you...

[02:09:20] Like, one or two of you guys, like, while you're holding on, you, like, quickly look to where

[02:09:23] the impact was.

[02:09:25] And, like, you don't see anything.

[02:09:31] The donkey...

[02:09:32] Is it dark right now?

[02:09:33] No, it's about midday.

[02:09:34] So it's...

[02:09:36] It's overcast, like, kind of low light.

[02:09:39] Like, it's not, like, inhibiting, but it's, like...

[02:09:43] It's, like, a heavily overcast day.

[02:09:46] The donkey lashes...

[02:09:48] Starts, like, freaking out again and actually jumps, like, breaks out of the cart of the

[02:09:53] back.

[02:09:54] Sleep.

[02:09:56] Okay.

[02:09:57] It gets about five feet out of the cart and then just...

[02:10:01] Popples.

[02:10:01] Getting tired of that donkey.

[02:10:05] You look...

[02:10:06] You look over to where the, um...

[02:10:07] You know that the donkey has stats that can make sense to you, right?

[02:10:11] No, I know.

[02:10:12] I'm...

[02:10:13] Yeah, yeah.

[02:10:14] I don't think it's gonna win.

[02:10:16] It's not gonna win.

[02:10:17] It's a mage-fred donkey.

[02:10:19] No, the problem is...

[02:10:20] The problem is...

[02:10:21] It is...

[02:10:22] It is making its checks.

[02:10:24] You're the ones who aren't making the checks.

[02:10:26] Anyways.

[02:10:28] Um...

[02:10:28] But, uh...

[02:10:30] You guys...

[02:10:31] Are you guys gonna inspect the impact side?

[02:10:34] I guess.

[02:10:36] Uh...

[02:10:36] At least lean over.

[02:10:38] Yeah, you look over it, because the cart was actually charting the list.

[02:10:42] Um...

[02:10:42] Something shattered the, uh...

[02:10:44] The wagon wheel.

[02:10:46] Mend.

[02:10:46] Yeah.

[02:10:47] No, that's fine.

[02:10:48] Yeah.

[02:10:48] That's horrible.

[02:10:49] I think it takes me...

[02:10:50] It takes me a solid minute, so I'll have to get out and...

[02:10:52] Uh...

[02:10:53] I'll inspector gadget it with my...

[02:10:54] My pinky...

[02:10:55] Or my index finger at the end of it popping off.

[02:10:58] And then it's just like a little welder.

[02:10:59] A little magic welder.

[02:11:00] Mm-hmm.

[02:11:00] So...

[02:11:01] I'm...

[02:11:01] At his back.

[02:11:02] Arrow cocked.

[02:11:03] What did I do?

[02:11:05] Oh.

[02:11:05] No, no, no.

[02:11:06] I'm watching your back.

[02:11:07] Just get to work faster.

[02:11:09] Um...

[02:11:10] Everybody roll me another wisdom save.

[02:11:13] How am I not making these wisdom saves?

[02:11:15] It's a very interesting situation.

[02:11:19] Twelve.

[02:11:21] Okay.

[02:11:22] Seven.

[02:11:23] Seven.

[02:11:23] Okay.

[02:11:27] Aaron does not look pleased.

[02:11:28] He looks really angry.

[02:11:33] Nine.

[02:11:34] Nine?

[02:11:35] Okay.

[02:11:36] So...

[02:11:36] A guy loves me.

[02:11:38] Sometimes.

[02:11:39] You guys are, like, hopping out, like, you're doing the mending, um, uh, copper.

[02:11:44] Curseless.

[02:11:44] You're, you're, you're pointing your arrow around.

[02:11:47] You're, like, surveying, scanning the area.

[02:11:50] Scanning all the empty, uh, the empty windows of the shops and stuff like that.

[02:11:53] The cart.

[02:11:55] The lack of a, of a donkey behind the cart where it fell.

[02:12:00] The other...

[02:12:00] Wait.

[02:12:01] Where's the donkey?

[02:12:04] Where's the fuck the, where the fuck is the donkey?

[02:12:08] It was right there.

[02:12:09] Where'd it go?

[02:12:11] Hey.

[02:12:12] Your donkey's gone.

[02:12:12] Where's your fucking donkey?

[02:12:20] As Aaron angrily crosses his arms.

[02:12:25] Do you guys want to roll a, uh, perception?

[02:12:28] To try and see if we can hear anything?

[02:12:30] Like, any, any sign of your, your donkey?

[02:12:36] Or investigate out loud as well, but...

[02:12:39] He's actively looking.

[02:12:43] Well, he's off his ass.

[02:12:47] No, his ass is out of control.

[02:12:49] Oh, it's gone.

[02:12:54] Thirteen.

[02:12:57] You guys are, like, you, you, you start looking around, like, you get, like, go to where,

[02:13:02] where the donkey is.

[02:13:04] Or where he was.

[02:13:06] Um, you, you start looking around, like, some of the buildings that, like, there's a couple

[02:13:10] of avenues it might have, like, gone off to somewhere if it, somehow it broke out of

[02:13:14] its sleep so easily.

[02:13:15] Like, there's, like, two or three alleyways.

[02:13:17] Um, but, like, you don't hear anything.

[02:13:21] Gonna call out to it silently.

[02:13:23] Donkey, get your fine ass back here.

[02:13:28] Okay.

[02:13:29] So you're telepathically?

[02:13:30] It's not fine, it's got the airway.

[02:13:31] Mm-hmm.

[02:13:31] Okay.

[02:13:32] Um, you get back, not words, but, like, emotional distress and, like, struggle.

[02:13:38] Um, that way.

[02:13:41] And it's, like, basically it's down one of the alleyways behind one of the, actually

[02:13:45] behind the, the, the shop that you guys, that, that they were investigating.

[02:13:49] Okay.

[02:13:49] I'm gonna take off that way.

[02:13:51] Okay.

[02:13:51] He starts running toward that way.

[02:13:52] What are you guys doing?

[02:13:54] Uh, I'm gonna follow him.

[02:13:56] Should I finish working on this or follow him as well?

[02:13:58] No, you follow us.

[02:13:59] Stick together.

[02:14:00] Okay.

[02:14:00] This is gonna be a problem.

[02:14:01] It was nice having a land cart.

[02:14:03] As I run away.

[02:14:06] Uh, Rob, I assume, is also coming with you.

[02:14:09] Actually, where's Rob?

[02:14:11] He was right beside me.

[02:14:12] He was.

[02:14:16] Put the land cart in your bag of holding.

[02:14:22] If only.

[02:14:24] Is it now a garage of holding?

[02:14:26] Why not?

[02:14:27] Can I actually?

[02:14:29] It holds quite a big volume.

[02:14:31] Can it actually, like, fit that?

[02:14:33] That's probably like, how do you fit that thing through the, through the bag of holding?

[02:14:37] Magic.

[02:14:38] That, yeah.

[02:14:39] You just gotta fit part of it through and then the rest just kinda follows suit.

[02:14:43] That's how Looney Tunes bullshit is, though.

[02:14:44] Yes.

[02:14:45] Magic.

[02:14:46] I have a, a, a bag of hammer space.

[02:14:50] I have two of them.

[02:14:51] That's true.

[02:14:52] Bag of what?

[02:14:53] Hammer space.

[02:14:54] It's a meme.

[02:14:55] Uh oh.

[02:14:56] It's not a meme.

[02:14:57] It's kind of a meme.

[02:14:58] Is it?

[02:14:58] Yeah.

[02:14:58] It's basically what they refer to as, like, cartoony logic of Bugs Bunny pulling a hammer

[02:15:04] out of his ass.

[02:15:05] That's a meme.

[02:15:06] That, that counts as a meme.

[02:15:07] Okay.

[02:15:08] I thought it was older than memes were.

[02:15:10] Memes?

[02:15:11] Older than ideas?

[02:15:13] That's what a meme is?

[02:15:14] Well, before they were called memes.

[02:15:16] Okay.

[02:15:16] Anyway.

[02:15:17] Um, so yeah, you're, you're not exceeding a volume of 64 cubic feet.

[02:15:23] How big is 64 cubic feet?

[02:15:27] Eight.

[02:15:27] Eight by eight by one.

[02:15:31] That's pretty small.

[02:15:33] Yep.

[02:15:35] I'm gonna have to make a, a big duffel bag of holding soon.

[02:15:40] Okay, so, um.

[02:15:42] Horrible hole.

[02:15:45] I will say, um, where, where, um.

[02:15:48] Wow.

[02:15:48] I will say, actually, uh, copper.

[02:15:52] Mm-hmm.

[02:15:54] Um, where Rob was, there are some scratch, uh, some, like, some scratch marks, like, like

[02:16:01] he was, he tried to, like, struggle against whatever grabbed him or whatever, wherever

[02:16:06] he went.

[02:16:07] Like, there, it seems like there was a struggle, like, there were signs of a struggle, like

[02:16:10] he actually had claw marks, like, dragging him in, in, in an, in the opposite direction,

[02:16:15] the other, another alleyway across the street from where Fintan is currently running.

[02:16:19] So, let's go into a different alleyway.

[02:16:21] Yep.

[02:16:22] Ah, shit.

[02:16:26] So, as they're both running towards that alleyway, I'm like.

[02:16:29] Don't split the party.

[02:16:31] They took Rob!

[02:16:34] Okay, um.

[02:16:37] I want to stick with them, just so we can plow through whatever that problem is and go get

[02:16:44] Rob real quick.

[02:16:45] Like, compared to me trying to get Rob by myself and me getting owned and them being

[02:16:49] short-handed one, an extra person.

[02:16:51] Okay.

[02:16:53] It is paining me to do so.

[02:16:59] Fair enough.

[02:17:00] While I'm on route, I want to go into my pack and I want to get the rope.

[02:17:05] Yep.

[02:17:07] And I'm going to nod it around my waist in the middle.

[02:17:11] And as soon as I get to him, I'm tying off to him.

[02:17:15] Okay.

[02:17:17] And as soon as the Warforge gets to me...

[02:17:19] I have a name.

[02:17:20] As soon as the Warforge gets to you.

[02:17:24] If that creature arrives here, I will tie off to it as well.

[02:17:29] Okay.

[02:17:32] With the other end.

[02:17:33] So, I'm in the middle.

[02:17:34] I got my flankers.

[02:17:38] Portable hole might work.

[02:17:40] Oh, we're still on that?

[02:17:41] We're still on that.

[02:17:42] Well, because it's a six foot diameter.

[02:17:44] Yeah.

[02:17:45] And ten feet deep.

[02:17:48] Okay.

[02:17:49] So, we need a puddle jumper.

[02:17:55] Okay.

[02:17:57] So, yeah.

[02:17:58] You guys are...

[02:17:59] So, Fintan is running toward that alleyway.

[02:18:04] You're up with Kirkless.

[02:18:05] You're following him.

[02:18:06] Like, you've also tied up.

[02:18:07] Like, you're like, here, tie this up to yourself.

[02:18:09] And you, Warforge, tie this up to yourself.

[02:18:14] And you follow down that alleyway.

[02:18:16] You go behind the original...

[02:18:18] Like, that shot that you were investigating initially.

[02:18:23] Wisdom safes.

[02:18:26] That's our favorite role today.

[02:18:27] Yeah.

[02:18:28] Welcome to the Morelands.

[02:18:29] Yeah.

[02:18:32] Let's just say I found a very thick obstacle for you guys in the Morelands.

[02:18:38] Nine.

[02:18:39] Nine.