(D&D5e): Eberron: The B-Team One-Shot: The Winter Witch

[00:01:02] One Less Die, a D20 5e actual play podcast. We are playing a one-shot of our Eberron games, special game of the B-Team. Duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh. Yeah, I didn't even call it a one-shot. This is the second time we've done this. This is a series of one-shots. Oh, okay. It's a mini-series within the A Shots Adventurers games. It's a double-tap. Yeah. Soon we'll be going full-auto.

[00:01:31] So, yeah, before we begin, interest of the characters, starting on my right. Oh, that's me. Yep, I'm legalized Greenleaf. I'm a druid. A wood-elf druid. Yeah, yeah. I really, really enjoy my Greenleaf. Yeah. And that was Eryn playing legalized Greenleaf.

[00:02:01] Shhhhhh. And next up is Merit. Hi. I'm Merit. I'm playing Richard Dufromage. A snooty, arrogant, douchebag, high elf wizard. Art Baill. With an annoying French accent. Baguette. Ho, ho, ho, ho. Oui, oui. We'll share. And keeping up with the last but not least, Jordan.

[00:02:28] Uh, yeah. I'm Jordan playing Sam Club Gunjeans, a barbarian halfling. Who also happens to be Russian. Small and mighty. Yeah. Tiny. I mean, we can't really say that about Russian. Yeah. Uh, alright. Um, so yeah, you guys are, we're gonna start you guys counting with media res. Like, you guys are already on the way to the quest.

[00:02:51] Um, so you guys were, uh, contacted by a woman, um, the sister of the airship captain that hangs out around, like, keeps frequencying around a shot. Um, uh, her name is Bella Twilo. Uh, and, uh, she, or rather her, her patron, because she is a warlock of, uh, her patron, um, uh, has wanted, uh, has wished for her to recruit some people to go up to the,

[00:03:19] um, we'll say the, uh, to the, the island, the half frozen island of Orthos. Um, just, basically just shy of the Frostfell, which is a giant arctic continent, um, north of, of the, of the continent of Corvair. And, um, she wants you, uh, apparently this archfey has, uh, wants her, her warlock to

[00:03:43] go with some people and deal with a situation in the town of Thumbrol and Kolkich. Um, didn't give her a whole lot of other information outside that apparently there's some kind of situation there that needs to be addressed. And as the patron, uh, an archfey patron, uh, according to the warlock, uh, she's just like, I don't want to piss her off, so I just wanted to do what she says. I'm willing to give you guys, like, 200 gold each. For the job.

[00:04:14] So, um, she has chartered a flight. I took good money for the B team. Yeah. Uh, it's done much worse for much less. I bet. Um, so she has chartered a flight with her brother's airship, uh, the Gilded Sparrow. Uh, Captain Twilo, uh, is going to be stopping there to drop you guys off and then is going to continue on to another couple of other ports before coming back within a couple of days.

[00:04:39] So you guys will have a few days at this, up in the Arctic, um, to, uh, to deal with whatever this, this situation is. Apparently there's, uh, some kind of chaos brewing in these two towns. Um, but, uh, yeah, that's a, it's been a couple of days on the airship, uh, and you guys are, it's starting to get cold, it's definitely starting to get chilly. Okay.

[00:05:02] Um, and, uh, as the ship kind of descends through the clouds, um, you see the, uh, the land ahead of you, um, snow-capped, uh, with woods and, with frozen woods and a large peak, uh, not too far away, kind of shadowing this, uh, this large, this large lake. And, uh, there are two settlements on either side of the lake. And, uh, actually I'll read this little transcription as you guys are heading into Tomberholm.

[00:05:28] Um, as the snow-covered trail, or as the snow-covered winds, um, uh, yeah. As the snow-covered trail winds through the forests, it opens up out onto the large lake bank occupied by the town of Tomberholm. The town seems to be composed of around 100 single-story buildings. Most buildings are built of cobblestone and logs.

[00:05:54] Faint lantern light emits from the windows of the buildings, reflecting off of the snow that covers the streets. In the center of the town sits a two-story, a two-story stone building with dwarven architecture. Beyond the town is the large lake. And, uh, as you move into the, uh, as, as the ship basically lands near the, the docks and such like that, um, you guys can hear a commotion, uh, down on, near the dockways.

[00:06:23] Uh, and, uh, standing on an overturned fishing boat is a mountain dwarf yelling to the crowd and pointing frantically at a town that sits upon the opposite bank of the lake. So, basically this is kind of happening as you guys, as the airship is landing and dropping off some stuff and you guys are kind of walking off the plank or up the, uh, the boardwalk. Uh, and you see, you hear this commotion. Um, and it's like, uh, hear this?

[00:06:49] Those, those bastards over in Kolkach are the reason for the lake's poison. There will not be, we will not let this stand. Clearly, uh, my, like, clearly this whole situation is all because of them. Those damn bastards in Kolkach. And what is my brother doing? Nothing. He sits in his, uh, sits in his, in his town hall thinking we can, uh, thinking that there's some kind of peace can be made.

[00:07:16] Mark me words. Peace is not an option here. Those bastards need to be put to a lesson. And it continues on and on, kind of like that kind of rhetoric. Um, and, uh, yeah, as you guys are kind of like hopping off the ship, um, uh, with, uh, with Bella in tow as well. She's like, uh, or her, her, her brother, the captain, uh, is like, alright Bella, uh, and the, uh, B team. We'll, uh, we'll see you in a couple of days.

[00:07:45] Um, looks over to the, the crowd is like, um, good luck! And then, alright through, let's pack it up, let's go! Woo! The GTFO! Yeah. Is the supplies dropped? Alright, let's go! Let's get the fuck outta here! Yeah. Um, yeah, you find yourselves on the, uh, basically in the dock region of this, uh, of this large, kind of, wintery town. Okay.

[00:08:14] Um, and actually just as, as you guys are kind of getting settled up, like standing around so that you can see that the crowds and stuff of that are beginning to disperse as, uh, this rally seems to be, uh, coming to an end. You guys can roll me, um, perception.

[00:08:45] That was a one? Well, you know what, at least you're getting it out now. Eleven? Eleven? Okay. Eight. Eight? Alright, so, Sam's, Sam's Club, you spot that like the, uh, the big boisterous dwarf and a couple of his lackeys, um, there, you can kind of see them like, hop off into the crowd, like, the disperseous crowd, and they seem to be heading toward a, uh, uh, what looks like a, a tavern of some sort. Which is funny, because I'm the shortest. Yeah. I'm the only one at their level. Yeah.

[00:09:14] Well, I guess the crowd dispersed enough that you can see them through the crowd. Ah, yes, we do. Alright, well, I guess Sam would look at the other two and just be like, um, the dwarf is going to the, uh, the, the inn. Drink? Well, we could, we could do that or we could, oh, this is Bella talking. Uh, well, we could do that or we could maybe, maybe we should actually, maybe we could go talk to the, uh, the guy who runs the town. I suppose. That's just my two, my two, my two, my two piece on this.

[00:09:44] Um. Is there not a good chance? Well, hold on, sorry. Tired of a good chance. Took me a second too. Is it not probable that the, uh, the town is also drinking? Drink? Fair? I think Sam's just gonna start walking towards the, uh, tavern. I know I've gone right, I think we'd rather smoke, but, uh, the iron is right there. Yeah.

[00:10:16] So you guys are gonna head over to the tavern? Yeah, that's where I'm going. Okay. I'm not bothering the way it's so... Yeah, fair. You're going in a tavern! Yeah, you see a... The other short guys are going, I mean? Yeah. Uh, alright, so you're heading over to the, uh, uh, the Miner's Flagon. Um, overlooking the Pescrail Lake sits... That's your miners? Yeah. Sits of the Miner's Flagon, a relatively large stone building with an overflowing mug of ale carved onto the swinging sign above the door. I like it, dude.

[00:10:46] Uh, a roar... As you enter the, uh, the bar, uh, a roaring fire burns from a hearth on the eastern side of the, of the common room as loud discussions about this coal pitch fill the room. Coal pitch? The, uh, uh... The opposite town. The town on the other side. You guys kind of got like a, uh, I'll say like Bella kind of like, let you guys know from what she's, uh, knows of the area. Um, the, there's a town called Tomberholm and on the other side of this lake, Lake Prescale,

[00:11:13] uh, or Pescrail, there is a, a town called, uh, Kolkuch. Um, she doesn't know a whole lot other than that. Um, if you guys want to roll, have any kind of history, you guys could roll that to see if you know anything about this town or its situation and such. Five. I don't think so. We're rolling places that aren't here. Yeah. We're rolling history? Oh yeah, it'd be a history roll, yeah. Yeah. Uh, good deal. Good deal. Okay.

[00:11:43] We'll have this. You are in the Frostfell. You're unsure that this is even a place. Yeah. I'm never in this place. You're just staring up that big mountain off in the distance. It's just overshadowing the lake and the town. That's way cooler than this. Eleven! Eleven? Um, yeah, you know that like, you've heard, you've vaguely heard of Tomberholm. It was, uh, about 600 years ago, it was, uh, set up by, by dwarven miners. Um, like mining out the mountain, mining out the mountains in the area.

[00:12:12] And, um, has since kind of turned into a fishing village when the, uh, all the ore and gems, um, dried up. Okay. So, it seems like they've, it's probably one of the few major settlements in, on this, on the island of Orthos and certainly up this far north. Um, you, you don't really know much about Kulkutch. Okay. Well, I will reiterate that to my companions. These go to the world.

[00:12:42] I mean. Yeah, so you have to know. Yeah. Uh, you entered the, Like being in Anchorage. Yeah. Yeah, basically. Welcome to Fantasy Anchorage. Um, yeah. As you're entering the, uh, yeah, you're entering the bar, or the tavern. Um, and, uh, you see, um, yeah, a number of people, um, talking away about this Kulkitch. And they have like a bunch of like, there's a bunch of conversations going that you guys could eavesdrop on and such.

[00:13:08] Um, but, um, at the, at the head, uh, over at the, uh, the, the, the serving area, the serving desk. Um, there is a halfling, um, there, uh, serving drinks. So she seems to be, uh, the barmaid. So she seems to be, uh, the barmaid. Or the, um, the bartender. All right. So, um, she seems rather, uh, happy to see new faces. She like kind of waves at you guys as they come in. Okay. Okay.

[00:13:39] But, uh, yeah, do you guys want to, uh, sorry, what race is she? She's a halfling. Okay. Yep. Freckles, curly, curly hair. I will take, uh, eight flag arms of your greatest, uh, strongest name. All right. Uh, yeah, frost, uh, a frost nipper, uh, frost nipper, uh, on the way. A frost nipper? Yeah. I feel like that's a, uh, racial slur, no? No?

[00:14:09] No? Um, yeah. So a few months, yeah, you guys go like sit down somewhere. Um, there's, there's a table nearby. Uh, and, um, a few moments later, um, somebody like, or she hands a bunch of drinks that she, uh, she, uh, she makes and they, uh, bring them over to you. Not her, but like some other like worker or employee. And it all happens? Uh, no, there's like mostly, they're mostly human and dwarves.

[00:14:37] And like the odd halfling in this town so far that you've seen. So, uh, yeah, once you get your drinks, um, what is everybody's passive perception? Where is the window? It should be at the 5 plus 3. 14. 14? 18! I don't know what I'm looking for.

[00:15:03] Um, so it's, uh, it's 8 plus, I think it's 10 plus your, yeah, it's 10 plus, uh, your, uh, your perception modifier. And if you have, uh, the proficiency then you also add that to it. Okay, cool. Yep. 12. 12. 12? Okay. Aaron! Um, you can roll a d6 for me.

[00:15:31] Okay, um, you hear, um, there's a human, a human woman at one of the nearby tables and she's like, it might be some kind of poison, but I have no doubt that a power of magic is play here. Like, that's kind of what you overhear in the conversation that's going on, like, next to you. Okay. At one of the tables. Um, she seems to be like a slender woman with, uh, long hair, um. But not a slender man. No. No.

[00:16:01] She is faceless. And she is wearing a suit and she's very tall. And she, like, she does have like a... She's stacked. No, just slender. You're good. You're good. Yes. We all did this, let's be honest. It wasn't just me. Only you. How dare. So, um, yeah, your, uh, your drinks are, are alive and so you guys are drinking and such.

[00:16:31] Uh, Sam's gonna try and see if he can wait for some sort of lull in the, uh, the halfling bartender's kind of work pace. Yep. To try and go over and see if he can talk to her as like halfling to halfling. Okay. Yeah. See how I'm with elves and everybody else is either human or dwarf. I'm the only one who has a comment. Okay. I'm the only one who has a little species here. Yeah. Um, yeah. You, you get about halfway through your drink and then like you see that it's lulled. Perfect. So I just go over and, uh, I don't know how one would actually speak halfling, but I would try to...

[00:17:01] Um, it's, honestly the Russian's fine. I'm trying to speak to her in halfling so we have a little bit of practice. Yeah. I mean, yeah. Um, yeah, it's just, it's a, we'll say that you're speaking in halfling. Right. So Sam would just ask, uh, no, no, when you're speaking common is with the Russian accent. When you're speaking halfling, it's no accent. Yeah. That's even better. Hello, good sir. So essentially in halfling, Sam would just ask, um, what should a group of adventurers

[00:17:29] from outside of town know about this lake in this area? Oh, um, hi. Uh, pretty forward, aren't you? Absolutely. Sam has no tact. That's fair. He's important to her. Uh, well, um, we are in a bit of a pickle in, uh, in town of late. Um, she's looking for a pickle. Seems the, uh, uh, seems the lake's been poisoned. Uh, we, uh, there's not been a lot of fishing going on. A lot of the fish have just come up, uh, and died.

[00:17:56] Um, and there's a lot of people in the town that are, um, are blaming that, uh, their woes and such on the, uh, from the, uh, the neighboring town, Kolkuch. And, uh, though I have heard also that, uh, there's some people that are suspecting some other foul play. Cause I mean, Kolkuch is just a bunch of, uh, fishermen and hunters and, and like ex-miners like the rest of us. So like, I don't think, unless there's some kind of wizard or, or, or, uh, or sorcerer of some kind of a foot here, I don't know. That's what I think.

[00:18:24] There might be some kind of foul play, um, either from that town or maybe from our town. Maybe somebody is trying to do something, but it's not good. Um, we're, I'm kind of expecting in the next couple of days, we're probably going to be going into, we're going to have some kind of a brawl or, uh, or, uh, an aggressive dispute. So, I'm going to give her 25 gold and mention, when we arrived, I heard a dwarf complain about

[00:18:53] his brother in the council. Would you happen to know anything about that? Uh, oh yes, that's, that's Bjorn. Um, he's, he's the, uh, the town master's brother, uh, Boren Rockfist, uh, and Bjorn Rockfist. Uh, Boren is the, is the mayor effectively of the town. Uh, and his brothers never really, again, got over the fact that people chose Boren over Bjorn. Um, Bjorn's out the blood. Um, he wants to, he wants to end Kolkuch once and for all. Uh, but Boren, he's a good, he's a good mayor.

[00:19:23] He's been trying to keep the peace. Uh, if you want to, if you're actually, if you're looking for some way, uh, some kind of, uh, uh, some kind of adventuring or anything like that, maybe you can help, uh, Boren or, uh, Boren, like, see if they can talk some peace or like find out what's going on with the lake. Uh, thank you. And I would just grab another drink and return to the table. Yeah. And she even like, she gives you two help, two of them for the 25 gold that you gave. Like, cause like, God damn. Sam would just smile and wink and walk back. Yeah.

[00:19:51] Oh, if you want, uh, if you want rooms, we have, uh, uh, you, that, that 25 gold will also cover a room, uh, a room for you and your friends as well. Well, it should be perfect. It might be great. Yeah. Yeah. It's like, you're really generous. Dude, I should have changed into that. A couple of gold a week. Yeah. For, for, for, uh, just, just, just to, for, uh, for, uh, uh, your knowledge, for future reference, um, a modest or comfortable, a comfortable meal is three silver.

[00:20:21] Um, a in-stay at a, at an aristocratic location would be four gold. You, you, you, the easiest way to buy honesty is with generosity. No, that's fair. Yeah. Just, yeah. I've made that mistake myself a couple of times. Here, George, here's $10,000 for a little bit of information. You are going to know everything. I am. I am going to know everything for that price. Yeah. Yeah.

[00:20:51] So that's, yeah. When, when, uh, uh, Sam's, Sam's Club gets back, you, that's what you guys will know, is that, um, Bjorn is the, is Boren's brother and Boren is trying to keep the peace while his brother's trying to incite war. Do you need your moonster manual? I have it right here. Do you need it? Not yet. So, who are we supposed to be helping? Hmm? Who are we supposed to be helping?

[00:21:18] Um, Bella has no idea. Like, she just knows that you guys, that you guys are supposed to look into, uh, some kind of situation that's here. I'm guessing it's the, uh, uh, it's this, this feud or this, uh, lake problem. You know how, how, how, how creatures from the Wildfey are. They're, they like to, they're riddles, they like their vagueness. I hope she didn't do that.

[00:21:45] Well, if we just fireball the whole place, come on, so. I don't think that's the answer. I, I can cast three fireballs now. I don't think that's the answer. Fine. I mean, I haven't, admittedly, I haven't been doing this, this adventuring thing as much as you guys, uh, uh, as nearly, like, about as much as you guys have, so.

[00:22:16] But I'm, I'm pretty sure you shouldn't just burn down a town. And maybe that's what we're trying to prevent? I think that depends on the town. What are you looking at there, Aaron? The creatures that I can turn into. Right, you're a druid. Yes. Is that what you want, level six? Or could you transform beforehand? I could transform beforehand. Okay.

[00:22:43] Uh, I thought, by being level six, I could turn into flying creatures, but I cannot yet. Uh, that's not so early. Gotcha. Um, also, actually, in this town, or in this tavern, um, there's that, that dwarf that was doing the, all the speech rhetoric and such. Hmm. Um, so, like, he, and he's still kind of going, like, off in the distance.

[00:23:08] Like, you guys can kind of hear him boisterously going on with some, some of the locals at his table. What is he saying? Can I go over here? Uh, yeah. Um, yeah. Um, yeah. If you're trying to, if you're actually purposely trying to look, like, listen to him, it's like, uh, them bastards over in Kolkutch poison pest grail. The new town master, Kolmack, is jealous of us, and intends to wipe us all out. Heed my words. That's why we gotta strike first. Burn that entire town to the ground.

[00:23:39] Alright, that's got my attention. Of course it does. So, am I alone on the table currently, or are these guys... No, they're all there, yeah. And eventually, yeah, he shows up and tells you, like, what he learned from, um, uh, uh, from, what we learned from the bartender. Does he actually never learn her name? Uh, oh yeah, her name, yeah, her name, uh, oh yeah, she never gave her name, but I'll say, like, she gave her name Ada. Alright. Yeah, Ada Cedar. Yeah, so just, when I got back, I would just reiterate everything I'd learned. Hmm.

[00:24:10] In other words, one brother's pissed off at the other one because everybody likes to have a little better. Because everyone wants peace. Well, I'm not sure what we are here for, but, uh, we're only getting 200 gold. I think if we go over and talk to that dwarf, we maybe have more gold for doing simpler job. We could also go to the town master and see if he wants us to help him and might give us some gold as well. Oh, fine. Sis, I'm just throwing that out there.

[00:24:40] You guys don't have to listen to Bella. But I'm just, like, being devil's advocate as the other, as the NPC. Alright, Bella. Let's go fucking find out what we're actually supposed to do. No, if you want to go and talk to Bjorn, you can do that. Stim's just having a beer. He don't care. Alright, let's go and see the town master. I think I've had two pints now. This is about the best time to be talking to a man.

[00:25:10] Nah. So you're going to the town master, not going to go talk to the dwarf across the room? No, I'm going to talk to the town master. Okay. Um, so you guys finish your drinks, uh, and get up back into the cold, blistering snow. Um, and, uh, walk through town, um, to the only sec, the, pretty well the only second story building that's in town.

[00:25:36] Um, in the center of Tomberholm lies a large two-story stone building with dwarven architecture. A spear-wielding guardsman lazily leans against the wall. Candlelight spills out of the half, of the hall's frozen over windows. Yeah, there's a guard there, just kind of at the door, just like lounging at the, uh, by the door. Um, sort of just like casually looking around, kind of obviously bored.

[00:26:02] Um, and as you guys approach, it's like, uh, what's your business? Travelers? Don't recognize you from town? I'm the shortest. I'm not exactly the projection of authority here. Yeah, he's a human, like guardsman too, but... Yeah, some sort of shit in comparison. Yeah. My companions and I, we have come to, uh, assist your master with his problem. Um, yeah, what he said.

[00:26:30] Okay, uh, give me a second, um, oh, uh, I'm going to go ahead and get up. Um, yeah, give me a second. So he walks, he takes it like a moment, like takes a step inside. You hear like muffled, it's like, there's some people here to talk to you. It's like, alright, some of them in, some of them. And, uh, then he comes back and he's like, um, we'll have to, uh, you'll have to surrender your weapons before you go in. I mean, this is probably a reasonable precaution honestly.

[00:26:59] Give me three of us. That's my stick? Uh, yeah, yeah. Oh, man. Can I keep my shield? It is not a weapon. True. It is not a weapon. You can keep the shield, but yeah, like both. Okay. Yeah. Also technically, your weapon is a frying pan. He does, he may not even know that that's a weapon. That's why I'm asking you with the shield, the frying pan, I can try it.

[00:27:25] Also, the two magic users, um, you guys can roll, um, sleight of hand. I have a quarter staff. I'm not hiding that. Okay. Okay. I mean, not comfortably. Yeah. I have a staff of the woodlands. It doesn't really look like a weapon staff. Yeah. I mean, if you only got it hard enough, walking stick. Would you deprive a man of his walking stiff man?

[00:27:56] Dude, I've gotten into so many concerts early by just bringing my cane. I'm not getting it. Standing in line. Screw your hand to my house. That hurts, doesn't it? I rolled a one. Wow! Okay. What have you done to my dice? Nothing. What did you do, Chris? Did you pee on it? Yes. I peed on it. Sounds like you. Sounds like you. Um, yeah, he's like, wait, wait, wait, hang on. Before-

[00:28:26] As he's like taking some of your weapons, he's like, wait. You're a wizard, aren't you? And you're a druid. No, man. I'm not a wizard. Alright, you guys can keep going, but I'm gonna have to come with you. Sorry. It's just further involved. You really would not be in the room with us. No, but it's what the job entails, sadly. So, yeah, he escorts you guys in as you walk in. You have no idea how accurate that is to being an actual soldier. Yeah.

[00:28:55] No, I don't want to be doing this, but I am. That's what they pay me to do. Not like every job ever. Yeah. I mean, who's them? Yeah, so inside, um, yeah, it's a candlelit room. It's pretty wide. Uh, there's a mahogany desk. Or, sorry, a mahogany table. Um, and at the head... Obviously a villain. Sure. Um, at the head of it is, uh, is Boren Rockvist.

[00:29:22] This dwarf in, um, like kind of, not noble, but like, well-to-do furs and such. Um, also appears to be a, um, a woman, uh, sitting next to him at the table. Um, uh, and they seem to be discussing something to do with the dead fish in Pesquerel. And the growing tensions in Kolkuch is just like, I just don't know what we're gonna do.

[00:29:46] There's like, we're gonna lose the, like, we can't get our fishermen out there to, to get some, find some, any kind of food. We're gonna starve this winter. Uh, and then there's the tension in Kolkuch. Like, we're gonna, we're gonna, like, my brother's being an utter tool and asshole. And trying to, trying to rile up the town. And it's just like, oh, oh, hi! Yes! The new... It's like, uh, yeah, the, the people that want to see you, Lord. So he would look up just in time to see Sam look at these guys and be like, checks out.

[00:30:16] What time of day is it? Um, at this point I'll say it's like, um, uh, it's probably like midday. I'm four beers deep in the day. Yeah. Yeah. Hey, you're the one who wanted to start at the tavern. Yeah. I mean, it was right there. When they got here. I'm not saying it was a bad call. Yeah. I'm just saying it might not have been the smartest. Yeah. This is why you're in barbarian. Yeah. Yes! So, good day sir.

[00:30:43] My associates and I, we have come to assist you with your ongoing troubles. Oh, really? That's, that's perfect. That's great. Um, yeah, um, I, uh, please sit. He like offers some chairs, like, one of the other servants kinda comes over and gives you guys, uh, offers you guys chairs. Is he currently seated? Yes. Damn. Uh, Sam's more or less not paying attention to what he's saying.

[00:31:10] He's just looking around to see what kind of state his guards and like the people around him are in. Like, do they seem better fed than everybody else? Um, no. They're, they're about the same as everybody else. Like, they're also kind of, uh, like they're, they're just, there's definitely a tension in the air. Like, so that they're just as worried and they're also just as like, they don't see, they don't seem like they're like, like, he's not like a portly guy that's like, oh, I can't, like, I don't know what we're gonna do with the, oh, fool. It's not like the two tier system. Yeah, no, it's, it, he's definitely seems like he's.

[00:31:39] Well, that's, that's what Sam was looking for. Is there a two tier system or are these guys suffering too? Yeah. Yeah. It seems like he is, like his family is suffering as much as this. Alright. That actually puts Sam more of these. Cause it's like, okay, these guys aren't entirely dicks because this sucks for them too. Um, uh, yeah. Um, so, so how did you, how did you hear, you don't seem like you're from around here. How did you come across this, uh, when you were sent here by a demon?

[00:32:16] Well, well, it's, it's true. Uh, we're currently dealing with a crisis of, uh, food shortages, um, and potential violence. Um, the, uh, yeah. Yeah.

[00:32:46] Our relations, um, with the other town, Polketsch, uh, with Tomberholm and stuff has never really been easy. Um, ever since its founding, uh, they're kind of, they, they're, but a hundred years ago, they, that town was founded from like a, from a battle with some, with some half orcs and orcs. Um, and, uh, the town kind of rose up from that and became an independent town across the way.

[00:33:09] Um, and we've sort of had some issues with like fishing rights on the lake, um, being two towns on either side of a lake. Um, and, um, yeah, uh, my brother has not been making things easier. Um, I don't know if you've gone to the tavern or been out near the docks, but like he's been stirring up, uh, problems there. And Sam's just nodding. Yeah. Um, he is the, uh, the short, loud mouth, yes? Yes. Yes, that would be him. Um, I'm, I'm not sure what to do.

[00:33:39] Uh, Colmack, um, I know, I know the, the, the town, the mayor of the other town, Colmack, uh, he's pretty new. Um, his father was the original mayor, was the mayor, but about a month ago, uh, he passed away and Colmack took over. And I know that that boy has had it in for our town since the day he was born. Um, no idea why, or outside of just the general past, like, grievances. But he seems vehemently against us.

[00:34:10] Um, I kind of, I blame, uh, I think I have some suspicions about his mother. Um, whoa! No, no, like, it's not like that, like, she is a conniving little bitch. Oh yeah? Well, your mother! That is my life!

[00:34:30] But, uh, yeah, um, if you, uh, if you want, if you want to help us, um, if you could go over there and, and see what you can find out about, like, see, see if you can find any clues or information about, like, maybe they are indeed poisoning the lake, like, uh, like everybody seems to suspect. Or maybe there is something else afoot. Um, at this point, I'm kind of starting to incline to agree that they are the cause of it. I know it's not on us. Um, as far as I can, as far as I know.

[00:35:00] Um, but, uh, yeah, something's going on and we're losing, we're, we're either going to have a violent uprising or, uh, we may have to just give up on the town altogether. But, I will be damned before I let that happen. So. So is this just, like, about food and stuff? Yeah. It would seem so. Sounds like it.

[00:35:29] I can, like, totally fix that. With ice? How much food can you conjure? Well, I don't really conjure it so much as just, like, make everything grow better. We are in ice. Here, you're in the tundra. Stuff still grows up here, man. This is why Sam's confused. He's like, in the ice? We're going to make the lake in grow really well, yes?

[00:36:00] Yeah, man. That'll attract the fish. And then these guys can eat all the fish. The problem is the fish in the lake are getting poisoned by something. Whoa. Who's poisoned? That's, that's why I want to. You should really get somebody to figure that out, man. How would you like a job? Sam, without saying anything, just looks at Richard. With a questioning look of, why is he here again? He is my dealer.

[00:36:30] If you recall, I am the one who charged the cannon last time. Oh no, he fully recalls. But it's moments like this where he questions. Also, just now I've realized this is the D&D equivalent of Pineapple Express. Essentially, it's your favorite. You know what? Wait, is it? I've actually never seen it. I know. It's basically like a guy at his dealer, like, have a shenanigans and adventure. And become best buds over the course of it. Essentially. Yeah.

[00:37:00] But yeah, you know what? Just for that, like you saying that, you can roll a haphazard persuasion test. Entirely under that. What are the odds of you being able to grow mushrooms? Like, really high. Yeah. As high as you'll be on the mushrooms level. Then you might be able to convince Sam to be on your side again. We can grow the mushrooms in the old mine. Yeah, there's the- Oh shit!

[00:37:30] That's a good idea. Yeah, the mountain is basically riddled with ancient- with old caves that like from when they- when the mines were- like it's literally a network. Oh shit. From what you- from- I think it was like you or him, no. Somebody knows and shared it. Yeah, someone here- Persuasion? Persuasion? 15. 15? Yeah, I mean, how would you like a job? I could offer 150 gold for you to go out there and then that to come back, or with the actual

[00:37:59] information that's usable. I don't know, what do you guys think? And that's 150 gold like altogether, not like each. So like 50 gold each for there and then 50 gold upon you guys return- like finding something that he can use. Yeah. That won't bring them to war. Or at least identify that yes, Kolkuch is responsible for this, now we have to go to war. I guess we can do that.

[00:38:30] Sam's a shark, he's not being hunted right now, he doesn't care. Okay. Belich is like- Idiots. Why? And yet it's still better than those asshats. Sam's literally just along for the ride. If this is where it goes, this is where it goes. Okay. Yeah. The elf guy, he's such a cunt. God, and that fucking ex-paladin.

[00:39:00] Every time with the damn silver fl- Ugh! He's not an ex-paladin. I thought you were. No, he's still a paladin. I just haven't leveled up my paladin in a while. Yeah, you've just been dabbling in other- In everything else. All of the other charisma-based classes. Yeah. Yeah. But, um... Yeah, so yeah, the town- The town master here is offering gold for you guys to go and investigate over at Kolkakch if you want.

[00:39:28] He doesn't want me to be a paladin of conquest, if you know what I mean. Yeah. So there's really not a paladin oath for me to take. Which is what I have to do next level. I mean, if you worded it just right. Oath of vengeance. Against a specific person in a specific way. Is all I'm saying. Get creative.

[00:39:59] Well, if we're doing that, I mean... We can do that. Sam just wants to chop something. Okay. Let's go. Okay. Okay. Alright. Then we'll go. So you guys agree to the town master's deal? We'll see what we can find out. Okay. If we get information that's gonna be useful to you, then we'll probably give you that information. But, like, maybe not. You know.

[00:40:28] Okay, then you'll only get the 150 that I give you now. You're gonna pay us now. You're gonna pay us now? I'm gonna pay you. You're gonna pay us now. I was gonna pay you half now. And then half on some good return. Yeah. And, like, if we come back with good information, then you pay us the rest of it. Yeah, it's totally cool, man. Okay. He just, like, looks to the guard. Looks to the guard. Looks to Bella. Just like...

[00:41:00] Yeah. It's like... How did it work? Sam's just looking at him waiting. Sam's just looking at him waiting, swinging his legs because he's half on him. Just a little feet, don't touch the floor. Just sitting here swinging his legs. Okay. So, yeah. You guys... The door closes as you guys get over the town master hall. Are you... Oh, were you going to actually give it... Like, oh, what about this mushroom idea? Or are you gonna say that until after? We'll try that after. Okay.

[00:41:30] If we get going, we can solve the problem with the violence. That'll be easier. That'll be easier. All right. Well, as you guys are getting out and talking about violence and stuff like that, you hear like a little, like, one of those like... Like a... Just like an orphan, but like a boy, like just... Like a boy... A busy one of those like boy criers. Like, hee-ree-hee-ree. Like... It's like... Need blades? Need hammers? Need violence? Uh, influence of destruction? Go to Lagro's blades! Lagro's blades!

[00:42:01] I want my stick back. Oh, yeah. He... Yeah. The guard gives you all his stick. Okay. Once you guys are out of the... The town hall. Except for yours. Unrelated. Yeah. Path of Berserker. Frenzy bonus action. Attack. I found it. It's... Oh! Bottom. Very bottom. Squeeze down there. Okay. Well, it is my writing and there was a lot of writing to put in there. So, you know. You know that the... There is a box on the other page for add additional features and stuff. Yeah.

[00:42:31] Didn't need to squeeze on the heads, but... But yeah, so yeah, there's just some like kid that's basically like advertising some local business called Magro's blades in the town. Or in the town square as you guys are walking out of the town hall. So, how far is it to the next town? Um... Well, it's across the lake, says Bella. Or the guard. Like the guard is like, well I mean it's across the lake there. You can see if you don't want to...

[00:42:57] Actually, no, you probably can't ask one of the fishermen here to take you there because they will probably shoot you on sight. That was Ubi Sam's question. You might want to take the road around the lake to get there. That's probably your best option. And how long will that take? Like... Oh, like three hours. Three hours trek. How much would it cost us for a little rowboat? I don't... That's even the worst idea.

[00:43:25] The problem is... We had a feud... We had like an issue with like fishing rights earlier. So like any boat coming from our side of the lake to them is probably going to stir up suspicion. And if you want to try that, I'm sure somebody will rent you their small rowboat or something. But... We had a fair and visibility.

[00:43:54] What if we're supposed to finish off? So... Do we have a cart? Can we rent that cart? Yeah, we have sleds or a... That we could offer you. With some horses, with some horse and tackle. Let's move. Wrestling wrapping. Some pelkin tackle. Whatever keeps me from having to do fucking walk. Okay. Actually, and Bella at this point is like... I mean, I also like... I have my horse.

[00:44:24] Like... It's a Velenor horse. One horse for four people. But like... We just need to get the cart. And then I can just use Kelpie to take it across over there. Alright, we rent the cart. Okay. Yeah, you guys walk over to like near the outskirts of town. Like where one of the gates are. And... Yeah, at the stables and such like that. Or there's a...

[00:44:49] There's an old dwarf tending to some tackle and such. And you guys saw us like that. Oh, hi! What can I help you with? We are looking to rent a cart to go around the lake. We have the horse. We just need a cart. Oh, alright. Yeah, that'll be... I can lend you a cart. Or rent a... You can rent a cart from me for... Let's say...

[00:45:20] Four gold. Four gold for a cart. Just a cart. Are we buying a cart? Do you see any other... Rent ours around here. Who wants to rent it to? You wanna roll persuasion to haggle? Ten. Ten. Ten. Uh... Two gold? Alright. Two gold. We will make two gold. Excellent. Alright.

[00:45:52] Um... Now are you sure we don't wanna rent a sleigh and eight reindeer? I'm pretty sure I don't want to work out for that. Oh, fuck. Okay. That's it. You, uh... Yeah, you get the cart and you put on, uh... Like, hook up the harnesses and stuff like that to, uh... To, uh... Bella's, uh, horse that just kind of appeared. Like, when she pointed at it. Uh... It is a...

[00:46:21] It is a Valinar steed, though. So, like, they're kind of... They're bred to be kind of, like... They're bred to be kind of, uh... Feywild-y. Sometimes. So... So I'm just not gonna question it. It's easier not to. Yeah. It's probably... Um... Yeah, uh... And in short order, you guys are... Going down... It's not actually like a cart. It's more like a sleigh. It is basically like a sleigh. Kind of like... It's on skids. Um... Or, uh... Skis rather than wheels. Because of the thick snow and stuff like that.

[00:46:51] Uh... And you do see that, like... The road, like... It stops being maintained about, like... Half a mile out. Because no one really goes out to the... To Colcutch. Like Manitoba's Saskatchewan. It's just a depression in the snow. Yeah. Basically. Manitoba's Saskatchewan! So you guys are basically just racing down across the, um... Around... Basically along the shoreline. Uh... From the lake. Um... And eventually, after about... Two and a half hours... Of, uh... Of this... Uh...

[00:47:20] You see the, um... The, uh... The log walls... Of, uh... Of the city limits of the... Of the other town. Uh... The... I will say, um... Tamborhome had a lot more, like... Infrastructure. Like the walls are actually more stone. And, like... Proper. These palisades are made mostly timber. Uh... In, uh... For, uh... Uh... About half... About half a mile... Uh... Into... Like toward... Coldcatch is when the snow again packs...

[00:47:49] It starts getting like packed out and it starts seeing like... You start seeing dirt in patches as well. As the road is actually well used before people just go off and away from the other town. Um... So... A well-traveled trail covered in a light frost winds around... Winds across the bank of the Pesquerel Lake into a gateway between tall palisades within... Uh... Between two... Uh... Between tall palisades. Within these wooden walls is the town of Coldcatch.

[00:48:19] It consists of nearly 70 log cabins, most of which feature smoke wafting up from cobblestone chimneys. At the back of the town is gathered a crowd outside of a large wooden stone log house. Standing atop a crate and calling out to the crowd is a young blonde-haired man flanked by two guards... Wildly... Wildly waving a rapier across the lake toward Tomberholm.

[00:48:49] Um... This guy... This kid is just kitted out to the nines of like noble kind of furs and such. And he is just going on and on. Very hateful speech and rhetoric about Tomberholm. Like those bastards... They're the... They've cursed Pesquerel Lake. We've seen it all happen again and again. It's why we found... Why my great-great-grandfather founded this town. Why we've maintained our independence from that blasted place for... For... For the last hundred years.

[00:49:19] You're missing it. Hmm? You're gonna be Trump voice. Trump voice. No, no, no. No, no, no. That was definitely the Biden voice. I can't do a... I can't do a Trump voice. No... I can't do a Trump voice. Um... But yeah, it's very...

[00:49:48] He's very, um... Fanatic. Like, very... Fanatical about his uh... His rhetoric... Sam would just kinda be doing the same thing that he did with the uh... Just kinda comparing, to see if... One's better fit than the other, trying to determine if there's that dichotomy. Yeah. Roll persuasion. Or not persuasion, sorry. Perception. Ten. Ten?

[00:50:15] Yeah, this guy's wearing really nice fancy clothes, and there are some people in town that are wearing nice and fancy stuff, but there are some people that are also in kind of, not rags, but they are definitely looking more waning. So there's a more perceptible difference. Yeah. Okay. There also seems to be a lot more, like, sketchier looking people in this town. Like, they're more like, it definitely seems like, you've been to some places on Corvair that have, like... Halfway Mob.

[00:50:45] Yeah, Halfway Mob. Yeah, exactly. You've been to Sharn a couple of times. I know what sketchy looks like. I am sketchy. Yeah. And there are, yeah, there's a bunch of people there that are just, like, going on and on. And he's going on about, like, it's clearly, like... I'll try and do a trumpet voice thing. It's like, it's clearly dwarven magic. Dwarves are the blame. Dwarves are the blame. We've got to build a wall and make the pay points. This just reminds me.

[00:51:14] So, somebody... There's a guy who does Dimension 20, I think is the podcast. It's like an actual play D&D game, I think. The guy's, like, really good, like, for doing, like, off-the-cuff kind of stuff. He was on this, like, talk show, like, internet talk show thing. And they had him ad-lib Sauron as Trump. Yeah. And it was amazing. He just whipped, like, off-the-cuff. And he just pulled it off so well. Just a quick attest to a show that I really like is actually Dum Dums and Dragons.

[00:51:45] I think I've heard of it. Yeah. I've heard of it. They're a group of Canadians, actually. Nice. I did not know that. They're voice actors and comedians. And they do... Cthulhu Chronicles, though, one season of it, though I wish they would do more. 40K. Regular D&D. They do Blood and Syrup. They have a Star Wars one. I think they have one other one. Nice. I had to check that out. But they're great because, like, it's voice actors and comedians. So, like, this is their jam. Yeah. Like, they're... They'll be able to let the dice tell the story.

[00:52:14] Because there's times where everything's going beautiful. And the plane's going flawless. And then everything nukes itself. And it's beautiful to listen to. Yeah. Nice. So, yeah. I'll get the competition. I mean, it's not really competition when they're actual voice actors and such. But, like, yeah. So, yeah. That's what you kind of get from Colmack and his... Gotcha. His spiel. And eventually the...

[00:52:44] And some of the crowd is like, yeah. And then there are actually a number of dwarves in the crowd. And they're just like... I'm really... It's like, no, not all dwarves. Yeah. But if you say that, you're part of the problem. That's literally what somebody says, isn't it? And then after the... After... Eventually the guy, like, gives up on his... Or doesn't quite give up.

[00:53:10] But, like, stops his hate speech and such toward Tomberholm. And leaves to do some stuff. And is accompanied by his two guards that just kind of flank him as he goes back into the longhouse. And the crowd starts dispersing again. And you... As you were traveling, like, to the center... Like, to where this...

[00:53:37] The longhouse was, you did see that there were some signs saying... Like, Town Masters Longhouse. Like, the Pesquerel Inn. Or the Orc Skull Tavern. So there's New York Skull Tavern. Yep. Sounds like my kind of place. So... We're in July. Maybe we should go into the... The Hedman's Longhouse.

[00:54:07] Mm-hmm. And offer our services. Okay. All right. I can follow that plan. Okay. So you're going to go into the Longhouse? Okay. Or the longhouse? We should go into the Longhouse. And offer our services to the next guy. Okay. All right. So as you start walking over to the Longhouse... I'll show you this. At the back of the town is this large longhouse. Built of wood and stone.

[00:54:38] Its front is covered in carvings depicting a group of warriors fighting off orcs. Two guards stand at the entrance. The two that were flanking... The two from the previous village. There was only one in the previous village. Um... The two that was twin brother. Yeah. The two that flanked the... Flanked the young master as he like got off the... Got off his little high horse and went back into his... Longhouse. Um... Uh... The two guards stand at the entrance. Is the horse hanging out with me? You okay?

[00:55:08] I was! Then he said that! Was I the horse? Oh no! God damn it! Oh! Where's the whole time? Uh... Whoa! Whoa! Now that I'm not dying. Yeah. The two guards are standing at the entrance. They have crossbows in hand. One is a tiefling woman and is leaning lazily on the wall. While the other, a young human man, is upright and vigilant. Um...

[00:55:37] Both of them like see you guys as your... Well, he's a tiefling woman so he's upright. Uh... Both of them see you son of a bitch. The worst part is Sam had the same idea. Uh... Uh... As you guys, uh, like approach, uh, the young man, the young human man, uh, speaks like, Hey, Dover! Look at these guys! You look, I don't think I recognize them from town! It's like, shut up, Mudrow! What do you want? Says the, uh, uh, the tiefling guard.

[00:56:07] Sam turns around pretending like they're talking to somebody else. We, uh, we heard that you were having some problems with the native town. Uh, we came to offer our services and your assistance. Yeah, we're like totally skilled at things. Okay. He is, at least, skilled at many things, but, uh, most of them involve getting high. Uh, she knows.

[00:56:35] Mudrow, go inside and see if, uh, see if the master wants to talk to these people. And I said, alright, I will! He's like, hops in. Goes inside. You hear some, like, screaming or some shouting, like, like, you fucking bastard! Uh, it's like, get, like, yes, of course I want to see somebody new! It's like, send them in! Send them in! Uh, he kind of comes out, um, uh, and he's like, alright, yeah, you can come in. Um, Turv, do you want to follow them in or should I? It's like, I'll do it.

[00:57:04] Um, and so, uh, Turv, the tiefling, kind of follows you guys in as you walk in. And, uh, uh, cool, man, as soon as you walk in, it's like, Strangers! Before you say anything, I need to know one thing. Are you friends of Tomberholm? Sam takes... I've never met him. Sam takes a second, looks at the fact that they also have their weapons, and just says, That?

[00:57:37] He, yeah. They let us keep our weapons. So, I mean, they've trusted us this far. Now hold on, Tomberholm, is that this one? No, so, Kukuch is the, is the one across the lake that you guys went to. Tomberholm was the one on the other side. That, that, that, this, this man was specifically shouting hate speech against. Are we friends from the last village? I've never met anybody named Tomberholm. I don't even speak the same language from the most times. Tomberholm. Yeah. So, maybe? I don't know. I don't know where I am. Tomberholm?

[00:58:07] That sounds like a halfling name. Do you know Tomberholm? No. Okay. Okay. Someone, okay. We are friends of no one here. Which is technically not a lie. Alright, you get to roll a, a persuasion at, at disadvantage. At disadvantage? Yeah, because of these guys talking. What? It's in the scenario. Oh. It's in both the scenarios. It's, it's something that you guys, six. I was just going to say, that's quite a great killer way.

[00:58:40] Turva, make sure these people, see themselves out of my, out of my town. And he just kind of like, with a huff, just kind of like, turns around and goes away. And Turva just like, pulls her crossbow at you guys. He's like, you're the master. You're not welcome in Kolkic. I mean, we can go and we can work for them. Or we can stay and we can work for you. You're the master. Would you rather have us as friends or would you rather have us as enemies?

[00:59:11] Sam very selectively grabs his shield and not his axe. Roll persuasion. Hold on. I'm just trying to get shot. This is going to get to do with that advantage in a moment. Is there a fireplace nearby? Yeah, of course. I am now a polar bear curling up by the fireplace. I'm just holding my shield trying to get shot. All 1,500 pounds of me. It's crying. I'm trying to fight. I mean.

[00:59:40] All right, take advantage. Still a 10. I taste it. I'm just in this. Okay. Look. You can't. You can't. No. No. You can't sleep there. Get off the carpet. Off the carpet. Bad bear. The boss doesn't want you guys in Kulkutch. I see you guys are adventurers.

[01:00:09] If you can get your buddy away from the fire and go to the inn or something like that. I won't kick you guys out of town, but you guys can't. Like the boss doesn't want to talk to you guys. All right. Sam will pass up on hiring a B team of adventurers. Are they still here? Kick them out. Kill them if you must. Says Elfmanus. He's like, I really don't want to get into a fight with you guys. No. You seem like your level six characters.

[01:00:40] At least. I am a bear. But I will say, like, if you don't leave the lodge soon, Kulmak's going to probably, like, rile up a mob after you. So you might want to just get out and, like, get away from the log house. All right. Sam will just hide you. Pull a patch of some of the druid's favorite green stuff that he stole forever ago. Because he knew it would be necessary at some point. Mm-hmm. And start doing the polar bear out using that. Okay.

[01:01:10] Okay. Are you going to allow this? Oh, yeah. Yeah, I'll allow it. How wide is that door? It's a double door. That's too bad. Yeah. I was hoping to force my way through. We haven't gone to the tavern yet. Yeah, that's true. We haven't gone to the tavern. But we don't hate the tavern yet. You're still a polar bear. That's true. So what you could do is, like, say. We don't ask me the polar bear. Walk to a bar. It'll just start to a joke that I would love to hear the end to. Yeah. So do you guys want to go to the tavern or the inn?

[01:01:40] The tavern. Okay. I mean, they're usually connected. No, there seem to be two establishments, like, in town. There's the Holiday Inn and the Wilder. If you crawl, it's still connected. True. That's true. That tavern crawl. In most... That would be such a good... That would be such a fun, like, D&D campaign. Right? Just tavern crawling. Just a bar crawl with random mobs in between. Yeah. No, the random mobs are bar fights you get into in the bar. Yeah, exactly.

[01:02:09] And then just as you drink, your stats get adjusted randomly. And you have to... You actually have to play it as a trinking game. So you guys... So as you play... I will... The more drunk you get. This is a Dat World game. Okay? We'll have to do this as a Dat World game. Okay. But yeah. I'm excited to see Balthazar get drunk. Yeah. But would it be Balthazar or it would be somebody new? Would it be somebody new? It could. I mean, it could. Anyway. Back to this game. So you guys get out.

[01:02:39] And Mudrow, the human, is like... Alright, Turbo. I overheard what you're saying. We gotta chase these guys out of town. He's like, shut your fucking trap, Mudrow. They're just... They're going away. As my snout comes out the door. Yeah, it's like... It's like... It's like, don't worry. I'll help him. Oh my god! And then it's like... Okay, at least I'm leaving. Yeah. Mudrow, you think he may have some pants mud? Just a minute. Quick! Fetch me my brown pants!

[01:03:09] Yeah. Yeah, suddenly the human guard is a little bit happy that you guys are just leaving. Okay. And Turbo, the team, is like... And by the authority vested in me from Colmack, the mayor of the mighty Colcutch town, never he... These... Never darken these doors again. I'm just like... She really is just... I don't care.

[01:03:39] I hate this. Fucking Corporal 10 gives no... Yeah. Okay. I'm going to turn back into my half-healthy form. Okay. Oh, you're half-healthy. Yeah. What's her name again? Her name is Turva. You don't know her last name. Turva. Yeah. Oh, that's... Hang on. That's Mrs. Scorn... Or that's Miss Scorn to you? All right, Miss Scorn. It's his favorite name.

[01:04:08] When you're done, you should come for a drink down to the tavern. You seem like somebody who would really appreciate a little green. Okay. I was going to make you roll disadvantage, because you didn't... But because you're offering, like, some kind of, like, an incentive that she might go for. Roll just as normal. I'm not actually trying to hit on her. Yeah. I know. Okay. Just so you know... If you didn't... Sam was going to. Now that you have Sam, I'm like, all right, well, fuck. You already did it.

[01:04:37] I mean, hell, you're a barbarian. She's probably from... She probably hails from the demon wastes, where you trained and such. That's true. Like, she's probably, like, from, like, the same, like, area that you came from. Or that you were, like, brought up in. So. Because most tieflings are from the demon wastes, because they're usually the offspring of demons in one of the barbarian tribes there. Persuasion? Persuasion. 25.

[01:05:03] Yeah, I'll meet you at the smoking room at the Pescarella in an hour. They have a smoking room? Yeah. Cool. So. Very high establishment. Or high... Oh, wait. Hang on. Very high establishment. In here. Hang on. Actually, hang on. I gotta double check something. Is it actually in... Is the smoking room there? Or in the... I think it's... Yes. The smoking room is the Pescarella. That sounds fantastic. Fantastic. Okay. So, are you guys...

[01:05:32] You have an hour before she shows up. Or, like, she shows up there. So, yeah. Do you guys want to go there directly, or do you guys want to check out the other place first? So, you said the smoking room is at the inn? Yeah. The smoking room is at the inn, and then there's been some signs that you guys have found of a place called the Orc Skull Tavern. Well, Sam would say, um... So, we have hour. Check Tavern first. Yeah, but you do have an hour.

[01:06:01] Before at least his... A little, like, meeting. Before his plans are going on. Yeah. I believe my palate is a little dry. That's why I'm excited again. I'll say, I'll say. I do declare. You're playing your... You're playing your... That is the wrong campaign. Well, I do declare. I suppose my palate is a little dry. I could... With my whistle. Okay. So...

[01:06:31] Yeah, so is that a yes to the Orc Skull, or to the Beskrat? I guess. Because, like, both of them are technically Taverns, but, like, yeah. This town does literally have two Taverns. I figure we have plans at one. We might as well check the other and see if we can hear anything worth hearing. Okay. Also, here. Yeah. Alright. So, within the middle of the town is the Orc Skull. A large wooden building with a tusked, orcish skull haphazardly affixed to the top of the door. Rough laughter and loud talk can be heard from inside. As you enter the...

[01:07:01] this tavern. Inside is a large common room filled with ale, gambling, and a few overturned tables. My kind of place. So... As you watch the dark place, it's going, I'm pretty sure I killed that guy. Yeah, people are pretty... getting pretty rowdy and ruckus. There's another table flips, suddenly, in front of you guys, as a bar wench comes over and, like, starts flipping some of the other tables. And,

[01:07:31] oh, we'll be with you in just a minute, honey. And then, uh, you see some people in, like, some of the corner booths. Um, they seem to be playing cards and such. Uh, and shouting both, like, cheers and also, like, uh, like, booing dismays. Slurs. Uh, yeah, so slurs are tossed. Uh, another table gets, gets flipped as somebody, uh, loses it as some games of chance. Um... It's like the mess all over again. Yeah. Um,

[01:08:00] you hear, uh, a very interesting you hear a voice of, like, from one of the tables, uh, as the talkings and stuff are going on. Um, it doesn't sound like a local dialect, or like an accent. It sounds like an outsider-y kind of accent. Like, maybe something from Sharn or something. It's like, if those fellows over in Tumbo home wanna, wanna take my liquor, they're gonna have to do it on my icy corpse. Um... Yes. The Sharn accent is crystal.

[01:08:31] That is established. Uh, so if you see, uh, if you see, uh, if you see, uh, the person that is that voice is a Christopher Walken-looking, uh, looking... What is this? What is this guy? You're a police. Oh, no! Uh, he is a human... He is a... Yeah, he is a lanky-looking, um, uh, Christopher Walken-faced human. Um, with a pencil, uh,

[01:09:00] pencil, pencil stash and, um, uh, just laughing at a bunch of, like, a bunch of people that are just, like, freak, like, just, like, in dismay that they lost some, lost to some more gambling at his table and such. Um, anybody from, who's familiar with Sharn could roll me a history test. There you go. I don't think I've been to Sharn. Yeah. Oh, no, you hadn't. You were, you were one of you, they pulled you from a, from a gang in Sharn. Remember? What? Yeah, you guys, you guys were both from,

[01:09:30] from the, uh, Right, because we were both from the same place. You were both from the same criminal gang in Sharn. Okay. You might recognize this dude. History? Uh, it'd be history, yeah. Or an intelligence roll. I feel like it hadn't been. Sixteen. I would also say, what do you get? Sixteen. Okay, I would also, roll a second one time just for advantage because you guys are both in the crime. Because I would say like, you guys, as you guys were originally from like a crime gang, you might recognize this dude. You do.

[01:10:03] Okay. You, you both, you both kind of like, it's like, is that, is that Pareto Maruni? The blue dragon? Fuck, that guy fucking got ganked. Like, it's a good deal moment if we look at each other and we're back at him and we're back at each other and we're back at him. Yeah, it's like, you, you recognize him. He's, he's a, he's a gangster from Sharn who, he thought he had died but you'd also heard some rumors that he'd faked his own death and, and gone, and gone, and like,

[01:10:33] gone to places unknown. That was like about six, that was like right near the end of the last war. Okay, so like six years ago, is that our gang or a different gang? Just a different gang. Like not, not, not, not a, a member of the Ural gang. I was going to say, is it a rival gang or just another gang? Just, just another gang. He was just another gangster, like a mobster kind of. So we wouldn't have inherent distrust or aggression. Um, actually, I don't know, you guys want to roll that, make that a, a coincidence check? So like roll a percentile and see, um, yeah, yeah, see if you guys got beef or not with him.

[01:11:03] How do I do that? Well, it's just one, one of you guys can roll. Okay, I'll hear it. Uh, yes, 85. 85? Yeah, he, and then he, and then he died. Um, because, and then, yeah, so. What gang was he with? Well, I can't remember what your gang, the gang you guys was from. Was it, uh,

[01:11:33] it was the halfling gang, right? I think it was the Boromar. It was the Boromir clan. Yes, the Boromir clan. That's what I got. Yeah. Yeah, you guys were probably Boromar clan, which is like the halfling gang in, that runs most of, that's part of the reason why we had, uh, names that were Lord of the Rings themed. Yeah. Um, so yeah, that's why, yeah, so you, uh, you recognize, like he was a guy that was paying dues for your gang, at your gang for like protection or for like, being, working in your territories and stuff. And then he died and, um,

[01:12:03] yeah, he's here apparently up in the north. So what was his name again? Uh, Perito Maruni. The Blue Dragon. Yeah. Blue, Blue Dragon to his enemies. But that's basically like his, his street name. Hey, I think I know you. Aren't you like, Scooby the Blue Ball Dragon? Uh, it was, he's like, he looks at you, he's like, oh no, before he looks at you, he's like, uh, actually it was

[01:12:32] the Blue Dryyee. Hi! I'm just saying, I'm just saying, Sam looking over the table. It's like, I, I, I, no, it was the, uh, it was the Red Wivum. Totally different thing. Hmm. I see rumors of your demise have been greatly exaggerated. Uh, Barbara! Some, some drinks for my, uh, my,

[01:13:02] my friends here! Yeah! On the house! Good. I almost make up for the 25 gold you spent on drinks at the last place. It's fine, it's fine. Dude! Barbarian, intelligence, not strong suit. Yeah. Okay, it's not my strong suit. I hit things and pay people. It's what I do. Right, you have a good intelligence. Or do I hit people and pay things? I don't know. I hit shit and throw gold around. I don't know. Uh, yeah,

[01:13:31] so after like, you guys like, yeah, somebody comes with your drinks and such. Um, and uh, he like, he's like, clears the table or whatever. So, um, so, Borma's in, up in the, near the Frostfells. Are they? Wherever, we're, we're wherever we need to be, brother. Oh, I see. Um, roll a, uh, roll a deception because you're not here on Borma Business.

[01:14:01] Nope. Specifically seeing you uncomfortable, Sam would offer him a cheers. However, I would like to point out that we are wherever we need to be. And that is what I said. It's still a deception. Uh, actually, I'll give you a dead ban extra one because he's also like, there and like, busy intimidation factors. I mean, literally, it doesn't really matter because I don't have, uh, I'm not proficient in either of them. Okay. But, that's an 18. Okay. Um, I would, uh,

[01:14:32] be really, really grateful if you didn't, uh, notify your, your benefactors that, uh, I was here. My benefactors never need to know, man. Sam just looks at his drink and looks back at him. I'm not right. His benefactors, hold on. The benefactors don't need to know. We, however, we have a, a great need to know. Uh,

[01:15:01] what do you want to know? Your French on 30s fucking Boston. Yeah, I'm going, I'm trying to do that with, or like a New Yorker or, or Boston. It's contagious. Terrible. Yeah, Oh, it was, it was, we were running a, we were running a, um, secret world legend, uh, secret world game, uh, the other, the other week. And he, he was going into like a southern drawl. And I was, and I'm trying to play an Irish, like new feed voice. And I was completely just swatching into like, ah, say, well, gotta do this thing. Like, in my defense,

[01:15:32] I was holding that accent consistently. It's just the French I can't keep going. Yeah. Cause I hate them. You know, I do mildly admire the Russians. I just cannot keep the accent consistent. I hate the French government. But their people, whoa, they are bloody minded bastards. I like, they do like getting the, uh, the guillotine. I respect that. Yeah. Yeah. Um, so, uh, yeah, you're, uh, yeah, so he, he's giving,

[01:16:01] he's calling for more drinks and, uh, you're in, yeah, so it's like, we're leaving close and I go to him. So what, uh, what are these people doing to the lake? I, I don't know. Um, from what I've been hearing down, uh, the, uh, where, we, uh, the, we, the local gossip is that, uh, um, the, uh, the damn bastards over at the Tomberholm, uh, are the ones that are poisoning the lake or cursing the lake and, uh,

[01:16:31] they're out for blood, for our blood. Sam just starts shaking his head, shaking his head back and forth, just, you know. well, you got something, some, you got some news on that? On the situation? Maybe. Okay. He's not gonna say shit, he doesn't have to. Fair. He's in the power position. Yeah, not true. Um, I mean, you have not heard anything about, uh, aggressive movements from this tribe. I'm just trying

[01:17:01] to leverage you don't know what I know. Uh, there's, uh, well, I mean, again, the word here is that, uh, Tomberholm did some kind of, something to the lake to, uh, kill all the fish. But, uh, you know, there's, uh, there's a lady, uh, she, she, she doesn't frequent my, uh, my humble abodes here. Uh, she's, she, I think she's over at the, uh, the, the Pest Rang Inn. She's, uh, she's a storyteller. She has a, she seems to have a different,

[01:17:31] from what I've heard. she hasn't been much. She doesn't come out this way. But she's, uh, the word is that she has a, uh, different theory as to what's going on with the, uh, the lake. Something, some kind of old legend or something. What was that? It wasn't me. I'm, I'm sorry, man. I just, uh, I kept that. I'm nervous. That's the sound

[01:18:00] I'm fully charged. Yeah. I guess the Pest Rang Inn did you take his ass and when he gets to the fart that this is something that makes it. And it smells like freshly cut breasts. Yeah. Um, but yeah, um, I mean, yeah, everybody here is like, we're, we're all under the impression that we're going to end to have some kind of a big brawl or something. Uh, when the, I was almost going French as myself. God damn it. Oh, oh.

[01:18:31] Try to get the access. So you see, uh, Christopher Walken. I gotta, I gotta say that to like get into it again. Christopher. Christopher Walken. Um, no. I don't want to. I don't want to. My favorite Christopher Walken moment. I don't want to. Um, I still love, it's like, I'm sorry. This is not over. Baz.

[01:19:00] Um, but yeah, so, um, yeah, what, what on the street here is that, uh, Tombow Home is itching for a fight and they're just looking for, they've created this whole hullabaloo for, uh, to, uh, to make an excuse. No way, man. I don't see it. All right. Well, yeah, outside of that, um, like I said, I've heard this, this storyteller, I think she's some, uh, some kind of elf, um, over at the, uh, uh, over at the inn that's,

[01:19:30] been telling stories of some ancient legend, but, uh, that's all I know. I guess we'll have to talk to her too, but like, I've got a date. Yeah, I gotta stay here. Like half an hour. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I think the lies, we should, uh, finish these drinks and go over to see your new friend, no? Oui, oui. Before finishing his drinks, Sam would just lean over

[01:19:58] and mention to, uh, our friend. Burrito, yeah. We want to hear that. Yes, and, uh, by the way, um, and like, he like snaps his fingers and like, uh, a bar wench comes over with a, with a tray, but not with the drinks, but with a small pouch. Um, this is, uh, just a complimentary, uh, thing from one of our wagers, our many wagers. Uh,

[01:20:28] any hands it to you? I'm going to the friend. Any hands it to you? It's like, it's got about like 50 gold in it. Uh, Sam would just nod, smile and say, danke. If anybody asks, the last time I saw you, you were dead, man. Yeah. And Sam goes, that's how that goes. Blue dragon? Who? No, I don't know. Blue dragon. Blue ball dragon. Blue waffle dragon. He would be pissed.

[01:20:58] I had like somebody like smirching his, his name. If he wasn't a worry that you guys are like, if he was just stuck in the corner of the booth anyways. Yeah. And he wasn't worried that you guys are actually like here on Boromar business. Yeah. And like, no, no, no, it was nice to miss you, Mr. Blue Angel. Yeah, yeah, you too. All right, all right. Well, I guess we'll go, uh, we'll go find a table over in the, uh,

[01:21:28] the smoking room. So you had to go to the other end. Yes. Okay. Okay. So you guys wander out of the skull, the orc skull, back into the cold, uh, kind of, it sobers you up for a moment. Cool. Yeah, because it is getting pretty cold. At this point, it's getting pretty dark. Um, and, uh, you eventually make your way down closer to the dock section of this town. I believe it might get yourself off. And, uh, I wear a car all the time. Uh,

[01:21:58] near the palisades closest to Pesquale Lake sits Pesquale Inn, a notably sized log building with a trout carved into its wooden door. As you step inside, an aroma of delicious cooked fish fills your nose. You see a relatively small common room containing a few townsfolk eating meals. Behind the counter within is a gnomish innkeeper.

[01:22:24] Adjacent to the common room is a smoking room featuring fine furniture. I thought the fish were all poison. Where did they get the fish from? I think they got this fish from the, uh, the forest. No. Or from, they have like, they have like store, like, like stores of it still. Like, this is like the remaining store stuff. Yeah. Um, oh, you were talking about the actual fish smell. I think it was the fish carving. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[01:22:55] Yeah. Um, but yeah, so it seems like, yeah, this, this, uh, yeah, this place is definitely a lot more like the clientele here a lot more for like the, the wealthier, well-to-do people of, of town. Um, and, uh, I'll see, what do you guys have for passive perceptions? 14, 12, 14, 12, and 18, 18. All right. Um, Jesus. My wisdom is 20. Um,

[01:23:25] so you guys hear kind of like a clamoring of different voices, um, kind of in the, uh, the main, or the small common room eating balls and talking, and then also some, uh, some voices from the, uh, the, uh, the smoking room. Some of them is like, some, some human is, uh, like is eating and, uh, and talking, but it's like, I've met, I've met boring rock fist. There's no way he would curse Pescare Lake and let the town starve just for some petty game. And then, um,

[01:23:53] that's kind of what you guys are hearing inside the main room, aside from like, uh, people asking the, the gnomish, uh, bartender for drinks and such. Um, but you notice there, uh, legalized, uh, in, uh, coming from the, uh, coming from the, the smoking room. Um, there, uh, you hear a woman's, uh, a woman talking saying, it's like, heed my words. This is the work of the Wintervich. I have no doubt of that.

[01:24:23] I have read, I have read through many tales and see, and I've been, that is why I've come to these lands in search of lore and ancient lore of my, of the elves and, and of the fey wilds. Mark me words. Somewhere up in those, in those hills, up in those mountain, up on that mountain, there is a darkness. And that is the source of this, this accursed predicament. Uh, that's what you kind of hear from the, um, from the smoking room. Uh,

[01:24:52] and then about a few moments after that, um, the door opens behind you guys. Uh, and, you get tugged. Oh, it was like, so where, what's that? Where's that, uh, where's that green leaf? Hell yeah. As the two flings behind us, let's go Blaze. Alright, let's go. Okay. Alright. Just drags you. My kind of woman. I shall hopefully light the, uh, the splits. Sure. With my magic.

[01:25:23] Okay. Yeah. You do so. As you guys are sitting in the, appreciated. I mean, Sam has his own stache, so. Bear? I stole from you, used it to entice you. I never said I gave you it. That's fine. I grow my own, man. Exactly. I just couldn't miss the polar bear. Once you're back to yourself, you have your own. Uh, let's see. Plant growth. Spells channels of vitality into plants in a specific area. There are two possible uses,

[01:25:53] granting the immediate and long-term benefits. So, if I have, you know, a bunch of seeds, and I cast this within a hundred foot radius centered on that point, all plants become thick and overgrown. I can make instant marijuana. You just, instant, you're basically a, a walking, um, I'm grow up. Farm scene. Yeah, you're a walking, a walking grow up.

[01:26:21] Pulls a little pot of seed in there under his fucking jacket. Bam! Yeah. Made my monster grow! I mean, it might be the best solution for getting everybody on the best terms together again. Just supplying them all with like a hundred square meters. I guess, I guess the question is who else is partaking, who's partaking aside from the tiefling Bella and, because Bella's also there again. She's been there this whole time, but she's been like kind of quiet. Um, you're not?

[01:26:51] I am not smoking the kind of best. Okay. So you're just smoking, regular smoking tobacco, or are you going to go up to the, the, uh, the gnomish bartender and stuff for that? Or, I will get some nice fish soup and I will smoke us some of the tobacco. Okay. Nice cigar. Okay. So we'll get to you in a second. Okay. So yeah, you, you, um, uh, Richard, you walk up to the, uh, up to the, the dad, the counter, uh, and, uh, you hear, the, the gnomish woman,

[01:27:20] she's talking to some other person that she's like, like as they're, as they're approaching and she's like, poor, poor Carmack or cool Mark. Um, ever since his daddy's death, the woman, that woman of Mira has got him, got him wrapped around her finger in every which way. Oh, hi. My name's, uh, my name's, uh, Faina. I'm the proprietor of this, uh, this is a stat, this fine establishment. What can I help you with? I would like a nice bowl of your soup.

[01:27:48] I would like a nice cigar to smoke. And I would like to know who this woman is you were talking about. Oh, ha, ha, uh, yeah, the other guy controls off. It's like, uh, yeah, I can get you some soup. And I, it's, um, only about two copper for, uh, for some, uh, for some of our, for about an hour's worth of smoking tobacco. I pull out two gold and I push it across the counter. And I would like to know who's that woman is you are talking about. Uh, lady of Mira, is she like, I like,

[01:28:17] she's actually on like a stool herself, like standing on a stool. And it's like, uh, and she like, kind of like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Little of me, lady of Mira is, uh, uh, is, is, is mayor Comac's mother. Uh, but word, word on the street is that, um, she, uh, she's always had a, she's always wanted, uh, the power, but like the, the town's always had like a, uh, a male mayor. So, there's been word that maybe like she, ever since,

[01:28:45] ever since the late mayor passed away and his, his son took over, all of the decisions that he's been making has really just been his mother's orders. He's more just like a, a front, like a, like a pup. uh, uh, how would I know his mother if I met her? Uh, very stern looking woman. Um, a guill, uh, uh, hawkish nose, black, straight black hair,

[01:29:14] very sharp cunning eyes. you actually did, Becky kind of saw her on your, when you were like walking over to the crowd that was going on. She was behind, um, uh, Colmack while he was on the, uh, the, on the, uh, on the cart talking about the, the profanities against Tomberham earlier. She went inside the, uh, the log house right before like they, she, uh, Colmack stepped down and went into the log house himself. Interesting.

[01:29:43] Merci beaucoup mademoiselle. I shall go and I shall enjoy this. All right. Thank you. Thank you for your patronage. All right. So you two are, or, or, or, so you're smoking. Are you smoking his marijuana or his, or are you smoking your own green leaf? I'm smoking my own. Yeah. Okay. He's smoking, my stolen green leaf. Roll constitution, or roll your constitution save. So do I get to do it at an advantage? I obviously do this all the time.

[01:30:17] Uh, so constitution save would be, 10. Okay. 10. Okay. Um, well, you're honestly not too far off from, uh, from Bella because Bella is also like, uh, like she's not too, like too green under the gills, but she's definitely like, she's feeling it, but not messed up. Yeah. And neither are 20. Roll the 20. Yeah, you're fine. And yeah, you're, you're also, this is like my jam. Yeah. And the tiefling, actually, I used to roll for the tiefling as well. Oh yeah. She's,

[01:30:47] she's smoking about as much as you are. Like she's actually keeping up with you, their, uh, green leaf. That's kind of woman. Hell yeah. It's like, yeah, I guess it's pretty good stuff. I grow up myself. Yeah. I have a whole farm of it. Really? Sam leans over and goes, doesn't share though. Hmm. What are you smoking right now, bud? I stole it. And as a bear, you think I couldn't smell it? Duh. But where are you guys from anyway? You know,

[01:31:16] clearly not from the frost bells or anywhere near us. Throw everything off the table without the map. Throw it on the table. the tape, you were also just using that table to start with your, like stash of tobacco when they whipped everything off. Not they. I'm going to point it. Not they. Sam had nothing to do with that. Sam was sitting there and the table was empty. And it was a map. Sacre bleu. Colas. Sam,

[01:31:46] Sam, Sam, I'm a man. Man. So have you heard of a shot? No, I haven't really been down south. What's this test? Asphalt? Just on the edge of beautiful Lake Sear. Right next to the dead mists of the morning. Well, yes, but also still on the beautiful Lake Sear. The one, the lake that's in,

[01:32:15] supposedly infested with Lake Monsters from the Mornlands. I haven't seen anything in that. This, I'm going for exaggeration. There are some big fish. I mean, I grew up in the, in the demon waste, in the demon waste. Honestly, the most of the problem that we've seen in a shot has been fucking warforged, man. Yeah, but the Lord of Blades isn't really much of a problem. Not anymore. What happened? Wait, why is he not,

[01:32:45] what's the news? There's some, the Lord of Blades. I can't really say because we didn't finish that. No, but last you saw, like you guys, like I'm going to say this is taking place. Like you guys left like a day after that situation. Yes, but I don't know how it ended because we haven't played through it. Sure. Well, I was just as like, basically like there, like he was, it seemed like the Lord of Blades like showed up beaten by something. And now there's a refugee camp of Lord of Blades followers outside of the town. Pansy got his ass kicked.

[01:33:15] He had to come crawling to us for protection. What the hell did he get? What the hell did he get? Apparently the Demogorgon bent him over. Wait, the Demogorgon, the Demogorgon's like on Corvair? Ah, don't worry about this. It's the 18 will take care of it. Yeah. Shot's pretty, pretty awesome. At this point, actually also, as, as like, she's like kind of considered this stuff. Azara,

[01:33:44] the elf storyteller that was like talking earlier. She comes up. It's like, tell me, tell me more about this news. I could use this for some more story material. Hi, my name's Azara Ravenmount. Right. But first you can tell us a story before we tell you one. I, I suppose that's only fair. What, what kind of stories would you, would you like to know about the, uh, the, the local folklore that I've discovered on this, while, while visiting this, this region? I feel that you have a theory about, uh,

[01:34:13] the lack of fish in the lake. Ah, I do indeed. Indeed. See, everybody's blaming everybody here. Like, the, I've heard, I've heard some, some stories over in Tomberholm that they're blaming Kulkutch, and Kulkutch obviously is going to blame Tomberholm. It's only natural. They're both, have tension for, for the last several hundred years, uh, specifically when Kulkutch was founded and such. After, the, the mayor's great, great grandfather took out an entire orc camp, and,

[01:34:43] and basically just set up a town on the, on the, on the blood splattered battleground of it. But, uh, yeah, no, it's not, it's, I, I don't think it's, I don't think it's either town. I think there's something, there have been stories, people will say, if you, if you, if you think, if you, uh, listen long enough, that there's something up on the top of the mountain. And from what I've gathered in my folklore and legends and stuff like that, uh, I think it's the, there's this legend of the winter witch. See, back about five,

[01:35:13] 300 years, about, about 500 years ago, when the dwarves were here, uh, first settled here, um, they were mining out the, uh, the top, the tunnels, they were mining out a network of tunnels underneath the mountain, and such before it all went to, uh, it all went dry about a hundred years back. And during that time, there were two warring, there were two rival clans of dwarves. And this, this witch, this creature from potentially the fey wilds or the underdark or something,

[01:35:41] showed up and stole equipment from them or from one of, from one of the groups. And so the two clans thought the other was stealing their stuff and they, went to war. And after the one clan killed, slaughtered the other one, the winter, which showed up, deposited their, their equipment on them and said that she had taken the equipment and then flew off on a great staff, on a great staff laughing as the, as the,

[01:36:11] as the dwarves, uh, regret, as the dwarves like stood there in their regret for the bloodbath that they'd caused on their brothers and sisters. So, so I think this whole situation is probably tied to that, maybe that winter, which is still up there at the top of the mountain, causing some kind of a, maybe she's cursed the, the lake to try and get these two towns to, to, uh, to fight. Now, no one will, no one's really paying, been paying,

[01:36:41] like no one's really paid my, uh, these folktales credit, despite my best performances. But, um, I mean, there is a reason the local townsfolk don't go too close to the, those, uh, those forests around the mountain. Those, the animals there, they act a little different. They act a lot more ravenous and rabid. And they're, yes? Insight check. Yep. on, on, on, on, on, on, on Bella Twila? Yeah. I mean, on Bella Twila?

[01:37:11] Mm-hmm. Yeah. Because, uh, this sounds kind of like her patron. Yeah, true. It's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like,

[01:37:39] it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, something has clicked in her mind as she's, as she's been listening to the story. Okay. Okay. I'm not going to, uh, bring it up in front of everybody. Okay. Because there could be, you know, good reason for it. Okay. Yeah. So, yeah, that's what you,

[01:38:08] you guys are having like a ball, like you're, it's like, it's a good buzz. Yep. Like, good. Hi. You're so weird. Join us here. You, you had to go, you like, like you walked over to the gnome, told her like what happens. Oh yeah, here, I'll, I'll copy. Here's some more tobacco. So, what, uh, what do you think this winter witch is? Legends are kind of varied right now. it could be a, uh, could be a night hag, uh, could be a, could just be some kind of,

[01:38:36] some ancient elven witch or dwarven shaman that's, uh, or a lich. Uh, the stories are pretty varied on what it is. Um, best I've been able to pinpoint is it might be closer to like a night hag of some kind or, or one of the hags. I have, uh, experience with these, you know, have you? I divorced one. Everyone laughs. Everyone starts laughing.

[01:39:07] It's, it's a, it's a very, it's a, it's a good old time. Got it. All right, well, I'm going to continue trying to, uh, talk up the, uh, the glory that is, um, a shot. Okay. Yeah. Do the tiefling. Yep. Roll persuasion. Are you trying to like, hang on, are you trying to, she seems fucking bored where she is? Yeah. So, yes. If she's bored of where she is, then, oh,

[01:39:36] she's absolutely bored. Mostly because if she is a barbarian, what kind of barbarian just leans against the fucking wall? But she's not a barbarian, she's just a tiefling, so. Well, no, what I'm saying is, based on overall demeanor. Yeah. And she's kind of like me, why do you mean against the wall? You want to hit things. Yeah, true. If you don't want to hit things, it's because you're bored of hitting the things that are around you. I'll give you an advantage, because, like, back, back,

[01:40:05] green leaf is pretty good. Okay. I was going to say, she seems to be enjoying herself. Yeah. That's all I got to say. Also because I noticed that that was like a two-year-old. It's still going to 15. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I thought it had rolled a 15. No, it's still very saturation. Yeah. You know, I'm assuming you have way better persuasion than I do. No, because mine's like, I have an ax. Yeah. I mean, it's better than yours.

[01:40:35] That's better. Now I actually rolled the 15. So that's a total of 18. Yeah. So you're, you're going on about like, Oh, like how awesome a shot is. It's like, she said, I was like, well, and you, and, uh, this place also has like your, um, your, your little operation. Mm. Yeah. I think, I think I could be looking for some new employment. I could see myself getting out of,

[01:41:04] getting the hell out of this frozen piss bowl. Um, well, you know, if you decide in the next couple of days, you want to go, I know when airship that's going that way. It's over going, it's going over to Tumberholm, isn't it? Well, yeah. Okay. Yeah. I guess I can make the trek out that way. All right. Yeah. If you're, uh, you're, if your, your, your product is, uh, is, is in a shot. Is that, that's where it's saying? And you need a,

[01:41:31] if you need a guard to watch over your grow up. Um, yeah, that's what I'm looking for. Uh, she just kind of like, gives like a nice, like warm smirk and just like, kind of like hold, like holds up the, especially warm. Cause she's a tiefling and she's now wreathed in flames. Yeah. Yeah. I was going to say based off the female tiefling that's in. Carlack. Baldur's gate. No. I know exactly what I'm picturing. Yeah.

[01:42:00] It's not too far off. Like maybe not. As soon as you said female tiefling, that's the first thing. She's not like, and that's the thing that I'm keeping. Her heart wasn't replaced with. No infernal engine. But like, it's still like that kind of like horns. Yeah. Pink, like a, uh, probably like a reddish purple skin, but, yeah. Yeah. She was, and outside, like she doesn't seem too perturbed by the cold because. Tell me if tieflings are my favorite without telling me tieflings are my favorite. I am so waiting.

[01:42:30] Like I'm so ready for when Baldur's Gate 3 finally goes to Xbox. It's supposed to be, they keep saying the end of 2023. We're getting closer and closer to the end of 2023 guys. And they haven't even given us a release date yet. I've been loving it on PC. I got to say, I have not completed the game, but I'm on like my fourth character. Yeah. I'm playing the dirge right now. It's so fun. Nice. Um, but yeah. So, uh, yeah, she, you, congrats. You, uh, you have definitely, uh,

[01:43:00] persuaded her to maybe seek new employment. Fantastic. Fantastic. I will just add. It's the wrong character. Yep. But close. Uh, what is her name? Her name is Turva Scorn. Useful is useful. Okay. Issues that trace, new employment by the hour. Future. Why do you, uh, is it sad that like, I kind of like, Turva Scorn. Turva Greenleaf.

[01:43:32] Is it sad also that like, I'm thinking it's like, I actually kind of would like love to see that story. Like a, a, a like half baked, like half, or half baked elf hooking up with like a, like misanthropic tiefling who just like really loves his, uh, uh, his, uh, and also eventually him. But, well, I could never do that. How the fuck do you make that work? What? Growing shit. As a tiefling,

[01:44:01] we're pretty good at burning or destroying. Growing. Yeah. There's a spell for that. There's an app for that. I'm sure there is. Okay. So, uh, yeah. Um, so you, that's sort of the information you guys gather. Um, it seems like neither town knows exactly who's like, he's, both towns are accusing the other town of it.

[01:44:27] And there's this legend of some kind of old woman or like a night hag of some kind up on the mountaintop that, uh, that has in, at least in the folklore and some of that has caused curses and like caused these kind of tensions before. So, it's very possible that that's either where you guys need to go or what you need to tell, um, the, uh, the head of the, of the, the, of the next, of the new, of the, the head of Tomberholm, um,

[01:44:56] who will probably then ask you guys to go up there and deal with it. Where is this mountain? Is it between the two towns? Oh yeah. You, you saw it on the way, you, you, uh, like you can see from, from, uh, outside. Uh, it's the big mountain that overshadows, or that, that, past the shadow over the, over the lake. Uh, I guess we stopped being on the way back past. Uh, it is about a three day trek up the mount, uh, up the mountain. Three day by foot? Three day by horse. Uh,

[01:45:25] well actually it's three days to the mountain and then it's about two days hike up the mountain. What if I'm an elk? Uh, you, she's like, like, like, um, I suppose you could cut down the time if you were something faster. Cause I mean, I could in theory ride on like his neck. Yeah. And then I could ride in like the normal saddle position. Yeah. Oh,

[01:45:54] what you guys do have to understand is that the elk that I would be taking, the form of the elk that I would be taking is not a large creature. It is in fact a huge creature. Yeah. You guys could have a dance club on my back. I never said I was asking. Well, I will say the, um, the, the path up the mountain, like there was no trails going up to the mountain. Um, so it would be, um, hard, like, like there'd be, it'd be rough terrain. Which is why I wasn't asking. Yeah. I've never seen an elk use a trail. True. Um,

[01:46:23] that's why I'm saying the, the three days to the mountain would probably be cut into like one and a half. One. Uh, yeah, one, one day. But then the, the, going up like the perilous, like narrow path, like trails up the mountain would probably be the full two, two days. I mean, it's not that same time. Can you turn into a mountain goat? Can you turn into a mountain goat? I can. Then I guess it would cut that into you. Like even further.

[01:46:53] Unfortunately, as a goat, I cannot carry them. Yeah. So, yeah, I think, I think I could turn into a giant goat, which, which would mean that I could carry one of them. I mean, I'm only half a person. And, and also if, if, um, uh, if Bella removes her, uh, removes her, her horse from the cart and just rides it, like rides it like to the, to the mountain, she can probably keep pace with your elk because it's a Valinar steed. Well, and only carrying one. One person. Only carrying,

[01:47:22] it's only carrying one person and it's following the trail I've already cleared. Yeah. Yeah. So we definitely keep up with you, but, but then once you guys get up to the actual mountain, like the, the, the horse is going to be useless. I was just saying at that point, it's going to slow down regardless of what we do. Yeah. Okay. I mean, a mountain's a mountain's a mountain. So Bella actually says like, well, should I maybe go back to the other town ahead of you? Do you guys want to go there, do the mountain thing? And I'll go back to the, and tell, tell the, uh, the mayor what, what's going on?

[01:47:51] Or do you want me to maybe send my horse and the cart back there? Cause he's, Kelly's a pretty smart horse. He can get back to the stables there by himself. Okay. I'm not known for being smart. So I'm just going to look at the other two. Why don't you just take your horse and go back and you tell the mayor that we are going up to the top of the mountain to kill a hag. And, uh, we'll be back when the first is lifted. Uh, okay. Yeah.

[01:48:20] You guys don't need my help for this. We do not need your help. Your gold would be appreciated. Okay. Well, um, I'm sure. sure my patron will appreciate your endeavors. I will make sure that she knows that you guys are like, we're influential in our instrumental in this, uh, in this situation. So, um, are you going to, but before she heads out though, um, are you going to try and get a whole,

[01:48:49] like talk to her, like away from the rest of the people? Like you, uh, green, uh, you, uh, Aaron, you said like you want green, yeah, green leaf was like, saw that she was like, she had an idea. yes. Yeah. So when she's, she goes outside to go basically grab her cart and start heading out. And so you like follow her outside. So I can't help but notice that like, when she was describing,

[01:49:18] it wasn't like, sounded an awful lot. like maybe the queen of air and darkness. Wow. That is so racist. You dick. No, it's like more like, wow. Do not let her know. So you say, uh, let her know that you say that I will, I will, I will keep that. Oh gosh. Actually, something that she said, something that the storyteller said kind of made me click into what, what part of the message I got from Mab.

[01:49:48] Um, she wanted me to come down here and deal with some, she said someone. So I think maybe someone, I think some, some creep, some being or something that maybe pissed her off. And so she wanted me and some people to go and come down here and basically deal with her. Cause it was too much of a trouble for Mab to deal with herself. Okay. I mean, fair enough, I guess.

[01:50:16] Which is why I did offer like to come and help you guys. But if you guys think you can ascend a mountain and deal with a creature potentially of the, of the Feywilds, we got this. I have three fireball. Top that bitch. Two days later. It's just, after there's like a couple of explosions and then an avalanche. It's just three bottles of fireball. That's all. Yeah.

[01:50:46] It's just, it's just, same thing. When you are French Canadian, that's where, that is where fireball comes from. It is. Yeah. Fireball is actually a product of Quebec. It is. Yeah. Surprise, it's not called the testicle de fou. What? Solange is essentially maple fireball. Imagine a fireball except maple syrup. Same with you. Is it alcoholic? It's extremely. Dude, it's from Quebec. Maple fireball. If it's, I,

[01:51:15] I don't know if it's supposed to be the cinnamon and the maple or the maple and the, and the alcohol, or if it's the alcohol, maple and fireball. Imagine slightly. I think I've actually had solange. Cause like, imagine slightly thicker whiskey. Yeah. It's like maple. Yeah. We have them at shots giving and it's, that's solange. Yeah. My, my cousins bring that specifically to shots giving. It's like, you sound like giving. I did. I think it's like, my family doesn't celebrate Thanksgiving. Something like that. But because of the short content, it is slightly thicker than liquor.

[01:51:45] It is strange. I love it. Next time you're coming this way, you want to hook brother up? Pretty sure. I will totally buy a lot. Okay. Cause I never go to Quebec. I am going to go to Quebec one time left in my life. And that's when I'm traveling through it to go to New Brunswick. See, I'll talk to her later. Yeah. We'll talk to her later. So yeah. Yeah. So she, so you still want her to go and tell the mayor, like the, the evidence you guys have found. Yeah.

[01:52:14] The boys think we got this. I'm sure we got this. It's cool. Okay. Okay. Um, yeah. Since it's probably my backstory. I know my favorite enemy. Hag. Yes. Did you add? Well, you know, cause what's funny is hags are actually a denizen of the monster nation. So you could have actually, actually married a fucking hag. A nightmare. Backstory. Found fighting monsters.

[01:52:45] You have. If a hag is a monster. I mean, that's how you. Technically. Leah. Where did Richard cheese come from? Like where, where, who, how was he recruited? I can't remember. I can't remember who, who recruited him and where. Oh, was that also in charm? Like with YouTube? I feel like maybe. Yeah. I think, I feel like, cause you guys did a lot of recruiting in charm. We did. Early on. We were all just doing no shit. We were like, Hey, I can use you. We were like, literally, they, literally you guys, they, they, they went to charm.

[01:53:14] They had some meddling with, or they wanted to like get a land cart, like for the town. And so they went through underground illegal channels, i.e. the Boromar clan. And you guys were part of the Boromar clan helping them. And they were like, Hey guys, you want to just like, like drop everything you're doing in charm and come to a shot. It's going to be way bigger than charm in a couple of years anyway. And they, they convinced you guys to like move. Now you live rurally. Now you live in a slowly developing town. So I live in Russia.

[01:53:45] Yeah. Anyway, um, a shot of Stan. A shot of Stan. God damn it. anyways, anyways, so, um, yeah, so she, she heads off, uh, with her, with her cart and her, her horse, um, out of Kulketch to head to Tomber home. I'll be skeptically. I'll roll a, uh, persuasion to see how well she does at like, at convincing the, the town that, to not go to war while you guys are gone.

[01:54:15] Cool. I'm not going to tell you guys what you guys, what that was. Oh. Oh, if she's trying to do that, then I'm going to provide her with a bag of weed. Okay. To help convince them. We kill the hang. We come back down. Everybody's dead. Okay. Oops. That, uh, we'll see how that goes in, uh, in your absence. So, yeah. So you guys, um, yeah. So, um, are you guys going to go in the morning or like, like busy stay the night here or go in the morning or you guys heading out at night? Wait, do you think the morning that,

[01:54:44] that misty place by seer? Not the morning. The morning. Are you going at dawn? Or evening? Or you're going down? Uh, we'll stay the night because I can only maintain an animal shape for three hours at a time. So I can do that, uh, twice in the morning. I think then we can take a short rest and then I can do it twice more in the evening. So I can do it for like 12 hours. Okay. Um, it takes her, what's her, um, uh, the, uh, the,

[01:55:14] the gnome, uh, Faina, who's at the, uh, who's at the counter, uh, says it's two golden. So, well, one of you hitting on her. No, I was there on the halfway at the other. Yeah. In the other town, you know, where there was halflings and the doors and gnomes here. I'm kind of out of my depth. Like, yeah, I'm the same height as them, but actually they're, they're,

[01:55:42] I can pretend it's like somebody who's five, eight, sitting in the same height as somebody who's six foot. I mean, yes, but no, like sure. We're both human, but no. Okay. So we're both approximately average height. Uh, it just depends on your definition of approximate. So you guys continue to, um, like basically smoke, smoke the gonge and, uh, uh, drink the beers and some, some smoking tobacco into the night as well. Yep. Okay. Yeah.

[01:56:12] I think that's, Sam's got nothing better to do if he's waiting for the morning. It is, uh, two silver per hour for, uh, for any more, um, smoking tobacco. It's fine. I'm just going to put a platinum piece down. Okay. For my, um, for my room, for, well, I brought my own ganja for my beer, for my pipe tobacco. So there is a mad, like, woo, hot party at, in the smoking lounge. Um, there is, uh, yeah, there's just a, a big old, uh, bowling party that night.

[01:56:42] With an arm. I only have 239 platinum pieces now. All of you guys roll constitution, uh, saves for your various drinking and smoking that night. At advantage? Yes, you can get an advantage. 11. Okay. Fucking, I'm trying to remember how to do math. I'm really glad you let me do an advantage. Fucking, well, it doesn't really matter, because the second dice that I rolled was the shitty. 19 plus three. Four. I don't know yet,

[01:57:12] because the good dice doesn't stop spinning. What'd you, what'd you get, sir? 23. Okay, you're, you're fine. You're a halfling barbarian. You drink, you drink these people under the table and you smoke. I'm drinking, I'm like, this is, this is my water. Yeah, basically like, 15. Yeah. Most people are falling asleep by the time you got, like, or, or by the time you're like ready to go to bed. Uh, you got, what, 15? Yeah. Yeah, you're, you're actually starting to get kind of tired, like,

[01:57:41] a little bit later into the evening. Um, and, uh, uh, what's her name? Scorn. Um, to go back to her, her place and grab some, grab her stuff and kind of like basically start making the trek, uh, in the morning she's going to make the trek out to, uh, Tomber home. Get ready to pay him. Yeah. She's like, I'm not even going to fucking tell them because like, I'm just out. Yeah. I'm two weeks notice? Nah, fuck that. Dude, nobody has two weeks. Let's be honest.

[01:58:11] It's also not, it's a myth. Five minutes notice. Yeah. A letter. If you're lucky. A note on her door. It's like, I found better employment. Just peace. I'm out. Yeah. It's like, just peace. Last time I epically quit a job, my boss told me to do something and I said, no, I'm not comfortable doing that. And he said, you're going to do it because I'm the boss. And when I say goes, and I said, well, fuck you then. You ain't my boss. And I threw,

[01:58:39] I took my shirt off because it was a work shirt and I threw it in his face. Then you were shirtless. Then I was shirtless. But I grabbed my backpack on the way out. It had a shirt in it. Yeah. And yet he still won. Yeah. Well, also like, again, like the whole two weeks notice is more of a courtesy thing for you. Like that you're supposed to do. Not. Has no meaning anymore. You will post my job before my obituary. Fuck you. Yeah. Basically. Anyway. Yeah. So that's what she's gone off to do. And you event,

[01:59:09] you're pretty much the last person, like, like the gnome, like favorite, Faina has to like, uh, has to basically like second call or last call you. Like, y'all are boring. Uh, and then you guys all wake up and like come back down and they're still cleaning up the, let's just take this party upstairs. Yeah. Yeah. They're still cleaning up. But when you guys get downstairs for like, uh, for some breakfast and such, which because the platinum was like, Oh, here you go. Here's some, some fresh, uh, fish stew.

[01:59:38] And we're going to have to set out at the crack of noon. Cause the polar bears passed out in front of the door. We can't leave. Yeah. That's yeah. You, you get downstairs and he is, he is a polar bear that's passed out and no one, no, like everyone, there's people like that were dining last night that like couldn't leave. So they just ended up like, no, they just ended up setting up some bed rolls and just like slip through the common room. What?

[02:00:07] I come down. Ah, I feel like the crack of ass. Try one. I have to work. It's fucking delicious. It's cowbell. Oh, wait, cowbell. What? Cowbell. It's a creme brulee nitro stout. Interesting. It needs more cowbell. Cowbell is an Ontario. Cowbell is an Ontario brewery and it's actually pretty good. Yeah. Everything needs more cowbell. This podcast, but you like cowbell. I fucking wish. Fucking sponsor. Also,

[02:00:36] bring back the original absentee landlord. Seriously, the new version is not that great. I missed the way I missed. They did a really good. Yeah, they did. I think it was a wheat beer. I love wheat beers. And it was really good. And we had it down in London, Ontario, but around where the brewery is. Yeah. And then they changed it to a gulch. Yeah. Yeah. It's a gulch. Yeah. And it's like, it's all right, but I could, I could, I can drink cans and cans of the original stuff. Exactly.

[02:01:06] Right? I love wheat. It tastes like a little bit. It's like a creme brulee. Just a little bit. Just a little bit. That's enough. So it's enough. Aaron's like, no. You're going to want it. This is a bit of a taste. Oh, the smell. Like, just like, just the, just the smell. It's like a creme brulee. Right? That is a fucking dessert beer right there. Oh my God. That definitely is. I'm only buying two of those. Is that, did you get an LCBO or?

[02:01:36] Yeah. I am. I'm going to have to get some. Oh yeah, no, that's good. That's good. Like it's so well caramelized. Anyway. Cowbell Brewery, please sponsor us. Please sponsor one less die. Oh yes, you got the other one. Like you just had the other one. Yeah. So, yeah, you guys wake up and have some, some fresh fish stew. They apologize for the, for like the, the lack of like other accoutrements, but we're kind of,

[02:02:05] they're kind of lacking in selection of late. There is what there is. You know, there is still plenty of beer and ale. So for the right price, I happen to know a small town that, uh, that, that grows a lot of vegetables and they have their own airships. So they could probably establish a trade group with you for a fair price. You want to roll a persuasion to try and appreciate a, uh, a, a import export.

[02:02:36] Uh, uh, 14. Um, I feel like it's worth the conversation. I mean, yeah, maybe like give me their information and I'll see if I can get a scryer to like, get a letter out to them. All right. Everything's off the table. You just got, sat down for your beer and stew and they all get, it's like,

[02:03:06] I feel like, I feel like Sam sat a stew down, was taking a sip of his beer and a stew is gone. He's like, well, I still don't want beer, I guess. And then that's when he just like, no, throws, smacks it out of my hand. Yeah. He showed you, you should, you do the whole spiel. Now it's like, yeah, it's like, let's pretty. So yeah, I'll send, I'll send a letter. I think. Yeah. I'll, I'll have to send a letter out that way or, or find a scryer or something.

[02:03:34] But like that seems awfully far away, but I guess, yeah, I guess so. Maybe airships. Yeah. Yeah. How do they work? Yeah. So like you've opened the possibility. Not that it's actually, may not actually happen. What? You can't do any portal magic yet. That you know of. Correct. Because I played a wizard a lot of times.

[02:04:03] Dimension door is a fourth level spell and that's only 500. yards. What? Because it's true. Okay. And only soldiers will understand. Okay. So yeah, you guys, yeah, you made that, that call. And eventually you wake, or you already woke up because you're, you, you doing this whole thing. So yeah, eventually you guys finish up your meals and like you're, you've had a okay rest. We convinced the whole man to get out of the way. Yeah.

[02:04:32] Um, so you guys start heading out of, uh, uh, out of Kulkach and, uh, heading toward the, uh, the mountain. So as you're, as you're heading toward Mount Frosner, which is the name of the mountain. I kept forgetting the name, but yeah, it's called Mount Frosner. Um, so you're transforming into an elk, a giant elk, giant elk. Okay. So now you're the only, uh, you're the only Mount because, uh, Bella left with her horse and such. So, um,

[02:05:01] so you'll be mounted the whole party. Yeah. There's like two. Yeah. So the, Oh, I guess it's a halfling. It is a halfling and a, an elf. So it's not that bad. I'm basically just sitting between the elders waiting. But yeah, what, I can't remember what race is, uh, is Richard. It's a high elf. High elf. Okay. And in this shape, my dick weighs more than he does. So there's mine. What are you talking about? Okay. I mean, I guess it's good time to mention he's holding like a horse stone. That's true.

[02:05:31] Okay. So as you're approaching the, uh, or you're heading through the wilderness, uh, cause shortly after you like leave the, uh, the snowy trails and so that between the, like near the lake and stuff, you start entering these like deep gray trees and like, uh, leafless trees and also, um, pine forest and such. Um, before the actual mountain itself. So I need somebody to roll me a D eight as, uh, but halfway through your journey, there's an encounter. One. Okay. Waka waka.

[02:06:01] Waka waka waka waka waka waka waka. It was the party guide. Uh, you and cat. So, uh, you stop dead, uh, or you, uh, you get a weird feeling, um, uh, up ahead and, uh, you short, you, you stop short, uh, you stop just short of a, a small clearing in the, in the, in among the pines and cedars, uh,

[02:06:30] uh, eyes. They're just little guys. Then they begin to charge. How close together are they? Uh, they're about like five feet apart from each other. So four of them, five feet spacing. That is four of them in 20 feet. Yes. Okay. Fireball. That was what I was saying. I think I remember this story. Yeah. Well, let's roll initiative to see if you can get that off first. So initiative, everybody, to see if you can get off. That's a c20, right? Yeah.

[02:07:00] I'm 34. Maybe so. 23. Um, you got, uh, 23. Green got 23. What'd you get? It makes sense for somebody, lounging in somebody else's antlers. Three. Okay.

[02:07:28] I was just lounging between your antlers waiting and all of a sudden we're in a fight and I'm like, that's going to be a bad place for you in a minute. As if I hadn't already realized that. That's why I looked at the dice and went, oh, this is not good for me. Okay. Um, because I know where I am and I know what I'm doing. All right. You're, you're casting your, uh, your tech. Fireball. Fireball. Fireball. I need five more details. Time to cook you up. I have one. No, no. These ones. Because they are fireballs.

[02:07:58] I have a single red D6. It's the only D6 I have. It's a number that's higher than 12. 6, 12, 18, 24, 30. Did you count that extra three? Yeah. Okay. How big is that, uh, that radius? 24, 40 feet across total. Yeah. So you no longer have, uh, four elk charging at you guys.

[02:08:28] You now have four, uh, cooked, or four elk barbecues. In other words, it worked exactly like you hoped it would. So yeah, but they had like, yeah, you, as a druid, like, uh, rolling nature, uh, right before they died. To tell something right before. Right before they went up and... Yeah, right before they fooshed. The foosh. Everybody's experienced something at once. This is what we like to call a Valinar barbecue.

[02:08:58] A dirty 20. A dirty 20? Yeah, so their eyes were glowing red. And they had no... Like as soon as they came into view of you... They knew you were here. They knew you were there before they entered that brush. And they just immediately charged. These animals were not skidged at all. They were on a mission to kill you. Okay? So that's what you encounter when you're... And now we're having venison today.

[02:09:28] Yeah, now you have... I guess... Let's see. Hang on. Let's use a D8. You have about... Salvageably, you have about 30 pounds of elk meat. Cooked. Goes well with the 130 pounds of Triceratops meat we have. Right. One of you... Is... One of you guys have a bag of holding? I have a handy heifersack. Yes, I do.

[02:09:58] I have a handy heifersack. You can just kind of like put all that in the handy heifersack or your bag of holding. See, the trick is when you put meat into your bag of holding. You also throw in a squirrel. Why? Because the squirrel breathes and consumes all the oxygen. That is... That would be one of the cruelest of the best thought of ideas I've ever had.

[02:10:29] And I gotta say, God damn! Nice. Okay, I want the elk who's continuing to travel roll a survival to track... or to navigate through the woods. Okay. I'm also gonna put up I have a terrible idea for later just because of one dumb item I have. And I'm not gonna say anything else than that because it's gonna be funny if I can make it work. Okay. Okay. Now I don't recall what I gave you for items.

[02:10:58] I mean, I made your item list. I'm not gonna read it. I have an idea. It's dumb. It's gonna be funny. 19. 19? Okay, so you managed to get there and get to the bottom of the mountain within that day. That giant rabbit antlers just like fucking GPS. Yeah, okay. Well, it's also a giant like... It is kind of a major landmark like it's right ahead of you. It's like trying to run...

[02:11:27] I can literally see over the trees. I mean, I was gonna say on an island there's a mountain. It's hard to fucking miss. Well, it's also it's a pretty big island but also like it's more like if you're traveling through like the woods around like Devil's Devil's... That big like that big mountain that is in Close Encounters of the Third Kind. Devil's Plateau. Yeah, the Devil's Plateau. It's like going it's like walking through the woods there and not seeing the fucking mountain. Like it's right there. Good fucking luck. Yeah, exactly. You're gonna see that shit from anywhere. Yeah, so he doesn't

[02:11:57] get lost in the brush and you guys don't come across any other like creatures that try to attack you although you do occasionally hear like the odd like howling or like distant howling and stuff like that. 170 aggressive squirrels. I... On this list it does have 2d4 hairs that I basically I would just honestly treat as a swarm just at you it just comes at you because like yeah the animals here seem unusually aggressive.

[02:12:27] Like almost like they're being controlled or something. Almost. Yeah. But yeah, you reach the base of the mountain you see this you see a couple of like loose trails that kind of start going up and such. Scaling the summit of Mount Frosnir it's gonna be difficult terrain and it will you guys will have to be forced to go at a slow pace. It'll take roughly about 2 days to get to the top of the mountain. About 3 full days to get to the top of the mountain.

[02:12:57] Except for the giant. I'm currently running a giant elk. Well an elk is still not going to like an elk is still gonna have trouble going up a very like some of the precarious trails. Of course. So are you still staying in elk form as you ascend the mountain trails? For as long as seems valuable. Okay. roll a survival attack. Another survival check. Okay. I get plus 8 to these.

[02:13:35] Though we're gonna have to camp for the night soon. Yeah. We'll have probably like 3 situations. Basically yeah it's still gonna be 3 days of this and like How's a 27 do? 27? Alright I'll say you can get about it takes about 2 days but you do have to stop for the first night. And actually roll me another D8 as your 7. 7? Okay. Alright so

[02:14:04] who is stopping and setting up camp and some of that on the side of the hill? Or the side of the mountain? Okay. Yeah. Are you guys doing a watch overnight? Say we volunteer to go first so long as the other guys agree that it's pertinent to have a watch. You're on a mountain that has so far like has things around it that has tried to kill you. To be fair I'm with a druid who carries weed on all the time so my decision making might not be the

[02:14:34] best so as long as everybody else agrees that it might be a good idea. So I have to use no spells. I do not actually need the extended rest currently. Okay. Well I need a rest. I need at least a short rest. So I can take the night. Okay. I mean I've been running an elk so yeah so you're rested. Okay. Essentially there needs to rest. Me and you have kind of been here. Then I'm going rest. Okay so you're sleeping. So I

[02:15:04] have a hunter's trap. I'm going to place it on our trail into the camp. I'm going to need that in a second. I just needed to take one picture. So what is it? I have a hunter's trap. I'm going to place it on our trail coming in to camp behind us. Okay. There's one in my bag if you want to set a second one. I shall set that on the other way. Okay. I shall use my dark vision to continue a watch. Okay.

[02:15:33] I assume for a creature or something like that to bypass that they have to roll something. Yes. They'd have to roll a perception to evade it. Yeah. Or a dex to avoid it. Gotcha. Okay. That's only if they're falling on our trail in or coming down the mountain. Yeah.

[02:16:09] Thank you. Okay. Where are you? Now I have the stats for a giant octopus and a giant goat. A giant goat you say? Yes. Large size. So about the size of a horse. So technically I could carry somebody on me. What would the difficulty check be for the traps? I don't know. I don't know how to bring it down. The hundred traps? Finding it.

[02:17:00] DC 13 dex saving code. DC 13? Yeah. Or 1d4 piercing damage and stop moving. How much piercing damage? 1d4. 1d4. Okay. Yeah, you guys hear a yelp from the trail going down from the mountain. And you see a large lumbering form trying to get out of the hunter's trap. I'm going to use my decanter

[02:17:30] of entless water and send as much water in that direction as I possibly can. Okay. My fun item I've been waiting to use. Yep. Before he does I'm making a perceptual test. You are asleep. Or is that rule for the I heard the yelp. Yeah, fine. Fair. I mean yeah, you also would have been the one I had an idea then I lost it. Are you still an elk boy you're sleeping or are you No, I'm back in I can only maintain yelp

[02:17:59] form for three hours at a time. Yeah. I was like I have a fun item. We're in the cold. I have two things that will help me in the cold. One of them is water and the other is my boots that ignores ice in winter. 23. Okay, so you I'm making a perception test because I want to see if there's glowing red eyes down where I heard that yelp. Yeah, you see a large, very large wolf shaped silhouette with red eyes

[02:18:29] frantically like trying to get out of the trap. And then a torrent of water just smashes into it and then you see, you hear like a sickening bone snap and further like horrible like wolf like wolf like whimpering as it just goes tumbling off the ledge and falls. And then a few seconds later It worked. I don't care. I rolled a nat one on

[02:19:00] its 14 save to like not like it just rushed off the edge. So yeah, you go and check the trap. There's still a wolf's paw there. That's exactly where I thought that was going but yeah. But you and you're some of you guys are elves you look down over the ledge of the And there's no body. No, the body's there. It's splat across the snow and the rocks and it's gone.

[02:19:29] I love using random items in the dumbest ways. Yeah, it felt like it felt pretty well. It was one of those it's just too good not to. Yeah. So night passes though after that. Nothing else comes after you guys. There's a waterfall out of nowhere. What the fuck? But yeah, dawn rises and dawn comes hot. Yeah.

[02:19:58] And you guys continue on moving. I need you to roll enough. If you're the one that's traveling as an elk or a mountain goat. Mountain goat now. I need you to roll a survival check. Okay. So how was everybody's day? I think it's been pretty good so far. Boring. Aw. Good birthday.

[02:20:37] 23. 23. Okay. Yeah. Roll, everybody can roll perception. As you're walking along and such. I hate that die so much. I was really hoping we cursed earlier. Maybe it's just rolling once for you. Oh. 17. Yeah, you're just too, I guess, like, you're holding on too tightly and such. 17. 17?

[02:21:12] It's almost there. Perception? Yep. 23. Okay, so the mountain goat and the halfling between his horns, I guess, yeah, you do spot on the trails and some of that around, there are a couple, you spot a couple of instances where there are large humanoid footprints in the snow. Hmm?

[02:21:42] That's your image. Yeah, yeah, you see like a large, like, probably about two feet, or about two times the size of a normal human foot. Boys, I've had a shack. It seems to be a shack. It's only the abominable snow. Well, you say it, you joke, but about halfway,

[02:22:12] about nearing the end of the day, like, you can see the sun kind of cresting the mountain ranges like beyond this mountain, and that's when you guys hear the cold air howls down the mountain as you find yourselves on a snow-covered stony trail in between a large snowbank and a cliff with a 20-foot drop. Suddenly, you hear a bestial roar and through the snowbank leaps a white-furred yeti with large black horns, claws barred.

[02:22:43] So, initiatives as a yeti has out. This motherfucker is so dead. Fireball! Hang on, you gotta roll your initiative first. No, that was my initiative. Oh, that was your initiative? Okay. First initiative. Eleven. Eleven? Okay. Fifteen. Oh,

[02:23:13] yeti also got a nat 20. So, what's your dex 30? My initiative modifier is plus eight. No, what's your plus four? I'm gonna find a yeti. Yeti probably doesn't have no plus four. Nope. So, you are going first out of the 220s. What did Greenleaf get? Fifteen. Fifteen. And you got in sand at eleven? Yes, sir.

[02:23:48] Sam was too busy taking a sip out of the flask, and they start popping on. Yeah, wait, what? Yeah, it's like, what? What now? All right. Wait, let me swallow. We're relighting the pipe for the goat. Yeah. What are you doing? Magic missile at the yeti. I was going to say, he's picking up dice right now, so nothing's good. magic missile. We are ten.

[02:24:20] Five, seven, ten damage. Ten damage. Okay. Um, yeah, it doesn't like that, but it's still up, or it's still around. because he's a dick, because he's a dick cheese, um, with chilling gaze. Um, if the target can see the yeti, the target must succeed. A D, yeah,

[02:24:49] roll a constitution saving throw. Ooh, I fail. Okay, um, I will roll the dead, and you are paralyzed for a amount of time. So you are, you take eight cold damage, and you are paralyzed for one minute. Oh, ten rounds.

[02:25:21] So, um, and then, um, that is, oh, no, then it's going to make, uh, some, it's going to go after, um, the paralyzed, oh, no, it's not gonna go after the paralyzed, it's gonna go after the goat. Um, what makes this really interesting is I'm still on the goat. Yeah. So, well, I don't even need to move. Everyone else is moving for me. So, let's see how this goes, because it's got two attacks to

[02:25:51] go. I do convert me to rage for any sort of luck. Yeah. It can use that ability and it's Yeah, it's a multi-attack. The Getty can use its chilling gaze and make, and then makes two claw attacks. Fuck me. Um, so it got, uh, a 21. That'll probably hit. I gotta check my stats here. Yeah, that'll hit. Okay, um, and actually, it's not gonna do initial damage, like slashing damage or anything,

[02:26:21] because it's actually trying to grab you and toss you. So, uh, you gotta do, we gotta do a, a, uh, basically a, post-strength roll, a strength saves. I'm sure-footed, so I have advantage against, uh, strength and dexterity for things that, uh, could not be prone. Yep. Oh, that's actually pretty good.

[02:26:51] It is a strength? Yes. Yeah, guess I'm gonna be here. Yeah, okay. Surprise me? What do you get? Appreciate it. Slugging it down. Okay. A dirty 20. A dirty 20? It got 20, it has 23. So, um, it, it lobs you off, or it, it charges at you, grabs onto you, and then lobs you off the trail

[02:27:20] about, uh, off the 20-foot trail, uh, off the trail about 20 feet down. Um, you can roll, you can roll it down. Can I actually make an argument? I have halfling nimbleness, which means that normally I'm allowed to move through a square so at least the creature is bigger than me. Yeah. Could, in theory, I use this to just get off of him before he's thrown? That's what I was, yeah, I was gonna let, I was gonna let you do like a deck save or something like that as he is a little tossed. Like I said, that's why I wanted to make the argument just so long as I was like, normally it's used like this, but. Yeah. And,

[02:27:50] 20 feet, uh, 20 foot fall would just be 1d6, right? Yeah. You're gonna ignore the first 10 feet. Okay. So you take four bashing, or bludgeoning damages and fall down to the, like down, like farther down the trail about 20 feet. Okay. Um, and, uh, you, uh, nimbleness like just allows you to just do that. It says, so halfway nimbleness, uh, you may move normally through a square occupied by a creature larger than you are. Okay. Then yeah, you just do that. Yeah. So you managed to, like, basically, you run off of him just in time. I kind of like the idea

[02:28:20] of like, like you run off of the, uh, the goat that he is and go, oh, like jump up onto this thing's head and run down at the back and like away from it. Basically, he's just like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Okay. I'm here. I'm good. Yeah. Uh, so, uh, next is the green leaf because I was going to use that. Yeah. Because I was using these two claw attacks to lob somebody off. So, um, yeah, green leaf, you're, you've, you've landed down about 20 feet. Okay. Okay. Um,

[02:28:51] it's all right. right? But it ain't bad. I'm going to get up. Yep. I am going to, uh, That is my favorite reaction to appear. What the fuck? Which means that I have to, um, roll some dice. Yes. It's not bad, but it's weird. Seven, eight, 19, 12 is 31,

[02:29:23] and one is 32. Imagine 12 is 44. Okay. 44 plus 10 is 54. Okay. There is now a giant elk occupying the space where my giant, um, goat was on the ground. Yep. Okay. Well, no, because I'm standing. Yeah. Uh, and now I'm going to charge him. Okay. Well, you're going to have to wind, you're, it's going to take about, um, I'll say it'll take,

[02:29:53] because you're not, you're on the same trail as they are. You said I was 20 feet below. Like you're down, down the mountain about 20 feet on like the lower part of the trail. I'm 18 feet tall. Okay. You're, have you ever seen a deer jump? All right. Roll a, uh, roll a, roll a, uh, acrobatics thing to jump back up. He's not wrong.

[02:30:25] This is quite literally probably the pain in the ass with playing people who actually know a little bit about some of the things they talk about. you're making really good arguments. Um, okay, and this is a strength roll, so that's going to be a total of 19. Okay. Yeah, you managed to, you fall down, and then, all of a sudden, comes back up. And the Yeti was like, go to like, like, like, double takes, he's like, and I'm giving him the horns. Okay. Okay,

[02:30:55] so, since I'm doing this on a charge, uh, ram, plus six to hitch, guess I'll roll for my strength save to, okay, my dice are rolling hot today. Give me a second.

[02:31:29] Yes, that'll win. Okay. Five, and six, and eleven, plus... The way I'm picturing him like, in his head, like, in Elk, he's like, hey man, you're really harsh on my buzz. I picture, man, we could have been friends. Now you gotta die. Okay,

[02:31:59] so that's 16 damage and he has to give me a strength save. Yep, he rolled an at 20. Yeah. So he's not prone. No. He caught my antlers. Yeah. But it wasn't pleasant for him. No, what was the damage again, sorry? 15. 15? Okay. He's not like it. Um, but he is not dead. I also have a lot of hit points in his shape. Hey man.

[02:32:28] You know what makes me happy? I get three attacks. Yeah. Um, alright, next up is Sam. And this is why it makes me happy. I get to at least attempt to attack. Remember, remember, you might want to take part and he's like, I would like to rage. Oh no, I was definitely, I was really kind of going, I need to remember to do this because I usually forget to do this. Excuse me folks, I would like to rage. Now, he's going to turn into a posh British fuck in rage. Okay. Because,

[02:32:58] if we know anything, it's that Britain held a third of the planet and fucked it up somehow. Not wrong. Give me one example where wrong, they had a third of the planet and they fucked it up. Nice. yeah. That is horrible. So, my first attack is a two. Yeah, that doesn't hit.

[02:33:29] Some reason is there no, like, even like, your proficiencies and all that stuff or, for the rage stuff? So, under rage, all it says is advantage on strength checks and saves. Okay, so, yeah, I, you don't think I think of our attack bonus that's all that's written underneath it. Advantage on dex saves, oh, reckless attack, advantage on attacks. Yeah. So, you get to roll two back to that. That one's even worse. Is that nat 1? Yep. Oh god. So,

[02:33:59] you're just like, whoop, that! So, that first one, you get some black ice. So, my second attack, that one's much better, 14. Still not great. 14 plus, better than 10. Uh, 14 plus, what the fuck? Uh, math. Uh, 22. That hit? Or, that'll definitely hit. Like, 14 would hit, honestly. Oh, that's cool. And the other ones wouldn't have, though, because that still would've only been a 10. Yeah. Alright, so 14 will hit, and then, do you want me to roll my bonus attack first

[02:34:29] and end damage, or would you rather damage that other attack? Uh, roll the damage first. This is pretty much. Yeah. That is, 10? No, 11. On top of the, do you not, uh, uh, my damage is D8 plus 5 plus D6. Okay, I guess the D6 is because of the rage, or, or is it what? That's all that's written here. Okay. Yeah, I have to double check about the rage, see if you can get anything on that. Uh, plus 2 damage, so that would actually

[02:34:59] be 12, not 10. Okay. Uh, okay. Um, so it hits. Uh, fucking, my, 15. Holy shit. Is that right? My brain's like, 8 plus 2 plus 5. What's that again?

[02:35:29] Uh, that will hit him. Yay. So actually, you're just like, ah, it was like, boom, boom, just the swinging me. I'm gonna hit him as many times as I need to. I mean, it's on fire. I'm assuming he's made of ice, he might not be. I don't care. My axe is on fire. Yeah. Oh, it's on fire too. yeah, flaming frank pan. I wonder, does he have to, it doesn't specify fire damage anywhere here? Oh, okay. It just says flaming frank, and I don't know. But I appreciate it. It's fire damage. Yeah, I appreciate it's fire damage.

[02:35:59] That's probably what that one die is that you're rolling for on top of it. I would believe it, but there, there's legitimately nothing right in here. It's literally just D8 plus 5 plus D6. I think the D6 is the fire damage. If I had to guess. Yeah. I think it was like 2 or 3. Yeah. So, what will I tell you you're done? So you hit him. So what was the other damage? Yeah, so I hit him twice. The first one was for 10 damage. The second was 15. Yeah, sorry, 12. I guess the plus 2. And the second one was 15. Oh, 15? Yes.

[02:36:29] How do you want to kill him? How does it look? So, like I said, with the flaming axe, it's, you said it was a yeti, right? Yeah. So I have it in my head, right? That's what you're fighting. Okay, cool. So essentially, with him distracted by the elk, because the elk all of a sudden jumped up where he threw a goat. trying to gore him, but he's like, holding onto its antlers. Well, he threw a goat, and then all of a sudden there's an elk there. Yeah. I'm pretty sure that's confusing for any of us, let alone a yeti. He definitely double-taked when it came back up. So I'd say, essentially what Sam does is he goes to swing for the knee

[02:36:59] and just entirely misses with that first attack. Yeah. And then when he looks, he sees the back of the knee and goes, that's much better. So he takes them out at the knee and as the yeti falls, he just catches them in the neck. Nice. Yeah. All right. Which then, I just imagine also like, so he was dead, but then, um, but then actually, fuck you. Greenleaf's elf mode, or elf mode, basically just gored him further. Oh, absolutely. So it's just like, yeah, so it's just,

[02:37:29] yeah, he's just dead. Meanwhile, there he's very back. Like you, you look, you're like, you're like, you're like coating some frost and such when you were like that. Sam just walks over and starts thawing with his axe. Yeah, yeah, basically what happens. My axe is on fire. I mean, it can melt him. It's gonna take a bit, but. Well, it only lasts about a minute, so like less than a minute later, like he suddenly like, he starts like being able, you start being able to move again. Take back, you fiend.

[02:37:58] Where to go? I just see this, this gore pile of like white, like red, red and blood coated fur. But, uh, yeah, no, you, you defeated the yeti. This is what I'm saying, I'm proving the fuck out of everything you got to do for him. Yes. Yep. Uh, okay. So, um, yeah, um, you can press on then, uh, once, well, we'll wait till Aaron gets back, but you guys can press on, uh, continuing back up, uh, continuing up the mountain. Woo!

[02:38:29] Red Dead Boy. Unless you want to like, you know, take something of the yeti's corpse. I mean, I would love to take one of his horns. Yeah, you can take both horns, honestly. Beauty. Yep. Is his pelt worth anything? Uh, it might be. Uh, on the black market. I mean, I mean, Yeah. if you guys roll a survival, you can see how well, how much you can get off of it. Maybe not the meat, but the, the pelt and the horns and such. Oh, I do have training in that.

[02:39:00] Okay. Eight. Um, it's, it's a rough job, but you, you imagine you get the horns at least, like, um, and even though you break them off, like you, you didn't get like the full, like, kind of like, you know how you get like, take the part of the skull. You don't get, you don't get part of the skull, like along with it, like how like you usually do for like horns and stuff. Yeah. But you get the horns themselves, like, they're usable. Yeah. Um, the pelt, you get most of it. It's, it was kind of gored and, and sliced up a bit in patches. So.

[02:39:30] Like something cool. You can probably make like a, you might make, be able to make a good, uh, like a scarf or, or, or a, or a yeti scarf. Yeah. A yeti scarf. Yeah. They, he, one set of gloves. He, he, he, he, he killed it. Oh, I killed it. he, and like two swings. Yeah. I took him out of the knee, then chopped his head. Much better spot. You distracted him, so. Yeah. Yeah, he was still holding onto your antlers as he was getting killed. I missed my first attack, and then looked at the back of his knee and went,

[02:40:00] that looks tasty. Took him out of the knee, and then chopped him the neck. That sound effect was perfect. That was, it was like, I have an idea. Hey. Okay, so yeah, you guys continue up the mountain after you've, also they skimmed the, the yeti and took its horns. Okay. He has enough pelt for like, a scarf, with the, the survival job he did. Although I did suggest a pair of gloves. Yeah, that should have been. Yeah, gloves would also work. I'd say, I'd say a scarf or gloves. You can make gloves.

[02:40:31] Dude. Dude. Gloves with zone of cold. Or, dude, yet boots. Like, like, like a yeti, a yeti, like fur trim boots. I already have boots of winterland. Oh, I'm fine. With the boots with the fur. Yeah. I already have them. You need the gloves with the fur. Yeah. Zone of cold. No, once I have the boots with the fur, I need to have a lot of jeans. We need to find somebody who has something to do with jeans and apples though. Well, actually, there is, there is a war for it

[02:41:00] in a shop. That is, literally, his name is, Demons. Or, yeah, no, his name is Jorts. He wants to, he wants to make demon hide, he wants to use demon hide to make jeans and jorts and stuff like that. Fuck, you don't need to help him. Yeah. Which means you guys gotta go demon hunting because he wants demon scale and demon weapon. I guess that's what's next then. Hence, they have to play because it's like demon, or like demon jorts or demon jeans. Yeah. So, once we get into this creature, we'll have like a hag

[02:41:30] corset. Ew. I suppose you can wear a hag corset if you like. So, yeah, as you guys are, yeah, after you're done with the Yeti there, you should continue on the mountain. I assume, like, riding the elk some more. Yeah, I'm in elk form now. That's what I got before I gotta take a rest. Yeah. You got one more night there. Okay, I can't do it anymore. I have to take too much.

[02:42:00] You guys set up a fire and I assume you don't have to sleep again? Yeah. Yeah. Well, I need a rest. I don't need a long rest necessarily. I just need a short rest to replenish my animal shapes. And I haven't really cast any spells. Yeah. Somebody can also roll me one more survival test as you guys are traveling and setting up your fire and stuff like that. Well, I am the master of the woodlands. I'm trying to sit between the antlers. Yeah.

[02:42:39] 16 plus 8? 24. 24? Yeah. Yeah, you guys, like, a night pass and nothing actually seems to happen. It does get pretty cold like up here because it's pretty high up. Mountain. Yeah, you do hear and you do hear some strange sounds in the night but nothing comes after you. and yeah, on your third and final trip or final day up there you eventually come to the mouth of a large cave right under the peak of Mount Frosner. A foul smell

[02:43:08] wafts from the cave inside slowly ascent kind of merging out of the darkness of the cave a bipedal frog-like creature gnawing on a bone and a few feet behind him a hunched over old woman with a grey wooden staff gazing at a crystal ball with a wicked laugh. Along the walls of the cave are a series of small tables with strange bone statuettes upon them. And then the banderhob attacks. So that's the

[02:43:38] giant frog monster that's coming at you. Addison? Little sherry? What the fuck is a frog surviving in the cold? If I cover him in water he's just gonna freeze. I kinda just wanna cover him in water so he freezes. It's probably the banderhob. Yep. Isn't that necessarily a frog? It just looks like a frog. Water still freezes. Doesn't matter. Doesn't matter if you're a tiefling or not.

[02:44:07] Well if anybody has arcana they can do a roll to identify what it is. That's all you sir. 18 plus 6. 24. 24. Yeah that like I said it is a banderhob so it is a creature from the shadowfell. Sort of like the dark feywilds. So he's not actually amphibious. No. It just looks like No and it's a creature of winter. Yeah. And in vulnerable thing.

[02:44:37] Hmm? Do I know what it's vulnerable to? Um not really. I mean winter I would assume fire and the fact that I'm holding a flaming axe is probably not a good thing for it. How close is it to the hag? The hag is about 20 feet behind it. And she is cackling at you guys and reading what looks like some magic. 20 feet of an magic number.

[02:45:07] Yes. You can roll your fireball. Ah 10. Why don't you roll an attack on fireball? Thank you question actually. I mean I'm still sitting on the elk. So I think I've even removed you. I'm like yeah this looks kind of fucking awesome and the fireball was flying by. I'm like oh hey look at that. Also if you guys want to roll for initiatives we might as well get that done. Dex save? I'm going to roll the dex save.

[02:45:37] Well first we're doing initiatives first. Let's get that out of the way because it's like yeah. 14. Okay. 11. Okay. What's the what's your dex save or what's your dex modifier again? Four. Four? Okay. Which is wild. Yeah.

[02:46:07] Okay that's definitely going after you. Okay. 15. Yes again. Wow. Okay so it's actually going to be Greenleaf then Sam then Rich then the Bandarhov and then the Winter Witch. Yeah. I get the fireball of both. You know what makes me very happy? I'm still on the elk. So if you charge us I get to ride him. I haven't moved. I'm sitting between his antlers. It's where I've been sitting this whole time. If you charge us something I'm sitting

[02:46:37] here. And I'm like all I got my axe. Let's go. Away we go. If I end up dying I mean it means he fucked up really. Okay so yeah. I mean you say that but technically at the moment I have like a hundred hit points. I have 84. I have 84. So green link I got 40. Which means the two of us we have like five of him. Well I'm going to I guess I'm going to charge the witch.

[02:47:06] So you're going past the banderhob which will inside an attack of opportunity. That's fine. I can carry. Okay. I have 73 hit points. Which means he takes it for me. Yeah. He can only make one attack of opportunity. I guess it would have to be another. Yeah he can attack my knee. Maybe your hip with feet jumps. Attack of opportunity B's nuts.

[02:47:35] Okay so as you're running past him he is actually going to unleash a tongue attack on me. He's going to make these nuts. So that is going to be 18. That'll hit. Okay. I think. Hold on. Let me just verify. Pretty sure it does. Yes. Dude this is a weird deer. Right? But I didn't hate it so I got two more.

[02:48:06] Well defense man I don't know. I don't hate it but I don't You take 11 necrotic damage. And the target must make a strength save. It is. And according strength save you say. Yep. So how's it going?

[02:48:39] Sorry. Yours is boring. Why can't you roll with the rest of us? It took like an hour and a half to fly three tables bullshit. Uh 13 plus 4 17. Okay that just gets past the uh the save here. So yeah you are uh you are not pulled toward this creature's mouth as you are uh as you are telling you body. It is instead dragged along with me. Um but yeah um so yeah you but it did

[02:49:09] slow you down. I mean. I guess I guess you just yeah it would have only slowed you down if you actually failed that strength save. Yeah so yeah you yeah I weigh like 1500 pounds. Yeah so you still are able to like go after the witch. That's probably conservative for a giant elk. 1500 dude. You guys saw the fucking moose I was sending you. Yes. Yes I did. And those were like mundane moose. Those were like literally average. There was nothing above average. Okay so

[02:49:40] 16 plus 6 is 24. 24 hit? Nope no that's 22. 22 hit? Yes 22 will hit. Fantastic. Fantastic. Last year's peak was fantastic. God damn that's great. You're totally 8. 7 and 7 is 14 and 1 is 15 and 4 is 19 plus 4. I'm going to make a straight save

[02:50:10] all right. For this thing not to go like flying backward in prayer. 23. 23 damage? Yes. Okay. Not dead but and he's got to give me a straight save. Alright. Yeah no she goes just like punk yeah and then goes about like 10 more feet into the darkness of the cave and not prone

[02:50:40] for now. And that's your turn? Yep. Alright Sam. Alright so Sam at this point was on top of him so the hag is like 10 feet away from me. Oh no the hag's now 10 feet away from me. So I have 35 feet of movement so I'm going to get right up nice and close. I'm going to rage I'm going to smack the fuck out of her. Okay. Yeah you see as you're running up to her and I guess your

[02:51:09] pan is on fire because it has that fire damage you do see that she is this horrible she was ever human she is like a deformed twisted version of a human being. Like centuries old like pointy nose like a beak practically of a nose. Her hair hair is wispy and white her teeth are just black gums and horrible shark teeth and her eyes are just blood red and she's staring at you. She is definitely not human

[02:51:39] she's more like someone of those nighthags you've heard about. Sam's going to have a moment of thank you it's easier and he takes his first breath. That is horrible but that is 16 to hit. 16 will not hit. Oh hang on you're attacking somebody that's prone. Yes. Take an advantage. Yep.

[02:52:09] I was already at an advantage for raging. Okay so then yeah you're good. Oh so if it was just 16 yeah you still don't hit her. Alright. Two more attacks. Now did you offer her a brown paper bag before you shocked her? 23 to hit. That will hit. What fucking math. 13 damage. 13

[02:52:39] Okay and then it is 21 to hit. Ah 21 will hit. It is 16 damage. 16 damage? Yes sir. Okay okay yep she is not doing very good she's not like any of this this is not how she thought her day was going to go. Glad to hear that.

[02:53:10] and next up is Richard so there's they're inside and you see like the commotion inside of the cave and there's still this giant lumbering frog creature in front of you. Okay I don't care about the frog creature I can still see the hag. Kind of she's like half obscured by Sam I can still hit her on the magic missile yes yeah would the magic missile be hit I'd say like she'd

[02:53:40] be half cover because of Sam like magic missile ignores all cover if he can see her he can hit her 7 10 damage 10 damage yeah she's not lick you up there

[02:54:10] Richard you can lick my balls would that I will I am a vendor home we we get over it on that one okay

[02:54:43] yeah it yeah it gets 14 14 yeah yeah hits yeah okay all right you're gonna have to make a strength check by the way and you take 13 necrotic damage uh

[02:55:13] dirty 20 strength save okay so you are not being pulled by the tongue but you take 13 uh necrotic damage as it lashes out its tongue at you and such um and then is the witch's turn um he had both he has radios i was seeing them

[02:55:44] bounce um she uh grabs she hops up like from prone and uh using her her gray staff she starts rocketing out of the cave away from you guys so you guys but she's riding past she's driving she's riding past uh sam and um and green and uh uh rich and green leaf which would invoke an attack of opportunity as she flies she's flying out of the um the cave and tried to escape okay she's like what this

[02:56:14] bullshit okay well don't you flee you have to leave another day uh sorry what oh yeah so what does that get for your uh so because i'm raging do i still get advantage or is it just a straight i think yeah 18 uh 18

[02:56:45] uh uh 16 damage 16 damage okay and what did how did greenleaf fare uh i rolled an 18 so that's gonna hit okay okay so what's the damage on what how are how's greenleaf how are you damaging because you're still on hill right

[02:57:17] no giant constrictor snake elk there we go that'll be uh 12 damage how do you want to kill her oh okay she's like fuck this but ah you guys take all the fun out

[02:57:47] i'm gonna do the elkish version of the people's elbow i'm gonna jump straight up twist around catch her with my antlers and slam them straight into the ground yeah snapping your spine like and everything all of them all and she's like hits the ground like slams it just like and just falls um also her uh yeah and her gray staff her that gray staff

[02:58:16] just clatters a few feet ahead of her as she let go from the attack okay and uh she's dead but uh the banders the uh the bander hob is still there and does not seem to have gone away or like a summoner okay i'm gonna stand back up with her you know impaled still on my antlers and stand up and face him with with her facing him and just am i supposed to be

[02:58:46] intimidated fuck that bitch have you heard of a shot do you want to try and convince the bander i can't talk as an oh true yeah i'm standing where her alive body used to be yeah and now the dead body's on her antlers yeah well i don't know also the banderhopper i wouldn't have said that because he's he's pointing

[02:59:16] outward at uh at the uh the wizard so he is the tasty wizard wizards do be tasty that that tasty tasty dick cheese d4 d4 yeah uh but yeah so that's what you do um yeah so sorry top of the yeah so the actually yeah that was top of the round i guess so um uh yeah greenleaf you're actually up again so yeah okay so yeah you went

[02:59:46] and faced her as like uh on your turn i guess you did like went and like showed the body and stuff to him and then you realize he's not facing you he's how far away uh he's about 20 feet away okay perfect that's exactly how far i need to charge so technically it'd be blanked wouldn't it but i guess that doesn't

[03:00:15] like matter in this version of the game it provides advantage okay then yeah you can because he is currently facing the wizard outside uh how does a 15 do uh that just makes it because his ac is 15 he's in melee with me yeah so he is definitely at disadvantage due to a rear attack yeah he's going for a second for an

[03:00:44] antler kebab one on either side it's like what's this mystery it's uh it's like that uh moth clamato like the breakfast clamato where it's like all the stuff on it like in it okay i smash him for 18 uh okay 18 damage yep okay uh he doesn't like that very much but he's still up and about but he's got to give me a strength save yep i was going to say but does he get yai-eded uh probably not yai-ee

[03:01:18] i actually set up uh yeah that's 19 yeah he succeeded yeah i'm sorry this banner i'll just go get frenchie because it's a frog because it's a frog it's a frog it's accurate yep um uh i love how you talk to french people and you mention the phrase sacre bleu they all laugh at you mm-hmm you know what's even funnier comment sabba

[03:01:48] they get so mad they take it so fucking personally which is why i do it habitually well the quebec french do the parisian french don't yes they do yes they do which is why we do it a lot of french canadians are also like really like all their squares like all their squares like tabernacle or tabernacle is literally a tabernacle real quick story training with parisian french they absolutely take it as a personal fucking offense when the quebec will open their mouth well yeah

[03:02:17] i actually so anytime you make fun of french at all it takes personal offense but the hilarious thing is when you start speaking them in english because what what what they get even more mad it's so funny okay i i've actually i actually confirmed that because my buddies one of my buddies uh uh his his wife now uh was was from paris france like was like a parisian france um when they met and stuff like that and i one one of the hangouts we asked i asked her is like so is it true that like parisian french

[03:02:47] folk don't like the quebec french folk and he's like he's like that isn't 100 percent accurate we do not like that they've tested they're like if you if you try and if you try and say that the two are the same yeah they're like your family tree needs to be fucking burnt well like fuck you and everybody you came from but i mean like the quebec french bastardized their language like hards for it like you've got potato or the apple of the earth which one sounds more

[03:03:17] majestic that's like comparing american to british english yes of course it's bastardized of course it is yeah it's like a there's an ocean separating the geographically culturally that's going to happen well exactly what did you think was going to happen it was going to be the same our english is actually not that far off of british english that's gave the middle finger to every member of the royal family but i'm just saying that the french that are

[03:03:46] here we're modern english english is a put on from like the boarding school days yeah essentially it's a fake yeah it's a it's a posh it's posh versus like yeah yeah anyway uh back to the uh the banner problem back to the thing we're here to do um so it's uh sam yeah sam's you're uh you're right so how far am i from this fucking at this point you're about you're about 30 feet away all right

[03:04:16] sweet i can move 35 so you're basically like so you're like because he's like he's like stabbed him in the back like like i'm just gonna run underneath him i was gonna run underneath him or like run over him and just like haha nah i'm probably just running underneath him because he's sitting there like trying to just dab at this guy just underneath okay fair so yeah just swing him yes what the fuck does that say that is uh 23 to hit 23 to hit yes sir

[03:04:45] um that will hit for sure so that is uh 13 damage okay my second time that is the same roll uh 14 to hit uh 14 hit will not hit didn't think so and this one is another 14 so that's not gonna hit okay so you imagine like

[03:05:16] paying like like one of his legs or like you like you go for the groin shot and like there's nothing there it's like damn that usually works yeah went for the taint last time what the shit yeah uh and richard so i'm disengaged take one step back and just missile him directly right in the face at third level with my power order okay

[03:05:45] i do believe the translation is fuck you so all four four four four 16 uh 21 okay so the plus three damage per okay so the power word is plus one is it is plus three per attack yeah per dart or per attack erin sorry

[03:06:13] so the power word says yeah uh you can once per turn you can deal damage to a creature or object for the wizard's spell you can spend one power series to get extra force damage to that turret extra damage deals damage equal to your half your wizard level which is three is that per dart or per the attack no it's per attack wow that's gay as hell this thing sucks yes except that you can add it to

[03:06:43] cantrips once per turn once once per turn you can only cast one cantrip per turn still sucks so that's uh 16 24 16 20 23 damage okay that's uh that is sizable um like

[03:07:14] so uh yeah next uh i believe actually is him yeah it's the banderhub um so he is going to bite down or he is going to turn around and uh every now and then he feels a little bit oh actually hang on hang on he's going to uh not turn around um he teleports um 30 feet behind you guys into the cake

[03:07:45] okay uh he shadow steps um and then um uh then he uh uses the tongue attack again fireball on on uh on uh uh not you because you're underneath him so actually you'll probably be attacking yeah because i doubt he can see me yeah i see him through me i was just saying me being underneath you would be way harder to grab me than you yeah uh so that's going to be probably like 20 something hang on

[03:08:15] yeah it's 21 to attack you that'll hit okay and you're the size of a barn uh so that's going to be 14 damage and i need to roll another strength save if you're the size of a barn yeah it's easy to hit you um do we want this guy for anything like what i can sleep him

[03:08:45] for 5d8 mm-hmm mm-hmm do we want some frog legs extra fresh just give me my face okay you are not pulled by the creature okay i will i will giggle in elk come here get in my belly he's suddenly

[03:09:15] scottish now get in my for some weird reason it's really really awkward yeah um but uh everyone likes their own brand uh but uh yeah no top of the round green green leaf okay um he's in the cave how far in the cave uh he is 30 feet uh yeah up to 30 feet so i'll say he teleported about 20 feet into the cave so

[03:09:46] you were yeah so basically i'm a huge creature do i fit in the cave yeah he's basically back where the witch originally was oh yeah which is where i came from yeah okay you're just like back and forth yeah you're just running back and forth all right i'm going to uh switch back to human form okay i don't know are we killing this bitch i mean we killed the other bitch so i don't see why not

[03:10:16] yeah she's still like oh yeah i guess she's still on her antlers so as soon as you teleport back she's like i was saying i just like a second beat us then uh 30 feet away i got two options i can go in with the melee or i can do the more wizardy thing i mean i'm definitely

[03:10:46] gonna go in for melee that's still alive so okay then i'm going to uh throw my staff up at the air and uh call lightning down on that sun bitch that sun bitch inside the cave yeah it conjures a uh storm cloud in the localized area gets busy just like and goes through orcs into the cave as long as you're good with that then i'm good with that

[03:11:16] okay is that gonna create a thunder clap though it doesn't say that it does in the spell i mean because that would be additional damage yeah and which is still outside i'm standing beside him the only one that's directly in the cave is the frog

[03:11:49] he's gotta give me a reflex save okay easy roller dice i'm rolling hot today uh 20 dirty 20 and then he succeeds so he takes half damage from my 26 so then yeah 13 damage okay and i can do that every round for the next 10 minutes just lightning

[03:12:18] yep just a bolt every round for up to 10 minutes guys guys guys shock shock shock shock shock shock shock shock oh shit there's the episode name yeah shock um so uh yeah next up that's what greenleaf did uh so samwise or samscope sorry this is gonna shock everybody pun intended

[03:12:49] but i'm gonna run up and chop them okay so he's about 20 feet away uh yeah at this point yeah all right i got 35 feet so i'm good that was not great 17 to hit uh okay um yeah sweet that is not as good as i would have hoped 10 damage uh 10 damage yes sir okay 12 12 to hit to hit no

[03:13:22] and 19 to hit that'll hit yay that is 7 9 14 damage how do you want kill him i i think it's i think it's honestly gonna be because it was the two attacks i think it's just gonna be like a chop to the gut and then chop for the head just uh just like i missed going for the legs so i'm not gonna go for the legs anymore so you just like disembowel him and then as he drops you just like jump up and like slid his throat

[03:13:51] as another bolt of lightning just like comes down like again just like hits him yeah surprised he didn't do like hey man you know what happens when a toe gets struck by lightning same thing that happens to everything else it gets smoked yep and then he's just like and then just like falls falls over next to you and just like gore just comes out of its stomach and stuff like that

[03:14:21] probably just slowly slowly steaming in the cold air of the mountain sam just looks around and goes beer um beer two days that way yeah and uh you look around uh now that it's all quiet inside the cave and yes there are indeed um a bunch of uh yeah there's a there's a bunch of of uh tables lining this cave um some of them have

[03:14:48] been toppled over at this point but some of them are still intact with uh with ivory statues or statuettes of like various um like things not just like not just uh people but also like animals and so there's actually one uh that looks newer than the others the other ones have like kind of a dusting on them uh but there's a new one that looks like a tript looks like a what yeah it looks like a tript and uh the magically inclined can tell that there's something there's

[03:15:16] some kind of um arcane influence about these statuettes so you guys could rule it somebody could rule an arcana 20 30 20 20 okay um yeah most of these statuettes don't have a whole lot of magic left to them like there's like some old residual magics to them but the newest statuette the the trout statuette

[03:15:44] uh definitely has um an old magic to like an old magic um curse to it dispel magic uh that might work yeah would uh dispel magic work or would you need like uh like remove curse for if it's like a legit curse it might work i'll i'll love the on based off what i read it for like this thing i'll let the uh dispel

[03:16:11] magic also work for this um dispel magic you have to make a check if this if the curse or spell yeah is a higher level than his casting gotcha remove curse removes the curse period okay it does not fail yeah dispel magic has a chance of failure yeah i gotcha

[03:16:39] so just feel magic for each spell of third or fourth level or higher on the target make an ability check of your spell casting ability to an intelligence check 23 uh 23 yeah the magic you you feel the magic break within this within the trout statuette and it is now just a nice pristine well carved ivory statuette of a turt of a tript

[03:17:06] um honestly like you're looking at the other statuettes and stuff there's about 15 bone statuettes in here all told they're pretty look they look pretty good craftsmanship you guys could probably sell them for a pretty penny assuming any magic like they they only have like residual magic um within them anymore it's really active yeah or it's gone like or it was it was used at one point as a conduit for something but it's now just like uh it's just a shell all right it's all

[03:17:33] going in the haversack okay um also on the witch uh now that you're yeah i want to know about her staff well you take a look at the staff and it is a is made of uh gray wood uh like a like gray wood tree kind of staff um it doesn't have any magic to it there's like no mojo to it um do you want to

[03:17:57] roll a arcana or history or i mean they're the same world for me yeah i'll roll an arcana on it sure yeah it's at default 20 20 um so this actually wasn't a night hag you really you're like looking at the corpse now it's like oh no this is a night hag this is a burr hag it's like a winter hag the winter witch was actually accurate like it's a it's a it's an arctic cold witch or

[03:18:21] like cold hag um her her gray staff uh only works for hacks it doesn't it is a conduit of magic for hags specifically that they have to like make themselves and it only works for them so anyone else it's just a normal walking staff all right so you're just snapping right now yeah okay fine nobody else is using this yeah um you also find on her um kind of like in the core of her um her

[03:18:49] crystal ball that she was using to scry um and uh i'll say you know without rolling anything if you guys are looking deeper into the tunnel into the cave and stuff you don't find a whole lot else aside from a uh a scroll of some kind so unless you have like a way of like identifying scrolls pretty sure he's got to identify i do identify but you don't need to have it prepared you don't need to have it prepared because you can cast it as a ritual okay it's a ritual just takes 10 minutes

[03:19:17] well in which time i will take the staff and break it into more pieces and then use produce flame to make a campfire and while they're doing that i'm gonna take the hag's head as proof to both towns hold on yeah split the hag directly down the center no i take the head one hat one town gets the head the other time it's the body fair one town gets the left ear one town gets the right here

[03:19:43] the hag didn't listen though the ears don't work clearly i was surprised like you don't keep one gets the hang the other one gets the banderhob's head i mean that could work too i mean it could but trying to blame it all on banderhog and say there was a hag without evidence of a hag yeah i figure you give one half the head you have the half the body they're not going to work together to resurrect a hag fair true hell if anything they're both gonna be like no fuck you this is mine yeah

[03:20:10] they'll keep an ark for us we have a new tavern now exactly the hags head the banderhags the hags head in the hags body tavern yeah or the no that the hags head in and the headless hag tavern yeah same shit different name either way they got beer better ring to it yeah as long as they have beer i don't care it's all about marketing man no it's all about beer yeah so you uh you spend

[03:20:39] that 10 minutes doing the ritual to identify um it is a scroll of greater invisibility and um uh yeah you guys are you guys gonna do like it's not i think it was too i think it was like morning when you guys uh finally got to the top of the mountain so uh are you guys just gonna start heading back down the mountain to the uh to the i'm assuming i'm writing an elk so in in the

[03:21:06] morning yes but it was morning so like like before this right before this fight started so like you have the rest of the well we need a rest yeah because you take a few hours then yeah and then head back okay uh as you guys are traveling or as you're about to leave um you guys can only make a perception test okay

[03:21:29] 14 14 17 17 air oh i thought you were just like i'm not doing it forgot i should have sorry guys i should have brought this freaking the little binding coaster i have for it uh perception um that's gonna be 19 plus 8. okay 27 so the elk

[03:21:56] sees it um you see as you guys are about to like depart the uh the uh the um the the platform or the area around the the cave uh you think you see um through like the rays of sunlight that are kind of peeking through the gray clouds above um and through like the wind and the snow you think you see a pale tall woman uh with white hair and blue skin just look at you guys approvingly before vanishing into

[03:22:22] the mist and the uh the snow okay well i guess we did what you wanted uh and then you uh travel down uh there's nothing else that happens while on the way down it's basically just effectively a three-day journey from the top of the mountain to the nearest town so are you going to tomber home or are you going to colguch i mean i'm riding an elk i don't really think i have any control over the situation i feel like tom were home all the way to go that was the first one yeah yeah that was

[03:22:49] the first time yeah okay okay um you get down there and uh there is actually uh it looks like there's a lot of um commotion around the docks area and stuff uh and there's a bit of a small celebration um and there are you actually see on the way from the forest down to the the town that there is actual there's more there's a lot more deeper um trails back and forth from the two towns um and you're like when you finally get into town you see that there are people from

[03:23:18] colguch and tomber home having some kind of celebration uh and there are like crates and crates of fish being carted out from the docks um and uh eventually bella notes you spot bella in the crowd and some of that and uh and also um uh komak and uh and um and boring and bjorn and they're like uh it's like oh they like it's like the heroes they did it they we they've returned yeah

[03:23:48] and uh bella's like yeah guys uh i told them i explained to uh to born what was going on and uh said that you guys went up to deal with it and then about a couple of days ago uh we the fish started just pouring out of the lake they were jumping they were jumping into the docks and then jumping into people's nets as they ran to the docks um and like everyone uh assumed it's assumes it's you i assume you guys killed whatever was up there that was causing us

[03:24:21] yep okay that's that's i thought i heard something from uh from my patron yeah no she was very pleased about to hear that that bitch is dead something something ding dong the bitch is dead um and uh yeah boring is like uh i was like yes me and my brother and and uh cole mac here have been

[03:24:44] talking and we um oh man and you see you guys like see him he's like he's a little flush and like as all of them and their eyes are a little red it's like once we got to talking and smoking we we realized this whole this whole generational like uh uh grudge match it was really just unnecessary uh and so we've

[03:25:10] since uh decided to uh um let bygones be bygones and we've decided to start building a little bit more like expanding the the shoreline between our two towns so that maybe one day we'll maybe have a have a little bit closer relations of uh for trading and such and then who knows maybe out they'll be able to expand outward from uh from both towns uh so yeah congratulations guys you uh

[03:25:36] you managed to stop the evil that was cursing the lake to uh uh and causing uh causing a bickering uh feud between two towns from starting a war uh it could come really bad um and eventually um an airship comes in from as the other golden sparrow arrives to come pick you guys up and uh um including turva uh sworn the uh the t-frame excellent who um asks if you have any more of that uh that smoke that pipe weed

[03:26:06] oh yeah girl let's go yep and then uh yeah as you guys um a couple more a couple people from town are going to come with you guys because uh somebody mentioned something about um possibly like talking about like getting some important export of uh of um vegetables and stuff so some some salted fish are going to be cut from the lake are coming with them in crates and barrels uh or pickled fish are coming

[03:26:31] from barrels um as a sort of export import kind of situation uh deal so okay yeah the the buckles managed to uh to um save the day something right yeah and you helped uh queen mab um uh take care of a meddlesome little bitch of a of a of a bur hag that she just didn't like so she just wanted to she was tired of hearing of hearing the machinations of this bitch uh so she decided to get rid of her

[03:27:00] okay because she's a petty because she is a stern and petty dictator of uh of the uh of the um cv accords he just happens to have some hit that there you go yeah so yeah um that's that's about the conclusion of the of the winter witch scenario so how much money do you get from the towns oh the town is you get about 300 from from tomberholm uh i will say that kulkutch gives you about it gives you the same

[03:27:29] amount so about 300. so then we point out to the one that we got the same amount from the other and you know oh here's 500 gold then we go back to the other one they do us okay that you're gonna roll uh uh you have to roll something to that i was gonna say it's time we get some jokes i mean i'm dropping somebody yeah you're holding them yeah so you made about 200 each from from bella uh twillo

[03:27:58] um you made about 300 from tomberholm you made about 500 from kulkutch and then let's see if you can squeeze another 100 out of that or something or at least don't that would make it like make it let's see let's see 16. they give you another 100 gold okay can't quite match so three five and two

[03:28:29] so that's that's thousand is that a thousand a piece or a thousand total uh so the the from the town it was it was total not not okay yeah you're only getting 200 each from bella okay but you also have uh the statuettes like if you guys card all those and i will say that those um will fetch you guys

[03:28:50] uh 25 gold a piece you know 15 okay and they are like fine crafted ivory statuettes uh once used for cursing various individuals and groups in on the island of uh 375 orthos 125 each yeah for slightly used magical curse statuettes

[03:29:21] even after just throwing 25 gold around still made money and this is why sam just doesn't give a shit about money i can always make money by chopping somebody else's head off it doesn't matter uh and don't worry about experiences because you guys can level up one three is 266. i'm already got the money i'm taking chops and the other side

[03:29:47] 266 and then i get eight that's fine so comments suggestions how do you guys like good to me it was good it was good i had fun yeah it was uh i i grabbed like i saw i found it like two weeks ago when when uh mary asked me to do this and uh i was like the winter witch a horror one shot for dnd by the layer of dragons uh i guess it's like a publishing name yeah the layer of dragons just

[03:30:13] scale leak but uh yeah i read like the the synopsis i was like oh i like this this is gonna be fun to run and it's like a wintry themed thing which and it's not quite winter yet but we're getting there that's enough yeah i feel like the winter everything cool is it just hasn't been snowing like not a wood i don't want to snow but but uh yeah yeah well i guess next time we do this uh

[03:30:37] you guys can level up to level seven so okay wonderful the buttholes are slowly slowly becoming the 18s slowly slowly getting up there catching up to the 18. are they though yeah not to say that they're slouches but you know yeah in comparison well i mean they haven't had as many adventures as

[03:31:04] the as the ass hats that's true but uh the ass hats get more experience that's true but also because we fight bigger stuff yeah you're fighting bigger stuff and also we're going by like the exp thing rather than just like every like and then because this one's like so like we don't do this as often like i feel like just leveling you guys up like for a good job you want to know what would have happened if you guys had not like six like gotten the uh the town to not like go to war because that's like a big thing is if you if the winter which had actually escaped

[03:31:30] then shit would have been bad because it's like um if the winter which is slain and uh and the trout statuette is broken or in this case dispelled uh when the party returns to the town they will find relations between the town good and pesquerel lake filled with fish sounds folk will find the party and tell them that they will always be welcome uh evmira will secretly be angry but colmac bjorn and boren will be very pleased about uh but a bit guilty about their roles in the

[03:31:58] strife of the town wait this one is all mira and mira is uh the mother that you guys never really encountered oh but she was because you guys never really went back oh well you kind of screwed yourself with like talking to carmack and getting that bit of information because you said you were from the other town yeah and kermak's like in the in the like role-playing stuff that he is very paranoid and suspicious so he would have as soon as he finds out that you guys were from the town or like had anything to it he's the guy who trusts you at all he'd accuse you of being spies and once you

[03:32:25] right out of the town um if the winter witch escapes the party will arrive to see the aftermath of the bloody conflict kolkuch and tomberholm went to war with the higher population and laggro's weapons tomberholm was able to defeat kolkuch and boren himself slew komak in on the field of battle in this battle kolkuch is burned to the ground uh and uh the beast living down burned the other one

[03:32:52] to the ground yeah because they well well because you guys also didn't go to the uh you can go to laggro's laggro has uh laggro's blades which is uh he's a blacksmith um who's been in town recently he's been in town for the last few years he's been uh basically arming like like oh he's an open like basically he's he's really into um uh public militia oh you want a sword use a sword yeah yeah he was yeah literally when you go in there it's like hey how you doing you want a sword like you

[03:33:19] never know when the when those bastards in kolkuch are going to attack what is a single weapon i can sell you one today or he actually he just gives you one for free like he's straight up arming the the public for a for a battle against my kind of guy he's doing that yeah like i said my kind of guy yeah but yeah so like but what happens is like basically it's burned to the ground and the party arrives they find tomberholm in shock because the winter witch uh if she survived just appeared

[03:33:44] before boren and the group of townsfolk that just murdered um kolkuch and tells them that she was responsible and then flies off cackling and um then you guys will also find that boren hung himself um out of guilt by a great tree um and the statue anything good on him no i mean i feel even better about killing the bitch i mean it was kind of fun to do but now i'm sure i'm better about it yeah if the statue is found and broken the people of tomberholm will

[03:34:12] live the rest of their days in regret but if it is not broken the people of tomberholm will start to death so if you guys don't like dispel that that the curse it will basically kill the towns in other words they're fucked or they're fucked unless we fix it thank you sir uh yeah glad you guys enjoyed it and uh we'll see you in a couple more months i guess or whatever we'll see how this goes yeah i'm

[03:34:36] enjoying this i yeah but uh i i enjoy playing a stoner yeah a stoner a druid yeah yeah it's pretty good it's pretty good all right talk to you later