ADR - Episode 524: Assistant to Mister Hastings: The Academy Awards

[00:00:00] Oh hello and welcome to Al Dente Rigamortis, I'm Review Cultist.

[00:00:22] I'm Mik.E the Eastants Reval.

[00:00:25] And I'm the Gamer in Yellow.

[00:00:26] And we're here to discuss those internet stories most creepy and most pasta and be critically

[00:00:31] silly doing it.

[00:00:33] And tonight we have Assistant to Mr. Hastings Academy Awards.

[00:00:38] So, yeah, like last week we said after we did Assistant to Mr. Hastings by Serena Wrights,

[00:00:46] we said that there was going to be a sequel and that we were going to discuss it.

[00:00:50] So here we are.

[00:00:53] And this is on Creeppasta.wiki so you can check it out there.

[00:00:59] Serena Wrights who sent us a link to this one along with the original or the first story

[00:01:08] and asked us to discuss it on our show, which we're doing.

[00:01:11] So I suppose before we get too far ahead though, let us give our initial recommendations.

[00:01:18] I'm going to recommend this one.

[00:01:20] I'm not going to recommend this one.

[00:01:24] I'm not going to recommend this one as well.

[00:01:29] Do we all have to put a delay on our I'ms now?

[00:01:31] I just did it as a decision.

[00:01:35] We're all being theatrical.

[00:01:41] Well, let's find out why I liked it and apparently my host did not.

[00:01:45] Whether your opinion will change or by the end of this recording.

[00:01:48] I seriously doubt that.

[00:01:49] It never does.

[00:01:51] It probably has.

[00:01:53] No.

[00:01:53] There's probably evidence of it happening.

[00:01:55] I'm sure it has.

[00:01:57] Audience, comment in the comments section below where it gets posted and give us a time stamp

[00:02:04] and an episode number where I have been able to swayed my immutable co-hosts of their

[00:02:10] opinions.

[00:02:11] I know that you've at least been able to go like bring me at least back to a

[00:02:15] partial or something because you bring up something that actually I enjoyed about it

[00:02:19] that I didn't realize I enjoyed about it as much as I did.

[00:02:21] This is...

[00:02:22] Yeah, all right.

[00:02:23] It's happened.

[00:02:24] I'm pretty sure.

[00:02:25] Sure.

[00:02:27] Maybe I'm just like giving up now on that hope.

[00:02:31] Maybe.

[00:02:32] But regardless, jumping into this story with the rundown featuring Val because it's still

[00:02:41] her POV.

[00:02:42] So Eric Hastings III has been nominated for an Oscar.

[00:02:48] Has been nominated for an Oscar?

[00:02:52] It was for best supporting actor in a horror drama, but he really put in a performance,

[00:03:01] even surprising Valerie who is our narrator, like I said, for this whole story as per the

[00:03:06] original tale.

[00:03:09] It's been a year.

[00:03:10] God damn it.

[00:03:11] As soon as I like...

[00:03:12] One week.

[00:03:13] Yeah, exactly.

[00:03:15] It's been one week since we reviewed the first...

[00:03:22] As soon as I say, it's amazing how things trigger my brain.

[00:03:29] It's been a year since we last saw Val and Eric after the whole Bob dinner incident

[00:03:36] and since Eric has really...

[00:03:38] And since then, Eric has really cleaned up further enduring him to Val.

[00:03:44] They are now preparing to attend the award ceremony and Eric has managed to have Val as

[00:03:51] his plus one at the show.

[00:03:54] And everything is going really well.

[00:03:56] Until they bump into the snooty Yancy Simpson, the son turned actor of the assistant who

[00:04:04] let Eric's father, Eric Jr., die by not feeding him human flesh.

[00:04:11] Suffice to say, despite also being nominated for a best supporting actor, no one likes

[00:04:19] this guy and he's just an asshole.

[00:04:23] And as he tries to start something with Eric on the red carpet, various fellow actors

[00:04:31] come to Eric's defense.

[00:04:33] After this little baffle, they go inside, that being Val and Eric, to the show and

[00:04:40] it starts.

[00:04:41] And when they get to the best supporting actor nomination, the award goes to...

[00:04:47] Gryffindor, Yancy?

[00:04:51] No one applauds the man and he is really just super obnoxious about the whole thing.

[00:04:58] Just getting the award, doing a crappy speech and just leaving the ceremony to go outside

[00:05:05] shortly after with the award.

[00:05:09] Eric is not giving any kind of expression about the situation, but Val is furious.

[00:05:15] She excuses herself and goes outside to find Yancy gloating to his mother on the

[00:05:20] phone about cheating to get the award and ruin Eric's big day.

[00:05:25] In a fit of rage, Val pushes Yancy down the steps of the theater and he dies, breaking

[00:05:31] his neck or what have you.

[00:05:33] To which Val fakes...

[00:05:37] Tries to like fake it all up or tries to like fake tears and gives a performance

[00:05:45] of her own and calls for help trying to fake it as an accident.

[00:05:52] In the chaos that ensues, she gets the Oscar and Eric and they race back to Eric's mansion.

[00:06:01] The Oscar as it turns out was always for Eric and that's when there's a knock on

[00:06:07] the door as some of the actors from earlier arrive at Eric's house.

[00:06:13] And just as...

[00:06:15] She walks into hand.

[00:06:17] Yeah, well that's the thing.

[00:06:19] That's what Eric and Val are concerned about, but it turns out it's all good.

[00:06:25] Because they know that Eric is a cannibal and have some of Yancy's body parts in

[00:06:33] a bag for an evening snack because they're also cannibals.

[00:06:39] Val and the cannibal celebs have a nice after party shindig of sorts.

[00:06:46] And Eric thanks Val for being such a great assistant.

[00:06:50] Finn.

[00:06:52] So yeah, that was assistant to Mr. Hastings, the Academy Awards.

[00:06:59] And I suppose we should move on to...

[00:07:03] Everyone, tolerance of gram inquisitions at this point.

[00:07:07] Honestly, I have nothing.

[00:07:09] So Mikey, the E stands for E.

[00:07:11] All right.

[00:07:13] I may have to clean his messes, cover his ass when he has a public meltdown,

[00:07:24] and provide dinner and entertainment.

[00:07:27] But over the past year, I've gone from really hitting this kind of finding joy in it.

[00:07:34] So it's the...

[00:07:38] One that's really run on sentence.

[00:07:41] Yeah, yeah.

[00:07:44] And then the other is the...

[00:07:48] I've gone from really hating this to kind of finding joy in it.

[00:07:54] There's no comma to separate that.

[00:07:57] Okay, yeah.

[00:07:59] It sounded like you were going to counter him with that.

[00:08:01] I was, but then he said the comma, it's like, yeah, that probably needs a comma.

[00:08:06] Though there's a lot of commas in that sentence as it is.

[00:08:09] Well, yeah, that's why you bring out more sentences.

[00:08:11] Yeah, yeah.

[00:08:13] Yeah.

[00:08:15] So it does need to be broken up.

[00:08:17] I unfortunately didn't have time to break it up.

[00:08:20] How fucking dare.

[00:08:22] Did you finish this last minute?

[00:08:24] Do you think you're a me?

[00:08:26] Well, I found this while reading it and then didn't do anything with it

[00:08:34] because I just stumbled over that last bit and I was like, oh, I'll find it later.

[00:08:37] And I found it before the podcast and I was like, oh wait, that's run on sentence.

[00:08:42] Uh-oh.

[00:08:44] Oh, dude.

[00:08:46] So yeah, it just needs to be broken up more.

[00:08:50] Yeah.

[00:08:52] And then I have a conjunction junction.

[00:08:57] All right.

[00:08:59] And next stop, conjunction junction.

[00:09:01] It doesn't feel real.

[00:09:04] Because of this, I've made corpses tastier.

[00:09:08] I learned different ways to cook human meat based on Eric's descriptions of people.

[00:09:14] It's morbid, but it's effective.

[00:09:18] But here we are, the king of bad movies being awarded.

[00:09:24] It was Eduardo Jimenez and Indigo McCabe.

[00:09:32] I'm just going to stop you right now.

[00:09:34] It is actually human humanez.

[00:09:38] It's like, it's like jalapeno.

[00:09:42] Yeah.

[00:09:48] Jalapeno.

[00:09:49] I got it.

[00:09:50] Yeah.

[00:09:51] Just just I just want to bring that up just because like yeah, like that's how you see that last name.

[00:09:59] Continue.

[00:10:02] That was Finn.

[00:10:04] Oh, really?

[00:10:07] Finn, no!

[00:10:09] Oh wow.

[00:10:12] He's fine.

[00:10:13] Well, yeah, that was like opportune interjection then.

[00:10:21] Yeah, that was pretty short.

[00:10:26] Yeah, and for those unaware, Mikey grabbed sentences throughout the story that started with words that they probably shouldn't.

[00:10:30] Like it sends her butts because there's always better words to use.

[00:10:34] Indeed.

[00:10:36] All right, I guess we're on to the grammar in yellow with gamer.

[00:10:39] Yeah, I got one.

[00:10:42] Eric walked slowly up to the door and shickly opened it.

[00:10:46] It was Eduardo.

[00:10:49] How do you say his last name?

[00:10:51] Jimenez.

[00:10:52] Jimenez?

[00:10:53] Yeah, like treat the J as a as an H.

[00:10:59] Okay, Eduardo Jimenez.

[00:11:01] God damn.

[00:11:04] Just completely ignoring your...

[00:11:06] Now that we've insulted the Latinx community.

[00:11:10] Thank you.

[00:11:11] Ikea, Ikea, and the indigo McCabe.

[00:11:14] They were holding a bag.

[00:11:16] So when this bag is brought up, it's very soon to be revealed that it has the body of Yancey in it.

[00:11:24] However, when it was first described, I imagined it was like a paper bag or Walmart sized plastic bag that they were just holding.

[00:11:31] Yeah.

[00:11:32] To reveal that there was an entire human body in there, it was surprising to say the least.

[00:11:36] I was like, okay, is this a bag of holding now?

[00:11:39] Yeah, it probably should have been a little bit more descriptive on like what that bag was because like...

[00:11:43] Yeah, if it was a clarification that the double bag or something, you know.

[00:11:47] Or body bag.

[00:11:50] Oh my God, can you imagine?

[00:11:54] But yes.

[00:11:55] Well, it doesn't have like all of Yancey.

[00:12:00] I think it like has...

[00:12:01] Oh no, inside was the bloodied corpse of Yancey Simpson.

[00:12:05] Yeah.

[00:12:06] So it was like the entire body bag.

[00:12:08] We know, we all know.

[00:12:10] Yeah.

[00:12:11] I mean, it's entirely possible if they chopped them up so it's easier to fit in a smaller bag.

[00:12:18] Or who knows?

[00:12:19] They are celebrities and like actors and it says we all know.

[00:12:23] So like maybe this is just the secret cabal of celeb cannibals that can just pay off the police and stuff like that.

[00:12:32] Cabal invisibility.

[00:12:34] Cabal.

[00:12:35] Cabal.

[00:12:38] Wow, that's a really deep cut.

[00:12:41] Oh yeah.

[00:12:43] But that's all I got for her.

[00:12:45] All right.

[00:12:46] Well then I suppose we'll move on to actual thoughts.

[00:12:50] I'm going to start with this one here.

[00:12:51] I work for the actor Eric Hastings III, a third generation legacy actor, charming, drunk and a cannibal who needs flesh to survive.

[00:12:59] Believe me, I don't know how it works either.

[00:13:02] I'm scared to ask.

[00:13:04] What I do know is he needs to eat to survive at least once every two weeks.

[00:13:11] So I guess he really is just a regular cannibal.

[00:13:19] But there might be like some supernatural aspect just like on the side of like kind of like how a vampire needs to like drink blood.

[00:13:25] Otherwise they something bad happens or it's like maybe like he just needs to eat.

[00:13:30] Otherwise, he dies.

[00:13:31] Otherwise he dies.

[00:13:32] Like he can only get sustenance real real like actual sustenance from eating human flesh.

[00:13:38] Maybe.

[00:13:39] Yeah, it's we don't know what happens.

[00:13:41] Yeah.

[00:13:42] But like otherwise like that's like otherwise he's pretty regular.

[00:13:45] He's pretty ordinary.

[00:13:46] Otherwise, like there's no really cool like supernatural abilities unless maybe the cannibalistic ability also improves his appearance and charisma as an actor.

[00:13:56] Like maybe that's why.

[00:13:57] And again, like as we find out later on, like maybe that's also the key to a lot of celebrity success.

[00:14:04] Actors or cannibals.

[00:14:06] Exactly. That's again the secret.

[00:14:08] You know, believe it or not, there is actually a conspiracy theory similar to this in Hollywood about like the rich eating people and shit.

[00:14:16] Yeah, like I'm pretty sure I've heard like this kind of conspiracy theory about Hollywood.

[00:14:22] Like that's why like a lot of like movies like like specifically the movie like night teeth and some other movies I've seen.

[00:14:32] They play on with the fact that like vampires are actors and actresses in Hollywood because it's like sort of an allegory or an allegory for or the rich and famous being like kind of monsters.

[00:14:48] Yeah.

[00:14:49] But yeah, I guess from what I said earlier from like the previous episode where I was like, hope we go maybe the sequel will kind of explain a little bit more about like the whole cannibalism thing with the character.

[00:15:02] We don't really get that in this one.

[00:15:04] That's kind of a shame.

[00:15:07] But that's yeah, that's all I got for that quote and comments for that.

[00:15:11] So I'll move on to the next thing.

[00:15:16] Eric's made my job much easier ever since I introduced you all to him.

[00:15:22] So is Valerie like pulling a she hulk here and like talking to the audience past the fourth wall.

[00:15:29] Like, way I saw it is the story she posted is something that she posted in world.

[00:15:38] So that makes that actually like ads because I was thinking it's like, oh, maybe it's like a psychosis thing again.

[00:15:45] Like how like why she hulk like breaks the fourth wall both in the comics and then in the more recent TV show is like it's part of her hulkism like that's like she doesn't have another person like another personality in her head.

[00:15:55] She has us that she talks to.

[00:15:59] Yeah, it's kind of like that and like why like Deadpool is kind of insane.

[00:16:02] So like that's why you can see the fourth wall in comics.

[00:16:07] That's it plays.

[00:16:08] It's often played in comics for like why characters can break the fourth wall.

[00:16:11] So it's actually like a type of psychosis.

[00:16:13] And so like that's why I was kind of thinking like, oh, maybe that's part of like her trauma induced like psychosis of like working for this monster kind of thing is that she's just starting to talk to like the fourth wall like like just an audience that she only she can see.

[00:16:26] But yeah, that actually what you just brought up that like the previous story was posted sort of opens up like explains like a little bit more about how she was outed by the the two other cannibals is like we know Eric.

[00:16:39] We all know it was on Instagram.

[00:16:42] Yeah.

[00:16:44] It was on this weird creepypasta wiki Val fucking posted it under a he's aware of it.

[00:16:51] Yeah, he's aware of it too because he's treating her better because she did that.

[00:16:56] Yes.

[00:16:57] But yeah, like he's like just doesn't realize like I guess the repercussions or I guess there are no repercussions in this world for being actual cannibal.

[00:17:06] It's very confusing.

[00:17:08] It kind of like goes against itself a little bit because like, I don't know.

[00:17:13] It's weird.

[00:17:14] Yeah, I'm going to say right now this is part of the like I sort of the reason why I enjoyed this was because I kind of just started playing.

[00:17:21] I just got a dove into the story as a horror comedy.

[00:17:25] Like this is very much like death becomes her kind of style of thing where it is dealing with morbid situate like morbid contact or morbid context and again POV from a kill from a monster or a killer, but it's having fun with it and being kind of silly.

[00:17:44] So I just kind of really enjoyed it for that.

[00:17:46] And like from that I was looking at from that angle.

[00:17:49] Most of the story so that's why a lot of my where a lot of my positivity is coming from is like I just kind of accepted this whole like loopiness.

[00:17:58] But I digress.

[00:17:59] I'll move on to the next thing I have.

[00:18:01] His performance was so good that people made memes and compilations of some of his most popular scenes in lines.

[00:18:08] I was so shocked by the depth he gave to this character, especially considering his previous works have been direct to VOD teen slashers.

[00:18:18] He earned this.

[00:18:20] Why does this feel like it's a nod to actors like Robert Downey Jr. and like Nicolas Cage and their career trajectories?

[00:18:30] Like they like he was a drunken, drugged up mess of an actor until he cleaned up and then hit it big with like a big movie franchise or a big movie a la like Marvel or something.

[00:18:43] I don't know. I guess that's really just an arc that a lot of celebs in Hollywood end up with.

[00:18:50] This one just also happens to be a cannibal like most of Hollywood.

[00:18:54] I mean, what? At least Shia Labeouf.

[00:18:57] Yeah. Like this is sort of like it makes me wonder if like that is part of like the I guess the commentary in the story is like the because like it definitely feels like like that arc is like very prevalent, especially in like a lot of like both in real life and in the real world.

[00:19:13] And in fiction of like celebrity celebrity them is like a character like our person like gets their start in like humble beginnings or like they kind of wrecked their career a little bit by like drinking and being getting into drugs.

[00:19:25] And then they eventually like go to rehab or and shape up and then make it big as of and get big and get awards and stuff after later on.

[00:19:34] So I just was wondering if there was some kind of like maybe that was some of the commentary that was that was intentional for this story.

[00:19:42] Maybe.

[00:19:44] And then I'll move on to the next thing here. This is wonderful. I whispered to Eric as he walked off the carpet.

[00:19:51] I know, I've never been this esteemed.

[00:19:55] I'm sorry. Why are you here? A sniveling voice said, Yancy.

[00:20:04] Sorry.

[00:20:06] Yeah.

[00:20:09] Yancy, his greasy hair covered a single eye. His pale skin almost made him look translucent.

[00:20:17] Hi.

[00:20:19] Hi, Yancy, Eric said.

[00:20:22] He's trying to be civil.

[00:20:24] No. Hello, Yancy. Hello, Yancy.

[00:20:28] Hello, Eric.

[00:20:31] No. Answer the question. Why are you here? Yancy retorted.

[00:20:36] Did neither of them read the nominations?

[00:20:38] And so as I like read like literally like before I even read the like the description sniveling, that was actually the voice I read Yancy's like line in was like, I'm sorry.

[00:20:50] Why are you here? Like that sniveling snootiness.

[00:20:55] Just based on his name alone.

[00:20:57] Yeah, exactly.

[00:21:00] In fact, we were told he's an asshole.

[00:21:02] Well, yeah, yeah, we were kind of told he was an asshole. Yeah.

[00:21:06] And then the next thing I have here.

[00:21:09] Hey, I'm sorry about him, Eric said. Don't apologize kid. Sometimes we got haters and sometimes there are fellow actors, Eduardo said.

[00:21:19] You two enjoy the night. Eric, you earned this. It was a pleasure working with you.

[00:21:24] And Valerie, keep them in check. Indigo added. Thank you guys, Eric said.

[00:21:30] So, again, this like part of what I was saying when I dove into the story, when's the horror going to drop?

[00:21:39] Don't get me wrong.

[00:21:41] I'm really enjoying the read.

[00:21:44] Especially like at this point in the story, I was like really enjoying the read. I was just wondering when like the actual like the horror was going to happen.

[00:21:52] Like the I was wondering that too, as I finished reading the story.

[00:21:56] Yeah. And like, I this story court for me it kind of fits the bill of like a wholesome horror because like it's in that aesthetic line of like we're following a monster.

[00:22:06] Like, yes, like we have to like as an audience, we acknowledge that Eric is a monster.

[00:22:10] He eats people and Val helps him in some of that. But this entire story was very wholesome all the way through almost.

[00:22:18] Yes. Like it was like it was just sort of a slice of life of a cannibal actor.

[00:22:23] Yeah, of them being friends. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, being friends.

[00:22:28] It falls it falls in line with buddy horror like heavily in this way, especially buddy horror by the end when like Eric we all know.

[00:22:36] Don't worry. We're one of you.

[00:22:39] And then they just have like a little after party at Eric's place and like where they they all like have a little have a Yancey hors d'oeuvres except for Val because she has a grilled cheese.

[00:22:51] Which does answer actually my question from previous or clarifies my questions from previous words like no, she isn't a cannibal.

[00:22:56] It was just like she's going to clean up or something like that, which you had brought up or you would clarify for me last week.

[00:23:03] You thought that he was wanting to share the food when he said so we can you know, meanwhile, I'm like, no, the you know means something dude while he eats.

[00:23:13] Yeah. But apparently he's cleaned up since then because like at least this one the story doesn't like address any of that.

[00:23:19] No, not at all. So that's actually kind of like again we we're getting like a character arc in this in this sequel to from the previous one.

[00:23:31] It's less skeevy.

[00:23:33] Jarring how much different it is though.

[00:23:36] Yeah, I guess but I was here for it honestly.

[00:23:43] But I'll move on to the next thing here, which is about actually the movie role he was in.

[00:23:47] Yeah, so this is a scene from the from the movie that they're showing at the awards like and how why he got the award and such.

[00:23:54] Yes, Eric leaned forward and took his glasses off making eye contact with the tenant because I need money.

[00:24:02] Francis, do you need money? I don't think so.

[00:24:05] I need money. I don't care what you think is morally ethical or legal.

[00:24:10] I'm your fucking landlord. Do you understand me? You wouldn't have a home if it wasn't for me.

[00:24:17] So don't you ever backtalk me again. Never forget how lucky you are.

[00:24:23] And I'm like so I read like through this and like reading this part of the story of like where we're getting a little bit more context of like the movie that he's nominated for.

[00:24:30] I was like, I wonder how much like life influenced art here with Eric.

[00:24:35] Like I can kind of see some parallels here with Eric's off and on like like Eric's life off and on camera.

[00:24:45] Primarily from like the previous story as well because like he sort of again like the whole like the monster using his his lived in experience to kind of like do this, do this role.

[00:24:57] Maybe he's just a method actor and he was so into being that jerk of a character that it like became him for real.

[00:25:03] Maybe. Yeah, but then that doesn't explain why his like dad is also a cannibal thing.

[00:25:08] Well, being cannibal or not, that doesn't mean you're an asshole.

[00:25:11] Oh yeah, that's true.

[00:25:13] It's because he's a bad guy doesn't mean he's a bad guy.

[00:25:15] Yeah, exactly. If Rick and Ralph has taught us anything.

[00:25:18] Yeah.

[00:25:19] I'm gonna move on.

[00:25:21] Okay.

[00:25:22] I didn't respond and shoved him.

[00:25:24] He lost his footing and fell backwards down the stairs leading to the theater.

[00:25:28] As soon as he hit the bottom, I heard a crack.

[00:25:31] I looked down the stairs and saw the bloodied mangled corpse of Yancy Simpson.

[00:25:36] I know I should feel bad, but I don't.

[00:25:39] Honestly, this is like the one time she shouldn't feel bad.

[00:25:44] Fuck Yancy.

[00:25:46] Yes, 100%.

[00:25:47] I don't care if that makes you sound like a psychopath.

[00:25:50] Like fuck this guy.

[00:25:52] I mean, he's specifically like he just admitted to like cheating the award ceremony and all that.

[00:26:01] Yeah, and then quoting about it like outside.

[00:26:03] Yeah.

[00:26:05] And the fact that the award was actually for like it had on its name like on the little like name plaque.

[00:26:11] It had Eric.

[00:26:13] Yes.

[00:26:14] Yeah, so that's clearly just a complete utter dick move.

[00:26:17] And like those people need to be eradicated.

[00:26:22] But I digress from my opinions.

[00:26:26] I'll move on.

[00:26:31] Eduardo and Indigo looked at each other and laughed, throwing the bag on the ground.

[00:26:38] No, I think that is the body bag.

[00:26:39] That is quite a feat in itself.

[00:26:41] I know I'm just imagining the both holding like what's like either side of it and just like.

[00:26:47] One of them is just jacked.

[00:26:49] Yeah, like an Arnold analog.

[00:26:51] Yeah, Eduardo.

[00:26:52] Yeah, no, you know, it's Indigo.

[00:26:54] Yeah, probably.

[00:26:56] Yeah, Eric opened it gasping inside was the bloodied corpse of Yancy Smith.

[00:27:02] Yancy Simpson.

[00:27:03] He wanted to say Yancy Smith for some reason.

[00:27:08] The bloodied corpse of Yancy Simpson.

[00:27:10] My jaw dropped as I looked at the senior actors.

[00:27:13] What we thought Eric might want to celebrate a celebratory dinner.

[00:27:18] Huh, Eric?

[00:27:20] Did you know that?

[00:27:22] No.

[00:27:23] How did they know?

[00:27:24] Eduardo walked up to Eric and laughed.

[00:27:26] Buddy, your assistant falls you everywhere.

[00:27:29] If that's not a dead giveaway, she's your body collector.

[00:27:32] I don't know what is.

[00:27:34] Indigo smiled.

[00:27:35] Typically, actors rely on each other for meat.

[00:27:38] So it's always obvious to us when we see a good kid like you running around with an assistant.

[00:27:46] Wait, I was right earlier.

[00:27:48] This is like my reaction as I read this part.

[00:27:51] It's like from like earlier because I had just taken that note about like, you know, actors being like being cannibals and stuff that.

[00:27:58] And I was like, wait, I was right.

[00:28:01] The rich and famous of Hollywood are all monsters.

[00:28:04] Of course they are.

[00:28:06] This is like to me, like reading this part, it was like kind of like a mature version of like a Goosebumps twist ending.

[00:28:15] Like there's that one Goosebumps story where like they suspect that the librarian is a monster.

[00:28:20] And then spoilers for a Goosebumps novel from like the 90s.

[00:28:25] It's revealed that like the kids mom and dad are actually also monsters and that they will eventually become monsters themselves.

[00:28:33] They just don't know it yet.

[00:28:35] And there's a couple of other stories like kids novels and some of that are like horror kids novels that like do that as well.

[00:28:41] Where like the kids are like trying to escape the monster and then they realize it's actually a family member or like a parent and that they're also monsters.

[00:28:51] But yeah, so that's nothing like I'm not like shaming the story for doing that kind of ending.

[00:28:55] I just like I this is just so goddamn horror wholesome because it's horrific and horrifying.

[00:29:04] Like it has like horror genre, like aesthetic, but it's so such a wholesome ending like Eric has friends.

[00:29:12] Yes.

[00:29:13] Eric is friend.

[00:29:14] He is friend.

[00:29:15] To maybe date the podcast.

[00:29:20] That's fine.

[00:29:22] Yeah.

[00:29:25] But I'll move on to my last note here with this quote.

[00:29:31] We drank and the actors ate not me.

[00:29:33] I opted for a grilled cheese and the night was divine.

[00:29:37] At some point, Eric grabbed my hand and looked at me.

[00:29:40] I couldn't have asked for a better assistant.

[00:29:42] He said I smiled.

[00:29:43] Ladies and gentlemen, Eric Hastings, the third, my favorite man in Hollywood.

[00:29:48] Yeah, personally, I fucking loved the story and I want more like that's that's really all I have to say by the end here.

[00:29:56] I had a fun read, but this was this was a hell of a fun read for me.

[00:30:01] And it was I just really enjoy a wholesome buddy horror story.

[00:30:08] And when's the sequel?

[00:30:10] Serena writes mean the sequel.

[00:30:13] Yeah, the three cool.

[00:30:14] Yes.

[00:30:16] Yeah, no, I was not sure how the story was going to go.

[00:30:21] And by the end of it, I was like, I love this.

[00:30:25] So yeah, that's that's that's my actual thoughts for the story.

[00:30:30] Now now for the scary part, Mikey, the East has three evil.

[00:30:35] That's the true spotlight slowly creaking over to you.

[00:30:41] All right. Well, it's time to be critically silly.

[00:30:44] That's always good coming.

[00:30:48] I put my headband and glasses on and open the door.

[00:30:52] Oh, no. When I read this, my mind went back to the first story where all she had was her headband and glasses.

[00:31:01] Yep. Yeah. Yeah.

[00:31:05] So the story she's just basically nude at the ceremony.

[00:31:10] I mean, that's not the weirdest like awards dress I've seen somebody wear.

[00:31:17] Honestly. Yeah.

[00:31:19] Everybody remember Lady Gaga's meat suit or meat dress vaguely?

[00:31:27] I mean, the Met Gala just happened like there were some pretty weird things in that one.

[00:31:32] Anyway, sorry, I digress.

[00:31:34] Mikey. Yeah. So at that point, I'm like, OK, she's naked.

[00:31:42] Then I continue reading and there he was.

[00:31:47] Eric Hastings, the third, my boss, really?

[00:31:51] The cat's eyeglasses. This is the Academy Awards, Val.

[00:31:56] I know. I know. I think it looks nice with the dress, though.

[00:32:01] He looked me up and down. OK, you're right. Let's go.

[00:32:06] Now, that's the only mention of the dress.

[00:32:10] There's no description. So my mind just went to she's wearing her birthday dress.

[00:32:18] I yeah, the thought comes to mind or the title comes to mind.

[00:32:22] It actually should be changed to The Assistant's New Wardrobe, like kind of like the Emperor's New Wardrobe,

[00:32:29] where the emperor, like the king or the emperor from that story, like the guy gives him like a really fancy dress,

[00:32:38] like outfit, but it's really just like imaginary.

[00:32:41] And so he's walking around naked the whole time.

[00:32:44] Yeah.

[00:32:47] And of course, Eric would be like fine with it.

[00:32:49] It's like, yeah, no, it really it really fits.

[00:32:51] It really fits that that dress you have that you're totally wearing.

[00:32:57] Yes, it turns out Eric is an asshole because he's letting her go to the awards.

[00:33:02] Yeah, she's actually she's actually just like insane and from the from the trauma of like having to do this work.

[00:33:08] And so like she's just kind of like La La Land now.

[00:33:11] You're making it so much darker than what it is.

[00:33:14] I'm kind of for it too.

[00:33:16] Like, don't get me wrong, I liked it as it is, but I'm also for this.

[00:33:20] Yeah. All right.

[00:33:23] And then my next comment is on the ending, where it's revealed that the other actors are cannibals as well.

[00:33:35] Yeah.

[00:33:36] And for me, this actually removed the creepiness.

[00:33:42] Yes, I felt because if everyone's a cannibal, then everything is normal.

[00:33:49] If everything is normal, then the story isn't creepy.

[00:33:52] Yeah. Yeah, this story definitely put into my like my my spectrum of horror.

[00:34:01] It isn't so much like the like atmosphere of horror as so much as like it's going more for like the aesthetic of horror rather than like it's definitely on the far end of the aesthetic side of the spectrum of horror.

[00:34:18] Yeah, I can. I can. I also kind of had that as well, but it didn't ruin the story for me because I was just at that point I was still like high on the story.

[00:34:32] Thanks.

[00:34:33] That's in the master class.

[00:34:35] Okay, gamer.

[00:34:38] Alrighty then.

[00:34:42] Let's see. I guess I talked about most of my first note just in regards to the story publicly posted in the world now, although like,

[00:34:50] He's he's surprised that they know about it, even though he knows that she posted this online.

[00:34:59] And he changed his life around because she posted online and yet he doesn't he's are both surprised that these two actors know about it.

[00:35:09] So that's that's where the weird conflict of what's going on happens here.

[00:35:13] Yeah, that's why I don't think it's actually like in universe like been posted but like, I don't I can't explain otherwise like like what that's that first part.

[00:35:23] Outside of her since sharing this with you guys, or whatever.

[00:35:27] I don't so here actually I actually just clued in, maybe something about it.

[00:35:32] That's just like he's gotten nicer and so that he she's not referencing like that like since she did something she's referencing that she like that that as a as a time point or as a point in time when he started acting nicer to her.

[00:35:47] Not because as a result of that. So like, it's sort of like, since the since the last basically say it's basically saying, since the last story, like and those events.

[00:36:00] He's acted a lot nicer. Not that like he knows that she not that she knows not that he knows that she has described the previous story to somebody.

[00:36:09] Yes, it is a good way to describe the time frame. However, she straight up says, since I introduced you all to him, she is directly saying that she has told other people about him who's you in this in this situation.

[00:36:30] You're right but you're also missing a point.

[00:36:34] She said she does exactly say what you said, like, since she introduced us to him.

[00:36:42] But that's basically like, she's just saying like, since she told us the previous story.

[00:36:50] And about like, since she introduced him to us as in like, since she introduced us to Eric in the previous story. Not. It's not it's not a

[00:37:02] It's not like a straightforward like, like since she likes he doesn't know about the about about us. We know about him, third thing that makes sense.

[00:37:12] Yeah, but it's like, yeah, it's either she's breaking the fourth wall, or this is an in lore thing of she put this on the internet. It's one of the two things.

[00:37:22] And I think it's more she's just breaking the fourth wall and like it's sort of that.

[00:37:27] It's sort of like that thing like we're like a character is like tied up and it's like, at the end of the beginning of movie and then they just look looks at the camera like, well, I guess you're or just like their voice just kind of like pops in like narrating

[00:37:38] it's like, Well, I guess you're wondering where how I got to this point, like that kind of thing.

[00:37:44] I think it's more of a style thing choice rather than like an in world immersion thing. I guess. Yeah, just ever since I read that I was like trying to wrap my head around what that means. Yeah.

[00:37:55] Yeah, I think literally, literally or like not literally but like, literally, it is the authors using a narration device, rather than for as for the for style rather than in immersion immersive like substance.

[00:38:13] Because yeah, like as soon as I thought about the idea of her actually posting this and this actually being on the internet in the lore of the world. Why would Eric be okay with that? Like both Eric and Valerie are at that point admitting countless murders.

[00:38:30] Exactly. Yeah.

[00:38:31] Putting the information on the internet.

[00:38:33] Yeah, no, exactly. Yeah, yeah.

[00:38:35] The labs are often pretty tight up about the personal lives as is a secret cannibal and pervert would definitely count words that. Yeah. Like, don't get me wrong. I liked your original idea of like it being in world but like I think it's, I think it's the simplest explanation here is that it was just a stylized like narrative device rather than actually in in world.

[00:38:57] Based on the response of them to their fellow actors at the end. Yes, you're probably right. But the whole time me reading it, I was under the impression that this is fine.

[00:39:09] This is just in this world cannibals are a thing. It's, you know, he's cannibals. Okay, cool.

[00:39:16] You know, it's like the movie Daybreakers where like vampire society has over over as like kind of taken over human society. And like the like they walk around like like and like they walk around in their like covered covered like streets and societies, like it's like it's every day and like humans are the are the are the outliers.

[00:39:39] But it's yeah, so it's probably not that but it like I can understand where you're coming from. We're like, where are you like we saw that? Yeah. And in regards to him like being off alcohol and being complimentary to her frequently and all that much more appreciative.

[00:39:55] With my head Canon of it being she posted this on the internet, and me thinking how can he possibly be okay with that? That also put my mind in maybe he's not okay with this. And by the end of this, it turns out that he's just going to turn around and kill Valerie for what she did.

[00:40:13] And he's just falling into a false sense of security. And that's where the horrors, which that would have been really cool idea. Actually, I really like that. But no, no, we got more wholesome than actual horror, which Yeah, I think yeah, sorry.

[00:40:28] Oh, no, I was just gonna say like, which which could turn off some people. I will agree. Like it could definitely like if that's not what you're expecting and like that can be a disappointment. Especially with a not safe for work content warning at the top.

[00:40:43] I don't under like I understand it for the previous story. I don't understand it for this one. Yeah, I don't know. Well, it's explained she's naked.

[00:40:53] We have read we've read tons of other stories that do not have that, that have this have this story's level of like description of nudity, ie non existent.

[00:41:05] Or or simply implied not descriptive, not skeevy descriptive like it was in the previous story, like previous story, we can all agree that needed that and NSFW. Yeah, this one.

[00:41:17] I think you probably could have gotten away with maybe because it's like associated with the previous one, like they're putting this one.

[00:41:24] You're actually not you're you're actually spot on because like, maybe they put that there for the sequel because they knew that people might go to the next the other story that maybe aren't that are like teenagers or like young adults or whatever.

[00:41:33] Because it's creep bosses like kids up basically. Yeah. So like they the the end when you put one of those NSFW things up, sometimes websites have like restrictions for like if you're a minor kind of thing.

[00:41:45] Oh, I see. Yeah. So it won't give you this one and lock you out of the first one. Exactly. Like so like this is like the first one.

[00:41:52] Yes.

[00:41:53] So my only other notice is you go to the whole wholesome ending. So while this one isn't like pervy and gross, it does a great job of giving a message that you can't stay away from it.

[00:42:05] access it gets both stories.

[00:42:08] Yes, which might be the best way of doing that.

[00:42:12] Yeah.

[00:42:13] But I'll move on.

[00:42:14] Yes.

[00:42:15] So my only other note is just

[00:42:17] you recur to the whole wholesome ending.

[00:42:19] So while this one isn't like pervy and gross,

[00:42:23] this one is toned back so much

[00:42:25] that it's kind of sappy in my opinion.

[00:42:28] I can see that.

[00:42:30] Like, yeah, there's still cannibalism in it,

[00:42:33] but the whole plot up until then could be something

[00:42:36] that happened on a sitcom or like a romcom or something

[00:42:40] like even him dying, like he died in Seinfeld.

[00:42:46] Like the previous story was like horror,

[00:42:48] but there was comedy.

[00:42:50] This one is comedy, but horror.

[00:42:54] Is there horror though?

[00:42:55] Like horror because they're monsters,

[00:42:56] like they're cannibals.

[00:42:58] That's where the horror comes from like that.

[00:43:00] But like it's sort of that dichotomy.

[00:43:02] I understand where you're coming from on this.

[00:43:04] I really do.

[00:43:05] Yeah.

[00:43:06] And it's just like, it's...

[00:43:12] Yeah, here's my counter or my suggestion

[00:43:16] on like how to take the story.

[00:43:18] This is all being told to us by Valerie

[00:43:20] who by the end of the previous story,

[00:43:22] Stockholm was either Stockholmed

[00:43:24] or just like showed her true colors toward Eric.

[00:43:28] So this is all through the lens of Valerie.

[00:43:32] Who is a broken person now.

[00:43:36] So there might be a lot more horrifying shit happening,

[00:43:39] but it's sort of like that trailer for the pyro

[00:43:45] in Team Fortress 2 where it's just like

[00:43:47] when you get to see through the eyes of the pyro

[00:43:49] who's like this whole like, what was that shit?

[00:43:54] What was the song?

[00:43:55] It's like a sunshine, lollipops and rainbows,

[00:43:58] like that kind of thing.

[00:43:59] And like everything's like through this like colorful lens.

[00:44:02] And meanwhile, it's like a very graphic horror bend

[00:44:05] in reality to everybody else.

[00:44:07] Yeah.

[00:44:09] I think like that's how you could take this story

[00:44:11] is that since we're getting this from the POV of Valerie

[00:44:14] who's already kind of shown in the previous story

[00:44:16] to be a broken person,

[00:44:18] we're getting her broken lens.

[00:44:23] Maybe.

[00:44:24] And if, I know she didn't,

[00:44:25] but if she actually posted this on the internet,

[00:44:29] if she fell in love with him after that point,

[00:44:31] she might be doing this follow-up post

[00:44:34] to like patch up his good name,

[00:44:36] even though he's still an asshole.

[00:44:39] Yeah.

[00:44:40] Like basically it's like a property.

[00:44:41] Like putting him on a pedestal now.

[00:44:43] Yeah, exactly.

[00:44:46] I don't know, maybe.

[00:44:47] That is a way to take it anyway.

[00:44:49] Yeah.

[00:44:50] But I don't know.

[00:44:51] It's really not handed to me that way.

[00:44:54] Well, only if you like, yeah.

[00:44:56] It depends on like,

[00:44:58] on what you were kind of going into the story at with.

[00:45:01] So yeah.

[00:45:02] Yeah.

[00:45:03] Like we had to go through a whole discussion

[00:45:04] for three people to get to that idea.

[00:45:07] So I don't think it's on the top layers of this cake.

[00:45:11] Yeah.

[00:45:12] Deep in there.

[00:45:14] And yeah, I'll move on a little bit.

[00:45:16] The reveal that seemingly all or most actors

[00:45:20] are also cannibals for reasons

[00:45:23] kind of fell flat for me too when I read it.

[00:45:25] Okay.

[00:45:26] It's the same way that Mikey said it did.

[00:45:28] That's why I agreed with you, Mr. Sears.

[00:45:30] He said it because I had the exact same note.

[00:45:33] Because like Mikey,

[00:45:36] I was waiting for the horror to happen

[00:45:38] and the twist should have seemed more horrifying

[00:45:43] than it did, but like,

[00:45:45] because everything has been sunshine

[00:45:47] and lollipops the entire time,

[00:45:49] it just kind of also felt like that

[00:45:51] because he has friend now.

[00:45:53] Because he has friend.

[00:45:54] Yeah.

[00:45:55] Yeah.

[00:45:58] I mean, if you want to like, again,

[00:46:00] if you want to take it like from a horror angle,

[00:46:02] like feel bad for all the non cannibals

[00:46:04] that live in Hollywood now.

[00:46:05] Cause like, no, like, no, their worst fears are realized.

[00:46:08] Celebrities are cannibals and they get away with it.

[00:46:12] Yeah.

[00:46:13] I don't know.

[00:46:14] Or maybe it's in this world.

[00:46:18] If you're a fan,

[00:46:19] it's your lifelong dream to be eaten by an actor.

[00:46:22] Yeah.

[00:46:23] Could be.

[00:46:24] Could be.

[00:46:25] There are sadly people like that.

[00:46:28] I'm sure there is.

[00:46:31] Yeah, overall, well, yeah.

[00:46:33] I'm still in the head space that like,

[00:46:35] there's still like Stockholm syndrome going on with her

[00:46:38] and her apparent love for him isn't real.

[00:46:41] Even though like in this one,

[00:46:42] it seems like she's actually in love with him.

[00:46:45] But like the only way I could get a creepy vibe

[00:46:48] on this is remembering like, no,

[00:46:50] she didn't like this guy at all.

[00:46:53] He forced her to like him

[00:46:55] and that's where the horror is.

[00:46:57] But it's covered up with so many, so many layers of sap.

[00:47:02] There's so much sap on it.

[00:47:04] So much sap.

[00:47:05] It's so gooey.

[00:47:05] It's like an extra coating of sap.

[00:47:08] I have to dig through it all to find the horror.

[00:47:10] It just keeps smearing.

[00:47:11] Every time you try to wipe it away,

[00:47:13] it just keeps smearing.

[00:47:14] Yeah, yeah.

[00:47:16] But I will agree with you as a comedy,

[00:47:22] With horror included.

[00:47:24] Light amounts of horror in it.

[00:47:26] I think at that point,

[00:47:27] you're kind of like giving it a disservice.

[00:47:29] Like it does have horror.

[00:47:31] It's just, it's aesthetic.

[00:47:33] It's style rather than-

[00:47:35] Hot Fuzz has more horror than this.

[00:47:37] And Hot Fuzz, I would actually say is a horror comedy.

[00:47:40] Yes, it is.

[00:47:41] But Hot Fuzz is a good example.

[00:47:46] It is a very good balance of horror and comedy

[00:47:49] where it's like basically 50-50.

[00:47:52] There's a lot of tension throughout the whole thing

[00:47:54] of trying to figure out what's going on

[00:47:55] and there's dark shit happening.

[00:47:57] In this, it's like 90-10 or 75.

[00:48:03] There's so much of it being mundane

[00:48:07] and just comedy and normal stuff happening

[00:48:09] with very small amounts of horror.

[00:48:12] Meanwhile, the first one was all horror

[00:48:14] and all uncomfortable.

[00:48:16] See, again, I think the first one

[00:48:18] was more in line with Hot Fuzz.

[00:48:22] On the level of horror to comedy.

[00:48:25] Okay.

[00:48:26] I think it's more of, yeah.

[00:48:30] But yeah, we're all different people.

[00:48:32] We all have different views on it.

[00:48:33] That's just my view.

[00:48:34] Yeah.

[00:48:35] And I hope I'm not down to a fucking-

[00:48:40] With a stiffness?

[00:48:41] God damn it.

[00:48:44] I just hope I'm not trouncing your opinion on this.

[00:48:49] That's fine.

[00:48:50] This is a discussion.

[00:48:51] No, I know.

[00:48:53] We discuss and see each other's opinions on things

[00:48:55] and yeah, it's fine.

[00:48:57] Okay.

[00:48:58] But that's about all I got for actual notes until final.

[00:49:01] Okay.

[00:49:03] So onto final thoughts as I scroll down.

[00:49:08] Yeah, so I'm gonna recommend this story.

[00:49:11] It's definitely not a spooky creepypasta.

[00:49:13] I will give you all that.

[00:49:15] Probably because that's often very hard to do

[00:49:19] from a monster's POV

[00:49:21] and with the amount of humor

[00:49:24] that is kind of instilled into a story.

[00:49:28] This felt, it all see, this is a buddy horror to me,

[00:49:32] but in a much more goofier way

[00:49:34] than some other buddy horrors

[00:49:36] that we've sort of discovered in the show.

[00:49:41] It's fun and macabre because of the cannibal angle.

[00:49:47] Very much on the side of my spectrum

[00:49:50] of horror stylings over substance.

[00:49:53] And there's nothing wrong with horror styling

[00:49:54] over horror substance.

[00:49:56] It's just what you're expecting

[00:49:59] in a horror store or in a creepypasta.

[00:50:02] But yeah, so to me, this is perfectly okay

[00:50:05] for a horror styled creepypasta

[00:50:07] rather than a horror substance creepypasta.

[00:50:10] My opinion on it is like it was,

[00:50:12] I could not help but love the story

[00:50:14] as I was reading it.

[00:50:15] It was just such a fun read for me.

[00:50:17] So that's why I'm gonna recommend it.

[00:50:19] Mikey, the East End three-fold.

[00:50:23] Yeah, my issue with this is mundane,

[00:50:30] like going to an award show.

[00:50:33] And the only thing that really happens

[00:50:37] is that the guy that's evil,

[00:50:41] that's also a cannibal dies

[00:50:45] because he fell down a flight of stairs.

[00:50:48] I don't think Yancy was a cannibal.

[00:50:51] It depends if it's actors or cannibals or not.

[00:50:54] Well, some are, not all.

[00:50:56] Like-

[00:50:57] Are you sure?

[00:50:58] You don't know, it doesn't say.

[00:51:00] It doesn't say, but like, yeah.

[00:51:01] And I mean, like technically,

[00:51:03] if you really wanna get down

[00:51:04] to the definition of cannibal,

[00:51:06] cannibals are people who eat their own kind.

[00:51:10] So like them being cannibals,

[00:51:13] they're actually feeding on other cannibals,

[00:51:15] not human beings.

[00:51:18] If you really wanna nitpick here,

[00:51:21] if you wanna just like,

[00:51:21] lounge on that nitpick nook.

[00:51:23] You're really deep in there.

[00:51:25] Yeah, I'm falling through the cracks in the cushions.

[00:51:30] Yeah, and interestingly enough,

[00:51:34] like that seems to be the only way

[00:51:36] people die in these stories.

[00:51:38] Like the first guy that was brought home

[00:51:44] was tripped, fell and cracked his skull.

[00:51:47] Rue, it is the exact same one.

[00:51:49] They really is like, she's just like,

[00:51:52] they call her the head cracker, the tripper.

[00:51:58] She just trips people and to go to fall downstairs

[00:52:01] or like crack their head open on like,

[00:52:04] from trips and falls.

[00:52:07] Call her the clutch collector.

[00:52:11] Again, to be prevalent to like

[00:52:13] what's being like played in theaters right now.

[00:52:15] They call her the fall gal.

[00:52:19] Nice.

[00:52:24] Yes.

[00:52:25] Sorry.

[00:52:26] So, yeah, it was really mundane.

[00:52:30] And then the ending where it's revealed

[00:52:33] that there's more cannibals

[00:52:36] and there's actually a club of cannibals

[00:52:38] that don't need assistance

[00:52:42] because they help each other out.

[00:52:43] But it's obvious that he's a cannibal

[00:52:46] because he has an assistant.

[00:52:48] Yeah, I feel about that by the way.

[00:52:51] Always the new guys that use the assistants

[00:52:53] rather than use the support group.

[00:52:57] Every person that has an assistant with them

[00:52:59] is a cannibal.

[00:53:00] Batman, assistant.

[00:53:01] I robbed him a long time.

[00:53:03] Cannibal.

[00:53:06] Yeah.

[00:53:07] So the fact that sort of cannibals

[00:53:12] is normal for this world that has been created,

[00:53:17] it removes the creepiness for me.

[00:53:22] Like, it's just a part of their world.

[00:53:24] Yeah, because creepiness is generally stuff

[00:53:27] that isn't normal or isn't appreciated

[00:53:33] in normal circles.

[00:53:35] But if it is, then I don't know.

[00:53:38] I mean, like by that definition,

[00:53:39] Daybreakers would not be a creepy movie

[00:53:42] and it is a creepy movie.

[00:53:46] Because it's a movie where like vampire society

[00:53:48] has overtaken human society.

[00:53:52] Well, that's a very normal movie for vampires.

[00:53:55] Well, yeah, but all right.

[00:53:59] They're watching it as a human.

[00:54:01] Just like we are reading this as a not cannibal,

[00:54:04] right guys?

[00:54:07] Yes.

[00:54:09] Definitely not cannibal.

[00:54:11] Didn't find this creepy because we're cannibals.

[00:54:15] Yes.

[00:54:16] It's normal for us.

[00:54:20] Yeah, we got review cannibal, the cannibal in yellow

[00:54:23] and Mike Keith is the case stands for cannibal.

[00:54:30] Yeah, I don't know about that.

[00:54:31] Because poor literacy is cool.

[00:54:33] It's cute, yes.

[00:54:37] Wow, we are just like,

[00:54:39] we're having giggles.

[00:54:41] So we're like critical,

[00:54:43] silliness is at critical levels.

[00:54:45] Yeah, a little bit.

[00:54:49] Yeah, so continuing on,

[00:54:52] I'm not gonna recommend this.

[00:54:54] All right.

[00:54:56] And gamer.

[00:54:58] So when I read the first one,

[00:55:01] the first story is uncomfortable to read.

[00:55:04] In the way like watching a friend live in denial

[00:55:09] because of greed and being unable to help them.

[00:55:13] This one was, at least for me,

[00:55:15] kind of a boring read unfortunately,

[00:55:17] which might be partially because I don't tend to care

[00:55:20] about celebrities and such as much.

[00:55:23] So a story about a mundane awards ceremony

[00:55:26] with light comedy and light horror

[00:55:28] wasn't really grabbing me.

[00:55:31] The reveal at the end that the other actors

[00:55:32] were also cannibals wasn't exactly scary or anything for me.

[00:55:35] It muted any possibility for the creep actually.

[00:55:40] Because if they weren't cannibals,

[00:55:41] then there might've been a reason for Val and Eric

[00:55:43] to kill them or something.

[00:55:46] Like, hey, we're here for the party.

[00:55:48] And then it's like, yeah, actually.

[00:55:50] You know what, Val, it's been two weeks.

[00:55:54] Yes, right this way, Eduardo.

[00:55:56] Yeah.

[00:55:57] Basically, this is the most PG-13 story about cannibals

[00:56:01] that there could be, I think.

[00:56:02] Fair.

[00:56:03] Yeah, I don't know if anyone would agree with me or not.

[00:56:06] I agree with you in that this is how you feel,

[00:56:12] but I don't agree with your...

[00:56:16] I have a right to be wrong.

[00:56:17] Exactly.

[00:56:18] And I don't mean that in a bad way.

[00:56:20] Again, I see it differently.

[00:56:23] So yeah.

[00:56:25] And actually thinking about it,

[00:56:27] I wonder if this story might hit better,

[00:56:30] at least for me and Mikey,

[00:56:32] if we read this story and only this story

[00:56:36] and not the previous one.

[00:56:37] Because the end would actually be revealed.

[00:56:41] Yeah, that's true.

[00:56:42] Like this could...

[00:56:44] I wonder, I also wonder if maybe

[00:56:47] if this wasn't treated like it was a sequel

[00:56:50] to the previous one

[00:56:52] and was just sort of like another story with Eric and Val

[00:56:54] and just like, make the first story optional to read

[00:56:59] rather than have that one be...

[00:57:00] You had to read that one and then the sequel.

[00:57:03] Yeah, because we know from word one

[00:57:06] that he's a cannibal in this,

[00:57:07] but the end is still kind of set up like a reveal.

[00:57:13] Well, because it's a reveal that like...

[00:57:15] That it's more of a reveal that others know

[00:57:18] and that there's more cannibals out there.

[00:57:20] Yeah.

[00:57:21] But I don't know.

[00:57:23] Yeah, whereas the first story was like,

[00:57:25] it was just more of like her realizing

[00:57:27] just how broken she was for Eric.

[00:57:30] Like how much she had fallen for Eric

[00:57:32] and again, how broken.

[00:57:35] At least from my perspective,

[00:57:36] that's how I'm kind of interpreting her feelings

[00:57:38] toward all this stuff.

[00:57:40] And then in this one, the reveal at the end

[00:57:43] is that he's not alone as a cannibal.

[00:57:45] Like there are other cannibal actors out there.

[00:57:49] Yeah.

[00:57:49] Yeah.

[00:57:52] It just didn't really hit right for me.

[00:57:55] Okay.

[00:57:57] Because yeah, it on its own.

[00:58:00] And maybe Val this whole time didn't know he was a cannibal

[00:58:03] and she...

[00:58:04] Because like with the context of only having the story,

[00:58:07] we wouldn't really have the context

[00:58:09] that she's killed people before

[00:58:10] and given him people to eat.

[00:58:14] Although he does say Val and the cannibal, it's fine.

[00:58:18] So nevermind actually.

[00:58:19] Yeah.

[00:58:19] There's no true reveal

[00:58:21] because he does say that early on.

[00:58:22] Yeah, it's like literally from like in the first paragraph.

[00:58:24] Yeah, I just remember that as I was writing this.

[00:58:26] But it's fine.

[00:58:29] Yeah, going into this expecting to be creeped out

[00:58:32] is not gonna happen.

[00:58:34] And unfortunately, that's what I do most of the time.

[00:58:36] When I go into a story,

[00:58:36] I go into a story wanting to be creeped out

[00:58:39] and wanting to be immersed.

[00:58:41] And I couldn't get into either of those head spaces

[00:58:43] in this, unfortunately, at least for me.

[00:58:46] Just because of how mundane it was or...

[00:58:52] Well, some, I guess, I don't know.

[00:58:54] Yeah.

[00:58:56] Okay, very nice.

[00:58:58] I'm personally still not gonna recommend it.

[00:59:00] But if you...

[00:59:02] I would recommend it if you're looking for

[00:59:05] a more lighthearted and not necessarily scary story

[00:59:09] that has a slight creepiness to it.

[00:59:16] A more lighthearted story about cannibalism.

[00:59:19] It is.

[00:59:20] I know, but it's just like,

[00:59:21] I just can't help but chuckle at that idea.

[00:59:25] It's just like, if you're looking for a lighter...

[00:59:29] I might honestly recommend this story specifically,

[00:59:31] maybe not the previous one,

[00:59:33] to if the Kame House Party guys ever asked me

[00:59:35] for more creep bosses to read on their show,

[00:59:38] I might honestly recommend this one.

[00:59:40] Because this is the kind of thing that's low scare,

[00:59:43] but those guys are often looking for in creep bosses.

[00:59:46] They're not looking for the super ones

[00:59:47] that are gonna keep them up at night.

[00:59:49] They're looking for the more horror and chill sort of story.

[00:59:54] Yes, for sure.

[00:59:55] More casual, chill stories.

[00:59:59] Yeah, the read of this just shocked me

[01:00:01] of how different it was to the first one.

[01:00:05] I'm gonna be honest.

[01:00:06] Like I said at the start

[01:00:07] of my final recommendations here,

[01:00:09] the first one was uncomfortable for me to read

[01:00:11] the entire way through.

[01:00:13] And knowing that there was a sequel,

[01:00:15] I was like, ah, fuck.

[01:00:16] Yeah, I reminded you that we were recording today

[01:00:19] and you were like, great.

[01:00:21] I'm about to start reading this one.

[01:00:22] It's like, oh good, another Nod, Save for Work tag.

[01:00:24] Awesome.

[01:00:25] I'm like, and I had read it before.

[01:00:27] So I did tell you it's like,

[01:00:29] well actually I don't think

[01:00:30] that that's really necessary for this one,

[01:00:32] but like go into it.

[01:00:36] Like I was kind of trying to help buffer you

[01:00:37] a little bit, and then it's like,

[01:00:38] oh, it's not that bad.

[01:00:42] It just, I didn't like how it hit me basically.

[01:00:45] Okay.

[01:00:47] Well, you're, what's the word?

[01:00:50] Not open to your opinion.

[01:00:52] You're, I can't entitle it.

[01:00:54] Yeah, well you're entitled to your opinion as am I.

[01:00:57] As is Mikey, as is the world.

[01:01:00] So, but yeah, I guess that was it, right gamer?

[01:01:04] Yeah, pretty much.

[01:01:07] Well, I guess that is our final thoughts.

[01:01:10] One recommendation and two non-recommendations

[01:01:13] depending on your perspective on reading,

[01:01:18] on horror reading material.

[01:01:21] But that will do it for this week's episode.

[01:01:23] So if you like what you heard or if you didn't,

[01:01:25] leave us a comment in the comment section below

[01:01:26] if this gets posted.

[01:01:28] We're all on Twitter.

[01:01:29] Mikey is at the East Ends for Evil.

[01:01:30] The Gamer in Yellow is at the Gamer in Yellow

[01:01:32] without that W at the end

[01:01:33] because his name is too damn long.

[01:01:35] It really is.

[01:01:36] I'm at Review Cultist.

[01:01:38] I'm also on Blue Sky at Review Cultist

[01:01:40] so you can send me messages there.

[01:01:44] You can also send us emails

[01:01:45] at althentayburgamortis at gmail.com.

[01:01:48] That's, that's A-L-D-E-N-T-E-R-I-G-A-M-O-R-T-I-S

[01:01:52] at gmail.com.

[01:01:54] We're also gonna leave suggestions

[01:01:55] for other creep pastas, SCPs, spooky things.

[01:01:58] You creep it, we'll peep it.

[01:01:59] Yeah!

[01:02:01] And if you'd like to help support our show financially

[01:02:03] you can go to Patreon.

[01:02:04] Select the package you'd like to support us at.

[01:02:06] We have $2 and $5 tiers with special episodes,

[01:02:08] early access and extra content.

[01:02:11] To all our patrons that are helping support the show,

[01:02:13] thank you immensely.

[01:02:14] You're helping keep those hosting bills at bay

[01:02:16] and as always, we very much appreciate that.

[01:02:20] And to our listeners and the authors of these stories,

[01:02:22] thank you immensely.

[01:02:23] Without your listenership

[01:02:24] you'd be like screaming into the void.

[01:02:26] And without your authorship,

[01:02:29] without these stories that you write and post online

[01:02:31] and share with the internet,

[01:02:33] we really wouldn't have much of a show

[01:02:34] because we'd have nothing to talk about.

[01:02:36] So thank you.

[01:02:37] Until next time, I have been your host, Review Cannibal.

[01:02:41] I'm Mikey, the K stands for Cannibal.

[01:02:43] And I'm the Cannibal in yellow.

[01:02:44] And this has been,

[01:02:46] Al Dente Rigamortis.

[01:02:48] Sleep well.

[01:02:50] You get it?

[01:02:51] Our title's Al Dente Rigamortis

[01:02:53] cause it's creepy pasta,

[01:02:55] but also like it's cob and flesh

[01:03:00] cause like rigamortis and I'll leave.

[01:03:02] Oh, I get it.